Chapter 1

Introduction

“Our Lord! Grant us comfort in our spouses and descedents, and make us imams of the Godwary.”1

There is a natural desire in all human beings in wanting to have a worthy child, as all people wish to have healthy and righteous children. They are the light of the eyes and mirth of the soul of their parents. Indeed, even deplorable persons like their children to be good and commendable.

However, the motivation of those who have derived their teachings from the Glorious Qur’an is more intense in fulfilling this natural wish. Not only do they want their children to be good and worthy, but they also want their children within their family to become leaders and examples for all good people. Such people supplicate to Allah the Merciful through this verse in the holy Qur’an:

“Our Lord! Grant us comfort in our spouses and descedents, and make us imams of the Godwary.” (Qur’an, 25:74)

The important question is how can this lofty wish be obtained and how can the grounds for the acceptance of this supplication for children be met.

In answer, bringing up a worthy child is based on three main principles. They are:

1. A righteous family

2. Observing the rights of the child

3. The child having knowledge of his/her responsibilities

This book ‘Children in the Qur’an and Sunnah’ is dedicated in presenting the guidance and recommendations of the holy Qur’an and the great leaders of Islam regarding these principles, and it is divided into three sections.

The first section contains four chapters which are on the responsibilities of the Islamic society in relation to the establishment of a laudable family, the role of heredity in the happiness of a child, the role of nutrition of the father and mother in the health and happiness of the child, and the role of the formation of the foetus in the mother’s womb for the future life of the child as explained by the leaders of Islam.

Section two introduces the rights of a child from an Islamic viewpoint, and this section is divided into six chapters.

The first chapter is about the rights of an infant. These rights include: 1) Honouring the birth of the child; 2) The ritual bath of birth; 3) Reciting the Adhan in the right ear of the child and the Iqamah in the left ear; 4) Giving the newborn a taste of the water of FurÁt and the soil of Karbala; 5) Choosing a good name for the child; 6) Shaving the child’s head and donating the weight of its hair in gold or silver, 7) The slaughtering of an animal; 8) Circumcision.

The second chapter is about the rights of a suckling infant. This chapter deals with the child’s nutrition from its mother’s milk or the milk of an appropriate wet-nurse, and the necessity of respecting a child’s feelings.

The third chapter explains the child’s upbringing, being his most important right, then the importance of the child’s education and the responsibilities of the Islamic government and the families in this regard is explained, along with the most important aspect of this discussion, which is the method of upbringing a child.

Chapter four deals with the ethics of the upbringing of children, such as: being kind to them, respecting and greeting them, being just between them, fulfilling promises made to them and making them happy.

The fifth chapter turns the upbringer’s attention to the role of the child’s outer appearance, his sense of beauty, his desire to play and how these things lead to the enhancement of his growth.

The sixth chapter emphasizes on supplicating for children and refraining from cursing them and the role it has in their upbringing along with the parent’s program of raising them. This is why it is referred to as one of the rights of a child. The supplication of Imam al-Sajjad (a.s.) for his children that is mentioned at the end of this chapter is a worthy guide for Muslim families.

The third section explains the duties of a child. It is incumbent upon a qualified trainer that along with fulfilling the duties mentioned in sections one and two, he/she must provide the grounds for children to adopt a sense of responsibility.

This section which is divided into four chapters speaks about the personal duties of a child, and his duties in relation to his parents, his teachers, those older than him and his friends.

The targeted readers of this book ‘Children in the Qur’an and the Sunnah’ are families, upbringers, trainers and researchers of children education, and so children themselves are not the direct addressees in this compilation.

Another important point is that diligent attempts were made to combine in this work the most important teachings of the Qur’an and Islamic traditions in the field of upbringing and education of children. Important commentaries and necessary explanations have been added in particular places.

Without doubt, commentating on each of these guidelines would need the compiling of independent books in different fields of children’s upbringing. Therefore, this collection can be a valuable cultural source for those interested in the field of children’s education.

In conclusion, I would like to sincerely thank all my respected colleagues at the ‘Íadith Sciences and Studies Institute’ for assisting me in the compiling and research of this valuable compilation, in particular, the esteemed scholar Mr. Abbas Pasandideh and his cooperation in compiling the book.

I would also like to gratefully thank the eminent scholar Hujjatul-Islam Sheikh Muhammad Sharif Mahdavi for supervising the project along with comparing and reviewing the text and Mr. Zaid Alsalami for editing this work and assisting him in this task.

I beseech Allah the Beneficent with His Mercy to bestow upon them all a reward.

“Our Lord! Accept it from us! Indeed You are the All-hearing, the All- knowing.”

Muhammad Muhammadi Rayshahri
20 Jamadi al-Thani, 1430 A.H.
[The Birth Anniversary of Fatimah al-Zahra (s.a.)]
14 June, 2009

1. Qur’an, 25:74.

Part 1

The Foundations of Upbringing a Child

Chapter 2

Introduction

The family is the first main pillar for the raising of a good child. The foundation of the personality of a child is formed in the family environment, and for this reason the child’s rights upon the family are divided into two parts: the rights before the birth of the child and the rights after birth.

Based on this principle, the responsibility of parents towards the child from the viewpoint of Islam begins prior to birth. So, even before the birth, the child has rights upon the parents, and if not observed, the effects of a child’s upbringing and education will decrease.

The recommendations given by the leaders of Islam in this regard are explained in the first section of this book through four chapters.

1- Organising a Meritorious Family

In the first chapter while explaining the value of wanting to have children and the importance of forming a family, emphasis has been put on the fact that the sex of a child is not important, whether being a male or a female. The important thing is the health and merit of a child, and since newborn girls had mostly been treated unkindly, the predecessors of Islam strongly recommended treating them with extra affection and grace.

The Holy Qur’an has clearly said that in the Hereafter the believing children will join their family in Paradise, and thereby families who raise meritorious children are admired and encouraged.

On the contrary, the Islamic traditions have seriously warned against the danger of unworthy children, introducing them as the worst afflictions of a family.

Population Control from the Viewpoint of Islam

Pondering on the above-mentioned, it becomes clear that the purpose of the traditions that encourage Muslims to have more children is to arrange a program for producing as many healthy and righteous children as possible in order to create an exemplary society. In this case, not only does Islam oppose the control of the growth of population, but it supports the increase of the population of a Godly society. However, in the conditions brought about by economical difficulties and cultural corruption where families do not have the ability to raise qualified children, the increase of children is not desirable and there is a need for family planning to control the population.

Therefore, according to the instructions of the leaders of Islam, the Islamic government and the Muslim families are obliged to organise their programs aimed to increase the population based on their economic and cultural abilities. If it is not possible to upbring righteous people and have an increase in population at the same time, it is preferred to prevent polulation growth and give priority to the upbringing of righteous children.

2- The Role of Heredity

The second chapter explains the positive and negative roles of heredity in the development of the personality of the child as mentioned by the leaders of Islam. Accordingly, not only does the child inherit the outside features of its parents, but it also inherits their psychological and innate characteristics (such as bravery, generosity, and good temper).

A noteworthy point is that according to Islamic traditions, the mothers play a greater role than the fathers in this regard. Therefore, those who seek to raise healthy, strong, handsome and righteous children must be more mindful in choosing their wives.

3- The Role of the Parents’ Food

Chapter three explains the role the parents’ food intake has in the future of the child. The most important advice the leaders of Islam have in this regard is warning against the destructive role of consuming unlawful food. The foetus that originates from the consumption of unlawful food will lead to the deviation and aberration of the child. The families who desire happiness for their children must avoid eating prohibited food. Such precautions regarding food must be specifically observed by mothers during their pregnancy, and mothers should not even participate in any feast whose food is doubtful.

Moreover, the consumption of certain kinds of food and fruits is recommended for fathers and mothers prior to the formation of the foetus, throughout the period of pregnancy and after giving birth.

4- The Role of the Method of Copulation

According to Islam, lawful and unlawful sexual relations have a fundamental role in the positive and negative characteristics of a child. From the viewpoint of the Prophet of Islam (s.a.w.), the first Divine bounty given to a person is the legitimacy and purity of birth. Many of the social vices are the results of the transgression of unlawful birth. This does not mean that illegitimately born children can never choose the correct path of life, even though without doubt choosing the correct path is difficult for them.

The fourth chapter of this section mentions the positive effects of legitimacy of birth in the formation of the personality of the child and the warnings against illegitimate births. In addition to this, for the felicity of the future of the children, it is recommended that parents be mindful of this at the time of sexual intercourse. At the end of the chapter, some traditions will be mentioned about the role of the states and particular times of sexual intercourse and its effects in the future of the child.1

1. It must be noted that the authenticity of such narrations is weak; however the weakness of the chain of narrators does not indicate that they have not been issued by the Infallibles (a.s.). Therefore, since these traditions have been quoted in authentic sources, they have been mentioned at the end of this chapter for the awareness of families.

Part 2

Family

1.1: The Forming of a Family

1. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “What is it that prevents a believer from forming a family?! It might be that Allah may grant him some children who will bring value to the earth by [saying] ‘There is no god but Allah’.”1

2. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “The best among my ummah are the married ones, and the unmarried are the worst ones of my ummah.”2

3. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “There is nothing built in Islam more loved by Allah the Exalted than marriage.”3

4. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “Establish a family, as it will increase your sustenance.”4

بِناءُ الأُسرَةِ

.1رسول الله صلى الله عليه وآله: ما يَمنَعُ المُؤمِنَ أَن يَتَّخِذَ أهلًا، لَعَلَّ اللهَ أن يَرزُقَهُ نَسَمةً تُثقِلُ الأَرضَ بِلا إلهَ إلَّا اللهُ.

.2عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: خِيارُ امَّتِي المُتَأَهِّلونَ، و شِرارُ امَّتِي العُزّابُ.

.3عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: ما بُنِيَ بِناءٌ فِي الإِسلامِ أحَبُّ إلَى اللهِ تَعالى مِنَ التَّزويجِ.

.4عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: اتَّخِذُوا الأَهلَ؛ فَإِنَّهُ أَرزَقُ لَكُم.

1.2: Seeking to have a Child

5. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “Seek in wanting and having a child, for it is the source of comfort and the happiness of the heart.”5

6. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “None of you should give up seeking to have a child, for when a person dies without having a child, his name will discontinue.”6

7. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “A house that does not have children does not have blessings.”7

8. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “There is no child born in a family without the family gaining honour they did not previously enjoy.”8

9. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “The scent of a child is a breeze from Paradise.”9

10. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “A child for a father is a sweet-basil from Allah which he smells, and He has distributed it among His worshippers.”10

11. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “A child is the fruit of the heart, and indeed it is the source of fear, envy and sorrow.”11

12. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “Verily, everything has a fruit, and the fruit of one’s heart is his child.”12

13. Musnad Ibn Hanbal, narrating from al-Ash’ath ibn Qays who said: “I went to the Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.) accompanied by the representatives of the tribe of Kindah and he asked me: “Do you have a child?” I answered: “At the time I left home to come to you, a boy was born to me from the daughter of Jadd^13, but I wished that instead of that I could satiate my family.” The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “Never say that, because in children is the comfort of the eye [if they stay alive] and they are the cause of reward if they are taken away. However, if you say that they are the cause of fear and sorrow then yes they are the cause of fear and sorrow.”14

14. Imam al-Sajjad (a.s.) said: “A part of a man’s happiness is having a child who assists him.”15

15. Imam al-Kazim (a.s.) said: “A person is happy when he sees an offspring for himself before his death.”16

16. al-Kafi, narrating from Bakr ibn Salih who wrote to Abu al-Hasan [Imam al-Kazim] (a.s.): “I have been avoiding having a child for five years, and it’s because my wife does not like it and she says that it will be difficult to raise them due to lack of wealth. What is your opinion?” He wrote back: “Seek in having a child, for Allah will provide their sustenance.”17

17. Imam al-Ridha^18 (a.s.) said: “Indeed if Allah the Exalted wishes goodness for a servant, He will not cause him to die until He shows him an offspring.”19

طَلَبُ الوَلَدِ

.5رسول الله صلى الله عليه وآله: اطلُبُوا الوَلَدَ وَ التَمِسوهُ؛ فَإنَّهُ قُرَّةُ العَينِ، و رَيحانَةُ القَلبِ.

.6عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: لا يَدَع أحَدُكُم طَلَبَ الوَلَدِ؛ فَإِنَّ الرَّجُلَ إذا ماتَ و لَيسَ لَهُ وَلَدٌ انقَطَعَ اسمُهُ.

.7عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: بَيتٌ لا صِبيانَ فيهِ لا بَرَكَةَ فيهِ.

.8عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: ما وُلِدَ في أهلِ بَيتٍ غُلامٌ إلّا أصبَحَ فيهِم عِزٌّ لَم يَكُن.

.9عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: ريحُ الوَلَدِ مِن ريحِ الجَنَّةِ.

.10عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: الوَلَدُ للوالِدِ رَيحانَةٌ مِنَ اللهِ يَشَمُّها، (قَسَّمَها) بَينَ عِبادِهِ.

.11عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: الوَلَدُ ثَمَرُ القَلبِ، و إنَّهُ مَجبَنَةٌ مَبخَلَةٌ مَحزَنَةٌ.

.12عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: إنَّ لِكُلِّ شَى‏ءٍ ثَمَرَةً، و ثَمَرَةَ القَلبِ الوَلَدُ.

.13مسند ابن حنبل عن الأشعث ابن قيس: قَدِمتُ عَلى رَسولِ الله صلى الله عليه وآله في وَفدِ كِندَةَ، فَقالَ لي: هَل لَكَ مِن وَلَدٍ؟ قُلتُ: غُلامٌ وُلِدَ لِي في مَخرَجي إلَيكَ مِن ابنَةِ جَدٍّ، و لَوَدِدتُ أنَّ مَكانَهُ شِبعُ القَومِ! قالَ صلى الله عليه وآله: لا تَقولَنَّ ذلِكَ، فَإِنَّ فيهِم قُرَّةَ عَينٍ وأجرا إذا قُبِضوا ثَمَّ، و لَئِن قُلتَ ذاكَ إنَّهُم لَمَجبَنَةٌ مَحزَنَةٌ، إنَّهُم لَمَجبَنَةٌ مَحزَنَةٌ.

.14الإمام زين العابدين عليه السلام: مِن سَعادَةِ الرَّجُلِ أن يَكونَ لَهُ وُلدٌ يَستَعينُ بِهِم.

.15الإمام الكاظم عليه السلام: سَعَدَ امرُؤٌ لَم يَمُت حَتَّى يَرى خَلَفا مِن نَفسِهِ.

.16الكافي عن بكر بن صالح: كَتَبتُ إلى أبِي الحَسَنِ عليه السلام: إنِّي اجتَنَبتُ طَلَبَ الوَلَدِ مُنذُ خَمسِ سِنينَ، و ذلِكَ أنَّ أهلي كَرِهَت ذلِكَ و قالَت: إنَّهُ يَشتَدُّ عَلَيَ تَربِيَتُهُم؛ لِقِلَّةِ الشَّي‏ءِ، فَما تَرى‏؟

فَكَتَبَ عليه السلام إلَيَ: اطلُبِ الوَلَدَ؛ فَإِنَّ اللهَ عزوجل يَرزُقُهُم.

.17الإمام الرضا عليه السلام: إنَّ اللهَ تَبارَكَ وتَعالى‏ إذا أرادَ بِعَبدٍ خَيراً لَم يُمِتهُ حَتّى‏ يُرِيَهُ الخَلَفَ‏ .

1.3: The Virtue of a Righteous Child

18. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “Among the happiness of a man is to have a righteous child.”20

19. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “A righteous child is indeed a flower from the flowers of Paradise.”21

20. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “A righteous child is a flower that Allah has distributed among His creation, and verily my two flowers in this world are Hasan and Husayn. I named them from the names of two children of Bani Isra’il, Shubbar and Shubair.”22 23

21. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “From the blessings of Allah upon a man is that his child looks like him.”24

22. al-Kafi, narrating from Muhammad ibn Sanan, from someone who narrated to him that if ‘Ali ibn al-Husayn [Imam al-Sajjad] (a.s.) was given glad tidings about [the birth of] a child, he did not ask whether it was a boy or a girl rather he would ask: “Is it healthy?” If it was healthy, he would say: “Praise be only to Allah who did not create anything unhealthy from me.”25

23. Imam al-Baqir (a.s.) said: “From among the signs of a man’s happiness is that his son may be similar to him in body, morals and behaviour.”26

فَضلُ الوَلَدِ الصّالِحِ‏

.18رسول الله صلى الله عليه وآله: مِن سَعادَةِ الرَّجُلِ الوَلَدُ الصّالِحُ.

.19عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: إنَّ الوَلَدَ الصّالِحَ رَيحانَةٌ مِن رَياحينِ الجَنَّةِ.

.20عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: الوَلَدُ الصّالِحُ رَيحانَةٌ مِنَ اللهِ قَسَمَها بَينَ عِبادِهِ، وَإِنَّ رَيحانَتَيَ مِنَ الدُّنيا الحَسَنُ والحُسَينُ، سَمَّيتُهُما بِاسمِ سِبطَينِ مِن بَني إسرائِيلَ: شَبَّراً و شَبيراً .

.21عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: مِن نِعمَةِ اللهِ عَلَى الرَّجُلِ أن يُشبِهَهُ وَلَدُهُ.

.22الكافي عن محمّد بن سنان عمّن حدثه: كانَ عَلِيُّ بنُ الحُسَينِ عليه السلام إذا بُشِّرَ بِالوَلَدِ لَم يَسأَل أذَكَرٌ هُوَ أم انثى‏ حَتّى‏ يَقولَ: أسَوِيٌّ؟ فَإن كانَ سَوِيّا قالَ: الحَمدُ للهِ الَّذي لَم يَخلُق مِنِّي شَيئا مُشَوَّهاً.

.23الإمام الباقر عليه السلام: مِن سَعادَةِ الرَّجُلِ أن يَكونَ لَهُ الوَلَدُ يُعرَفُ فيهِ شِبهُهُ، خَلقُهُ وخُلُقُهُ وشَمائِلُهُ.

1.4: The Believers’ Offspring will be with them in Heaven

“The faithful and their offspring who follow them in faith –We will make their offspring join them, and we will not stint anything from [the reward of] their deeds. Every man is a hostage to what he has earned.”27

24. Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) said, regarding Allah’s saying: The faithful and their offspring who follow them in faith –We will make their offspring join them”: “The deeds of the offspring are less than that of their fathers, so the offspring will be join their fathers to comfort them.”28

إلحاقُ ذُرِّيَّةِ المُؤمِنينَ بِهِمْ فِي الجَنَّةِ

وَ الَّذِينَ آمَنُوا وَ اتَّبَعَتْهُمْ ذُرِّيَّتُهُمْ بِإِيمانٍ أَلْحَقْنا بِهِمْ ذُرِّيَّتَهُمْ وَ ما أَلَتْناهُمْ مِنْ عَمَلِهِمْ مِنْ شَيْ‏ءٍ كُلُّ امْرِئٍ بِما كَسَبَ رَهِينٌ

.24الإمام الصادق عليه السلام- في قَولِ اللهِ: (وَ الَّذِينَ آمَنُوا وَ اتَّبَعَتْهُمْ ذُرِّيَّتُهُمْ بِإِيمانٍ أَلْحَقْنا بِهِمْ ذُرِّيَّتَهُمْ)-: قَصَرَتِ الأبناءُ عَن عَمَلِ الآباءِ، فألحَقُوا الأبناءَ بِالآباءِ لِتَقَرَّ بِذلِكَ أعيُنُهُم.

1.5: The Virtue of Tolerating the Troubles of a Child

25. al-Kafi, narrating from Muhammad ibn Muslim who said: “I was sitting in the presence of Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) when Yunus ibn Ya’qub entered and I saw him wailing, so Abu ‘Abdullah [al-Sadiq] (a.s.) asked him: “Why do I see you wailing?”

He said: “Because of my child who disturbed me the whole night.”

Abu ‘Abdullah (a.s.) said to him: “O Yunus! My father Muhammad ibn ‘Ali narrated from his forefathers (a.s.), from my grandfather the Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.) that Gabriel descended onto the Messenger of Allah while he and ‘Ali (a.s.) were upset, and Gabriel said: “O beloved of Allah! Why do I see you upset?”

The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “From two children who have troubled us with their crying.”

Gabriel said: “O Muhammad, be patient, for soon there will be followers sent for this group of people and if one of them weeps, his crying will be like uttering ‘There is no god but Allah’ until he becomes seven years old, and from seven years old on until he reaches puberty, his crying will be seeking forgiveness for his parents, and when he passes his age of puberty, every good deed he performs will be [a reward] for his parents, but any bad act he commits will not affect them.”29

فَضْلُ تَحَمُّلِ أذَى‏ الطِّفْلِ‏

.25الكافي عن محمّد بن مسلم: كُنتُ جالِساً عِندَ أبي عَبدِ اللهِ عليه السلام إذ دَخَلَ يونسُ بنُ يَعقوبَ فَرَأيتُهُ يَئِنُّ، فَقالَ لَهُ أبو عَبدِ اللهِ عليه السلام: ما لي أراكَ تَئِنُّ؟

قالَ: طِفلٌ لي تَأَذَّيتُ بِهِ اللَّيلَ أجمَعَ.

فَقالَ لَهُ أبو عَبدِ اللهِ عليه السلام: يا يونُسُ، حَدَّثَني أبي مُحَمَّدُ بنُ عَلِيّ، عَن آبائِهِ عليهم السلام، عَن جَدّي رَسولِ اللهِ صلى الله عليه وآله أنَّ جَبرَئيلَ نَزَلَ عَلَيهِ و رَسولُ اللهِ وَ عَلِيّ صَلواتُ اللهِ عَلَيهِما يئِنّانِ، فَقالَ جَبرَئيلُ عليه السلام: يا حَبيبَ اللهِ، ما لي أراكَ تَئِنُّ؟

فَقالَ رَسولُ اللهِ صلى الله عليه وآله: طِفلانِ لَنا تَأَذَّينا بِبُكائِهِما فَقالَ جَبرَئيلُ: مَه يا مُحَمَّدُ، فإِنَّهُ سَيُبعَثُ لِهؤلاءِ القَومِ شيعَةٌ إذا بَكى‏ أحَدُهُم فَبُكاؤُهُ «لا إله إِلّا اللهُ» إلى‏ أن يَأتِيَ عَلَيهِ سَبعُ سِنينَ، فَإِذا جازَ السَّبعَ فَبُكاؤُهُ استِغفارٌ لِوالِدَيهِ إلى‏ أن يأتِيَ عَلَى الحَدِّ، فَإِذا جازَ الحَدَّ فَما أتى‏ مِن حَسَنَةٍ فَلِوالِدَيهِ، و ما أتى‏ مِن سَيِّئَةٍ فَلا عَلَيهِما.

1.6: Abundant Children

26. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “Marry a virgin and fertile woman and do not marry a good and beautiful barren, for I will boast of you [your abundance] over other nations on Judgment Day.”30

27. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “Marry a kind and fertile woman, for I will be proud of you [your abundance] over other nations on Judgment Day.”31

28. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “Leave the beautiful and barren and marry the unattractive and fertile, as I will boast of you [your abundance] over other nations on Judgment Day.”32

29. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “Increase your children, for tomorrow I will boast of your abundance over other nations.”33

30. Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) said: “When Yusuf (a.s.) met his brother [Benjamin], he told him: “O brother! How were you able to marry women after [losing] me?”

He said: “My father commanded me, saying: “If you are able to have an offspring who will weigh down the land by glorifying [Allah], then do so.”34

كَثْرَةُ الأَولادِ

.26رسول الله صلى الله عليه وآله: تَزَوَّجوا بِكراً وَلوداً، و لا تَزَوَّجوا حَسناءَ جَميلَةً عاقِراً؛ فَإنِّي اباهي بِكُمُ الامَمَ يَومَ القِيامَةِ.

.27عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: تَزَوَّجُوا الوَدودَ الوَلودَ؛ فَإنّي مُكاثِرٌ بِكُمُ الامَمَ يَومَ القِيامَةِ.

.28عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: دَعُوا الحَسناءَ العاقِرَ، و تَزَوَّجُوا السَّوداءَ الوَلودَ؛ فَإنِّي اكاثِرُ بِكُمُ الامَمَ يَومَ القِيامَةِ.

.29عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: أكثِرُوا الوَلَدَ اكاثِر بِكُمُ الامَمَ غَداً.

.30الإمام الصادق عليه السلام: لَمّا لَقِيَ يوسُفُ أخاهُ قالَ لَهُ: يا أَخي كَيفَ استَطَعتَ أن تَتَزوَّجَ النِّساءَ بَعدي؟

قالَ: إنَّ أبي أمَرَني و قالَ: إنِ استَطَعتَ أن تَكونَ لَكَ ذُرِّيَّةٌ تُثقِلُ الأَرضَ بِالتَّسبيحِ فَافعَل.

1.7: The Virtue of Girls

31. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “From among the goodness of a woman is that her first child is a girl.”35

32. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “The scent of a child is from the scent of Paradise, and no one likes girls other than a believer.”36

33. Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) said: “Sons are bounties and daughters are rewards,37 and Allah asks about the bounties and recompenses for the rewards.”38

فَضلُ البَناتِ‏

.31رسول الله صلى الله عليه وآله: مِن يُمنِ المَرأةِ أن يَكونَ بِكرُها جارِيَةً.

.32عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: ريح الوَلَدِ مِن ريحِ الجَنَّةِ، و لا يُحِبُّ البَناتَ إلّا مُؤمِنٌ.

.33الإمام الصادق عليه السلام: البَنونَ نَعيمٌ، وَ البَناتُ حَسَناتٌ، وَ اللهُ يَسألُ عَنِ النَّعيمِ، و يُثيبُ عَلَى الحَسَناتِ‏ .

1.8: The Reward of Upbringing Girls

34. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “How blessed of a child are girls who are chaste. Whoever has one of them, Allah will appoint her as a cover for him against Hellfire. Whoever has two, Allah will make him enter Paradise because of them, and if he has three, or like them but sisters, the obligation of [recommended] jihad and charity will be removed from him.”39

35. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “Girls are sympathetic, helpful, and blessed. Whoever has one of them, Allah will appoint her as a cover for him against Hellfire. Whoever has two, Allah will make him enter Paradise because of them, and if he has three, or like them but sisters, the obligation of [recommended] jihad and charity will be removed from him.”40

36. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “Whoever raises two girls until they grow up, he and I will enter Paradise like this –putting his (s.a.w.) index and middle fingers together-.”41

37. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “He who raises three daughters until they marry will be veiled by them from Hellfire.”42

ثَوابُ تَربِيَةِ البَناتِ‏

.34رسول الله صلى الله عليه وآله: نِعمَ الوَلَدُ البَناتُ المُخَدَّراتُ، مَن كانَت عِندَهُ واحِدَةٌ جَعَلَهَا اللهُ سِتراً لَهُ مِنَ النّارِ، وَ مَن كانَت عِندَهُ اثنَتانِ أَدخَلَهُ اللهُ بِهِمَا الجَنَّةَ، وَ إِن كُنَّ ثَلاثا أو مِثلَهُنَّ مِنَ الأخَواتِ، وَضَعَ عَنهُ الجِهادَ وَ الصَّدَقَةَ.

.35عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: البَناتُ هُنَّ المُشفِقاتُ المُجَهِّزاتُ المُبارَكاتُ، مَن كانَت لَهُ ابنَةٌ واحِدَةٌ جَعَلَهَا اللهُ لَهُ سِترا مِنَ النّارِ، و مَن كانَت عِندَهُ ابنَتانِ ادخِلَ الجَنَّةَ بِهِما، و مَن كانَت عِندَهُ ثَلاثُ بَناتٍ أو مِثلُهُنَّ مِنَ الأخَواتِ وُضِعَ عَنهُ الجِهادُ وَ الصَّدَقَةُ.

.36عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: مَن عالَ جَارِيَتَينِ حَتَّى‏ تُدرِكا دَخَلتُ الجَنَّةَ أنا وَ هُوَ كَهاتَينِ وَأشارَ بِإصبَعَيهِ السَّبّابَةِ وَالوُسطى‏.

.37عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: مَن عالَ ثَلاثَ بَناتٍ حَتّى يُبنيهُنَّ، كُنَّ لَهُ حِجابا مِنَ النّارِ.

1. 9: Taking Care of Daughters

38. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “He who goes to the market and buys a present and takes it to his family is like one who carries charity to a needy group. He should begin with the females before the males, because whoever makes a female happy is as if he has freed a slave from among the offspring of Isma’il. He who comforts his son is as if he has wept out of reverence of Allah, and he who weeps from revering Allah, Allah will make him enter the blissful Paradise.”43

رِعايَةُ الإِناثِ مِنَ الأولادِ

.38رسول الله صلى الله عليه وآله: مَن دَخَلَ السّوقَ فَاشتَرى‏ تُحفَةً، فحَمَلَها إلى‏ عِيالِهِ، كانَ كَحامِلِ صَدَقَةٍ إلى‏ قَومٍ مَحاويجَ، و ليَبدَأ بِالإِناثِ قَبلَ الذُّكورِ؛ فَإنَّهُ مَن فَرَّحَ انثى‏ فَكَأنَّما عَتَقَ رَقَبَةً مِن وُلدِ اسماعيلَ، و مَن أقَرَّ بِعَينِ ابنٍ فَكَأنَّما بَكى‏ مِن خَشيَةِ اللهِ، وَ مَن بَكى‏ مِن خَشيَةِ اللهِ أدخَلَهُ اللهُ جَنّاتِ النَّعيمِ.

1.10: The Censure of Disliking Girls

39. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “Do not hate girls because they are friendly company and precious.”44

40. Kitab Man la Yahduruhu al-Faqih: “The Prophet (s.a.w.) was informed of the birth of a daughter, and so he looked at the faces of his companions and saw displeasure in them. He said: “What is the matter with you? She is a flower which I smell, and her sustenance is from Allah the Exalted’.”45

41. al-Kafi, narrating from al-Jarud ibn al-Mundhir who said: “Abu ‘Abdullah [al-Sadiq] (a.s.) said to me: “I have been informed that a daughter was born to you and you feel resentful to her. What harm can she bring to you? She is a flower which you smell and you have been guaranteed her sustenance, and the Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.) himself was the father of [a few] daughters.”46

42. al-Kafi, narrating from Ibrahim al-Karkhi from a trustworthy person from among our [Shi’ah] companions who said “I got married in Medina and Abu ‘Abdullah [al-Sadiq] (a.s.) asked me: “How did you find marriage?”

I said: “There is no man that has found any goodness in a woman in the way I saw her, but she betrayed me.”

He asked: “What betrayal was it?”

I answered: “She gave birth to a female.”

He said: “It seems that you hate her. Allah says: “…your parents and your children –you do not know which of them is likelier to be beneficial for you.”47 48

43. Kashf al-Ghummah, narrating from Ayyub ibn Nuh who said: “Yahya ibn Zachariah [his wife] was expecting a child, so he wrote to him [i.e. Imam al-Hadi] (a.s.), saying: “I am expecting a newborn, so please beseech Allah to grant me a son.”

He [the Imam] (a.s.) wrote back to him: “Many a time it is that a daughter is better than a son!” And a daughter was born to him.”49

ذَمُّ كَراهَةِ البَناتِ‏

.39رسول الله صلى الله عليه وآله: لا تَكرَهُوا البَناتِ؛ فَإنَّهُنَّ المُؤنِساتُ الغالِياتُ.

.40كتاب من لا يحضره الفقيه: بُشِّرَ النَّبِيُّ صلى الله عليه وآله بِابنَةٍ فَنَظَرَ في وُجوهِ أصحابِهِ، فَرَاى الكَرَاهَةَ فيهِم، فَقالَ: ما لَكُم؟ رَيحانَةٌ أشَمُّها، وَ رِزقُها عَلَى اللهِ عزوجلِ.

.41الكافي عن الجارود بن المنذر: قالَ لي أبو عَبدِ اللهِ عليه السلام: بَلَغَني أنَّهُ وُلِدَ لَكَ ابنَةٌ فَتَسخَطُها! وَما عَلَيكَ مِنها؟! رَيحانَةٌ تَشَمُّها، وَقَد كُفِيتَ رِزقَها، و قَد كانَ رَسولُ اللهِ صلى الله عليه وآله أبا بَناتٍ.

.42الكافي عن إبراهيم الكرخي عن ثقة حدّثه من أصحابنا: تَزَوَّجتُ بِالمَدينَةِ، فَقالَ لي أبو عَبدِ اللهِ عليه السلام: كَيفَ رَأيتَ؟

قُلتُ: ما رَأى‏ رَجُلٌ مِنْ خَيرٍ في امرَأَةٍ إلّا وَقَد رَأيتُهُ فيها، ولكِن خانَتني!

فَقالَ: وَما هُوَ؟

قُلتُ: وَلَدَت جَارِيَةً.

قالَ: لَعَلَّكَ كَرِهتَها، إنَّ اللهَ عزوجلَ يَقولُ: (آباؤُكُمْ وَ أَبْناؤُكُمْ لا تَدْرُونَ أَيُّهُمْ أَقْرَبُ لَكُمْ نَفْعاً . (

.43كشف الغمّة عن أيُّوب بن نوح: كانَ لِيَحيَى بنِ زَكَرِيّا حَملٌ، فَكَتَبَ إلَيهِ [أي إلَى الإِمامِ الهادي عليه السلام‏]: إنَّ لي حَملًا فَادعُ اللهَ أن يَرزُقَني ابناً.

فَكَتَبَ إلَيهِ: رُبَّ ابنَةٍ خَيرٌ مِن ابنٍ، فَوُلِدَت لَهُ ابنةٌ.

1.11: The Bane of Having a Bad Child

44. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said: “A bad child destroys honour and denigrates the ancestors.”50

45. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said: “A bad child disgraces the ancestors and destroys the offspring.”51

46. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said: “A disobedient child is [the cause of] trouble and misfortune.”52

47. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said: “The worst of calamities is a bad offspring.”53

48. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said: “The worst of children is a disobedient one.”54

49. Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) said: “Beware of doing acts that would make others scorn us, for a father is scorned due to the acts of his bad child.”55

ذَمُّ الوَلَدِ السَّوءِ

44. الإمام عليّ عليه السلام: وَلَدُ السّوءِ يَهدِمُ الشَّرَفَ، وَ يَشينُ السَّلَفَ.

45. عنه عليه السلام: وَلَدُ السّوءِ يَعِرُّ السَّلَفَ، و يُفسِدُ الخَلَفَ.

46. عنه عليه السلام: وَلَدٌ عَقُوقٌ مِحنَةٌ وشُؤمٌ.

47. عنه عليه السلام: أشَدُّ المَصائِبِ سوءُ الخَلَفِ.

48. عنه عليه السلام: شَرُّ الأولادِ العاقُّ.

49. الإمام الصادق عليه السلام: إيّاكُم أن تَعمَلوا عَمَلًا يُعيِّرونا بِهِ، فَإِنَّ وَلَدَ السَّوءِ يُعَيَّرُ والِدُهُ بِعَمَلِهِ.

1.12: Beseeching Allah for a Righteous Family

50. al-Kafi, narrating from Abu Basir: “Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) told me: “If one of you get married, what does he do?”

I said: “I do not know.”

He (a.s.) said: “When a person decides to get married, he should perform two units of prayer, praise Allah, and then say: “O Allah! I wish to get married, so appoint for me from among the women a wife who is the most chaste, the most protective of her self and of my wealth, the most affluent in her sustenance and the greatest among them in blessings. And grant me a pure child that You make to be a righteous successor both in my life and after my death.”56

طَلَبُ الاسْرَةِ الصالِحَةِ مِنَ اللهِ‏

50 . الكافي عن أبي بصير: قالَ لي أبو عَبدِ اللهِ عليه السلام: إذا تَزَوَّجَ أحدُكُم كَيفَ يَصنَعُ؟

قُلتُ: لا أدري.

قالَ: إذا هَمَّ بِذلِكَ فَليُصَلِّ رَكعتَينِ، ويَحمَدِ اللهَ، ثُمَّ يَقولُ: اللَّهُمَّ إنِّي اريدُ أن أتَزَوَّجَ فَقَدِّر لِي مِنَ النِّساءِ أَعَفَّهُنَّ فَرجاً، و أحفَظَهُنَّ لي في نَفسِها و في مالي، وأوسَعَهُنَّ رِزقاً، وأعظَمَهُنَّ بَرَكَةً، و قَدِّر لي وَلَداً طَيِّبا تَجعَلُهُ خَلَفاً صَالِحاً فِي حَياتي وَبَعدَ مَماتِي.

1. Kitab Man la Yahdarhu al-Faqih, vol. 3, p. 382, h. 4340, narrating from Jabir from Imam al-Baqir (a.s.). Makarim al-Akhlaq, vol. 1, p. 429, h. 1454.

2. . Jami’ al-Akhbar, p. 273, h. 748. Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 103, p. 221, h. 32.

3. . Kitab Man la Yahdarhu al-Faqih, vol. 3, p. 383, h. 4343, narrating from ‘Abdullah ibn al-Hakam from Imam al-Baqir (a.s.). Makarim al-Akhlaq, vol. 1, p. 429, h. 1456.

4. . al-Kafi, vol. 5, p. 329, h. 6, narrating from Ibn al-Qaddah from Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) from his father (a.s.). Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 103, p. 217, h. 1.

5. . Makarim al-Akhlaq, vol. 1, p. 480, h. 1665. al-Firdaws, vol. 1, p. 79, h. 242. Both narrating from Ibn ‘Umar.

6. . al-Mu’jam al-Kabir, vol. 23, p. 210, h. 369, narrating from Hafsah. Kanz al-Ummal, vol. 16, p. 281, h. 44469.

7. . al-Firdaws, vol. 5, p. 359, h. 8435, narrating from Ibn ‘Abbas. Kanz al-Ummal, vol. 16, p. 274, h. 44425.

8. . al-Mu’jam al-Awsat, vol. 7, p. 244, h. 7395. Tarikh Isbahan, vol. 2, p. 77, h. 1139. Both narrating from Ibn ‘Umar.

9. . al-Mu’jam al-Awsat, vol. 6, p. 82, h. 5860, narrating from Ibn ‘Abbas. Rawdah al-Wa’izin, p. 403.

10. . ‘Uddah al-Da’i, p. 76. Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 104, p. 98, h. 68.

11. . Musnad Abu Ya’la, vol. 2, p. 10, h. 1028, narrating from Abu Sa’id. Kanz al-Ummal, vol. 16, p. 284, h. 44486.

12. . al-Firdaws, vol. 1, p. 204, h. 779. Kanz al-Ummal, vol. 16, p. 457, h. 45415, narrating from al-Bazzar, with ‘tree’ instead of ‘thing’. Both narrating from Ibn ‘Umar.

13. . In some traditions instead of ‘the daughter of Jadd’, it says ‘the daughter of Jamd’, and he is Jamd ibn Walighah al-Kindi.

14. . Musnad Ibn Hanbal, vol. 8, p. 196, h. 21899. al-Mu’jam al-Kabir, vol. 1, p. 236, h. 646.

15. . al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 2, h. 2. Kitab Man la Yahdarhu al-Faqih, vol. 3, p. 164, h. 3598.

16. . al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 4, h. 3. ‘Uyun Akhbar al-Ridha (a.s.), vol. 1, p. 480, h. 22.

17. . al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 3, h. 7. Makarim al-Akhlaq, vol. 1, p. 480, h. 1664.

18. . In Kitab Man la Yahdarhu al-Faqih this tradition is recorded from Abu al-Hasan (a.s.) with no mentioning of another name, but in Makarim al-Akhlaq it mentions the same tradition and ascribes it to Imam al-Ridha (a.s.).

19. . Kitab Man la Yahdarhu al-Faqih, vol. 3, p. 481, h. 4690. Makarim al-Akhlaq, vol. 1, p. 472, h. 1615.

20. . al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 3, h. 11, narrating from al-Sakuni from Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.), and h. 6. ‘Uddah al-Da’i, p. 76.

21. . al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 3, h. 10, narrating from al-Sakuni from Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.). Kitab Man la Yahdarhu al-Faqih, vol. 3, p. 481, h. 4688.

22. . Shabbar and Shabbir are the names of Aaron’s children and they were two names which Gabriel brought for the Prophet of Allah, and their Arabic equivalent is Hasan and Husayn. Tarikh Dimashq, vol. 14, p. 119, h. 4313. Kashf al-Ghummah, vol. 2, p. 151.

23. . al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 2, h. 1, narrating from al-Sakuni from Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.).

24. . al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 4, h. 1, narrating from al-Sakuni from Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.). Kitab Man la Yahdurhu al-Faqih, vol. 3, p. 484, h. 4708. Makarim al-Akhlaq, vol. 1, p. 477, h. 1645.

25. . al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 21, h. 1. Tahdhib al-Ahkam, vol. 7, p. 439, h. 1754.

26. . al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 4, h. 2, narrating from Sadir. Makarim al-Akhlaq, vol. 1, p. 477, h. 1644, narrating from Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.).

27. . Qur’an, 52:21.

28. . al-Kafi, vol. 3, p. 249, h. 5, narrating from Ibn Bakir. al-Tawhid, p. 394, h. 7, narrating from Abu Bakr al-Hadrami.

29. . al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 52, h. 5. ‘Awali al-La’ali, vol. 3, p. 284, h. 23.

30. . al-Kafi, vol. 5, p. 333, h. 2, narrating from Muhammad ibn Muslim from Imam al-Baqir (a.s.).

31. . Tarikh Baghdad, vol. 12, p. 375, h. 6829, narrating from Ibn ‘Umar. Kanz al-Ummal, vol. 16, p. 302, h. 44598, narrating from ‘Umar.

32. . al-Musannif, by ‘Abd al-Razzaq, vol. 6, p. 160, h. 10343, narrating from Ibn Sirin. Kanz al-Ummal, vol. 16, p. 293, h. 44545, narrating from al-Tirmidhi.

33. . al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 2, h. 3, narrating from Muhammad ibn Muslim from Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.). al-Khisal, p. 615, with ‘seek’ instead of ‘increase’.

34. . al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 2, h. 4, narrating from ‘Abdullah ibn Sinan. ‘Awali al-La’ali, vol. 3, p. 288, h. 36, without mentioning the chain of narrators to the Infallible (a.s.).

35. . al-Ja’fariyat, p. 99, narrating from al-Imam al-Kazim (a.s.) from his forefathers (a.s.). al-Nawadir, by al-Rawandi, p. 151, h. 220.

36. . al-Firdaws, vol. 2, p. 272, h. 3263, narrating from ‘A’ishah.

37. . Meaning that having daughters is an act of worship that will be rewarded for.

38. . al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 7, h. 12, narrating from Ahmad bin al-Fadl.

39. . Makarim al-Akhlaq, vol. 1, p. 472, h. 1613. Rawdah al-Wa’izin, p. 404.

40. . Kanz al-Ummal, vol. 16, p. 454, h. 45399, narrating from al-Dailami from ‘Anas.

41. . al-Mustadrak ‘ala al-Sahihain, vol. 4, p. 196, h. 7350. al-Adab al-Mufrad, p. 264, h. 894. Both narrating from ‘Anas. Jami’ al-Akhbar, 285, h. 766, narrating from ‘Anas.

42. . Tarikh Baghdad, vol. 8, p. 316, narrating from ‘Anas. Kanz al-Ummal, vol. 16, p. 451, h. 45385.

43. . Thawab al-A’mal, p. 239. al-Amali, by al-Saduq, p. 672, h. 904. Both narrating from Ibn ‘Abbas.

44. . Musnad Ibn Hanbal, vol. 6, p. 134, h. 17378. al-Mu’jam al-Kabir, vol. 17, p. 310, h. 865, narrating from ‘Aqbah ibn ‘Amir. Kanz al-Ummal, vol. 16, p. 449, h. 45374.

45. . Kitab Man la Yahdarhu al-Faqih, vol. 3, p. 481, h. 4693. Thawab al-A’mal, p. 239, h. 2, with ‘of Fatimah’ instead of ‘of a daughter’.

46. . al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 6, h. 9.

47. . Qur’an, 4:11.

48. . al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 4, h. 1.

49. . Kashf al-Ghummah, vol. 3, p. 175. Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 50, p. 177.

50. . Ghurar al-Hikam, h. 10065.

51. . Ghurar al-Hikam, h. 10066. ‘Uyun al-Hikam wa al-Mawa’iz, p. 503, h. 9224, with ‘harms’ instead of ‘disgraces’.

52. . Ghurar al-Hikam, h. 10072. ‘Uyun al-Hikam wa al-Mawa’iz, p. 504, h. 9247.

53. . Ghurar al-Hikam, h. 2963.

54. . Ghurar al-Hikam, h. 5688.

55. . al-Kafi, vol. 2, p. 219, h. 11, narrating from Hashim al-Kindi.

56. . al-Kafi, vol. 3, p. 481, h. 2. Kitab Man la Yahdarhu al-Faqih, vol. 3, p. 394, h. 4387, with ‘ordain’ instead of ‘grant’.

Part 3

Heredity

2.1: Blood is Contagious

51. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “Look into what the origin of the womb is that you are going to put your child in, as indeed blood^1 is contagious.”2

52. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “People are [like] minerals; and blood is contagious and having bad manners is like a bad origin.”3

53. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “Marry from a righteous family because indeed blood is contagious.”4

54. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “Choose [the womb] for your sperm, for indeed women bear children that are similar to their brothers and sisters.”5

55. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said: “Beware of marrying a fool, for her companionship is disaster and her children are a loss.”6

56. Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) said: “There are three things incumbent on the father for the child: to choose a good mother for him, to give him a good name, and to do his best in training him.”7

العِرْقُ دَسَّاسٌ‏

51. رسول الله صلى الله عليه وآله‏ انظُر في أيّ نِصابٍ‏ تَضَعُ وَلَدَكَ؛ فَإِنَّ العِرقَ دَسَّاسٌ‏ .

52. عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: النّاسُ مَعادِنُ، وَ العِرقُ دَسّاسٌ، وأدَبُ السّوءِ كَعِرقِ السّوءِ.

53. عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: تَزَوَّجُوا في الحِجرِ الصّالِحِ؛ فَإِنَّ العِرقَ دَسّاسٌ.

54. عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: تَخَيَّروا لِنُطَفِكُم؛ فَإِنَّ النِّساءَ يَلِدنَ أشباهَ إخوانِهِنَّ وأخَواتِهِنَّ.

55. الإمام عليّ عليه السلام: إيّاكُم و تَزويجَ الحَمقاءِ؛ فَإِنَّ صُحبَتَها بَلاءٌ، و وُلدَها ضَياعٌ.

56. الإمام الصادق عليه السلام: تَجِبُ لِلوَلَدِ عَلى‏ والِدِهِ ثَلاثُ خِصالٍ: اختِيارُهُ لِوالِدَتِهِ، و تَحسينُ اسمِهِ، وَ المُبالَغَةُ في تَأديبِهِ.

2.2: The Role of Heredity in the Creation of a Child

57. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said: “A man from the Ansar came to the Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.) and said: “O Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.)! This is my uncle’s daughter, and I am so and so, son of so and so –until he mentioned up to ten of his forefathers-, and she is so and so, daughter of so and so –also mentioning up to ten of her forefathers-, and there is no black person in my ancestors nor in her ancestors, but she has given birth to a black child!”

The Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.) cast down his head for a long while, and then he raised his head and said: “Verily, you have ninety nine blood-veins [genes] and she also has ninety nine blood-veins. When you copulate with her, the blood-veins will move and every blood-vein asks Allah Almighty for the child should be similar to it. Stand up, as it is indeed your child and it did not come other than from either a blood-vein from you or from her.” He [Imam ‘Ali] (a.s.) said: “The man stood up and took the hand of his wife and his happiness with his wife and child increased.”8

58. Imam al-Baqir (a.s.) said: “One of the Companions of the Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.) came to him and said: “This is my uncle’s daughter and my wife. I know nothing but good about her. She has given birth to a child from me and is extremely black with large nostrils, fuzzy hair and a flat nose. I know similar to him neither among my uncles nor my ancestors.

He (s.a.w.) asked the man’s wife: “What do you have to say?” She answered: “No, by He who has appointed you as a prophet in truth, I have never been with anyone else since he has taken me.”

The Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.) cast down his head for a long while then he looked up at the sky, and then he turned to the man and said: “O man! There is no one that does not have between him and Adam ninety nine blood-veins [genes], and all of them effect in the descendents. When the sperm arrives into the womb, the blood-veins start to move, and they ask Allah that the child be similar to them. Therefore, this is one of the roots that neither your ancestors nor the ancestors of your ancestors have conceived. Take your child.’

The woman said: “O Messenger of Allah! You have solved my problem!”9

59. Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) said: “Verily Allah has created four containers for the womb. Whatever [sperm] comes into the first container is for the father, whatever comes into the second is for the mother, whatever comes into the third is for paternal uncles, and whatever comes into the fourth is for the maternal uncles.”10

60. Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) said: “When Allah the Exalted, the High, wishes to create someone, He gathers all the features between that person and up to [the time of] Adam, then He creates him on the feature of one of them. Therefore, no one should say about their child: “This child is neither similar to me or to any of my ancestors.”11

دَوْرُ الوِرَاثَةِ في خَلقِ المَولودِ

57. الإمام عليّ عليه السلام: أقبَلَ رَجُلٌ مِنَ الأنصارِ إلى‏ رَسولِ الله صلى الله عليه وآله فَقالَ: يا رَسولَ اللهِ، هذِهِ بِنتُ عَمِّي، و أَنَا فُلانُ ابنُ فُلانٍ، حَتّى‏ عَدَّ عَشَرَةَ آباءٍ، و هِيَ فُلانَةُ بِنتُ فُلانٍ حَتّى‏ عَدَّ عَشَرَةَ آباءٍ، لَيسَ في حَسَبي ولا حَسَبِها حَبَشِيٌّ، و إنَّها وَضَعَت هذَا الحَبَشِيَّ!

فَأطرَقَ رَسولُ اللهِ صلى الله عليه وآله طَويلًا، ثُمَّ رَفَعَ رَأسَهُ فَقالَ: إنَّ لَكَ تِسعَةً وَ تِسعينَ عِرقاً، و لَها تِسعَةً وَ تِسعينَ عِرقاً، فَإِذَا اشتَمَلتَ اضطَرَبَتِ العُروقُ، و سَألَ اللهَ عزوجل كُلُّ عِرقٍ مِنها أن يُذهِبَ الشَّبَهَ إلَيهِ، قُم فَإِنَّهُ وَلَدُكَ، و لَم يَأتِكَ إلّا مِن عِرقٍ مِنكَ أو عِرقٍ مِنها.

قالَ: فَقامَ الرَّجُلُ و أخَذَ بِيَدِ امرَأَتِهِ، و ازدادَ بِها و بِوَلَدِها عُجباً.

58. الإمام الباقر عليه السلام: أتى‏ رَجُلٌ مِنَ الأنصارِ رَسولَ اللهِ صلى الله عليه وآله، فَقالَ: هذهِ ابنَةُ عَمِّي وامرَأتي لا أعلَمُ إلّا خَيراً، وَ قَد أتَتني بِوَلَدٍ شَديدِ السَّوادِ، مُنتَشِرِ المِنخِرَينِ، جَعدٍ، قَطَطٍ، أفطَسِ‏ الأنفِ، لا أعرِفُ شِبهَهُ في أخوالي ولا في أجدادي!

قال: فَنَكَسَ رَسولُ اللهِ بِرَأسِهِ مَلِيّاً، ثُمَّ رَفَعَ بَصَرَهُ إلَى السَّماءِ، ثُمَّ أقبَلَ عَلَى الرَّجُلِ فَقالَ: يا هذا، إنَّهُ لَيسَ مِن أحَدٍ إلّا بَينَهُ و بَينَ آدمَ تِسعَةٌ و تِسعونَ عِرقاً، كُلُّها تَضرِبُ فِي النَّسَبِ، فَإِذا وَقَعَتِ النُّطفَةُ فِي الرَّحِمِ اضطَربَت تِلكَ العُروقُ؛ تَسأَلُ اللهَ الشُّبهَةَ لَها، فَهذا مِن تِلكَ العُروقِ الَّتي لَم يُدرِكها أجدادُكَ و لا أجدادُ أجدادِكَ، خُذ إلَيكَ ابنَكَ. فَقالَتِ المَرأَةُ: فَرَّجتَ عَنّي يا رَسُولَ اللهِ.

59. الإمام الصادق عليه السلام: إنَّ اللهَ عزوجل خَلَقَ لِلرَّحِمِ أربَعَةَ أوعِيَةٍ، فَما كانَ فِي الأوَّلِ فَلِلأبِ، وما كانَ فِي الثّاني فَلِلُامِّ، و ما كانَ فِي الثّالِثِ فَلِلعُمومَةِ، وَ ما كانَ فِي الرّابِعِ فَلِلخُؤُولَةِ.

60. عنه عليه السلام: إنَّ اللهَ تبارَكَ وتعالى‏ إذا أرادَ أن يَخلُقَ خَلقاً جَمَعَ كُلَّ صورَةٍ بَينَهُ و بَينَ آدَمَ، ثُمَّ خَلَقَهُ عَلى‏ صُورَةِ إحداهُنَّ، فَلا يَقولَنَّ أحَدٌ لِوَلَدِهِ: هذا لا يُشبِهُني ولا يُشبِهُ شَيئاً مِن آبائي. فَقالَ لِامرَأَتِهِ: ما تَقولينَ؟ قالَت: لا وَ الّذي بَعَثَكَ بِالحَقِّ نَبِيّاً، ما أقعَدتُ مَقعَدَهُ مِنّي مُنذُ مَلَكَني أحَداً غَيرَهُ.

2.3: The Role of Heredity in the Behaviour of a Child

61. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said: “Good morals is an indication of the nobility of the blood-veins.”12

62. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said: “When the origin of a person is noble, his behaviour is noble in both his absence or in his presence.”13

63. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said: “Seek your needs from noble people who have good principles, as your needs will be better fulfilled by them and doing so is more pleasant for you.”14

64. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said: “Seek your needs from people who are noble and have principles. It is with them that the need is fulfilled promptly and without obligation.”15

65. Muruj al-Dhahab, in mentioning Muhammad ibn al-Hanafiyyah in the crisis of the Battle of the Camel when he stood there facing the spears and arrows: “Then Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) came towards him and hit him with the sheath of his sword and said: “A blood from your mother has affected you [your fear is from your mother’s side].”16

66. Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) said, in Ziyarah al-Arba’in^17: “May my father and my mother be sacrificed for you, O son of the Messenger of Allah! I bear witness that you were a light in the noble loins and pure wombs. Never did the impurities of the Age of Ignorance pollute you, and never did it cover you with its contaminations.”18

67. Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) said: “The Prophet of Allah delivered a sermon in which he said: “O people! Beware of a nice plant growing in waste.” He was asked: “O Messenger of Allah! What is a nice plant growing in waste?” He answered: “A beautiful woman brought up in a bad family.”19

دَوْرُ الوِرَاثَةِ في خُلُقِ المَوْلودِ

61. الإمام عليّ عليه السلام: حُسنُ الأخلاقِ بُرهانُ كَرَمِ الأَعراقِ.

62. عنه عليه السلام: إذا كَرُمَ أصلُ الرَّجُلِ كَرُمَ مَغيبُهُ و مَحضَرُهُ.

63. عنه عليه السلام: عَلَيكُم في طَلَبِ الحَوائِجِ بِشِرافِ النُّفوسِ، ذَوي الاصولِ الطَّيِّبَةِ؛ فَإِنَّها عِندَهُم أقضَى‏، و هِيَ لَدَيكُم أَزْكى‏.

64. عنه عليه السلام: عَلَيكُم في قَضاءِ حَوائِجِكُم بِكِرامِ الأنفُسِ و الاصولِ، تُنجَح لَكُم عِندَهُم مِن غَيرِ مِطالٍ و لا مَنٍّ.

65. مروج الذهب- في ذِكرِ مُحَمَّدِ بنِ الحَنَفِيَّةِ في أزمَةِ حَربِ الجَمَلِ لَمّا وَقَفَ حينَ واجَهَتهُ الرِّماحُ والنُّشّابُ-: فَأَتاهُ عَلِيٌ عليه السلام: فَضَرَبَهُ بِقائِمِ سَيفِهِ وقالَ: أَدرَكَكَ عِرقٌ مِن امِّكَ.

66. الإمام الصادق عليه السلام- في زِيارَةِ الأَربَعينَ‏ بِأَبي أنتَ و امِّي يَا ابنَ رَسولِ اللهِ، أشهَدُ أنَّكَ كُنتَ نُوراً فِي الأصلابِ الشّامِخَةِ وَ الأرحامِ الطّاهِرَةِ، لَم تُنَجِّسكَ الجاهِلِيَّةُ بِأنجاسِها، و لَم تُلبِسكَ المُدلَهِمَّاتِ‏ مِن ثِيابِها.

67. عنه عليه السلام: قامَ رَسولُ الله صلى الله عليه وآله خَطيباً فَقالَ: أيُّهَا النّاسُ، إيّاكُم و خَضراءَ الدِّمَنِ. قيلَ: يا رَسولَ اللهِ، و ما خَضراءُ الدِّمَنِ؟ قالَ: المَرأَةُ الحَسناءُ في مَنبَتِ السَّوءِ.

2.4: The Role of Marrying Relatives

68. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “Marry those foreign to your family [non- relatives] so that you do not give birth to weak children.”20

69. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “Do not marry close relatives, as the child will come out weak.”21

دوْرُ زَواجِ الأقارِبِ‏

68. رسول الله صلى الله عليه وآله: اغتَرِبوا؛ لا تُضووا .

69. عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: لا تَنكِحُوا القَرابَةَ القَريبَةَ؛ فَإِنَّ الوَلَدَ يُخلَقُ ضاوِياً.

1. The Arabic word ‘irq literally means a blood-vein, but in these traditions it refers to the genetical influence. In the modern context it could be known as genes. [Ed.].

2. . Musnad al-Shihab, vol. 1, p. 371, h. 638. Kanz al-Ummal, vol. 15, p. 855, h. 43400, narrating from al-Dailami. Both narrating from Ibn ‘Umar.

3. . Shu’ab al-Iman, vol. 7, p. 455, h. 10974. al-Firdaws, vol. 4, p. 299, h. 6878. Both narrating from Ibn ‘Abbas. Kanz al-Ummal, vol. 3, p. 442, h. 7360.

4. . al-Firdaws, vol. 2, p. 51, 2291 & Kanz al-Ummal, vol. 16, p. 296, h. 44559. Makarim al-Akhlaq, vol. 1, p. 432, h. 1474, narrating from Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.).

5. . Tarikh Dimashq, vol. 52, p. 362, h. 11068, narrating from ‘A’ishah. Kashf al-Khafa’, vol. 2, p. 339, h. 2917.

6. . al-Kafi, vol. 5, p. 353, h. 1. Tahdhib al-Ahkam, vol. 7, p. 406, h. 31. Both narrating from al-Sakuni from Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.).

7. . Tuhaf al-’Uqul, p. 322. Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 78, p. 236, h. 67.

8. . Ja’fariyat, p. 90. al-Nawadir, p. 178, h. 297. Both narrating from Imam al-Kazim (a.s.) from his forefathers (a.s.).

9. . al-Kafi, vol. 5, p. 561, h. 23.’Awali al-La’ali, vol. 3, p. 418, h. 21.

10. . al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 17, h. 2. ‘Awali al-La’ali, vol. 3, p. 419, h. 22. Both narrating from Muhammad ibn Hamran.

11. . Kitab Man la Yahdarhu al-Faqih, vol. 3, p. 484, h. 4709. ‘Ilal al-Shara’i’, p. 103, h. 1.

12. . Ghurar al-Hikam, h. 4855. ‘Uyun al-Hikam wa al-Mawa’iz, p. 228, h. 4397.

13. . Ghurar al-Hikam, h. 4163. ‘Uyun al-Hikam wa al-Mawa’iz, p. 131, h. 2958, with ‘family’ instead of ‘origin’.

14. . Ghurar al-Hikam, h. 6162.15. . Ghurar al-Hikam, h. 6158.

16. . Muruj al-Dhahab, vol. 2, p. 375. Sharh Nahj al-Balaghah, vol. 1, p. 243.

17. . The visitation recited on the fortieth day after the martyrdom of Imam Husayn (a.s.) (20th of Safar). [Ed.].

18. . Tahdhib al-Ahkam, vol. 6, p. 114, h. 201, narrating from Safwan ibn Mahran al-Jammal.

19. . al-Kafi, vol. 5, p. 332, h. 4. Tahdhib al-Ahkam, vol. 7, p. 403, h. 160. Both narrating from al-Sakuni. Kitab Man la Yahdarhu al-Faqih, vol. 3, p. 391, h. 4377. Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 103, p. 232, h. 10, narrating from Ma’ani al-Akhbar from Muhammad ibn Abu Talhah.

20. . al-Mujazat al-Nabawiyah, p. 92, h. 59.

21. . al-Mahajjah al-Bayda, vol. 3, p. 94.

Part 4

The Food of the Parents

3.1: The Role of Unlawful Food in a Newborn

70. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “O son of Mas’ud! Do not consume what is unlawful, do not wear what is unlawful, do not take an unlawful relationship, and do not disobey Allah, as indeed Allah the Exalted says to Iblis: “Instigate whomever of them you can with your voice; and rally against them your cavalry and your infantry, and share with them in wealth and children and make promises to them! But Satan promises them nothing but delusion.”1 2

71. Tafsir al-’Ayyashi, narrating from Muhammad ibn Muslim who said: “I asked Imam al-Baqir (a.s.) about Satan’s share in His saying: “and share with them in wealth and children.”3 He (a.s.) said: “Anything that comes from unlawful wealth is the share of Satan.” He (a.s.) then said: “And he [Satan] stays with the man until he has intercourse, and the child will be from the sperm of Satan and the sperm of the man if his wealth is from the unlawful.”4

72. Tafsir al-’Ayyashi, narrating from Muhammad from Imam al-Baqir (a.s.) or Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) who said: ‘The share of Satan is what is produced from unlawful wealth, and the child is born from the partnership of Satan.

He [Satan] will accompany the man until he has intercourse, and so his semen will be mixed with the man’s semen if the wealth consumed was unlawful. He said: “Both [their semen] will be mixed together.” And he said: “The child might be created from the semen of one, or it might be created from both.”5

73. Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) said: “[The effects of] Unlawful income will be seen in one’s offspring.”6

دَوْرُ طَعامِ الحَرامِ فِي المَوْلودِ

70. رسول الله صلى الله عليه وآله: يَا ابنَ مَسعودٍ: لا تَأكُلِ الحَرامَ، و لا تَلبَسِ الحَرامَ، و لا تَأخُذ مِنَ الحَرامِ، و لا تَعصِ اللهَ؛ لِأَنَّ اللهَ تَعالى‏ يَقولُ لِإِبليسَ: (وَ اسْتَفْزِزْ مَنِ اسْتَطَعْتَ مِنْهُمْ بِصَوْتِكَ وَ أَجْلِبْ عَلَيْهِمْ بِخَيْلِكَ وَ رَجِلِكَ وَ شارِكْهُمْ فِي الْأَمْوالِ وَ الْأَوْلادِ وَ عِدْهُمْ وَ ما يَعِدُهُمُ الشَّيْطانُ إِلَّا غُرُوراً .

71. تفسير العيّاشي عن محمّد بن مسلم عن الإمام الباقر عليه السلام، قال: سَأَلتُهُ عَن شِركِ الشَّيطانِ؛ قَولِهِ: (وَ شارِكْهُمْ فِي الْأَمْوالِ وَ الْأَوْلادِ)، قالَ: ما كانَ مِن مالٍ حَرامٍ فَهُوَ شَريكُ الشَّيطانِ.

قالَ: و يَكونُ مَعَ الرَّجُلِ حَتّى‏ يُجامِعَ، فَيَكونَ مِن نُطفَتِهِ وَنُطفَةِ الرَّجُل إذا كانَ حَراماً.

72. تفسير العيّاشي عن محمّد عن أحدهما عليهما السلام: شِركُ الشَّيطانِ ما كانَ مِن مالٍ حَرامٍ فَهُوَ مِن شِركَةِ الشَّيطان، و يَكونُ مَعَ الرَّجُلِ حِينَ يُجامِعُ، فَيَكونُ نُطفَتُهُ مَعَ نُطفَتِهِ‏ إذا كانَ حَراماً، قالَ: كِلتَيهِما جَميعاً مُختَلِطَينِ، و قالَ: رُبَّما خُلِقَ مِن واحِدَةٍ، و رُبَّما خُلِقَ مِنهُما جَميعاً.

73. الإمام الصادق عليه السلام: كَسبُ الحَرام يَبينُ فِي الذُّريَّةِ.

3.2: The Role of the Father’s Food in his Child

74. Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) said: “Whoever eats a quince before breakfast, his semen will be clean and his child will be good.”7

75. Tibb al-A’immah, narrating from Bukair ibn Muhammad who said: “I was in the presence of Abu ‘Abdullah al-Sadiq (a.s.) when someone said: “O son of the Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.)! [Sometimes] A child is born but he is rather foolish and weak.”

He (a.s.) said: “What has prevented you from eating Sawiq?8 Both you and your wife should eat it, for it causes flesh to grow, the bone to strengthen and only the strong will be born from you.”9

76. Imam al-Kazim (a.s.) said: “He who eats egg, onion and [olive] oil will increase his sexual potency. He who eats meat mixed with eggs will result in his child’s bones being strong.”10

77. al-Kafi, narrating from ‘Amr ibn Ibrahim from al-Khurasani 11 who said: “Eating a sweet pomegranate increases a man’s semen and makes the child beautiful.”12

دَوْرُ غِذاءِ الوالِدِ فِي الوَلَد

74. الإمام الصادق عليه السلام: مَن أكَلَ سَفَرجَلَةً عَلَى الرِّيقِ طابَ ماؤُهُ، و حَسُنَ وَلَدُهُ.

75. طبّ الأئمّة عن بكير بن محمّد: كُنتُ عِندَ أبي عَبدِ اللهِ الصّادِقِ عليه السلام فَقالَ لَهُ رَجُلٌ: يَا ابنَ رَسولِ اللهِ، يولَدُ الوَلَدُ فَيَكونُ فِيهِ البَلَهُ و الضَّعفُ؟

فَقالَ: ما يَمنَعُكَ مِنَ السَّويقِ؟ اشرَبهُ وَمُر أهلَكَ بِهِ؛ فَإِنَّهُ يُنبِتُ اللَّحمَ، ويَشُدُّ العَظمَ، ولا يولَدُ لَكُم إلّا القَوِيُ.

76. الإمام الكاظم عليه السلام: مَن أكَلَ البَيضَ و البَصَلَ وَ الزَّيتَ زادَ في جُماعِهِ، ومَن أكَلَ اللّحمَ بِالبَيضِ كَبُرَ عَظمُ وَلَدِهِ.

77. الكافي عن عمرو بن إبراهيم عن الخراساني: أكلُ الرُّمّانِ الحُلوِ يَزيدُ في ماءِ الرَّجُلِ و يُحَسِّنُ الوَلَدَ.

3.3: The Role of a Pregnant Woman’s Food on the Foetus

78. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “Feed dates to a woman who is in her month of delivery, for her child will become patient and clean.”13

79. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “Feed frankincense to your pregnant women, for when a child is fed with frankincense while in its mother’s womb, its heart will be strengthened and its intellect will increase. If it is a male, he will become brave, and if it is female, her posteriors will grow large and it will be liked by her husband.”14

80. Imam al-Ridha (a.s.) said: “Give wet frankincense to your pregnant women, for if she caries a male in her womb, he will be born with a strong heart, be knowledgeable and brave; and if it is a female, she will beautiful, have good morals, her posteriors will be large and her husband will be pleased with her.”15

81. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “Give frankincense to your pregnant women, for it will increase in the child’s intellect.”16

82. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “There is no pregnant woman who eats melon with cheese without her child not being born with a beautiful face and good morals.”17

83. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “Give quince to your pregnant women, for it will make your children have good morals.”18

84. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “The smell of prophets is the scent of quince, the smell of Houris is the pleasant scent of the ‘As tree, the smell of angels is the scent of a rose, and the smell of my daughter Fatimah al-Zahra (a.s.) is the scent of quince, the ‘As tree and a rose. Allah did not send a prophet or a successor that did not have the smell of quince, so eat it and feed it to your pregnant women, for it makes your children beautiful.”19

85. Makarim al-Akhlaq, narrating from the Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.) who said: “Eat quince and give it to each other as a gift, for it brightens the eyesight and grows friendship in the heart, and feed it to your pregnant women, for it makes your children beautiful.”

In another tradition: “It [quince] will make your children have good morals.”20

86. Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) said, while looking at a handsome boy: “The father of this boy must have eaten quince.”21

87. Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) said: “Eat endive, for it increases a man’s semen and makes a child handsome. Its nature is hot, it is a laxative and it increases the masculinity of a child.”22

88. al-Kafi, narrating from Sharhabil ibn Muslim who said: “He (a.s.) said concerning a pregnant woman: “She should eat quince, for it will give a nicer scent to her child and a better colour.”23

دَوْرُ غِذاءِ الحامِلِ فِي الجَنينِ‏

78. رسول الله صلى الله عليه وآله: أطعِمُوا المَرأةَ فِي شَهرِها الَّذي تَلِدُ فيهِ التَّمرَ؛ فَإنَّ وَلَدَها يَكونُ حَليماً نَقِيّاً.

79. عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: أطعِموا حَبالاكُمُ اللُّبانَ؛ فَإِنَّ الصَّبِيَّ إذا غُذِّيَ في بَطنِ امِّهِ بِاللُّبانِ‏ اشتَدَّ قَلبُهُ، وَ زِيدَ في عَقلِهِ، فَإِن يَكُ ذَكَراً كانَ شُجاعَاً … .

80. الإمام الرضا عليه السلام: أطعِمُوا حَبالاكُم ذَكَرَ اللُّبان، فَإِن يَكُ في بَطنِها غُلامٌ خَرَجَ ذَكِيَّ القَلبِ، عَالِماً، شُجاعاً، و إن تَكُ جارِيَةً حَسُنَ خَلقُها و خُلُقُها و … .

81. رسول الله صلى الله عليه وآله: أطعِموا نِساءَكُم الحَوامِلَ اللُّبانَ؛ فَإنَّهُ يَزيدُ في عَقلِ الصَّبِيّ.

82. عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: ما مِن امرَأَةٍ حامِلَةٍ أكَلَت البِطِّيخَ بِالجُبنِ إلّا يَكونُ مَولودُها حَسَنَ الوَجهِ و الخُلُقِ.

83. عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: أَطعِموا حَبالاكُمُ السَّفَرجَلَ؛ فَإِنَّه يُحَسِّنُ أخلاقَ أولادِكُم.

84. عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: رائِحَةُ الأَنبِياءِ عليهم السلام رائِحَةُ السَّفَرجَلِ، و رائِحَةُ الحورِ العينِ رائِحَةُ الآسِ‏ ، و رائِحَةُ المَلائِكَةِ رائِحَةُ الوَردِ، و رائِحَةُ ابنَتي فاطِمَةَ الزَّهراءِ عليها السلام رائِحَةُ السَّفَرجَلِ وَ الآسِ وَ الوَردِ، و لا بَعَثَ اللهُ نَبِيّاً و لا وَصِيّاً إلّا وُجِدَ مِنهُ رائِحَةُ السَّفَرجَلِ؛ فَكُلوها، وَأَطعِمُوا حَبالاكُم؛ يَحسُنَ أولادُكُم.

85. مكارم الأخلاق عن رسول الله صلى الله عليه وآله: كُلُوا السَّفرجَلَ و تَهادَوهُ بَينَكُم؛ فَإِنَّهُ يَجلُو البَصَرَ، و يُنبِتُ المَوَدَّةَ فِي القَلبِ، وأطعِموهُ حَبالاكُم؛ فَإِنَّهُ يُحَسِّنُ أولادَكُم.

وفي رواية: يُحَسِّنُ أخلاقَ أولادِكُم.

86. الإمام الصادق عليه السلام- لَمّا نَظَرَ إلى غُلامٍ جَميلٍ‏ يَنبَغي أن يَكونَ أبو هذَا الغُلامِ أكَلَ السَّفَرجَلَ.

87. عنه عليه السلام: عَلَيكَ بالهِندَباءِ؛ فَإِنَّهُ يَزيدُ فِي الماءِ، وَ يُحَسِّنُ الوَلَدَ، و هُوَ حارٌّ لَيِّنٌ، يَزيدُ فِي الوَلَدِ الذُّكورَةَ.

88. الكافي عن شرحبيل بن مسلم: أنَّهُ‏ قالَ فِي المَرأَةِ الحامِلِ: تَأكُلُ السَّفَرجَلَ؛ فَإِنَّ الوَلَدَ يَكونُ أطيَبَ ريحا وَ أَصفَى‏ لَوناً.

3.4: The Role of a Mother’s Food on the Newborn

89. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said: “The Prophet of Allah said: “The first thing a parturient should eat is ripe dates, for Allah the Exalted told Mary: “Shake the trunk of the  palm tree, freshly picked dates will drop upon you.”24

Some asked: “O Messenger of Allah! If it is not the season of fresh ripe dates, what must she do?”

He said: “Then seven dates from the dates of Medina; if that is not found, then seven dates from your own cities, for Allah (s.w.t.) says: “By My honour, My glory, My greatness and the highness of My position, if a parturient was to eat ripe dates on the day she delivers her child, boy or girl, will be forbearing.”25

90. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said: “The best of your dates is the Barni.26 Feed it to women while they are in their post-natal period so your children will become wise.”27

91. Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) said: “Feed Barni to your women during their post-natal period and your children will turn out forbearing.”28

دَوْرُ غِذاءِ النُّفَساءِ في المَوْلودِ

89. الإمام عليّ عليه السلام: قالَ رَسولُ اللهِ صلى الله عليه وآله: لِيَكُن أوَّلُ ما تَأكُلُ النُّفَسَاءُ الرُّطَبَ؛ فَإنَّ اللهَ تَعالى‏ قالَ لِمَريَمَ: (وَ هُزِّي إِلَيْكِ بِجِذْعِ النَّخْلَةِ تُساقِطْ عَلَيْكِ رُطَباً جَنِيًّا(

قيلَ: يا رَسولَ اللهِ، فإن لَم يَكُن أوانُ الرُّطَبِ؟

قالَ: سَبعُ تَمراتٍ مِن تَمرِ المَدينَةِ، فإن لَم يَكُن فَسَبعُ تَمراتٍ مِن تَمرِ أمصارِكُم؛ فَإِنَّ اللهَ يَقولُ: و عِزَّتي و جَلالِي و عَظَمَتي وَ ارتِفاعِ مَكاني لا تَأكُلُ نُفَساءُ يَومَ تَلِدُ الرُّطَبَ فَيَكونُ غُلاما إلّا كانَ حَليما، و إن كانت جارِيَةً كانَت حَليمَةً.

90. عنه عليه السلام: خَيرُ تُمورِكُم البَرنيّ، فأطعِموا النّسَاءَ في نِفاسِهِنَّ يَخرُج أولادُكُم حُكَمَاءَ.

91. الإمام الصادق عليه السلام: أطعِمُوا البَرنِيَّ نِساءَكُم في نِفاسِهِنَّ تَحلُمُ أولادُكُم.

1. Qur’an, 17:64.

2. . Makarim al-Akhlaq, vol. 2, p. 354, h. 2660, narrating from ‘Abdullah ibn Mas’ud. Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 77, p. 105, h. 1.

3. . Qur’an, 17:64.

4. . Tafsir al-’Ayyashi, vol. 2, p. 299, h. 102. Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 104, p. 136, h. 5.

5. . Tafsir al-’Ayyashi, vol. 2, p. 300, h. 108. Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 103, p. 294, h. 48.

6. . al-Kafi, vol. 5, p. 124, h. 4, narrating from ‘Ubayd ibn Zurarah.

7. . al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 357, h. 3. al-Mahasin, vol. 2, p. 365, h. 2273.

8. . A dish made from wheat-flour and roasted barley.

9. . Tibb al-A’immah, by Ibn Basaam, p. 88. Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 104, p. 79, h. 4.

10. . Makarim al-Akhlaq, vol. 1, p. 425, h. 1451. Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 104, p. 84, h. 41.

11. . Apparently referring to Imam al-Ridha (a.s.), however the narrator of this tradition is ‘Amr ibn Ibrahim who is a companion of Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.), so it is far from possible that he has narrated this from Imam al-Ridha (a.s.). [This footnote is mentioned in the source of the tradition].

12. . al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 355, h. 17. Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 66, p. 163, h. 46 .

13. . Makarim al-Akhlaq, vol. 1, p. 365, h. 1202. Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 66, p. 141, h. 58.

14. . al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 23, h. 6, narrating from Abu Ziyad from Imam al-Hasan.

15. . al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 23, h. 7. Tahdhib al-Ahkam, vol. 7, p. 440, h. 1758. Both narrating from Muhammad ibn Sinan. Makarim al-Akhlaq, vol. 1, p. 424, h. 1443.

16. . Makarim al-Akhlaq, vol. 1, p. 423, h. 1439. Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 66, p. 444, h. 8. al-Firdaws, vol. 1, p. 101, h. 331, narrating from Ibn ‘Umar.

17. . Tibb al-Nabi, p. 28. Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 62, p. 299.

18. . al-Da’wat, p. 151, h. 405. Makarim al-Akhlaq, vol. 1, p. 372, h. 1230. Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 66, p. 177, h. 37.

19. . Jami’ al-Ahadith, p. 82. Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 66, p. 177, h. 39, narrating from al-Imamah wa al-Tabsirah.

20. . Makarim al-Akhlaq, vol. 1, p. 372, h. 1230. Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 66, p. 176, h. 37.

21. . al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 22, h. 2. al-Mahasin, vol. 2, p. 365, h. 2274. Both narrating from Muhammad ibn Muslim. Makarim al-Akhlaq, vol. 1, p. 373, h. 1241.

22. . al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 363, h. 6. al-Mahasin, vol. 2, p. 313, h. 2047. Makarim al-Akhlaq, vol. 1, p. 385, h. 1295.

23. . al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 22, h. 1. Tahdhib al-Ahkam, vol. 7, p. 439, h. 1755.

24. . Qur’an, 19:25.

25. . al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 22, h. 4. Tahdhib al-Ahkam, vol. 7, p. 440, h. 1757, with ‘wise’ instead of ‘forbearing’. al-Mahasin, vol. 2, p. 346, h. 2194.

26. . A high quality sweet red-yellowish date.

27. . Tahdhib al-Ahkam, vol. 7, p. 440, h. 20. al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 22, h. 3, with ‘virtuous and forbearing’ instead of ‘wise’. Both narrating from Zurarah from Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.).

28. . al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 22, h. 5. al-Mahasin, vol. 2, p. 345, h. 2190. Both narrating from Salih ibn ‘Aqabah. Makarim al-Akhlaq, vol. 1, p. 366, h. 1206, with will become beautiful’ instead of ‘will turn out forbearing’.

Part 5

The Forming of the Life-germ

4.1: The Effects of being Born Pure

92. Ma’ani al-Akhbar, narrating from Husayn ibn Zaid, from Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.), from his fathers (a.s.): “The Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.) said: “Whoever loves us the Ahlul-Bayt must praise Allah Almighty for the foremost of blessings.”

Some asked: “What is the foremost of blessings?”

He answered: “Purity of birth. No one will love us except those who are born pure, and no one hates us other than those who are born impure.”1

93. ‘Ilal al-Shara’i’, narrating from Abu Ayyub al-Ansari who said: “Present the love of ‘Ali to your children, and those who love him are from you, and those who do not love him you must ask its mother where she got him from, for I heard the Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.) say to ‘Ali ibn Abi Talib: “No one loves you except a believer, and no one hates you except a hypocrite, a person of illegitimate birth, or a child conceived during its mother’s menses.”2

94. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said: “Good intention denotes purity of birth.”3

95. Imam al-Baqir (a.s.) said: “The one whose birth is pure will enter Paradise.”4

96. Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) said: “Allah created Paradise clean and pure, so no one will enter it except those who are of pure birth.”5

97. Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) said: “He who has found the harmony of our love in his heart must abundantly pray for his mother for she did not betray his father.”6

آثارُ طيبِ الوِلادَةِ

92. معاني الأخبار عن الحسين بن زيد، عن الإمام الصادق عليه السلام عن آبائه عليهم السلام: قالَ رَسولُ اللهِ صلى الله عليه وآله: مَن أحَبَّنا أَهلَ البَيتِ، فَليَحمَدِ اللهَ تَعالى عَلى‏ أوَّلِ النِّعَمِ. قيلَ: و ما أوَّلُ النِّعَمِ؟

قالَ: طيبُ الوِلادَةِ، و لا يُحِبُّنا إلّا مَن طابَت وِلادَتُهُ، وَ لا يُبغِضُنا إلّا مَن خَبُثَت وِلادَتُهُ.

93. علل الشرائع: أبو أيّوبَ الأنصارِيُ: اعرِضوا حُبَّ عَلِيٍ عَلى‏ أولادِكُم، فَمَن أحَبَّهُ فَهُوَ مِنكُم، وَ مَن لَم يُحِبَّهُ فَاسأَلوا امَّهُ مِن أينَ جَاءَت بِهِ؛ فَإِنّي سَمِعتُ رَسولَ اللهِ صلى الله عليه وآله يَقولُ لِعَلِيّ بنِ أبي طالِبٍ: «لا يُحِبُّكَ إلّا مُؤمِنٌ، ولا يُبْغِضُكَ إلّا مُنافِقٌ أو وَلَدُ زِنيَةٍ، أو حَمَلَتهُ امُّهُ وَ هِيَ طامِثٌ».

94. الإمام عليّ عليه السلام: جَميلُ المَقصَدِ يَدُلُّ عَلى طَهارَةِ المَولِدِ.

95. الإمام الباقر عليه السلام: مَن طَهُرَت وِلادَتُهُ دَخَلَ الجَنَّةَ.

96. الإمام الصادق عليه السلام: إنَّ اللهَ تَعالى‏ خَلَقَ الجَنَّةَ طاهِرَةً مُطَهَّرَةً، فلا يَدخُلُها إلّا مَن طابَت وِلادَتُهُ.

97. عنه عليه السلام: مَن وَجَدَ بَردَ حُبِّنا عَلى قَلبِهِ فَليُكثِرِ الدُّعاءَ لِامِّهِ؛ فَإِنَّها لَم تَخُن

4.2: The Effects of Impure Birth

“… and share with them in wealth and children…”7

98. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “Good morals cannot be separated from any one except a child conceived during menses or a child from adultery.”8

99. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said to ‘Ali (a.s.): “No one will hate you except for three groups of people: the illegitimately born, the hypocrite and he who his mother got pregnant with him while she was in her menses.”9

100. Kanz al-Ummal, narrating from Abu Hurayrah who said: “The Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.) said: “There will come a time for people when devils will be partners in having their children.” Some asked: “Is this possible, O Messenger of Allah?”

He said: “Yes.” They asked: “How can we recognize our children from their children?” He answered: “By having very little modesty and very little mercy.”10

101. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “He who is not embarrassed from what he says or from what is said to him, he is either an illegitimate child, or his mother got pregnant with him while being in her menses.”11

102. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said: “The Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.) said: ‘Allah has prohibited the entering of Paradise for he who is abusive, has little modesty, and does not fear of what he says and what is said about him. If you were to investigate him, you would not find him other than being born from an illegitimate relationship or the partner of Satan.”

He was asked: “O Messenger of Allah! Is there a partner of Satan among people?”

The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “Have you not read Allah’s saying: “…and share with them in wealth and children…?”12

103. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said: “He who is vile is a sign of his birth being malevolent.”13

104. Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) said: “No one will hate us except for whose birth is impure, or their mother became pregnant during her menses.”14

آثارُ خُبْثِ الوِلادَةِ

(وَ شارِكْهُمْ فِي الْأَمْوالِ وَ الْأَوْلادِ).

98. رسول الله صلى الله عليه وآله: الخُلُقُ الحَسَنُ لا يُنزَعُ إلّا مِن وَلَدِ حَيضَةٍ، أو وَلَدِ زِنيَةٍ.

99. عنه صلى الله عليه وآله لِعَليّ عليه السلام‏ لا يُبغِضُكُم إلّا ثَلاثَةٌ: وَلَدُ زِنا، وَ مُنافِقٌ، وَ مَن حَمَلَت بِهِ امُّهُ و هِيَ حائِضٌ.

100. كنز العمّال عن أبي هريرة عن رسول الله صلى الله عليه وآله: يَأتي عَلَى النّاسِ زَمانٌ يُشارِكُهُمُ الشَّياطِينُ في أولادِهِم. قيلَ: و كائِنٌ ذلِكَ يا رَسولَ اللهِ؟ قالَ: نَعَم. قالوا: و كَيفَ نَعرِفُ أولادَنا مِن أولادِهِم؟ قالَ: بِقِلَّةِ الحَياءِ، و قِلَّةِ الرَّحمَةِ.

101. رسول الله صلى الله عليه وآله: مَن لَم يَستَحِ فيما قالَ، أو قيلَ لَهُ فَهُوَ لِغَيرِ رِشَدَةٍ، أو حَمَلَت بِهِ امُّهُ عَلى غَيرِ طُهرٍ.

102. الإمام عليّ عليه السلام: قالَ رَسولُ اللهِ صلى الله عليه وآله: إنَّ اللهَ حَرَّمَ الجَنَّةَ عَلى كُلِّ فَحّاشٍ بَذي‏ءٍ قَليلِ الحَياءِ، لا يُبالي ما قالَ، و لا ما قيلَ لَهُ؛ فَإِنَّكَ إن فَتَّشتَهُ لَم تَجِدهُ إلّا لِغَيَّةٍ أو شِركَ شَيطانٍ. فَقيلَ: يا رَسولَ اللهِ، و في النّاسِ شِركُ شَيطانٍ؟!

فَقالَ رَسولُ اللهِ صلى الله عليه وآله: أما تَقرَأُ قَولَ اللهِ: (وَ شارِكْهُمْ فِي الْأَمْوالِ وَ الْأَوْلادِ).

103. عنه عليه السلام: مَن لَؤُمَ ساءَ ميلادُهُ.

104. الإمام الصادق عليه السلام: لا يُبغِضُنا إلّا مَن خَبُثَت وِلادَتُهُ، أو حَمَلَت بِهِ امُّهُ في حَيضِها.

4.3: The Harm of Copulating with a Woman during her Menses

“They ask you concerning [intercourse during] menses. Say: ‘It is hurtful.’ So keep away from [intercourse with] wives during the menses, and do not approach them till they are clean. And when they become clean, go into them as Allah has commanded you. Indeed Allah loves the penitent and He loves those who keep clean.”15

105. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “He who has intercourse with his wife while she is in her menses and his child is born with leprosy or alphosis, he should not blame anyone other than himself.”16

106. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “My Nation! Indeed Allah the Blessed and Supreme dislikes you to have any of twenty four characteristics and He has reproached you about them: …He dislikes a man to copulate with his wife while she is in her menses, and if he was to copulate her and the child is born with leprosy or alphosis, he should not blame anyone other than himself.”17

107. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “If someone was to have intercourse with his wife while she is in her menses and then a child is born to them who is afflicted with leprosy, he should not blame anyone other than himself.”18

108. al-Kafi, narrating from ‘Adhafir al-Sayrafi who said: “Abu ‘Abdullah [al-Sadiq] (a.s.) said: “Do you see these repulsive looking people?”

I said: “Yes.”

He said: “It is because their fathers had intercourse with their mothers while they were in their menses.”19 20

مَضَارٌّ وَطءِ الحائِضِ

(وَ يَسْئَلُونَكَ عَنِ الْمَحِيضِ قُلْ هُوَ أَذىً فَاعْتَزِلُوا النِّساءَ فِي

الْمَحِيضِ وَ لا تَقْرَبُوهُنَّ حَتَّى يَطْهُرْنَ فَإِذا تَطَهَّرْنَ فَأْتُوهُنَّ

مِنْ حَيْثُ أَمَرَكُمُ اللَّهُ إِنَّ اللَّهَ يُحِبُّ التَّوَّابِينَ وَ يُحِبُّ الْمُتَطَهِّرِينَ).

105. رسول الله صلى الله عليه وآله‏ مَن جامَعَ امرَأَتَهُ وهِيَ حائِضٌ فَخَرَجَ الوَلَدُ مَجذوماً أو أبرَصَ فَلا يَلومَنَّ إلّا نَفسَهُ.

106. عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: إنَّ اللهَ تَبارَكَ و تَعالى كَرِه لَكُم أيَّتُها الامَّةُ أربَعاً وعِشرينَ خَصلَةً، ونَهاكُم عَنها: … كَرِهَ لِلرَّجُلِ أن يَغشَى امرَأَتَهُ و هِيَ حائِضٌ، فَإِن غَشِيَها فَخَرَجَ

الوَلَدُ مَجذوما أو أبرَصَ فَلا يَلومَنَّ إلّا نَفسَهُ.

107. عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: مَن وَطِئَ امرَأَتَهُ و هِيَ حائِضٌ فَقُضِيَ بَينَهُما وَلَدٌ فأصابَهُ جُذامٌ فَلا يَلومَنَّ إلّا نَفسَهُ.

108. الكافي عن عذافر الصيرفي: قالَ أبو عَبدِ اللهِ عليه السلام: تَرى‏ هؤُلاءِ المُشَوَّهينَ خَلقُهُم؟ قالَ: قُلتُ: نَعَم.

قالَ: هؤُلاءِ الَّذينَ آباؤهُم يَأتونَ نِساءَهُم فِي الطَّمَثِ.

4.4: The Blessings of Supplicating During Intercourse

109. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “Be alert! If a person, at the time of approaching his wife says: ‘In the name of Allah, O Allah! Keep Satan away from us, and keep Satan away from what You have blessed us with’, and then a child is determined for them in this intercourse, Satan can never harm him.”21

110. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “O ‘Ali! If you were to have intercourse, say: ‘In the name of Allah. O Allah! Keep Satan away from us and keep him away from what you have blessed me with’, and if it is destined that a child is conceived from you two, Satan will never harm him.”22

111. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said: “If a man intends to have intercourse with his wife, he should say: ‘O’ Allah! I made her private part lawful [for myself] by Your command and I accepted her as a trust from you. So, if You have destined a child from her for me, make him a healthy son; and do not allow Satan to have a share in him nor any partnership.”23

112. Imam al-Baqir (a.s.) said: “If you intend to have a child, then say at the time of copulation: “O Allah! Bless me with a child and make him pious, with no additional or missing organs [physically healthy] and make his ending a good one.”24

113. Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) said: “He who desires his wife to become pregnant, he should perform a two- unit prayer with long bowing and prostration after his Friday prayers, and then say: “O Allah! I beseech You the same thing that Zachariah asked You. O Lord! Do not leave me alone, for You are the best of inheritors! O’ Allah! Bestow upon me from You a pure offspring, indeed You are the hearer of prayers. O’ Allah! By Your name I made her lawful for me and I took her as a trust from You. So, if You have decreed a child in her womb, make him a blessed pure son and do not allow Satan to be a share or partner in him.”25

114. Tafsir al-’Ayyashi, narrating from Sulayman ibn Khalid who said: “I asked Abu ‘Abdullah [al-Sadiq] (a.s.) what the meaning was of Allah’s saying: ‘…and share with them in wealth and children…?’ He (a.s.) answered: “In this regard, you must say: “I seek refuge in Allah the All-hearing, the All-knowing from the accursed Satan.”26

بَرَكاتُ الدُّعاءِ عِنْدَ الجِماعِ‏

109. رسول الله صلى الله عليه وآله: أما لَو أنَّ أحَدَهُم يَقولُ حِينَ يَأتي أهلَهُ: «بِسمِ اللهِ، اللّهُمَّ جَنِّبني الشَّيطانَ، و جَنِّبِ الشَّيطانَ ما رَزَقتَنا» ثُمَّ قُدِّرَ بَينَهما فِي ذلِكَ أو قُضِيَ وَلَدٌ .

110. عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: يا عَلِيُ، إذا جامَعتَ فَقُل: «بِسمِ اللهِ، اللّهُمَّ جَنِّبنَا الشَّيطانَ و جَنِّبِ الشَّيطانَ ما رَزَقتَني»، فَإِن قُضِيَ أن يَكونَ بَينَكُما وَلَدٌ لَم يَضُرَّهُ الشَّيطانُ أبَداً.

111. الإمام عليّ عليه السلام: إذا أرادَ أحَدُكُم مُجامَعَةَ زَوجَتِهِ فَليَقُل: اللّهُمَّ إنّي استَحلَلتُ فَرجَها بِأَمرِكَ، و قَبِلتُها بِأَمانَتِكَ، فَإِن قَضَيتَ لي مِنها وَلَداً فَاجعَلهُ ذَكَراً سَوِيّاً، و لا تَجعَل‏ لِلشَّيطانِ فيهِ نَصيبا و لا شَريكاً.

112. الإمام الباقر عليه السلام: إذا أرَدتَ الوَلَدَ فَقُل عِندَ الجِماعِ: اللّهُمَّ ارزُقني وَلَداً، وَ اجَعَلهُ تَقِيّاً لَيسَ في خَلقِهِ زِيادَةٌ و لا نُقصانٌ، وَ اجعَل عاقِبَتَهُ إلى خَيرٍ.

113. الإمام الصادق عليه السلام: مَن أرادَ أن يُحبَلَ لَهُ فَليُصَلِّ رَكعَتَينِ بَعدَ الجُمعَةِ، يُطيلُ فيهِمَا الرُّكوعَ وَ السُّجودَ، ثُمَّ يَقولُ: اللّهُمَّ إنّي أَسأَلُكَ بِما سَأَلَكَ بِهِ زَكرِيّا، يا رَبِّ لا تَذَرنِي فَردا و أنتَ خَيرُ الوارِثينَ، اللّهُمَّ هَب لي مِن لَدُنكَ ذُرِّيَّةً طَيِّبَةً، إنَّكَ سَمِيعُ الدُّعاءِ، اللّهُمَّ بِاسمِكَ استَحلَلتُها، و في أمانَتِكَ أخَذتُها، فَإِن قَضَيتَ في رَحِمِها وَلَدا فَاجعَلهُ غُلاما مُبارَكا زَكِيّا، و لا تَجعَل لِلشَّيطانِ فيهِ شِركا و لا نَصيبا.

114. تفسير العيّاشي عن سليمان بن خالد: قُلتُ لِأبي عَبدِ اللهِ عليه السلام: ما قَولُ اللهِ: «شَارِكْهُمْ فِى الْاءَمْوَ لِ وَ الْاءَوْلَدِ»؟ قالَ: فَقالَ: قُل في ذلِكَ قَولًا: أَعوذُ بِاللهِ السَّميعِ العَليمِ مِنَ الشَّيطانِ الرَّجيمِ.

4.5: The Role of the Conditions on the Formation of the Life-Germ

115. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “It is not good for a man to associate with his wife after he has had a wet dream until he performs his ritual bath from the wet dream he saw, but if he was to do so [copulate before having bath] and the child was born insane, he should not blame anyone other than himself.”27

116. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “If any of you was to copulate with his wife, he must cover himself, for if he does not cover himself, the angels will become shy and leave, and Satan will be present, and so if a child is conceived from them, Satan has a share in him.”28

117. Imam al-Ridha (a.s.) said: “Having intercourse after intercourse without a ritual bath in between will cause insanity in the child [conceived from it].”29

118. Imam al-Ridha (a.s.) said: “Do not have intercourse with women at the beginning of the night, in neither winter or summer, as the stomach and veins are full and it is not an appropriate act. There is also the fear of colic, chin-trembling gout, renal calculus, urine distillation, hernia, poor eyesight and weak memory. So, if you intend to have intercourse, it must be at the end of the night, for it is healthier for the body and more hopeful for the child [being conceived], and it is better for the increase of intelligence of the child that is conceived between them.”30 31

دَوْرُ الأَحْوالِ فِي انْعِقادِ النُّطفَةِ

115. رسول الله صلى الله عليه وآله: يُكرَهُ أن يَغشَى الرَّجُلُ المَرأَةَ و قَدِ احتَلَمَ حَتّى يَغتَسِلَ مِنِ احتِلامِهِ الَّذي رَأى، فَإن فَعَلَ و خَرَجَ الوَلَدُ مَجنوناً فَلا يَلومَنَّ إلّا نَفسَهُ.

116. عنه صلى الله عليه وآله‏ إذا أتى‏ أحَدُكُم أهلَهُ فَليَستَتِر؛ فَإِنَّهُ إذا لَم يَستَتِر استَحيَتِ المَلائِكَةُ و خَرَجَت، و حَضَرَهُ الشَّيطانُ، فَإذا كانَ بَينَهُما وَلَدٌ كانَ الشَّيطانُ فيهِ شَريكٌ‏ .

117. الإمام الرضا عليه السلام‏ الجِماعُ بَعدَ الجِماعِ مِن غَيرِ أن يَكونَ بَينَهُما غُسلٌ يُورِثُ لِلوَلَدِ الجُنونَ.

118. عنه عليه السلام: لا تَقرَبِ النِّساءَ في أوَّلِ اللَّيلِ لا شِتاءً و لا صَيفاً، و ذلِكَ أنَّ المَعِدَةَ وَ العُروقَ تَكونُ مُمتَلِئَةً و هُوَ غَيرُ مَحمودٍ، يُتَخَوَّفُ مِنهُ القولَنجُ‏ وَ الفالِجُ، و اللَّقوَةُ، و النِّقرِسُ، و الحَصاةُ، و التَّقطِيرُ، وَ الفَتقُ وَ ضَعفُ البَصَرِ و الدِّماغِ.

فَإِذا أُريدَ ذلِكَ فَليَكُن في آخِرِ اللَّيلِ؛ فَإِنَّهُ أصَحُّ لِلبَدَنِ، و أرجى‏ لِلوَلَدِ، وَ أذكى‏ لِلعَقلِ فِي الوَلَدِ الَّذي يُقضى‏ بَينهُما.

1. Ma’ani al-Akhbar, p. 161, h. 1. ‘Ilal al-Shara’i’, p. 141, h. 1. al-Mahasin, vol. 1, p. 232, h. 419.

2. . ‘Ilal al-Shara’i’, p. 145, h. 12. Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 39, p. 301, h. 110.

3. . Ghurar al-Hikam, h. 4758.

4. . al-Mahasin, vol. 1, p. 233, h. 423, narrating from Sadit al-Sayrafi. Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 4, p. 287, h. 10.

5. . ‘Ilal al-Shara’i’, p. 564, h. 1, narrating from Sa’d ibn ‘Umar al-Jallab. al-Mahasin, vol. 1, p. 233, h. 424, narrating from ‘Abdullah ibn Sinan.

6. . Kitab Man la Yahdarhu al-Faqih, vol. 3, p. 493, h. 4745. ‘Ilal al-Shara’i’, p. 142, h. 5, narrating from al-Mufaddal ibn ‘Umar.

7. . Qur’an, 17:64.

8. . al-Firdaws, vol. 2, p. 200, h, narrating from Abu Hurayrah. 2992. Kanz al-Ummal, vol. 3, p. 3, h. 5136.

9. . ‘Ilal al-Shara’i’, p. 142, h. 6, narrating from Um Salamah. Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 27, p. 151, h. 19.

10. . Kanz al-Ummal, vol. 3, p. 126, h. 5795, narrating from Abu al-Shaikh from Abu Hurayrah.

11. . Usd al-Ghabah, vol. 2, p. 643, h. 2461. al-Firdaws, vol. 3, p. 623, h. 5947. Both narraiting fron Showayfa’. Kanz al-Ummal, vol. 3, p. 125, h. 5794, narrating from al-Tabarani.

12. . al-Kafi, vol. 2, p. 323, h. 3, narrating from Sulaym ibn Qays from Imam ‘Ali (a.s.). al-Zuhd, p. 7, h. 12, narrating from sulaym ibn Qays from Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) from the Prophet (s.a.w.).

13. . Ghurar al-Hikam, h. 7817.

14. . Kitab Man la Yahdarhu al-Faqih, vol. 1, p. 96, h. 203.

15. . Qur’an, 2:222.

16. . Kitab Man la Yahdarhu al-Faqih, vol. 1, p. 96, h. 201. Makarim al-Akhlaq, vol. 1, p. 459, h. 1557.

17. . Kitab Man la Yahdarhu al-Faqih, vol. 3, p. 556, h. 4914. al-Khisal, p. 520, h. 9. al-Amali, by al-Saduq, p. 378, h. 478. All narrating from al-Husayn ibn Zaid from Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.).

18. . al-Mu’jam al-Awsat, vol. 3, p. 326, h. 3300, narrating from Abu Hurayrah. Kanz al-‘Ummal, vol. 16, p. 352, h. 44885.

19. . al-Kafi, vol. 5, p. 539, h. 5. ‘Ilal al-Shara’i’, p. 82, h. 1, narrating from Ibn Abu ‘Adhafir al-Sayrafi.

20. . What we can conclude from this set of traditions is that sexual intercourse and becoming pregnant during the period of menstruation can be one reason for having repulsive features or being afflicted with leprosy or alphosis, but it’s not the only factor. Therefore, we cannot say that any child afflicted with any of the above diseases is the result of having unlawful intercourse. There is no clear mentioning in the traditions that could answer as to whether intercourse during the state of menstruation leads to these consequences or not, but rather the negation of these things can be concluded, and scientific research can be helpful in this regard.

21. . Sahih al-Bukhari, vol. 5, p. 1982 h. 4870. Sunan Ibn Majah, vol. 1, p. 618, h. 1919. Musnad Ibn Hanbal, vol. 1, p. 465, h. 1867. All narrating from Ibn ‘Abbas.

22. . Tuhaf al-’Uqul, p. 12. al-Ikhtisas, p. 134 h. 115, narrating from al-Khudri.

23. . al-Khisal, p. 637, h. 10, narrating from Abu Basir and Muhammad ibn Muslim from Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) from his forefathers (a.s.). Tuhaf al-’Uqul, p. 125. Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 10, p. 115, h. 1.

24. . al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 10, h. 12. Tahdhib al-Ahkam, vol. 7, p. 411, h. 1641. Both narrating from Muhammad ibn Muslim.

25. . al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 8, h. 3. Tahdhib al-Ahkam, vol. 3, p. 315, h. 974. narrating from Muhammad ibn Muslim.

26. . Tafsir al-’Ayyashi, vol. 2, p. 300, h. 107. Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 103, p. 294 h. 47.

27. . Tahdhib al-Ahkam, vol. 7, p. 412, h. 1646, narrating from Muhammad ibn al-’Is from Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) . Kitab Man la Yahdarhu al-Faqih, vol. 3, p. 557, h. 4914, narrating from al-Husayn ibn Zaid ibn ‘Ali ibn al-Husayn (a.s.) from Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) from his forefathers (a.s.) from the Prophet (s.a.w.).

28. . al-Mu’jam al-Awsat, vol. 1, p. 63, h. 176, narrating from Abu Hurayrah. Kanz al-Ummal, vol. 16, p. 343, h. 44835.

29. . Tibb al-Imam al-Ridha (a.s.), p. 28. Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 62, p. 321.

30. . Tibb al-Imam al-Ridha (a.s.), p. 64. Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 62, p. 327.

31. . It must be said that the role of the different states and times of sexual intercourse in the destiny of the child mentioned in these traditions apparently means that they have a partial effect, and it is not the complete cause. And Allah knows best.

Part 6

The Rights of Children

Chapter 3

Introduction

Through studying the teachings of the holy infallibles (a.s.) regarding the rights of a newborn, one can conclude that a child in this stage has eight rights upon his family. These rights are as follows:

1- Honouring the Birth

The day that Allah Almighty bestows a blessing upon a person is a day of festivity,1 being auspicious and blessed. A newborn is a great bounty for a family, and in reality a birthday party is a form of expressing gratitude for this great divine blessing. To congratulate and giving a banquet in honour of the newborn is also something highly recommended to do.

Remembering birthdays is to honour the divine blessing of the human being coming into existence. The newborn is brought into this world by Allah as a glorious blessing upon its family.

The Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.) once asked Imam ‘Ali (a.s.): “What is the first blessing that Allah gave you?”

Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) answered: “That He, may His tribute be glorified, created me and I was absolutely nothing.”

Therefore, occasions such as birthdays or celebrating reaching the age of maturity (taklif) with the purpose of giving thanks for Allah’s blessings are good and commendable customs to observe, even though there is no particular evidence to indicate it is religiously recommended (mustahab).

2- Bathing the Newborn

2- Bathing the Newborn^2

There are a few notable points in regards to washing a newborn child:

A) What is meant here in bathing is not simply washing, but a ritual religious bathing. Accordingly, the person who bathes the baby must observe the rulings of ritual bathing, as in the intention and the order of washing the parts.

B) This bathing is recommended, provided it does not harm the newborn in any way.3

C) The act of bathing the newborn is recommended to be done at the time of birth, and it is permissible to delay it for up to three days.4

D) Some of the early jurists viewed that the ritual bathing of a newborn is obligatory.5

3- Reciting Adhan and Iqamah in the Newborn’s Ears

Here are some following points important in this regard:

A) The Adhan must be recited in the right ear of the newborn, and the Iqamah in the left ear.

B) It is stated in some narrations that the time of reciting the Adhan and Iqamah in the ears of the newborn is after hearing it cry, and, in some other narrations it says that it is recommended to be done before the umbilical cord is cut.

C) This Islamic tradition indicates that the first sounds a baby hears play an important role in the nature of the child, and which also has many effects on his upbringing and future.

4- Feeding the Newborn for the First Time

This means that it is recommended to mix a very small amount of the soil of Karbala with some water from the Euphrates^6 and put in the newborn’s mouth.

The reason for doing so is that performing such an act will influence the child’s aspiration to seek truth, justice and love for Ahlul Bayt (a.s.), penetrating in newborn’s soul from the very beginning of his life, as has been mentioned in some traditions.7

The recommendation of other things like feeding the baby with rain water, warm water, dates and honey before anything else have also been mentioned in some traditions. Therefore, if possible, it is better to combine and mix honey, dates and some rain water or water from the Euphrates and then given to the baby.8

This also indicates that the first food given to the newborn, like the first voices the newborn hears, play an effective role in the fate of the child.

5- Choosing a Good Name

According to the traditions in Islam, choosing a good name for the newborn is considered as the first benevolent act the family performs for the child. It is imperative that through the guidelines set out by the Leaders of Islam, Muslim families must choose the best names for their children. These statements of guidance are:

A) Families can choose any good name for their child.

B) The best names are those which indicate the servitude and relation of a person to his Creator.

C) The best names are the names of the holy prophets, the infallibles and religious figures in Islam, and the best of all is the name Muhammad.

D) For those who Allah Almighty has granted four sons, it is blameworthy if they do not name one of them Muhammad.

E) Choosing a name for a child should be done before its birth, and if it is not known what the sex of the newborn is, they may choose a name which is appropriate to both.9 Of course, there is no problem in changing the name after the delivery.

F) It is recommended that after a boy is born to name him Muhammad for the first seven days, and then the parents may choose any other name they wish.

G) Certain names like Muhammad and Fatimah have special rights and respect that must be observed because of their connection with great Islamic characters.

H) There are some names that are reprehensible (makruh) because they symbolised the wrong and injustice, like: Shahab, Hariq, Hubab, Kalb, Firar, Harb, and Zalim.

I) It is reprehensible to put names that indicate pride, or something that’s negation in a conversation is considered as a bad omen, such as: Mubarak – the blessed, in which its negation is ‘the unblessed’.

J) The names that are befitting only to Allah, the Exalted, (like Quddus, Hakam, and Khaliq) should not be used as the name of someone, to which some jurists have considered this as prohibited.

6- Shaving the Newborn’s Head

It is a recommended act to shave the hair on the head of a newborn on the seventh day after the birth and donate its equal weight in gold or silver for charity, and there is no difference as to whether the newborn is a girl or a boy.

7- To Offer a Sacrifice for the Newborn

Performing a ‘Aqiqah is the sacrificing of a sheep^10 to feed people upon the birth of a child.11

The things that must be observed in this regard are:

A) To offer a sacrifice for a child is a highly recommended act, and some jurists^12 have even considered it obligatory.

B) It is recommended that the offering for a boy should be a male sheep and for a girl a female sheep.

C) The time of sacrifice is to be done on the seventh day after the birth, and if it is delayed any time after that it will still remain as a recommended practice. If the parents did not perform the ‘Aqiqah for the child, it is recommended that the child himself does so when he becomes mature.

D) It is recommended that the meat of the sacrifice be divided among the believers and to pray for the baby, but it is better to cook the meat and invite at least ten persons to eat and pray for the newborn.

E) It is recommended when cutting up the ‘Aqiqah not to break the bones. Another recommendation is that one leg and thigh, or rather one fourth of the sacrifice should be given to the midwife.

F) It is reprehensible for the parents and those supported by the father, not to eat from the offering, in particular the mother.13

G) It is recommended to recite the special supplication for the ‘Aqiqah while it is being slaughtered. The supplications narrated from Ahlul Bayt (a.s.) in this regard are abundant.14

8- Circumcision of the Baby

It is a recommended act to circumcise the newborn boy on the seventh day after his birth, and it is permissible to delay it until up to the age of puberty. It is of precaution that the child’s parents would get him circumcised before puberty, but after puberty it is an urgent obligation and delaying it is not permissible.

It is also recommended that at the time of the act of circumcising the child, the related supplication should be recited.15

1. The Arabic word ‘Id is derived from the root ‘awada which means ‘to return’, so the day on which missed out blessings are return to a person or to the society is called a festive day. However, this word gradually became used used for any auspicious or blessed day. The greater the blessing of Allah is, the festive is more magnificent and glorious with greater joy and happiness. Based on this definition, each day that a man does not commit a sin is counted a day of festivity for him. In this regard Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) has said: “Every day in which Allah is not disobeyed in is a festive ‘Id day.”

2. . Some jurists have presumed that what is meant is the general washing and cleaning of the newborn. Refer to: Jawahir al-Kalam, vol. 5, p. 71.

3. . Tahrir al-Wasilah, vol. 2, p. 31.

4. . al-’Urwah al-Wuthqa, vol. 2, p. 157.

5. . Jawahir al-Kalam, vol. 5, p. 71.

6. . Refer to h. 143-145.

7. . Refer to h. 142.

8. . Jawahir al-Kalam, vol. 31, p. 253.

9. . Refer to h. 148.

10. . A goat, cow, or a camel can also be sacrificed, and it is recommended to observe all rulings of slaughtering in them.

11. . Tahrir al-Wasilah, vol. 2, p. 316.

12. . Like Askafi, Sayyid Murtada and Fayz Kashani. Ahkam al-Atfal, p. 196.

13. . Wasa’il al-Shi’ah, vol. 21, p. 428.

14. . Wasa’il al-Shi’ah, vol. 15, p. 426-428.

15. . Refer to page 115, h. 193.

Part 7

The Rights of a Newborn

The Rights of a Newborn

“And peace be on him the day he was born, and the day he dies, and the day he shall be raised alive!”1

“And peace be on me the day I was born, and the day I die, and the day I shall be raised alive.”2

119. Imam al-Baqir (a.s.) said: “O child of three [great] days: The day which you were born, the day which you will enter your grave and the day on which you will come out towards your Lord. What great days they will be.”3

120. Imam al-Baqir (a.s.) said, while congratulating a man for his newborn child: “I ask Allah to make him a [worthy] successor in your life and a successor after you, for indeed a man succeeds his father in his life and after his death.”4

121. Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) said: “The greatest day of a person is the day he is born, and his smallest day is the day he dies.”5

122. Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) said: “A man said when congratulating someone who was blessed with a son: “Congratulations for your newborn horseman.”

Imam Hasan (a.s.) said to him: “How do you know he will be a rider or a walker?”

The man said: “May I be sacrificed for you! Then what should I say?”

He (a.s.) said: “Say: you have thanked the Giver [of this bounty], and may the given be a blessing for you. May he reach his perfection and may He sustain you with His kindness.”6

123. al-Kafi, narrating from ‘Ali ibn al-Hakam, from one of the Shi’ah who said: “For the birth of one of his children, Abu al-Hasan Musa [al-Kazim] (a.s.) had a feast, and he fed fulazaj^7 in large bowls to the people of Medina in mosques and lanes for three days.”8

تَعْظِيمُ الميلادِ

(وَ سَلامٌ عَلَيْهِ يَوْمَ وُلِدَ وَ يَوْمَ يَمُوتُ وَ يَوْمَ يُبْعَثُ حَيًّا)

(وَ السَّلامُ عَلَيَّ يَوْمَ وُلِدْتُ وَ يَوْمَ أَمُوتُ وَ يَوْمَ أُبْعَثُ حَيًّا)

119. الإمام الباقر عليه السلام: يَا ابنَ الأيّامِ الثَّلاثِ، يَومُكَ الَّذي وُلِدتَ فيهِ، و يَومُكَ الَّذي تَنزِلُ فيهِ قَبرَكَ، ويَومُكَ الَّذي تَخرُجُ فيهِ إِلى رَبِّكَ، فَيَا لَهُ مِن يَومٍ عَظيمٍ.

120. عنه عليه السلام- في تَهنِئَتِهِ لِرَجُلٍ بِمَولودٍ أَسأَلُ اللهَ أن يَجعَلَهُ خَلَفاً مَعَكَ، وَ خَلَفاً بَعدَكَ، فَإِنَّ الرَّجُلَ يُخلِفُ أَباهُ فِي حَياتِهِ و مَوتِهِ.

121. الإمام الصادق عليه السلام: أكبَرُ ما يَكونُ الإِنسانُ يَومَ يولَدُ، و أصغَرُ ما يَكونُ يَومَ يَموتُ.

122. عنه عليه السلام: هَنَّأَ رَجُلٌ رَجُلًا أصابَ ابناً فَقالَ: يُهنِئُكَ الفارِسُ. فَقالَ لَهُ الحَسَنُ عليه السلام: ما عِلمُكَ يَكونُ فارِساً أو راجِلًا؟

قَالَ: جُعِلتُ فِداكَ فَما أَقولُ؟

قال: تَقولُ: شَكَرتَ الواهِبَ، و بورِكَ لَكَ فِي المَوهوبِ، و بَلَغَ أَشُدَّهُ، و رَزَقَكَ بِرَّهُ.

123. الكافي عن عليّ بن الحكم عن بعض أصحابنا: أولَمَ أبُو الحَسَنِ مُوسى عليه السلام وَليمَةً عَلى بَعضِ وُلدِهِ، فَأَطعَمَ أهلَ المَدينَةِ ثَلاثَةَ أيّامٍ الفالوذَجاتِ‏ في الجِفانِ فِي المَساجِدِ وَ الأزِقَّةِ.

1.2: Washing the Newborn

124. Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) said: “Washing the newborn baby is obligatory.”9

غَسْلُ المَوْلودِ

124. الإمام الصادق عليه السلام: غَسلُ المَولودِ واجِبٌ.

1.3: Reciting Adhan and Iqamah in the Newborn’s ears

125. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “Whoever is granted a newborn and recites the Adhan in his right ear and theIqamah in his left ear, Um al-Sibyan^10 will not harm it.”11

126. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “If someone has a newborn child, he must recite the Adhan in his right ear and the Iqamah in his left ear, for this will bring security from the cursed Satan.”12

127. Sunan Abi Dawud, narrating from Abu Rafay’ who said: “When Fatimah (a.s.) gave birth to Hasan ibn ‘Ali (a.s.), I saw the Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.) reciting the Adhan in his ear.”13

128. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said: “When the time came for Fatimah to give birth to her child, the Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.) said to Asma’ bint ‘Umays and Um Salamah: “Stay with her so that when her baby is delivered and starts to cry, recite the Adhan in its right ear and the IqÁmah in its left ear, for whoever this is done to will be safeguarded from Satan, and then do not do anything until I come.”

When Fatimah delivered the baby, they did what he (s.a.w.) told them, then the Prophet (s.a.w.) came and cut his umbilical cord and put a little bit of his saliva in the newborn’s mouth and said: “O Allah! I seek refuge to You for him and his offspring from the vice of the cursed Satan.”14

129. Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) said, regarding some of what is done to an infant at the time of his birth: “Tell the midwife or anyone who is with her to recite the Adhan in his right ear so that the child would never become insane or followed by a jinn.”15

130. Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) said, mentioning some of the things to be done to an infant at the time of his birth: “Recite the Adhan in his right ear and the Iqamah in his left ear. Do this before cutting the umbilical cord, for the child will never be a coward and will not be afflicted by [the sickness of] Um al-Sibyan.”16

الأذانُ وَ الإِقامَةُ في أُذُنِ الوَليدِ

125. رسول الله صلى الله عليه وآله: مَن وُلِدَ لَهُ فَأَذَّنَ في أُذُنِهِ اليُمنى و أَقامَ في أُذُنِهِ اليُسرى، لَم يَضُرَّهُ أُمُّ الصِّبيانِ‏ .

126. عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: مَن وُلِدَ لَهُ مَولودٌ فَليُؤَذِّن في اذُنِهِ اليُمنى بِأَذانِ الصَّلاةِ، وَليُقِم فِي اليُسرى؛

فَإِنَّها عِصمَةٌ مِنَ الشَّيطانِ الرَّجيمِ.

127. سنن أبي داود عن أبي رافع: رَأَيتُ رَسولَ اللهِ صلى الله عليه وآله أذَّنَ في اذُنِ الحَسَنِ بنِ عَلِيّ حِينَ وَلَدَتهُ فاطِمَةُ بِالصَّلاةِ.

128. الإمام عليّ عليه السلام: لَمّا حَضَرَت وِلادَةُ فاطِمَةَ عليها السلام، قال رَسولُ اللهِ صلى الله عليه وآله لِأسماءَ بِنتِ عُمَيسٍ و امِّ سَلَمَةَ: احضَراها، فإِذا وَقَعَ وَلَدُها واستَهَلَّ فَأَذِّنا في اذُنِهِ اليُمنى وأَقِيما في اذُنِهِ اليُسرى؛ فَإِنَّهُ لا يُفعَلُ ذلِكَ بِمِثلِهِ إلّا عُصِمَ مِنَ الشَّيطانِ، و لا تُحدِثا شَيئا حَتّى آتِيَكُما.

فَلَمَّا وَلَدَت فَعَلَتا ذلِكَ، فَأتاهُ النَّبِيّ صلى الله عليه وآله فَسَرَّهُ وَ لَبَّأهُ‏ بِريقِهِ، و قالَ: اللّهُمَّ إنِّي اعيذُهُ بِكَ و وُلدَهُ مِنَ الشَّيطانِ الرَّجيمِ.

129. الإمام الصادق عليه السلام- فيما يُفعَلُ بِالمَولودِ إذا وُلِدَ-: مُرُوا القابِلَةَ أو بَعضَ مَن يَليهِ أن تُقيمَ الصَّلاةَ في اذُنِهِ اليُمنى؛ فَلا يُصيبُهُ لَمَمٌ‏ و لا تابِعَةٌ أبَداً.

130. عنه عليه السلام- أيضا-: و أذِّن في اذُنِهِ اليُمنى و أقِم فِي اليُسرى، تَفعَلُ بِهِ ذلِكَ قَبلَ أن تَقطَعَ سُرَّتَهُ؛ فَإِنَّهُ لا يَفزَعُ أبَداً، و لا تُصيبُهُ امُّ الصِّبيانِ.

1.4: The First Feeding

131. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “The first thing a newborn should be fed is warm water.”17

132. Musnad Abu Ya’la, narrating from Abu Musa who said: “A son was born to me. I took him to the Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.) and he named him Ibrahim. He then fed him a date [as the first piece of food he ate], prayed that he be blessed, and he then returned him to me.”18

133. Sahih Muslim, narrating from ‘Aishah who said: “Newborns were brought to the Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.) and he blessed and was the first to feed them.”19

134. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said: “Feed your newborns firstly with dates, as the Prophet (s.a.w.) did so with Hasan and Husayn (a.s.).”20

135. al-Kafi, narrating from Yunus, from one of the companions that Abu Ja’far [al-Baqir] (a.s.) said: “The first food of a newborn should be the water of the Euphrates, and the Iqamah is to be recited in his ear.”

In another narration he (a.s.) said: “The first food that should be given to your children is water from the Euphrates and soil from the grave of Husayn (a.s.), and if that is not possible, then with rain water.”21

136. Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) said: “Let the first thing your children eat be the soil from the grave of Husayn (a.s.), for it is a safeguard.”22

137. Imam al-Ridha said, in al-Fiqh –a book attributed to him: “When a child is born, feed him first with water from the Euphrates if you are able to, otherwise with honey.”23

التَّحْنيكُ‏

131. رسول الله صلى الله عليه وآله: يُحَنَّكُ‏ المَولودُ بِالماءِ السُّخنِ.

132. مسند أبي يعلى عن أبي موسى: وُلِدَ لي غُلامٌ فَأتَيتُ بِهِ رَسولَ اللهِ صلى الله عليه وآله، فَسَمَّاهُ إبراهيمَ و حَنَّكَهُ بِتَمرَةٍ، و دَعا لَهُ بالبَرَكَةِ، و دَفَعَهُ إلَيّ.

133. صحيح مسلم عن عائشة: أنّ رسولَ اللهِ صلى الله عليه وآله كانَ يُؤتى‏ بالصّبيانِ فَيُبَرِّكُ عَلَيهِم و يُحَنِّكُهُم.

134. الإمام عليّ عليه السلام: حَنِّكوا أولادَكُم بالتَّمرِ، هكَذا فَعَلَ النَّبِيُّ صلى الله عليه وآله بِالحَسَنِ والحُسَينِ عليهما السلام.

135. الكافي عن يونس عن بعض أصحابه عن أبي جعفر عليه السلام: يُحَنَّكُ المَولودُ بِماءِ الفُراتِ، و يُقامُ في أُذنِهِ.

وفي رِوايةٍ اخرى‏: حَنِّكُوا أولادَكُم بِماءِ الفُراتِ و بِتُربَةِ قَبرِ الحُسَينِ عليه السلام، فَإن لَم يَكُن فَبِماءِ السَّماءِ.

136. الإمام الصادق عليه السلام: حَنِّكوا أولادَكُم بِتُربَةِ الحُسَينِ عليه السلام؛ فَإِنَّها أمانٌ.

137. الإمام الرضا عليه السلام- فِي الفِقهِ المَنسوبِ إلَيهِ‏ وحَنِّكهُ بِماءِ الفُراتِ إن قَدَرتَ عَلَيهِ أو بِالعَسَلِ ساعَةَ يولَدُ.

1.5: Naming

A- Choosing a Good Name

138. Imam al-Kazim (a.s.) said: “Someone came to the Prophet (s.a.w.) and said: “O Messenger of Allah! What is the right of my child?”

He answered: “Choosing a good name for him, raising him well and facilitating a good life for him.”24

139. Imam al-Kazim (a.s.) said: “The first act of benevolence a man has to his child is choosing a good name for him, so every one of you must choose a good name for your child.”25

تَحسينُ الاسمِ‏

138. الإمام الكاظم عليه السلام: جاءَ رَجُلٌ إِلَى النَّبِيّ صلى الله عليه وآله، فَقالَ: يا رَسولَ اللهِ، ما حَقُّ ابنِي هذا؟

قالَ: تُحْسِنُ اسمَهُ و أدَبَهُ، وَضَعهُ مَوضِعَا حَسَناً.

139. عنه عليه السلام: أَوَّلُ ما يَبَرُّ الرَّجُلُ وَلَدَهُ أَن يُسَمِّيَهُ بِاسمٍ حَسَنٍ، فَليُحْسِن أَحَدُكُم اسمَ وَلَدِهِ.

B- Choosing a Name before the Birth

140. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said: “Choose a name for your children before they are born. If you do not know whether the child is a male or a female, call them by the names which are good for both a male and a female, for the miscarriaged foetus will meet you on Judgment Day while you have not chosen a name for it, the miscarriage will say to its father: “Why didn’t you choose a name for me? Verily, the Messenger of Allah gave the name to MuÎsin before he was born.”26

تَسمِيَةُ الوَلَدِ قَبلَ أَن يولَدَ

140. الإمام عليّ عليه السلام: سَمّوا أَولادَكُم قَبلَ أَن يولَدوا، فَإن لَم تَدروا أَذَكَرٌ أَم انثى‏ فَسَمُّوهُم بِالأَسماءِ الَّتي تَكُونُ لِلذَّكَرِ وَ الانثى‏؛ فَإِنَّ أَسقاطَكم إذا لَقوكُم يَومَ القِيامَةِ و لَم تُسَمُّوهُم يَقولُ السِّقطُ لِأَبيهِ: ألّا سَمَّيتَني؟ و قَد سَمَّى‏ رَسولُ اللهِ صلى الله عليه وآله مُحسِنا قَبلَ أَن يولَد!

C- The Ahlul Bayt’s Tradition in Naming

141. Sunan al-Tirmidhi, narrating from ‘Amr ibn Shu’ayb, from his father from his grandfather who said: “Verily, the Prophet (s.a.w.) commanded the choosing of a name for a newborn on the seventh day [after his birth], and cutting the hair from him and offering a sacrifice.”27

سُنَّةُ أَهلِ البَيتِ فِي التَّسمِيَةِ

141. سنن الترمذي عن عمرو بن شعيب عن أبيه عن جدّه: أَنَّ النَّبِيَّ صلى الله عليه وآله أَمَرَ بِتَسمِيَةِ المَولودِ يَومَ سابِعِهِ، و وَضعِ الأَذى‏ عَنهُ، وَالعَقِّ.

D- The Best of Names and the Rights of Some of Them

142. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “The blessed names are: ‘Abdullah, ‘Abd al-Rahman and similar names that denote the servitude to Allah.”28

143. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “Indeed, the best of names are: ‘Abdullah, ‘Abd al-Rahman, Harithah and Hammam.”29

144. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “If you name the child Muhammad, honour him, make room for him in gatherings and do not frown at him.”30

145. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “If you name anyone Muhammad, do not disgrace him, do not frown at him and do not beat him. Blessed be the house that has a Muhammad, the gathering that has a Muhammad, and a company of friends that has a Muhammad.”31

146. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “There is no house that has the name Muhammad in it that will not be increased in its sustenance by Allah. So, if you have named a child Muhammad, you must not beat or insult him.”32

147. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “You name someone Muhammad and then you insult him!?”33

148. al-Kafi, narrating from al-Sakuni who said: “I went to Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) while I was sad and upset, and he said to me: “O’ Sakuni, why are you sad?”

I said: “A daughter has been born to me.”

He said: “O’ Sakuni, her weight is on the earth and her sustenance is from Allah. She lives outside the span of your lifetime, and she eats other than your sustenance.”

By Allah, he relieved me, and then he said: “What did you name her?”

I said: “Fatimah.”

He said: “Excellent!” Then he put his hand on his forehead and said: “The Messenger of Allah said: “The rights of the child on the father is that if the child is a male, the father should honour his mother, choose a good name for him, teach him the Book of Allah, purify him and teach him swimming. And if the child is a female, he should honour her mother, choose a good name for her, teach her [from] the Chapter of the Light, not teach her [from] the Chapter of Joseph^34, not to place her in an upstairs room^35, and to hasten in sending her to the house of her husband [for marriage].”

‘Be careful! Since you have named her Fatimah, you should not insult her, nor curse her, nor beat her.”36

149. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “He who is given four boys and does not name one of them Muhammad, has indeed been disloyal to me.”37

150. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “Name [your children] with the names of prophets.”38

151. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “There is no family wherein there is the name of a Divine Prophet save that Allah sends an angel to them to sanctify them from the morning prayer until evening.”39

152. Imam al-Baqir (a.s.) said: “The best name is the one which indicates the servitude^40 [of Allah], and the best of them are the names of prophets.”41

153. Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) said: “There is no child that is born to us and not named Muhammad, and when seven days have passed, we keep the name if we want or we change it.”42

154. Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) said: “Someone came to the Prophet (s.a.w.) and said: “O Messenger of Allah! A child has been born to me, so what do I name him?” He said: “Name him by the dearest of names to me: Hamzah.”43

155. al-Kafi, narrating from ‘Abd al-Rahman ibn Muhammad ‘Azrami who said: “Mu’awiyah appointed Marwan ibn al-Hakam as the governor of Medina and ordered him to assign a salary for the young ones of Quraysh, and he did.”

Imam Zayn al-’Abidin [al-Sajjad] said: “I went to him and he asked: “What is your name?” I answered: “‘Ali ibn al-Husayn.” He asked: “What is your brother’s name?” I answered: “‘Ali.”

He said: ‘‘‘Ali and ‘Ali! What was your father after by naming all his sons ‘Ali?”

Then he paid my salary and I returned to my father [Imam Husayn] and told him what happened. He said: “Woe to the son of the blue-eyed^44 woman and [animal] skin tanner. If I were given one hundred sons, I would name them nothing but ‘Ali.”45

156. Tafsir al-’Ayyashi, narrating from Rib’i ibn ‘Abdullah who said: “Abu ‘Abdullah [al-Sadiq] (a.s.) was asked: “May I be your ransom! We name [our offspring] by your names and the names of your fathers, does this benefit us?”

He said: “By Allah, yes it does, and is religion anything but love? Allah has said: ‘… If you love Allah, then follow me, Allah will love you and forgive your sins… ”46 47

157. al-Kafi, narrating from Ibn Mayyah from Fulan ibn Hamid who said that he asked and sought advice from Abu ‘Abdullah [al-Sadiq] (a.s.) about the name of his son. The Imam said: “Name him by a name that indicates servitude.”

He said: “What are those names?”

He (a.s.) said: “[Names] like ‘Abd al-Rahman.”48

158. Imam al-Kazim (a.s.) said: “Poverty will not enter the house that has someone from the men with the name of Muhammad, Ahmad, ‘Ali, Hasan, Husayn, Ja’far, Talib, or ‘Abdullah, or from among the women with the name Fatimah.”49

159. Imam Hasan al-’Askari (a.s.) said to Ja’far ibn Sharif al-Jurjani: “May Allah give gratitude to Abu Ishaq Ibrahim ibn Isma’il for his service to our followers, and may He forgive his sins and bless him with a good son who believes in the truth. Tell him that al-Hasan ibn ‘Ali says: “Name your son Ahmad.”50

160. Kashf al-Ghummah, narrating from Ja’far ibn Muhammad al-Qalanisi, who said: “My brother Muhammad wrote to Abu Muhammad [al-’Askari] (a.s.) while his wife was pregnant and close to delivering and had asked him (a.s.) to pray to Allah to relieve her [from pain] and to bless him with a son and to choose a name for the newborn. The Imam wrote back in answer to him, praying to Allah for his well being and said: “May Allah bestow upon you a healthy son, and Muhammad and ‘Abd al-Rahman are good names.”

Then his wife gave birth to twins and he named one of them Muhammad and the other ‘Abd al-Rahman.”51

أفضَلُ الأَسماءِ و حَقُّ بَعضِها

142. رسول الله صلى الله عليه وآله‏ نِعمَ الأَسماءُ: عَبدُ اللهِ و عَبدُ الرَّحمنِ؛ الأَسماءُ المُعَبَّدَةُ.

143. عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: ألا إِنّ خَيرَ الأَسماءِ: عَبدُ اللهِ و عَبدُ الرَّحمنِ و حارِثَةُ و هَمّامٌ.

144. عنه صلى الله عليه وآله‏ «إِذا سَمَّيتُمُ الوَلَدَ مُحَمَّداً فَأَكرِمُوه، و أَوسِعوا لَه فِي المَجلِسِ، و لا تُقَبِّحوا لَهُ وَجها.

145. عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: إِذا سَمَّيتُم مُحَمَّدا فلا تُقَبِّحوهُ، و لا تَجبَهوهُ، و لا تَضرِبوهُ، بورِكَ لِبَيتٍ فيهِ مُحَمَّدٌ، و مَجلِسٍ فيهِ مُحَمَّدٌ، و رِفقَةٍ فيها مُحَمَّدٌ.

146. عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: ما مِن بَيتٍ فيهِ اسمُ مُحَمَّدٍ الّا أَوسَعَ اللهُ عَلَيهِمُ الرِّزقَ، فَإِذا سَمَّيتُموهُم فَلا تَضرِبوهُم، و لا تَشتِموهُم.

147. عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: تُسَمُّونَ مُحَمَّداً ثُمَّ تَسُبّونَهُ!

148. الكافي عَنِ السَّكونِي: دَخَلتُ عَلى‏ أَبي عَبدِ اللهِ عليه السلام وأَنَا مَغمومٌ مَكروبٌ، فَقالَ لي: يا سَكونِيُ مِمّا غَمُّكَ؟

قُلتُ: وُلِدَت لي ابنَةٌ!

فَقالَ: يا سَكونِيُ، عَلَى الأَرضِ ثِقلُها، وعَلَى اللهِ رِزقُها، تَعيشُ في غَيرِ أَجَلِكَ، و تَأكُلُ مِن غَيرِ رِزقِكَ.

فَسُرِّيَ وَ اللهِ عَنِّي. فَقالَ لِي: ما سَمَّيتَها؟

قُلتُ: فاطِمَةَ.

قالَ: آهٍ آهٍ! ثُمَّ وَضَعَ يَدَهُ عَلى جَبهَتِهِ فَقالَ: قالَ رَسولُ اللهِ صلى الله عليه وآله: «حَقُّ الوَلَدِ عَلى والِدِهِ إِذا كانَ ذَكَرا أَن يَستَفرِهَ‏ أُمَّهُ، و يَستَحسِنَ اسمَهُ، و يُعَلِّمَهُ كِتابَ اللهِ، و يُطَهِّرَهُ، و يُعَلِّمَهُ السِّباحَةَ، و إِذا كَانَت انثى أَن يَستَفرِهَ أُمَّها، و يَستَحسِنَ اسمَها، و يُعَلِّمَها سورَةَ النّورِ، و لا يُعَلِّمها سورَةَ يوسُفَ، و لا يُنزِلَهَا الغُرَفَ‏ ، و يُعَجِّلَ سَراحَها إِلى بَيتِ زَوجِها».

أَما إِذا سَمَّيتَها فاطِمَةَ فَلا تَسُبَّها، و لا تَلْعَنها و لا تَضرِبها.

149. رسول الله صلى الله عليه وآله‏ مَن وُلِدَ لَهُ أَربَعَةُ أَولادٍ لَم يُسَمِّ أَحَدَهُم بِاسمي، فَقَد جَفاني.

150. عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: تَسَمَّوا بِأَسماءِ الأَنبِياءِ.

151. عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: ما مِن أَهلِ بَيتٍ فيهِم اسمُ نَبِيٍ إلّا بَعَثَ اللهُ إِلَيهِم مَلَكا يُقَدِّسُهُم مِن صَلاةِ الغَداةِ إلَى العِشاءِ.

152. الإمام الباقر عليه السلام: أَصدَقُ الأَسماءِ ما سُمِّيَ بِالعُبودِيَّةِ ، و أَفضَلُها أَسماءُ الأَنبِياءِ.

153. الإمام الصادق عليه السلام: لا يولَدُ لَنا وَلَدٌ إلّا سَمَّيناهُ مُحَمَّدا، فَإِذا مَضى لَنا سَبعَةُ أَيّامٍ فَإِن شِئنا غَيَّرنا، و إِن شِئنا تَرَكنا.

154. عنه عليه السلام: جاءَ رَجُلٌ إِلَى النَّبِيِ صلى الله عليه وآله، فَقالَ: يا رَسولَ اللهِ، وُلِدَ لي غُلامٌ فَماذا اسَمِّيهِ؟ قالَ: سَمِّهِ بِأَحَبِّ الأَسماءِ إلَيَ: حَمزَةَ.

155. الكافي عن عَبدِ الرَّحمنِ بنِ مُحمَّد العَزرمِيّ: استَعمَلَ مُعاوِيَةُ مَروانَ بنَ الحَكَمِ عَلَى المَدينَةِ، و أمَرَهُ أَن يَفرِضَ لِشَبابِ قُرَيشٍ، فَفَرَضَ لَهُم.

فَقالَ عَلِيُّ بنُ الحُسَينِ عليه السلام: فَأَتَيتُهُ فَقالَ: مَا اسمُكَ؟

فَقُلتُ عَليُ بنُ الحُسَينِ.

فَقالَ ما اسمُ أَخيكَ؟

فَقُلتُ: عَلِيّ.

قالَ: عَلِيّ و عَلِيّ! ما يُريدُ أَبوكَ أَن يَدَعَ أَحَدا مِن وُلدِهِ إلّا سَمّاهُ عَلِيّاً؟ ثُمَّ فَرَضَ لي، فَرَجَعتُ إِلى أَبي فَأَخبَرتُهُ. فَقالَ: وَيلي عَلَى ابنِ الزَّرقاءِ دَبّاغَةِ الأدَمِ، لَو وُلِدَ لي مِئَةٌ لأَحبَبتُ أَن لا اسَمِّيَ أَحَداً مِنهُم إِلّا عَلِيّاً.

156. تفسير العياشي عن ربعي بن عبدالله: قيلَ لِأَبي عَبدِ اللهِ عليه السلام: جُعِلتُ فِداكَ إِنّا نُسَمِّي بِأَسمائِكُم و أَسماءِ آبائِكُم، فَيَنفَعُنا ذلِكَ؟

فَقالَ: إِي وَ اللهِ، و هَلِ الدّينُ إلّا الحُبُّ؟ قالَ اللهُ: «إِنْ كُنْتُمْ تُحِبُّونَ اللَّهَ فَاتَّبِعُونِي يُحْبِبْكُمُ اللَّهُ وَ يَغْفِرْ لَكُمْ ذُنُوبَكُمْ» .

157. الكافي عن ابنِ مَيَّاحٍ، عَن فُلانِ بنِ حَميدٍ: أَنَّهُ سَأَلَ أَبا عَبدِ اللهِ عليه السلام وشاوَرَهُ فِي اسمِ وَلَدِهِ، فَقالَ: سَمِّهِ بِأَسماءٍ مِنَ العُبُودِيَّةِ. فَقالَ: أَيّ الأَسماءِ هُوَ؟ فَقالَ: عَبدُ الرَّحمنِ.

158. الإمام الكاظم عليه السلام: لا يَدخُلُ الفَقرُ بَيتا فيهِ اسمُ مُحَمَّدٍ أَو أَحمَدَ أَو عَلِيٍ أَوِ الحَسَنِ أَوِ الحُسَينِ أَو جَعفَرٍ أَو طالِبٍ أَو عَبدِ اللهِ، أَو فاطِمَةَ مِنَ النِّساءِ.

159. الإمام العسكري عليه السلام- لِجَعفَرِ بنِ الشَّريفِ الجُرجانِيّ-: شَكَرَ اللهُ لِأَبي إِسحاقَ إِبراهيمَ بنِ إسماعيلَ صَنيعَتَهُ إِلى شيعَتِنا، و غَفَرَ لَهُ ذُنوبَهُ، و رَزَقَهُ ذَكَراً سَوِيّاً قائِلًا بِالحَقِّ، فَقُل لَهُ: يَقولُ لَكَ الحَسَنُ بنُ عَليّ: سَمِّ ابنَكَ أَحمَدَ.

160. كَشفُ الغمّة عن جعفر بن محمد القلانِسي: كَتَبَ مُحَمَّدٌ أَخي إِلى أَبي مُحَمَّدٍ عليه السلام وَ امرَأَتُهُ حامِلٌ مُقرِبٌ أَن يَدعُوَ اللهَ أَن يُخَلِّصَها و يَرزُقَهُ ذَكَراً، و يُسَمِّيَهُ. فَكَتَبَ يَدعُو اللهَ بِالصَّلاحِ وَ يَقولُ: رَزَقَكَ اللهُ ذَكَراً سَوِيّاً، و نِعمَ الاسمُ مُحَمَّدٌ و عَبدُ الرَّحمنِ. فَوَلَدَت اثنَين … فَسَمَّى واحِداً مُحَمَّداً، وَ الآخَرَ … عَبدَ الرَّحمنِ.

E- Inappropriate Names

161. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “Do not name your children Hakam and Abu al-Hakam, for Allah is the Hakam (Arbitrator).”52

162. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “Do not name your son: Yasar, Rabah, Najih, or Aflah.”53

163. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “The worst names are: Dirar, Murrah, Harb, and Zalim.”54

164. Majma’ al-Zawa’id, narrating from ‘Abd al-Rahman ibn Abu Sabrah who said: “My father and I went to the Prophet (s.a.w.) who asked my father: “Is this your son?”

He answered: “Yes.”

He (s.a.w.) asked: “What is his name?”

He answered: “al-Hubab.”

He (s.a.w.) said: “Do not call him al-Hubab, for al-Hubab is Satan, but rather he [your son] is ‘Abd al-Rahman.”55

165. al-Mu‘jam al-Kabir, narrating from Ibn Buraydah from his father who said: “The Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.) prohibited anyone to be called Kalb (dog) or Kulaib.”56

F- The reason for the Reproaching of Certain Names
166. Sunan Abu Dawud, narrating from Muhammad ibn ‘Amr ibn ‘Ata’ who said: “Zainab bint Abu Salamah asked him [Muhammad ibn ‘Amr ibn ‘Ata’]: “What did you name your daughter?”

He said: “I named her Barrah (Righteous).”

She said: “Verily, the Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.) reproached this name: I was named Barrah and the Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.) said: “Do not admire yourselves. Allah is more aware of the righteous ones among you.”

They said: “Then what do we call her?”

He answered: “Name her Zainab!”57

الأسماءُ المَذمومَةُ

161. رسول الله صلى الله عليه وآله: لا تُسَمّوا أَولادَكُم الحَكَمَ، و لا أَبَا الحَكَمِ؛ فَإِنَّ اللهَ هُوَ الحَكَمُ.

162. عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: لا تُسَمِّيَنَّ غُلامَكَ يَساراً، و لا رَباحاً، و لا نَجيحاً، و لا أفلَحَ.

163. عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: شَرُّ الأَسماءِ: ضِرارٌ، و مُرَّةُ، و حَربٌ، و ظالِمٌ.

164. مجمع الزوائد عن عبد الرحمن بن أبي سبرة: دَخَلتُ أنَا وَ أَبي عَلى رَسولِ الله صلى الله عليه وآله فَقالَ لِأَبي: هذا ابنُكَ؟ قُلتُ: نَعَم. قالَ: مَا اسمُهُ؟ قالَ: الحُبابُ.

قالَ: لا تُسَمِّهِ الحُبابَ؛ فَإِنَّ الحُبابَ شَيطانٌ، وَ لكِن هُوَ عَبدُ الرَّحمنِ.

165. المعجم الكبير عن ابن بريدة عن أبيه: نَهى رَسولُ الله صلى الله عليه وآله أَن يُسَمَّى كَلبٌ أَو كُلَيبٌ.

و سَبَبُ النَّهيِ عَن بَعضِ الأَسماءِ

166. سنن أبي داوود: عن مُحَمَّدِ بنِ عَمرو بنِ عَطاءٍ: أنَّ زَينَبَ بِنتَ أبي سَلمَةَ سَأَلَتهُ: ما سَمَّيتَ أبنَتَكَ؟ قالَ سَمَّيتُها بَرَّةً.

قالَت: إِنَّ رَسولَ اللهِ صلى الله عليه وآله قَد نَهى‏ عَن هذَا الاسمِ، سُمِّيتُ بَرَّةً، فَقالَ رَسولُ اللهِ صلى الله عليه وآله: لا تُزَكُّوا أَنفُسَكُم، اللهُ أَعلَمُ بِأَهلِ البِرِّ مِنكُم. فَقالوا: ما نُسَمِّيها؟ قالَ: سَمُّوها زَينَبَ.

1.6: Shaving the Head

167. When Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) was asked about the reason for shaving the head of a baby, he answered: “To clean the head from the hair [the term period] of the womb.”58

168. al-Kafi, narrating from ‘Ali ibn Ja’far asking Imam al-Kazim: “I asked him about a newborn child and whether his head is to be shaved after the seventh day?” He (a.s.) said: “If seven days have passed shaving his head is not necessary.”59

حَلْقُ الرَّأسِ‏

167. الإمام الصادق عليه السلام- و سُئِلَ عَن عِلَّةِ حَلقِ رَأسِ المَولودِ فَقالَ-: تَطهيرُهُ مِن شَعرِ الرَّحِمِ.

168. الكافي عن عليّ بن جعفر عن الإمام الكاظم عليه السلام، قالَ: سَأَلتُهُ عَن مَولودٍ يُحلَقُ رَأسُهُ بَعدَ يَومِ السّابِعِ؟ فَقالَ: إِذا مَضى سَبعَةُ أَيامٍ فَلَيسَ عَلَيهِ حَلقٌ.

1.7: Giving an Offering for a Child

169. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “Every boy is held in pledge of his offering (‘Aqiqah) which should be sacrificed for him on the seventh day [after his birth].”60

170. Imam al-Baqir (a.s.) said: “On the seventh day of the birth of a child, a boy or a girl, one should sacrifice a sheep, a male sheep for the boy and an ewe for the girl. Sacrifice [an offering] and give a part of the offering to the midwife, and name him on the seventh day.”61

171. Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) said: “When the child is born, an offering is to be sacrificed for him, his head is to be shaved and some silver equal to the weight of his hair should be given as alms. The foot and the leg [of the offering] should be gifted to the midwife and some Muslims should be invited to eat [from it] and pray for the child, then he should be named on the seventh day [after his birth].”62

172. Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) said: “Every newborn child is in the pledge of an offering.”63

173. Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) said: “The offering of sacrifice is done on the seventh day, and the foot of the sheep and its leg is given to the midwife, and its bones should not be broken.”64

174. Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) said: “When performing the offering, say over it: “In the name of Allah, and by Allah, O Allah! This is an offering (‘Aqiqah) from so and so, its flesh is for his flesh, its blood is for his blood and its bone is for his bone. O Allah! Appoint it as a shield for the progeny of Muhammad, praise of Allah be upon him and them.”65

175. al-Kafi, narrating from ‘Ammar ibn Musa from Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) asking him: “I asked him about the offering for a child (‘Aqiqah) and how it should be. The Imam (a.s.) answered: “… one fourth of it is given to the midwife and if there was no midwife, it’s given to its mother to give it to anyone she desires, and from it she should feed ten Muslims and it is better if they are more then.”66

176. al-Kafi, narrating from Abu al-Sabbah al-Kanani who said: “I asked Abu ‘Abdullah [al-Sadiq] (a.s.) about a newborn child and when an offering should be done for him, when his head should be shaved, when the alms equal to the weight of his hair is given and when should a name be given to him?”

He (a.s.) answered: “They should all be done on the seventh day.”67

177. al-Kafi, narrating from Jamil ibn Darraj who said: “I asked Abu ‘Abdullah [al-Sadiq] (a.s.) about the sacrifice (‘Aqiqah) and which one should be done first, the offering, shaving the head, or naming the child?”

He (a.s.) answered: “All of these are done at the same time, the shaving, the offering, and the naming.”

Then he mentioned what Fatimah (a.s.) had done for her child. After that he said: “The hair must be weighed and silver equal to its weight is to be given as alms.”68

178. al-Kafi, narrating from Ishaq ibn ‘Ammar who asked Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) about the offering for the child, shaving his head, or alms- giving, saying: “I asked him: “Which of them do we start with?”

He answered: “Shave his head, offer the sacrifice for him, and then give silver equal to the weight of his hair as alms, and all of these are done in one place.”69

العَقيقَةُ

169. رسول الله صلى الله عليه وآله: كُلُّ غُلامٍ رَهينَةٌ بِعَقيقَتِهِ، يُذبَحُ عَنهُ يَومَ سابِعِهِ.

170. الإمام الباقر عليه السلام‏ إِذا كانَ يَومُ السّابِعِ وقَد وُلِدَ لأَحَدِكُم غُلامٌ أو جارِيَةٌ فَليَعُقَّ عَنهُ كَبشاً؛ عَنِ الذَّكَرِ ذَكَراً، و عَنِ الانثى مِثلَ ذلِكَ، عُقّوا عَنهُ و أطعِمُوا القابِلَةَ مِنَ العَقيقَةِ، و سَمّوهُ يَومَ السّابِعِ.

171. الإمام الصادق عليه السلام: المَولودُ إِذا وُلِدَ عُقَّ عَنهُ و حُلِقَ رَأسُهُ، و تُصُدِّقَ بِوَزنِ شَعرِهِ وَرِقا، و اهدِيَ إِلَى القابِلَةِ الرِّجلُ و الوَرِكُ، و يُدعَى نَفَرٌ مِنَ المُسلِمينَ فَيَأكُلونَ و يَدعون لِلغُلامِ، و يُسَمّى يَومَ السّابِعِ.

172. عنه عليه السلام: كُلُّ مَولودٍ مُرتَهَنٌ بِالعَقيقَةِ.

173. عنه عليه السلام: العَقيقَةُ يَومَ السابِعِ، و تُعطَى‏ القابِلَةُ الرِّجلَ مَعَ الوَرِكِ، ولا يُكسَرُ العَظمُ.

174. عنه عليه السلام: تَقولُ عَلَى العَقِيقَةِ إذا عَقَقتَ: «بِسمِ اللهِ و بِاللهِ، اللّهُمَّ عَقيقَةٌ عَن فُلانٍ، لَحمُها بِلَحمِهِ، و دَمُها بِدَمِهِ، و عَظمُها بِعَظمِهِ، اللّهُمَّ اجعَلهُ وِقاءً لآِلِ مُحمّدٍ صَلَّى اللهُ عَليهِ و عَلَيهِم».

175. الكافي عن عمّار بن موسى عن الإمام الصادق عليه السلام، قال: سَأَلتُهُ عَنِ العَقيقَةِ عَنِ المَولودِ كَيفَ هِيَ؟

قالَ: … يُعطَى القابِلَةَ رُبعُها، وإن لَم تَكُن قابِلَةٌ فَلِامِّهِ تُعطيها مَن شاءَت، وتُطعِمُ مِنهُ عَشَرَةً مِنَ المُسلِمينَ، فَإِن زادوا فَهُوَ أفضَلُ.

176. الكافي عَن أبي الصّباح الكناني: سَأَلتُ أَبا عَبدِ الله عليه السلام عَنِ الصَّبِيِ المَولُودِ، مَتى يُذبَحُ عَنهُ، و يُحلَقُ رَأسُهُ، و يُتَصَدَّقُ بِوَزنِ شَعرِهِ، وَيُسَمّى؟

قالَ: كُلُّ ذلِكَ فِي اليَومِ السّابِعِ.

177. الكافي عن جميل بن درّاج: سَأَلتُ أَبا عَبدِ اللهِ عليه السلام عَن العَقيقَةِ وَ الحَلقِ وَ التَّسمِيَةِ بِأَيِّها يُبدَأُ؟ قالَ: يُصنَعُ ذلِكَ كُلُّه في ساعَةٍ واحِدَةٍ، يُحلَقُ و يُذبَحُ و يُسَمّى، ثُمَّ ذَكَرَ ما صَنَعَت فاطِمَةُ عليها السلام لِوُلدِها. ثُمَّ قالَ: يوزَنُ الشَّعرُ، و يُتَصَدَّقُ بِوَزنِهِ فِضَّةً.

178. الكافي عن إسحاق بن عمّار عن الإمام الصادق عليه السلام- فِي العَقِّ عَنِ المَولود و حَلِقِهِ وَ التَّصَدُّقِ عَنهُ- قالَ: قُلتُ لَهُ: بِأَيّ ذلِكَ نَبدَأُ؟ قالَ: تَحلِقُ رَأسَهُ، وتَعِقُّ عَنهُ، و تَصَّدَّقُ بِوَزنِ شَعرِهِ فِضَّةً، و يَكونُ ذلِكَ في مَكانٍ واحِدٍ.

1.8: Circumcision

179. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “Purify your children [by circumcision] on the seventh day, for it is more pleasant and purer, and it causes the flesh to grow faster, and indeed the earth remains polluted for forty days with the urine of he who is not circumcised.”70  71

180. Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) said: “Circumcise your sons on the seventh day, for it is more pure and more haste in the growing of the flesh, and the earth detests the urine of he who is not circumcised.”72

181. Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) said: “Circumcising the boy is of the Sunnah, but female circumcision is not of the Sunnah.”73

182. Kitab Man la Yahdurhu al-Faqih, narrating from Marazim ibn Hakim al-Azdi narrating from Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) who said about when a boy is circumcised: “He (a.s.) said: “He [the father] should say: “O Allah! This is Your tradition and the tradition of Your Prophet, may Your praises be upon him and his progeny, and it is our obedience to You and Your Prophet, by Your wish, Your will and Your decree in an order that You have commanded, a decree You have made certain, and an order You have affirmed. So, I made him taste the hotness [pain] of iron in his circumcision and shedding of blood for a reason You know more of than me. O Allah! Purify him from sins, prolong his lifespan, keep away sicknesses and pains from his body, add to his wealth and repel poverty from him, for surely You know and we do not know.”

Then Abu ‘Abdullah [al-Sadiq] (a.s.) said: “Any man who does not recite this at the time of his son’s circumcision should recite it before he reaches puberty, and if he was to recite it, he will be safeguarded from being killed or harmed by the iron.”74

183. al-Kafi, narrating from ‘Ali ibn Yaqtin who said: “I asked Abu al-Hasan [al-Kazim] (a.s.) about the circumcising of a boy on the seventh day [of his birth], and if it is a Sunnah or can it be postponed?, and which one is better?”

He (a.s.) said: “It is of the Sunnah on the seventh day, and it does not matter if it is delayed.”75

الخِتانُ‏

. 179رسول الله صلى الله عليه وآله: طَهِّروا أَولادَكُم يَومَ السّابِعِ؛ فَإِنَّهُ أَطيَبُ و أَطهَرُ و أَسرَعُ لِنَباتِ اللَّحمِ، و إِنَّ الأَرضَ تَنجُسُ مِن بَولِ الأَغلَفِ أَربَعينَ صَباحا .

180. الإمام الصادق عليه السلام: اختِنوا أَولادَكُم لِسَبعَةِ أَيّامٍ؛ فَإِنَّه أَطهَرُ و أَسرعُ لِنَباتِ اللَّحمِ، وإِنَّ الأَرضَ لَتَكرَهُ بَولَ الأَغلَفِ.

181. عنه عليه السلام: خِتانُ الغُلامِ مِنَ السُّنَّةِ، و خفضُ الجَوارِي لَيسَ مِنَ السُّنَّةِ.

182. كتاب من لا يحضره الفقيه عن مرازم بن حكيم الازديّ عن الإمام الصادق عليه السلام- فِي الصَّبِيِّ إِذا خُتِنَ، قالَ-: يَقولُ:

اللّهُمَّ هذِهِ سُنَّتُكَ، و سُنَّةُ نَبِيِّكَ صَلواتُكَ عَلَيهِ و آلِهِ، وَ اتِّباعٌ مِنَّا لَكَ و لِنَبِيِّكَ، بِمَشِيَّتِكَ و بِإِرادَتِكَ و قَضائِكَ؛ لأَمرٍ أنتَ أرَدتَهُ، و قَضاءٍ حَتَمتَهُ، و أمرٍ أنفَذتَهُ، فَأَذَقتُهُ حَرَّ الحَديدِ في خِتانِهِ و حِجامَتِهِ لِأمرٍ أنتَ أعرَفُ بِهِ مِنِّي، اللّهُمَّ فَطَهِّرهُ مِنَ الذُّنوبِ، و زِد في عُمُرِهِ، وَ ادفَعِ الآفاتِ عَن بَدَنِهِ، وَ الأَوجاعَ عَن جِسمِهِ، و زِدهُ مِنَ الغِنى، وَ ادفَع عَنهُ الفَقرَ، فَإِنَّكَ تَعلَمُ و لا نَعلَمُ.

و قالَ أبو عَبدِ اللهِ عليه السلام: أيُّ رَجُلٍ لَم يَقُلها عِندَ خِتانِ وَلَدِهِ فَليَقُلها عَلَيهِ مِن قَبلِ أَن يَحتَلِمَ، فَإِن قالَها كُفِيَ حَرَّ الحَديدِ مِن قَتلٍ أو غَيرِهِ.

183. الكافي عن عليّ بن يقطين: سَأَلتُ أبَا الحَسَنِ عليه السلام عَن خِتانِ الصَّبِيِّ لِسَبعَةِ أيّامٍ؛ مِنَ السُّنَّةِ هُوَ أو يُؤَخَّرُ؟ وأَيُّهُما أفضَلُ؟

قالَ: لِسَبعَةِ أيّامٍ مِنَ السُّنَّةِ، وإِن أُخِّرَ فَلا بَأسَ.

1. Qur’an, 19:15.

2. . Qur’an, 19:33.

3. . Tuhaf al-’Uqul, p. 292. Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 78, p. 171, h. 4.

4. . Nathr al-Durr, vol. 1, p. 345. Nazhah al-Nazir, p. 100, h. 19. Kashf al-Ghummah, vol. 2, p. 362.

5. . Kitab Man la Yahdarhu al-Faqih, vol. 1, p. 194, h. 595.

6. . al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 17, h. 3. Kitab Man la Yahdarhu al-Faqih, vol. 3, p. 480, h. 4687.

7. . A kind of sweet made from flour, water and honey.

8. . al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 281, h. 1. Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 48, p. 110, h. 12.

9. . al-Kafi, vol. 3, p. 40, h. 2. Tahdhib al-Ahkam, vol. 1, p. 104, h. 270. Kitab Man la Yahdarhu al-Faqih, vol. 1, p. 78, h. 176. All narrating from Sama’ah.

10. . It is said that Um al-Sibyan is a kind of sickness in which the person is afflicted with a state that is called ‘wind seized’ and sometimes it causes the person to become unconscious. It has also been said that Um al-Sibyan is a jinn that hurts children. In Persian, Um al-Sibyan refers to the mother of a jinn (hidden creature) and being possessed by a jinn. Refer to: Daneshnameh Pezeshki, vol. 1, p. 677

11. . Musnad Abu Ya’la, vol. 6, p. 181, h. 6747. al-Firdaws, vol. 3, p. 632, h. 5982. Both narrating from Imam al-Husayn (a.s.). Kanz al-Ummal, vol. 16, p. 457, h. 45414.

12. . al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 24, h. 6, narrating from al-Sakuni from Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.).

13. . Sunan Abu Dawud, vol. 4, p. 328, h. 5105. Musnad Ibn Hanbal, vol. 9, p. 230, h.23930.

14. . Kashf al-Ghammah, vol. 2, p. 151. Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 43, p. 255.

15. . al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 23, h. 2, narrating from Hafs al-Kinasi.

16. . al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 23, h. 1. Tahdhib al-Ahkam, vol. 7, p. 436, h. 1738. Both narrating from Abu Yahya al-Razi. Wasa’il al-Shi’ah, vol. 21, p. 137, h. 2.

17. . Jami’ al-Ahadith, p. 141. al-Imamah wa al-Tabsirah, p. 176.

18. . Musnad Abu Ya’la, vol. 6, p. 414, h. 7278. Kanz al-Ummal, vol. 13, p. 268, h. 36788.

19. . Sahih Muslim, vol. 3, p. 1691, h. 27. al-Musannif by Ibn Abu Shaybah, vol. 5, p. 430, h. 4.

20. . al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 24, h. 5, narrating from Abu Basir from Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.). Tahdhib al-Ahkam, vol. 7, p. 427, h. 1741, narrating from Abu Basir. al-Khisal, p. 637, h. 10, narrating from Abu Basir and Muhammad ibn Muslim from Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) from his forefathers (a.s.).

21. . al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 24, h. 3- 4. Tahdhib al-Ahkam, vol. 7, p. 436, h. 1739- 1740.

22. . Tahdhib al-Ahkam, vol. 6, p. 74, h. 143, narrating from al-Husayn ibn Abu Ya’la. al-Da’awat, p. 185, h. 513.

23. . al-Fiqh al-Mansub li Imam al-Ridha (a.s.), p. 239, Mustardak al-Wasa’il, vol. 15, p. 138, h. 17783.

24. . al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 48, h. 1. Tahdhib al-Ahkam, vol. 8, p. 111, h. 384. Both narrating from Durust.

25. . al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 18, h. 3. Tahdhib al-Ahkam, vol. 7, p. 437, h. 1745. Both narrating from Musa ibn Bakr.

26. . al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 18, h. 2, narrating from Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) from his father (a.s.) from his grandfather (a.s.). al-Khisal, p. 634.

27. . Sunan al-Tirmidhi, vol. 5, p. 132, h. 2832.

28. . al-Nawadir, by al-Rawandi, p. 104, h. 75. al-Ja’fariyat, p. 190, with ‘custom’ instead of ‘names that denote the servitude to Allah’. Both narrating from Imam al-Kazim (a.s.) from his forefathers (a.s.). Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 104, p. 130, h. 21.

29. . al-Khisal, p. 251, h. 118, narrating from Jabir from Imam al-Baqir (a.s.). Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 104, p. 127, h. 2.

30. . Tarikh Baghdad, vol. 3, p. 91, narrating from Zaid ibn al-Hasan from his father from Imam ‘Ali (a.s.). Sharh Nahj al-Balaghah, vol. 19, p. 369, narrating from Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) from the Prophet (s.a.w).

31. . Makarim al-Akhlaq, vol. 1, p. 65, h. 67, narrating from Abu Rafay’. Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 16, p. 239.

32. . Tanbih al-Khawatir, vol. 1, p. 32, narrating from Jabir. Sharh Nahj al-Balaghah, vol. 19, p. 366, narrating from Jabir.

33. . Kanz al-Ummal, vol. 16, p. 422, h. 45222, narrating from ‘Abd ibn Hamid from ‘Anas.

34. . Yusuf.

35. . Meaning that a girl should not be put in a room where onlookers can see her.

36. . al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 48, h. 6. Tahdhib al-Ahkam, vol. 8, p. 112, h. 387.

37. . al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 19, h. 6, narrating from ‘Asim al-Kuzi from Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.). Tahdhib al-Ahkam, vol. 7, p. 438, h. 1747, narrating from Imam al-Baqir (a.s.) from the Prophet (S.a.w.).

38. . Sunan Abu Dawud, vol. 4, p. 288, h. 4950. Musnad Abu Ya’la, vol. 6, p. 351, h. 7133. Both narrating from Abu Wahab al-Jashmi.

39. . al-Amali, by al-Tusi, p. 511, h. 1117, narrating from al-Asbagh from Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) from the Prophet (S.a.w.). Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 104, p. 129, h. 14.

40. . Meaning names which begin with the prefix ‘abd, such as: ‘Abdullah, ‘Abd al-Rahman, ‘Abd al-Hadi… .

41. . al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 18, h. 1. Tahdhib al-Ahkam, vol. 7, p. 438, h. 1747.

42. . al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 18, h. 4. Tahdhib al-Ahkam, vol. 7, p. 437, h. 1746. ‘Uddah al-Da’i, p. 77, narrating from Imam al-Ridha (a.s.).

43. . al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 19, h. 9. Tahdhib al-Ahkam, vol. 7, p. 438, h. 1749. Both from Ibn al-Qaddah.

44. . The colour of the eye here does not mean it is a defect, but it is referring to evil features and lewdness.

45. . al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 19, h. 7. Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 44, p. 211, h. 8.

46. . Qur’an, 3:31.

47. . Tafsir al-’Ayyashi, vol. 1, p. 167, h. 28. Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 104, p. 130, h. 19

48. . al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 18, h. 5.

49. . al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 19, h. 8. Tahdhib al-Ahkam, vol. 7, p. 438, h. 1748. Both narrating from Sulayman al-Ja’fari.

50. . al-Khara’ij wa al-Jara’ih, vol. 1, p. 424, h. 4. Kashf al-Ghummah, vol. 3, p. 217. Both narrating from Ja’far ibn al-Sharif al-Jurjani.

51. . Kashf al-Ghummah, vol. 3, p. 208. Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 50, p. 298, h. 72.

52. . ‘Ilal al-Shara’i’, p. 583, h. 23, narrating from Imam ‘Ali (a.s.). Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 76, p. 175, h. 2.

53. . Sahih Muslim, vol. 3, p. 1685, h. 12. Sunan Abu Dawud, vol. 4, p. 290, h. 4958. Both narrating from Samarah ibn Jundab. Kanz al-Ummal, vol. 1, p. 465, h.2023.

54. . al-Khisal, p. 250, h. 118, narrating from Jabir from Imam al-Baqir (a.s.). Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 104, p. 127, h. 2.

55. . Majma’ al-Zawa’id, vol. 3, p. 306, h. 4677.

56. . al-Mu’jam al-Kabir, vol. 2, p. 23, h. 1163. Kanz al-Ummal, vol. 16, p. 424, h. 45234.

57. . Sunan Abu Dawud, vol. 4, p. 288, h. 4953. al-Mu’jam al-Kabir, vol. 24, p. 280, h.709.

58. . Kitab Man la Yahdarhu al-Faqih, vol. 3, p. 489, h. 4728. ‘Ilal al-Shara’i’, p. 505, h. 1. Makarim al-Akhlaq, vol. 1, p. 488, h. 1693.

59. . al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 38, h. 1. Kitab Man la Yahdarhu al-Faqih, vol. 3, p. 489, h. 4729.

60. . Sunan al-Darami, vol. 1, p. 511, h. 1903. al-Sunan al-Kubra, vol. 9, p. 510, h. 19290. Both narrating from Samarah.

61. . al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 27, h. 4. Tahdhib al-Ahkam, vol. 7, p. 442, h. 1769. Wasa’il al-Shi’ah, vol. 15, p. 152, h. 11.

62. . al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 28, h. 5. Tahdhib al-Ahkam, vol. 7, p. 442, h. 1770. Both narrating from Hafs al-Kana’isi.

63. . al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 24, h. 2. Tahdhib al-Ahkam, vol. 7, p. 441, h. 1762. Kitab Man la Yahdarhu al-Faqih, vol. 3, p. 484, h. 4711. All narrating from Abu Khadijah.

64. . al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 29, h. 11. Tahdhib al-Ahkam, vol. 7, p. 443, h. 1772. Both narrating from al-Kahili. Wasa’il al-Shi’ah, vol. 15, p. 150, h. 5.

65. . al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 30, h. 1. Wasa’il al-Shi’ah, vol. 15, p. 154, h. 1.

66. . al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 28, h. 9. Tahdhib al-Ahkam, vol. 7, p. 443, h. 1771.

67. . al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 28, h. 8.

68. . al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 33, h. 4.

69. . al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 27, h. 2. Tahdhib al-Ahkam, vol. 7, p. 442, h. 1767.

70. . Pollution here means performing what is opposite to the Sunnah, and not material impurity and uncleanliness. If the child is not mature (baligh), it refers to the parent’s not following the Sunnah, and if he is mature, then it is his own opposition to the Sunnah.

71. . al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 35, h. 2. Tahdhib al-Ahkam, vol. 7, p. 445, h. 1778. Both narrating from al-Sakuni from Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.).

72. . al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 34, h. 1. Tahdhib al-Ahkam, vol. 7, p. 444, h. 1777. Both narrating from Mas’adah ibn Sadaqah.

73. . al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 37, h. 2. Both narrating from ‘Abdullah ibn Sinan.

74. . Kitab Man la Yahdarhu al-Faqih, vol. 3, p. 488, h. 4726. Wasa’il al-Shi’ah, vol. 15, p. 169, h. 1.

75. . al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 36, h. 7. Tahdhib al-Ahkam, vol. 7, p. 445, h. 1780. Wasa’il al-Shi’ah, vol. 15, p. 165, h. 1.

Part 8

The Rights of a Suckling Infant

During the period of breastfeeding, an infant has two fundamental rights:

1- Suitable Nutrition

According to the recommendations of the great leaders of Islam, the best food for a baby is the mother’s milk. For a suckling child, nothing can be substituted for the mother’s milk. Therefore, one of the rights of a baby is to be breastfed by its mother, if possible.

The Holy Qur’an clearly says that the mothers who are willing to accomplish this duty perfectly must breastfeed their infants for two complete years. According to what is narrated from Imam al-Ridha (a.s), the right of children is that they are breastfed for the minimum of twenty one months, and anything less than that is doing injustice to them.

If the baby cannot suckle the mother’s milk due to any reason, the father must choose a worthy wet-nurse to feed the baby. She must have spiritual and physical exquisiteness, because the milk itself has an effect on the upbringing of the child’s body and soul, and hence narrations have warned against choosing wet-nurses who are deviated in their belief, deeds, and morals, or are suffering from a disease.

2- Respecting the Feelings

Another important aspect to be mentioned in the conduct of the Prophet (s.a.w.) in observing the rights of suckling babies is respecting their feelings. According to a tradition, the messenger of God one day unlike usual, ended his prayers so fast that Muslims thought a new revelation was coming down to him. When they asked him about its reason, they surprisingly heard him say: “Did you not hear the cry of the baby?”

It was realized that the reason for shortening of the prayers was the cry of a restless infant who was beside the people and the Prophet (s.a.w.) shortened the prayers so that they could pacify the baby.

It frequently happened that people brought a baby to the Prophet (s.a.w.) in order that he would recite an invocation for him. The Prophet of Allah (s.a.w.) took the baby in his bosom and, when he was busy reciting invocation, the infant polluted the Prophet’s clothes. People wanted to separate the baby from him so that his clothes might not be more polluted, but he (s.a.w.) did not let them do so.

By these kinds of wise treatments, besides appeasing the child’s family, the Prophet of Allah (s.a.w.) would not allow the feelings of the child to be hurt, as he knew that ignoring the child’s sentiments would have some unpleasant sequels in his future life.

2.1: Being Breastfed from the Mother’s Milk, if Possible

A) The Virtue of Breastfeeding the Infant
184. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “When a woman becomes pregnant, her station will be like a person who fasts during the day and vigilant by night, and she is like a struggler who strives with her soul and wealth in the path of Allah. When she delivers her child, she has such a reward that you do not know what it is because of its magnitude. When she breastfeeds, for every suckle made, she will receive the reward of emancipating one of the children of Isma’il; and when the time of weaning comes an angel will say: “Continue your act [of breastfeeding], for you have been forgiven.”1

185. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “If it were not for hurting their husbands, no pregnant, wet-nursing and compassionate woman who perform prayers, would enter Hellfire.”2

فَضلُ إرضاعِ الوَلَد

184. رسول الله صلى الله عليه وآله: إذا حَمَلَتِ المَرأَةُ كانَت بِمَنزِلَةِ الصّائِمِ القائِم، المُجاهِدِ بِنَفسِهِ و مالِهِ في سَبِيلِ اللهِ، فَإِذا وَضَعَت كانَ لَها مِنَ الأَجرِ ما لا تَدري ما هُوَ لِعِظَمِهِ، فَإذا أرضَعَت كانَ لَها بِكُلِّ مَصَّةٍ كَعِدلِ عِتقِ مُحَرَّرٍ مِن وُلدِ إسماعيلَ، فَإِذا فَرَغَت مِن رَضاعِهِ ضَرَبَ مَلَكٌ عَلى جَنبِها، و قالَ: استَأنِفِي العَمَلَ؛ فَقَد غُفِرَ لَكِ.

185. عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: حامِلاتٌ والِداتٌ مُرضِعاتٌ رَحيماتٌ، لو لا ما يَأتينَ إلى بُعولَتِهِنَّ ما دَخَلَت مُصَلِّيَةٌ مِنهُنَّ النّارَ.

B) The Blessing of the Mother’s Milk
186. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “There is no milk better for an infant than its mother’s milk.”3

187. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said: “There is no milk that the infant feeds on more blessing than its mother’s milk.”4

بَرَكَةُ لَبَنِ الأُمِ‏

186. رسول الله صلى الله عليه وآله: لَيسَ لِلصَّبِيّ لَبَنٌ خَيرٌ مِن لَبَنِ امِّهِ.

187. الإمام عليّ عليه السلام: ما مِن لَبَنٍ يُرضَعُ بِهِ الصَّبِيّ أَعظَمُ بَرَكَةً عَلَيهِ مِن لَبَنِ امِّه.

C) The Duration of Nursing
“And the mothers shall suckle their children for two whole years for the one who desires to complete the period of suckling …”5

“… and We did enjoin upon man concerning his parents, did his mother bear him with fainting upon fainting and his weaning takes two years …”6

188. Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) said: “Nursing is to twenty one months, and anything less than that is injustice to the infant.”7

مُدَّةُ الإِرضاعِ‏

(وَ الْوالِداتُ يُرْضِعْنَ أَوْلادَهُنَّ حَوْلَيْنِ كامِلَيْنِ لِمَنْ أَرادَ أَنْ يُتِمَّ الرَّضاعَةَ).

(وَ وَصَّيْنَا الْإِنْسانَ بِوالِدَيْهِ حَمَلَتْهُ أُمُّهُ وَهْناً عَلى‏ وَهْنٍ وَ فِصالُهُ فِي عامَيْنِ أَنِ اشْكُرْ لِي وَ لِوالِدَيْكَ إِلَيَّ الْمَصِيرُ … ).

188. الإمام الصادق عليه السلام: الرَّضاعُ واحِدٌ و عِشرونَ شَهراً، فَما نَقَصَ فَهُوَ جَورٌ عَلَى الصَّبِيِ.

2.2: Choosing a Righteous Wet-nurse to Breastfeed

189. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said: “Choose [a wet-nurse] for breastfeeding [the infant] the same way that you choose someone for marriage, for milk changes one’s nature.”8

190. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said: “Be aware of the one who breastfeeds your children, for a child will grow up based on that [milk].”9

191. Imam al-Baqir (a.s.) said: “Look for the milk of attractive wet-nurses for your child, and avoid the milk of the unattractive ones, for milk transmits [the characteristics of the wet-nurse to the child].”10

192. Imam al-Baqir (a.s.) said: “Choose clean and affectionate wet-nurses, for milk transmits [the characteristics of the wet-nurse to the child].”11

استِرضاعُ المُرْضِعَةِ الصّالِحَةِ

189. الإمام عليّ عليه السلام: تَخَيَّروا لِلرَّضاعِ كَما تَتَخَيَّرونَ لِلنِّكاحِ؛ فَإِنَّ الرَّضاعَ يُغَيِّرُ الطِّباعَ.

190. الإمام عليّ عليه السلام: انظُروا مَن تُرضِعُ أَولادَكُم؛ فَإِنَّ الوَلَدَ يَشِبُّ عَلَيهِ.

191. الإمام الباقر عليه السلام: استَرضِع لِوَلَدِكَ بِلَبَنِ الحِسانِ، وإيَّاكَ وَ القِباحَ؛ فَإِنَّ اللَّبَنَ قَد يُعدي.

192. عنه عليه السلام: عَلَيكُم بِالوِضاءِ مِن الظُّؤورَةِ ؛ فإنَّ اللَّبَنَ يُعدِي.

2.3: Those Who Should not Be Asked for Suckling

193. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “Avoid letting your children suckle from debauch or insane women, for milk transmits [the characteristics of the wet-nurse to the child].”12

194. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “Do not ask a foolish, blear-eyed or sick woman to breastfeed [your child], for milk transmits [the characteristics of the wet-nurse to the child].”13

195. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “Do not ask a foolish woman to breastfeed [your child], for milk transmits [the characteristics of the wet-nurse to the child] and the child will become resemblant to the milk, meaning in foolishness and idiocy.”14

196. al-Kafi: From ‘Ubaydullah al-Halabi who said: “I asked Abu ‘Abdullah [al-Sadiq] (a.s.): “Can I get a woman who is born from an adulterine person to breastfeed.” He answered: “No. Ask neither her nor her daughter to breastfeed.”15

مَنْ لا يَنبَغِي اسْتِرْضاعُهُ‏

193. رسول الله صلى الله عليه وآله: تَوَقَّوا عَلى أولادِكُم لَبَنَ البَغِيِ‏ مِنَ النِّساءِ والمَجنونَةِ؛ فَإِنَّ اللَّبَنَ يُعدِي.

194. عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: لا تَستَرضِعُوا الحَمقاءَ ولَا العَمشاءَ ؛ فَإِنَّ اللَّبَنَ يُعدِي.

195. عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: لا تَستَرضِعُوا الحَمقاءَ؛ فَإِنَّ اللَّبَنَ يُعدي، وإنَّ الغُلامَ يَنزَعُ‏ إلَى اللَّبَنِ؛ يَعني إلَى الظِّئرِ فِي الرُّعونَةِ وَالحُمق.

196. الكافي عن عبيد الله الحلبي: قُلتُ لِأبي عَبدِ اللهِ عليه السلام: امرَأَةٌ وُلِدَت مِنَ الزِّنا، أتَّخِذُها ظِئرا؟

قالَ: لا تَستَرضِعها، ولَا ابنَتَها.

2.4: Feeding the Child Beneficial Foods

197. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said: “Give pomegranate to your children, for it will make their teeth grow more rapidly.”16

198. Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) said: “Give pomegranate to your children, for it will make them become mature faster.”17

199. al-Mahasin, narrating from Khidr who said: “I was at the presence of Abu ‘Abdullah [al-Sadiq] (a.s.) when one of his followers came to him and said: “Our children are [usually] born light weighted and weak.” The Imam said: “Why do you not give them Sawiq,18 for it hardens the bone and makes the flesh grow.”19

إطْعامُ الْأغذِيَةِ النّافِعَةِ

197. الإمام عليّ عليه السلام: أَطعِموا صِبيانَكُم الرُّمّانَ؛ فَإنَّهُ أسرَعُ لِألسِنَتِهِم.

198. الإمام الصادق عليه السلام‏ أَطعِموا صِبيانَكُم الرُّمّانَ؛ فَإنَّهُ أسرَعُ لِشَبابِهِم.

199. المحاسن عن خضر: كُنتُ عِندَ أبي عَبدِ اللهِ عليه السلام، فَأتاهُ رَجُلٌ مِن أصحابِنا فَقالَ لَهُ: يولَدُ لَنَا المَولودُ فَيَكونُ مِنهُ القِلَّةُ وَالضَّعفُ، فَقالَ: ما يَمنَعُكَ مِنَ السَّويقِ‏ فَإِنَّهُ يَشُدُّ العَظمَ، ويُنبِتُ اللَّحمَ؟

2.5: Respecting the Infant’s Feelings

200.  Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) said: “The Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.) while performing the noon and afternoon prayer finished the [last] two units quickly. When he finished, people asked him: “O Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.)! Has something new about prayer been sent down?” He said: “Why are you asking?” They answered: “You performed the last two units quickly.” He said: “Did you not hear the cry of a child?!”20

201. Makarim al-Akhlaq: People used to bring children to the Prophet (s.a.w.) for him to pray for them to be blessed and to give them a name. He (s.a.w.) used to hold them in his arms out of honour to their families. Sometimes it happened that the child would pass urine [on his (s.a.w.) clothes] and those who saw this would call out, but he (s.a.w.) would say: “Do not interrupt the child.” So, they would leave the child to finish. Then he (s.a.w.) would continue to finish his prayer for the child or naming him, bringing happiness to their family in such a way that they never felt that he (s.a.w.) was displeased by the child’s urinating. Then, when they left, he would wash his clothes.”21

202. Musnad Ibn Hanbal, narrating from ‘A’ishah who said: “Children were often brought to the Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.) and he would pray for them. One time, an infant who was brought to him urinated and the Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.) said: “Pour some water on it.”22

احْتِرامُ شُعورِ الرَّضيعِ‏

200. الإمام الصادق عليه السلام: صَلَّى رَسولُ اللهِ صلى الله عليه وآله الظُّهرَ وَالعَصرَ فَخَفَّفَ الصَّلاةَ فِي الرَّكعَتَينِ، فَلَمَّا انصَرَفَ قالَ لَهُ النّاسُ: يا رسولَ اللهِ أحَدَثَ فِي الصَّلاةِ شَي‏ءٌ؟ قالَ: وما ذاكَ؟ قالوا: خَفَّفتَ فِي الرَّكعَتَينِ الأَخيرَتَينِ! فَقالَ لَهُم: أمَا سَمِعتُم صُراخَ الصَّبِيِ؟!.

201. مكارم الأخلاق: كانَ صلى الله عليه وآله يُؤتى‏ بِالصَّبِيّ الصَّغيرِ لِيَدعُوَ لَهُ بِالبَرَكَةِ أو يُسَمِّيَهُ، فَيَأخُذُهُ فَيَضَعُهُ في حِجرِهِ؛ تَكرِمَةً لِأَهلِهِ، فَرُبَّما بالَ الصَّبِيّ عَلَيهِ، فَيَصيحُ بَعضُ مَن رَآهُ حينَ بالَ، فَيقولُ صلى الله عليه وآله: لا تُزرِموا بالصَّبِيّ، فَيَدَعُهُ حَتَّى يَقضِيَ بَولَهُ، ثُمَّ يُفرِغُ لَهُ مِن دُعائِهِ أو تَسمِيَتِهِ، ويَبلُغُ سُرورُ أهلِهِ فيهِ، ولا يَرَونَ أَنَّهُ يَتَأذَّى بِبَولِ صَبِيِّهِم، فَإِذا انصَرَفوا غَسَلَ ثَوبَهُ بَعدُ.

202. مسند ابن حنبل عن عائشة: كانَ رَسولُ اللهِ صلى الله عليه وآله يُؤتى‏ بِالصِّبيانِ فَيَدعُو لَهُم، وإنَّهُ أُتِيَ بِصَبِيّ فَبالَ عَلَيهِ، فَقالَ رَسولُ اللهِ صلى الله عليه وآله: صُبُّوا عَلَيهِ الماءَ صَبّاً.

1. al-Amali, by al-Saduq, p. 496, h. 678, narrating from Abu Khalid al-Ka’bi from Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.). Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 104, p. 106, h. 1.

2. . al-Kafi, vol. 5, p. 514, h. 2, narrating from Abu Basir from Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.). Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 22, p. 146, h. 138. al-Mu’jam al-Kabir, vol. 8, p. 253, h. 7989, narrating from Abu UmÁmah. Kanz al-Ummal, vol. 16, p. 407, h. 45133.

3. . ‘Uyun Akhbar al-Ridha (a.s.), vol. 2, p. 34, h. 69. Sahifah al-Imam al-Ridha (a.s.), p. 101, h. 42. Both narrating from Ahmad ibn ‘Amir ibn Sulayman al-Ta’i from Imam al-Ridha (a.s.) from his forefathers (a.s.).

4. . al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 40, h. 1. Tahdhib al-Ahkam, vol. 8, p. 108, h. 365. Both narrating from Talhah ibn Zaid from Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.). Kitab Man la Yahdarhu al-Faqih, vol. 3, p. 475, h. 4663.

5. . Qur’an, 2:233.

6. . Qur’an, 31:14.

7. . al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 40, h. 3. Tahdhib al-Ahkam, vol. 8, p. 106, h. 357. Kitab Man la Yahdarhu al-Faqih, vol. 3, p. 474, h. 4661. All narrating from Sama’ah.

8. . Qurb al-Isnad, p. 93, h. 312, narrating from al-Husayn ibn ‘Alwan from Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) from his father (a.s.). Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 103 p. 323, h. 10.

9. . al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 44, h. 10, narrating from Ghiyath ibn Ibrahim from Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.).

10. . al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 44, h. 12, narrating from Muhammad ibn Marwan. Tahdhib al-Ahkam, vol. 8, p. 110, h. 376, narrating from al-Haytham ibn Muhammad ibn Marwan.

11. . al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 44, h. 13. Tahdhib al-Ahkam, vol. 8, p. 110, h. 377. Kitab Man la Yahdarhu al-Faqih, vol. 3, p. 478, h. 4677. All narrating from Zurarah.

12. . al-Khisal, p. 615, h. 10, narrating from Abu Basir and Muhammad ibn Muslim from Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) from his forefathers (a.s.). Tuhaf al-’Uqul, p. 105. Makarim al-Akhlaq, vol. 1, p. 479, h. 1655. Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 103, p. 323, h. 9.

13. . ‘Uyun Akhbar al-Ridha (a.s.), vol. 2, p. 34, h. 67. Sahifah al-Imam al-Ridha (a.s.), p. 100, h. 41. Both narrating from Ahmad ibn ‘Amir al-Ta’i from Imam al-Ridha (a.s.) from his forefathers (a.s.).

14. . al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 43, h. 8. Tahdhib al-Ahkam, vol. 8, p. 110, h. 375. Kitab Man la Yahdarhu al-Faqih, vol. 3, p. 478, h. 4679. All narrating from Muhammad ibn Qays.

15. . al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 42, h. 1. Tahdhib al-Ahkam, vol. 8, p. 108, h. 367. Da’a’im al-Islam, vol. 2, p. 242, h. 911, narrating from the Prophet (s.a.w.).

16. . al-Amali, by al-Tusi, p. 362, h. 753, narrating from ‘Ali ibn ‘Ali al-Di’bali from Imam al-Ridha (a.s.) from his forefathers (a.s.) from al-Nazal ibn Sirah. Makarim al-Akhlaq, vol. 1, p. 371, h. 1227.

17. . al-Mahasin, vol. 2, p. 360, h. 2254, narrating from ‘Abd al-Rahman ibn al-Hajjaj. Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 66, p. 164, h. 47.

18. . Pulverized wheat or barly mixed with sugar and flavoured with cardamoms.

19. . al-Mahasin, vol. 2, p. 287, h. 1938. Makarim al-Akhlaq, vol. 1, p. 418, h. 1415. Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 66, p. 276, h. 7.

20. . Tahdhib al-Ahkam, vol. 3, p. 274, h. 796. al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 48, h. 4. Both narrating from ‘Abdullah ibn Sinan.

21. . Makarim al-Akhlaq, vol. 1, p. 65, h. 68. Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 16, p. 240.

22. . Musnad Ibn Hanbal, vol. 9, p. 299, h. 24247. Musnad Ishaq ibn Rahwayh, vol. 2, p. 116, h. 587.

Part 9

Education

In Islam, knowledge and teaching is the foundation of upbringing and they are accompanied with discipline and self-improvement. According to religious teachings, the best time for education is the childhood period. Therefore, the most important right of a child is to provide the environment for his education and training. All the rights which were previously mentioned and that discussed here are regarded as the preliminary steps for the child’s education. This chapter presents teachings from the infallibles (a.s.) concerning the education of children.

3.1: The Value of Seeking Knowledge at a Young Age

203. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “Learning at a young age is like engraving on a stone; and the parable of he who learns in his adult age is like one who writes on water.”1

204. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said: “Order your children to seek knowledge.”2

205. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said: “He who asks [questions] while at a young age, will answer [questions] when he is old.”3

206. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said: “He who does not learn in his young age, will not advance in his adult age.”4

207. Sunan al—Darami, narrating from Shurhabil ibn Sa’d who said: “Once Hasan gathered his children and his brother’s children and said: “O my children and my brother’s children! You are the little young people of this generation and there is a hope that you will be the great ones of another generation. Therefore, learn knowledge, and he who cannot learn it by heart should write it down and keep it in his home.”5

208. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said: “Encourage your sons in their childhood to learn etiquette; so that in their grown up age they can be the joy of your eyes. Indeed the parable of the etiquettes you assemble in your early childhood is like engraving something on the stone. These are some treasures the reserves of which grow; and there is no fear on them from instructive events.”6

قِيمَةُ طَلَبِ العِلمِ فِي الصِّغَرِ

203. رسول الله صلى الله عليه وآله: مَثَلُ الَّذي يَتَعلَّمُ في صِغَرِهِ كَالنَّقشِ فِي الحَجَرِ، ومَثَلُ الَّذي يَتَعلَّمُ في كِبَرِهِ كَالَّذي يَكتُبُ عَلَى الماءِ.

204. الإمام عليّ عليه السلام: مُروا أولادَكُم بِطَلَبِ العِلمِ.

205. عنه عليه السلام: مَن سَألَ في صِغَرِهِ أجابَ في كِبَرِهِ.

206. عنه عليه السلام: مَن لَم يَتَعَلَّم فِي الصِّغَرِ لَم يَتَقَدَّم فِي الكِبَرِ.

207. سنن الدارمي عن شرحبيل بن سعد: دَعَا الحَسَنُ عليه السلام بَنيهِ و بَني أخيهِ فَقالَ: يا بَنِيَ و بَنِي أخي، إنَّكُم صِغارُ قَومٍ يوشَكُ أن تَكونوا كِبارَ آخَرينَ، فَتَعَلَّمُوا العِلمَ، فَمَن لَم يَستَطِع مِنكُم أن يَروِيَهُ أو قالَ: يَحفَظَهُ فَليَكتُبهُ، و ليَضَعهُ في بَيتِهِ.

208. الإمام عليّ عليه السلام:

حَرِّض بَنيكَ عَلَى الآدابِ في الصِّغَرِ كَي ما تَقَرَّ بِهِم عَيناكَ فِي الكِبَرِ

و إنَّما مَثَلُ الآدابِ تَجمَعُها في عُنفُوانِ الصِّبا كالنَّقشِ فِي الحَجَرِ

هِيَ الكُنوزُ الّتي تَنمو ذَخائِرُها ولا يُخافُ عَلَيها حادِثُ الغِيَرِ

3.2: The Value of Upbringing

209. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “The right of a child upon his father is that he should choose a good name for him, choose a good wet-nurse for him, and raise him well.”7

210. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “No father has left anything as inheritance for his child better than good manners.”8

211. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “No father has granted a gift to his child better than good manners.”9

212. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “Honour your children and raise them well and you will be forgiven.”10

213. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “Among the rights of a child upon his father is that he should properly upbring his child and does not deny his relation to him.”11

214. Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) said: “The best thing that fathers could leave for their children as inheritance is manners, not wealth, for wealth perishes but manners remain.”12

215. Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) said: “A believing servant [of Allah] will continue to bequeath knowledge and righteous manners as inheritance for his family in order to help them all enter Heaven so that it [Heaven] will not be empty of them, whether young, old, a servant or a neighbour. A disobedient servant [of Allah] will continue to bequeath bad manners for his family which causes them all to enter Hell so that it will not be empty of them, whether young, old a servant or a neighbour.”13

216. Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.): Luqman said: “O my child! If you are disciplined during your childhood, you will enjoy it when you grow old. He who cares about manners pays importance to it, and he who pays importance to it will strive for his knowledge, and he who strives for his knowledge will intense his seeking, and he whose seeking is intense will gain its advantages.”14

قيمَةُ التَّربِيَةِ

209. رسول الله صلى الله عليه وآله: حَقُّ الوَلَدِ عَلى والدِهِ أن يُحسِنَ اسمَهُ، وَ يُحسِنَ مِن مُرضِعِهِ، و يُحسِنَ أدَبَهُ.

210. عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: ما وَرَّثَ والِدٌ وَلَداً خيراً مِن أدَبٍ حَسَنٍ.

211. عنه صلى الله عليه وآله‏ ما نَحَلَ والِدٌ وَلَدا مِن نُحلٍ‏ أفضَلَ مِن أدَبٍ حَسَنٍ.

212. عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: أكرِموا أولادَكُم، وأحسِنوا أدَبَهُم؛ يُغفَر لَكُم.

213. عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: مِن حَقِّ الوَلَدِ عَلى والِدِهِ أن يُحسِنَ أدَبَهُ، و ألّا يَجحَدَ نَسَبَهُ.

214. الإمام الصادق عليه السلام: إنَّ خَيرَ ما وَرَّثَ الآباءُ لِأَبنائِهِم الأَدَبُ لَا المالُ؛ فَإِنَّ المالَ يَذهبُ، و الأَدَبَ يَبقى.

215. عنه عليه السلام: لا يَزالُ العَبدُ المُؤمِنُ يُوَرِّثُ أهلَ بَيتِهِ العِلمَ وَ الأَدَبَ الصّالِحَ، حَتّى‏ يُدخِلَهُمُ الجَنَّةَ جَميعاً، حتّى‏ لا يَفقِدَ مِنهُم صَغيراً و لا كَبيراً و لا خادِماً و لا جاراً، و لا يَزالُ العَبدُ العاصِي يُوَرِّثُ أهلَ بَيتِهِ الأدَبَ السَّيِّئَ حَتّى يُدخِلَهُمُ النّارَ جَميعاً، حَتّى لا يَفقِدَ فيها مِن اهلِ بَيتِهِ صَغيراً و لا كَبيراً و لا خادِماً و لا جاراً.

216. عنه عليه السلام: قالَ لُقمانُ: يا بُنَيّ إن تَأدَّبتَ صَغيرا انتَفَعتَ بِهِ كَبيرا، و مَن عَنا بِالأَدَبِ اهتَمَّ بِهِ، و مَنِ اهتَمَّ بِهِ تَكَلَّفَ عِلمَهُ، و مَن تَكَلَّفَ عِلمَهُ اشتَدَّ لَهُ طَلَبُهُ، ومَنِ اشتَدَّ لَهُ طَلَبُهُ أدرَكَ بِهِ مَنفَعَةً .

3.3: The Responsibility of Education and Upbringing

217. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “Indeed all of you are guardians and all of you are responsible for your subjects. The governor who rules over the people is a guardian and is responsible for his subjects [and will be questioned about them]. A man is the guardian of his family and he is responsible for them. A wife is the guardian for her husband’s house and his children and she is responsible for them. A servant is the guardian for the wealth of his master and he is responsible for them. Therefore, indeed all of you are guardians and all of you are responsible for your subjects.”15

218. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said: “It is the duty of the leader to teach the boundaries of Islam and faith to the people under his command.”16

219. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said: “O people! I have rights over you and you have rights over me. Your right over me is that I give you advice, supply you your dues, teach you so that you may not remain ignorant, and that I discipline you so that you may know.”17

220. Imam al-Sajjad (a.s.) said, describing the rights: “The right of your child is that you know that he belongs to you and he is related to you in this world with his good and his evil. You are responsible for teaching him good manners, leading him towards his Lord and assisting him in obeying Him. Therefore, in regard to his affairs you must act like one who knows that he will be rewarded for being benevolent to him and will be punished for committing wrong to him.”18

221. Imam al-Sajjad (a.s.) said: “The right of your child is that you know that he belongs to you and he is related to you in this world with his good and his evil. You are responsible for teaching him good manners, leading him towards his Lord and assisting him in obeying Him in your rights and his own.

Hence, there will be reward and punishment. Therefore, in regard to his affairs you must act like one who by his good effect in this world decorates his actions, and being forgiving to his Lord for that which is between you and him in that he has tried to do what he must and for you to accept it from him, and there is no power but in Allah.”19

مَسْؤولِيَّةُ التَّعليمِ و التَّربِيَةِ

217. رسول الله صلى الله عليه وآله: ألا كُلُّكُم راعٍ و كُلُّكُم مَسؤولٌ عَن رَعِيَّتِه؛ فَالأَميرُ الَّذي عَلَى النّاسِ راعٍ و هُوَ مَسؤولٌ عَن رَعِيَّتِهِ، وَالرَّجُلُ راعٍ عَلى أَهلِ بَيتِهِ و هُوَ مَسؤولٌ عَنهُم، وَ المرأةُ راعِيةٌ عَلى بَيتِ بَعلِها و وُلدِهِ و هِيَ مَسؤولَةٌ عَنهُم، وَ العَبدُ راعٍ عَلى مالِ سَيِّدِهِ و هُو مَسؤولٌ عَنهُ، ألا فَكُلُّكُم راعٍ و كُلُّكُم مَسؤولٌ عَن رَعِيَّتِهِ.

218. الإمام عليّ عليه السلام: عَلَى الإمامِ أَن يعلِّمَ أهلَ وِلايَتِهِ حُدودَ الإسلامِ وَالإيمانِ.

219. عنه عليه السلام: أيُّهَا النّاسُ! إنَّ لي عَلَيكُم حَقّاً، و لَكُم عَلَيَّ حَقٌّ؛ فَأَمّا حَقُّكُم عَلَيَّ فَالنَّصيحَةُ لَكُم، و تَوفِيرُ فَيئِكُم عَلَيكُم، و تعليمُكُم كَي لا تَجهَلوا، و تأديبُكُم كَيما تَعلَمُوا.

220. الإمام زين العابدين عليه السلام- في بيان الحقوق-: و أمّا حَقُّ وَلَدِكَ فَأن تَعلَمَ أنَّهُ مِنكَ، و مُضافٌ إلَيكَ في عاجِلِ الدُّنيا بِخَيرِهِ وَشَرِّهِ، وأَنَّكَ مَسؤولٌ عَمّا وَليتَهُ مِن حُسنِ الأَدَبِ وَالدِّلالَةِ عَلى رَبِّهِ عزّ وجلّ، وَالمَعونَةِ عَلى طاعَتِهِ، فَاعمَل في أمرِهِ عَمَلَ مَن يَعلَمُ أنَّهُ مُثابٌ عَلَى الإِحسانِ إلَيهِ، مُعاقَبٌ عَلَى الإِساءَةِ إلَيهِ.

221. عنه عليه السلام: وأمّا حَقُّ وَلَدِكَ فَتَعلَمَ أَنَّهُ مِنكَ، ومُضافٌ إِلَيكَ في عاجِلِ الدُّنيا بِخَيرِهِ وشَرِّهِ، وأَنَّكَ مَسؤولٌ عَمّا وَلِيتَهُ مِن حُسنِ الأَدَبِ وَالدِّلالَةِ عَلى رَبِّهِ، وَالمَعونَةِ لَهُ عَلى طاعَتِهِ فيكَ وفي نَفسِهِ، فَمُثابٌ عَلى ذلِكَ ومُعاقَبٌ، فَاعمَلْ فِي أمرِهِ عَمَلَ المُتَزَيِّنِ بِحُسنِ أثَرِهِ عَلَيهِ في عاجِلِ الدُّنيا، المُعذِرِ إلى رَبِّهِ فيما بَينَكَ وبَينَهُ بِحُسنِ القِيامِ عَلَيهِ وَالأَخذِ لَهُ مِنهُ، ولا قُوَّةَ إلّا بِاللهِ.

3.4: The Most Important Obligatory Thing to Teach

A- Islamic Beliefs, Monotheism in Particular
222.  The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “He who upbrings a child in a way that he says: ‘There is no god but Allah’, Allah will not reckon him.”20

223.  The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “When your children begin to speak, teach them: ‘There is no god but Allah’ and then do not care when they will die; and when their milk-teeth start falling, enjoin them to perform prayers.”21

224. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “Let the first phrase spoken by your children be ‘There is no god but Allah’, and at the time of death inculcate to them: ‘There is no god but Allah’, for he whose first word is: ‘There is no god but Allah’, and last word is: ‘There is no god but Allah’ and [even if he] lives for a thousand years, he will not be asked about a single sin [therein].”22

225. al-Kafi, narrating from Sulayman ibn Khalid who said: “I asked Abu ‘Abdullah [al-Sadiq] (a.s.): “I have some family members who follow my words, do I invite them to this affair [in becoming Shi’ah]?”

He (a.s.) said: “Yes. Verily, Allah has said in His Book: “O you who believe! Save yourselves and your families from a Fire whose fuel is men and stones…”23 24

أهَمُّ ما يَجِبُ تَعليمُه‏

العَقائِدُ الإِسلامِيَّةُ ولا سِيَّما التَّوحيدُ

222. رسول الله صلى الله عليه وآله: مَن رَبَّى صَغيرا حَتَّى يَقولَ: «لا إلهَ إلّا اللهُ» لَم يُحاسِبهُ اللهُ عزّ وجلُ.

223. عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: إذا أفصَحَ أولادُكُم فَعَلِّموهُم «لا إلهَ إلّا اللهُ»، ثُمَّ لا تُبالوا مَتى ماتوا، وَإذا اثَّغَروا فَمُروهُم بِالصَّلاةِ.

224. عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: افتَحوا عَلى صِبيانِكُم أوَّلَ كَلِمَةٍ ب «لا إلهَ إلّا اللهُ»، ولَقِّنوهُم عِندَ المَوتِ «لا إلهَ إلّا اللهُ»؛، فَإِنَّهُ مَن كانَ أوَّلُ كَلامِهِ «لا إلهَ إلّا اللهُ» وَآخِرُ كلامِهِ «لا إله إلّا اللهُ» ثُمَّ عاشَ ألفَ سَنَةٍ، ما سُئِلَ عَن ذَنبٍ واحِدٍ.

225. الكافي عن سليمان بن خالد: قُلتُ لِأبي عَبدِ اللهِ عليه السلام: إنَّ لي أهلَ بَيتٍ وهُم يَسمَعونَ مِنِّي، أفَأَدعوهم إلى‏ هذَا الأمرِ؟ فَقالَ: نَعَم، إنَّ اللهَ عزّ وجلّ يَقولُ في كِتابِهِ: (يا أَيُّهَا الَّذِينَ آمَنُوا قُوا أَنْفُسَكُمْ وَ أَهْلِيكُمْ ناراً وَقُودُهَا النَّاسُ وَ الْحِجارَةُ) .

B- Love of the Prophet and his Household
226. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “Train your children to have three features: love for your Prophet, love for his Household, and reciting the Qur’an.”25

حُبُّ النَّبِيّ وأهلِ بَيتِهِ‏

226. رسول الله صلى الله عليه وآله: أدِّبوا أولادَكُم عَلى ثَلاثِ خِصالٍ: حُبِّ نَبِيِّكُم، وحُبِّ أهلِ بَيتِهِ، وعَلى قِراءَةِ القُرآنِ.

C- Obligatory Acts, Especially Prayer and Fasting
“And bid your family to pray and be constant therein. We do not ask you sustenance, (but) We give you sustenance, and the (good) end is for (the people of) righteousness.”26

“And mention Isma’il in the Book, verily he was (ever) true to (his) promise, and he was an apostle, a prophet. And he used to enjoin on his family prayer and almsgiving, and he was well pleased in the sight of his Lord.”27

227. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said: “The Prophet (s.a.w.) was exhausted in his own self after receiving the glad tidings from his Lord that he be entering Heaven. Then Allah revealed the verse: “And bid your family to pray and be constant therein…”28 So he (s.a.w.) ordered his family to perform prayers and he himself was persisting upon it.”29

228. Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) said: “A man came to my father and said: “May Allah bless you! Can I narrate [traditions] to my family?” He said: “Yes. Allah says: “O you who believe! Save yourselves and your families from a Fire whose fuel is men and stones…”30

And he (a.s.) added: “And bid your family to pray and be constant therein…”31 32

229. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said, regarding the saying of Allah the Exalted: “…save yourselves and your family from a Fire…”33: Teach yourselves and your family righteousness.”34

230. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said, regarding the saying of Allah the Exalted: “…save yourselves and your family from a Fire…”35: “It means: Teach them that which will save them from Hellfire.”36

231. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said, when asked when a child should begin to pray: “When he recognizes his right hand from his left hand, enjoin him to pray.”37

232. Jami al-Akhbar: It is narrated that the Prophet of Allah (s.a.w.) once looked at some children and said: “Woe unto the children of the end of the world because of their fathers!” He was asked: “O Messenger of Allah! Is it because of their polytheist fathers?” He said: “No, but it because of their believing fathers who do not teach them any of their obligatory acts, and when their children learn, the parents prevent them, and they will be content with small things they have from this world. I disown myself from them and they are not from me.”38

233. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said: “When a child becomes intellectually mature and is able to recite parts of the Qur’an, he should be taught to prayer.”39

234. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said: “Teach your children to pray, and when they reach puberty make them accountable for it.”40

235. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said: “Teach your children to pray, and when they became eight make them accountable for it.”41

236. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said: “When a child can perceive [things] he is ordered to pray, and to fast if he is capable.”42

237. Imam al-Sajjad (a.s.) said: “Training to fast is when the child is made to fast before reaching the age of puberty, and it is just for the purpose of training, and not an obligatory fasting.”43

238. Imam al-Baqir (a.s.) said: “When our children are five years old, we enjoin them to pray, but you should enjoin them to pray when they are seven. We enjoin our children to fast as much as they can when they are seven, whether it is half of a day or less or more than that. When the thirst or hunger overcomes them, they break their fast so that they become accustomed to fasting and are capable of performing it. So, enjoin your children to fast as much as they can when they are nine years old, and when thirst overcomes them they may break their fast.”44

239. Imam al-Baqir (a.s.) and Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) said: “When a boy becomes three years old, he should be told: “Say: ‘There is no god but Allah’ seven times.” Then he must be left until he becomes three years seven months and twenty days, then he must be told: “Say: ‘Muhammad is the Messenger of Allah’ seven times. Then he is left until he finishes four years, and then he must be told: “Say: ‘Praise of Allah be upon Muhammad and his progeny’ seven times. Then is left until he finishes five years. At that time, he must be asked which one is his right hand and which one is his left. If he can recognize them, his face should be turned towards the direction of the Qiblah and he must be told: “Prostrate.” Then he is left until he finishes seven years, in which he is told: “Wash your face and your hands.” When he washes them he should be told: “Perform your prayers.” Then he is left until he finishes nine years old. At this time, he must be taught how to make ablution and he must be punished for abandoning it, and he must be ordered to pray and punished if he does not. When he learns ablution and prayers, Allah will forgive both him and his parents, by the will of Allah.”45

240. Da’a’im al-Islam: “It was narrated to us from Ja’far ibn Muhammad [al-Sadiq] (a.s.): “He used to enjoin a child to fast during the month of Ramadan for a part of the day, and when he saw that thirst and hunger had overcome him, he would tell him to break his fast.”46

241. Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) said: “When our children reach the age of seven we order them to pray and fast as much as they can tolerate.”47

242. Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) said, in answer to a question about the age when prayer becomes obligatory for a child: “As for prayers, when he is at the age of six, and fasting is when he is able to bear it.”48

243. Tahdhib al-Ahkam, narrating from Mu’awiyah ibn Wahab who said: “I asked Abu ‘Abdullah [al-Sadiq] (a.s.): “In what age will a child be accountable for prayer?” He answered: “When he is between six and seven years old.” I asked: “In what age will he be accountable for fasting?” He answered: “When he is between fourteen and fifteen, and if he observed fasting before this, let him. My son so and so fasted before this age and I let him do so.”49

الفَرائِضُ سِيَّما الصَّلاةُ والصَّومُ‏

(وَ أْمُرْ أَهْلَكَ بِالصَّلاةِ وَ اصْطَبِرْ عَلَيْها لا نَسْئَلُكَ رِزْقاً نَحْنُ نَرْزُقُكَ وَ الْعاقِبَةُ لِلتَّقْوى‏)

(وَ اذْكُرْ فِي الْكِتابِ إِسْماعِيلَ إِنَّهُ كانَ صادِقَ الْوَعْدِ وَ كانَ رَسُولًا نَبِيًّا* وَ كانَ يَأْمُرُ أَهْلَهُ بِالصَّلاةِ وَ الزَّكاةِ وَ كانَ عِنْدَ رَبِّهِ مَرْضِيًّا).

227. الإمام عليّ عليه السلام‏ كانَ رَسولُ اللهِ صلى الله عليه وآله مُنصِباً لِنَفسِهِ بَعدَ البُشرى لَهُ بِالجَنَّةِ مِن رَبِّهِ، فَقالَ عزّ وجلّ: (وَ أْمُرْ أَهْلَكَ بِالصَّلاةِ وَ اصْطَبِرْ عَلَيْها … ) الآية، فَكانَ يَأمُرُ بِها أهلَهُ، و يُصَبِّرُ عَلَيها نَفسَهُ.

228. الإمام الصادق عليه السلام‏ دَخَلَ عَلى أبي عليه السلام رَجُلٌ فَقالَ: رَحِمَكَ اللهُ، احَدِّثُ أهلِي؟ قالَ نَعَم، إنَّ اللهَ يَقولُ: (يا أَيُّهَا الَّذِينَ آمَنُوا قُوا أَنْفُسَكُمْ وَ أَهْلِيكُمْ ناراً وَقُودُهَا النَّاسُ وَ الْحِجارَةُ)، وَقالَ: (وَ أْمُرْ أَهْلَكَ بِالصَّلاةِ وَ اصْطَبِرْ عَلَيْها).

229. الإمام عليّ عليه السلام- في قَولِهِ تَعالى: «قُوا أَنْفُسَكُمْ وَ أَهْلِيكُمْ ناراً»-: عَلِّموا أنفُسَكُم و أهليكُمُ الخَيرَ.

230. عنه عليه السلام- ايضا- مَعناهُ: عَلِّموهُم ما يَنجونَ بِهِ مِنَ النّارِ.

231. رسول الله صلى الله عليه وآله- لَمّا سُئِلَ عَنِ الصَّبِيِ مَتى يُصَلّي؟-: إذا عَرَفَ يَمينَهُ مِن شِمالِهِ فَمُروهُ بِالصَّلاةِ.

232. جامع الأخبار: رُوِيَ عَنِ النَّبِيِ صلى الله عليه وآله أنَّهُ نَظَرَ إلى بَعضِ الأطفالِ فَقالَ: وَيلٌ لِأَولادِ آخِرِ الزَّمانِ مِن آبائِهِم. فَقيلَ: يا رَسولَ اللهِ، مِن آبائِهِمُ المُشرِكينَ؟

فَقالَ: لا، مِن آبائِهِمُ المُؤمِنينَ؛ لا يُعَلِّمونَهُم شَيئا مِنَ الفَرائِضِ، و إذا تَعلَّموا أولادُهُم مَنَعوهُم، و رَضوا عَنهُم بِعَرَضٍ يَسيرٍ مِنَ الدُّنيا، فَأنا مِنهُم بَرِي‏ءٌ، و هُم مِنِّي بُرآءٌ.

233. الإمام عليّ عليه السلام‏ إذا عَقَلَ الغُلامُ و قَرَأ شَيئاً مِنَ القُرآنِ عُلِّمَ الصَّلاةَ.

234. عنه عليه السلام‏ عَلِّموا صِبيانَكُم الصَّلاةَ، و خُذوهُم بِها إذا بَلَغوا الحُلُمَ.

235. عنه عليه السلام‏ عَلِّموا صِبيانَكُم الصَّلاةَ، و خُذوهُم بِها إذا بَلَغوا ثَمانَ سِنينَ.

236. عنه عليه السلام: يُؤمَرُ الصَّبِيُ بِالصَّلاةِ إذا عَقَلَ، و بِالصَّومِ إِذا أطاقَ.

237. الإمام زين العابدين عليه السلام‏ أمَّا صَومُ التَّأديبِ فَأَن يُؤخَذَ الصَّبِيُ إذا رَاهَقَ بِالصَّومِ، تَأديبا و لَيسَ بِفَرضٍ.

238. الإمام الباقر عليه السلام: إنّا نَأمُرُ صِبيانَنا بِالصَّلاةِ إذا كانوا بَني خَمسِ سِنينَ، فَمُروا صِبيانَكُم بِالصَّلاةِ إذا كانوا بَني سَبعِ سِنينَ، و نَحنُ نَأمُرُ صِبيانَنا بِالصَّومِ إذا كانوا بَني سَبعِ سِنينَ بِما أطاقوا مِن صِيامِ اليَومِ إن كانَ إلى نِصفِ النَّهارِ أو أكثَرَ مِن ذلِكَ أو أقَلَّ، فَإِذا غَلَبَهُمُ العَطَشُ و الغَرَثُ‏ أفطَروا، حَتّى يَتَعَوَّدُوا الصَّومَ و يُطيقوهُ، فَمُروا صِبيانَكُم إذا كانوا بَني تِسعِ سِنينَ بِالصَّومِ مَا استَطاعوا مِن صِيامِ اليَومِ، فَإذا غَلَبَهُمُ العَطَشُ أفطَروا.

239. الإمام الباقر و الإمام الصادق عليهما السلام: إذا بَلَغَ‏الغُلامُ ثَلاثَ سِنينَ، يُقالُ لَهُ: قُل لا إلهَ إلّا الله سَبْعَ مَرّاتٍ. ثُمَّ يُترَكُ حَتّى يَتِمَّ لَهُ ثَلاثُ سِنينَ و سَبعَةُ أشهُرٍ و عِشرونَ يَوما، فَيُقالُ لَهُ: قُل: «مُحَمَّدٌ رَسولُ اللهِ» سَبعَ مَرّاتٍ. و يُترَكُ حَتّى يَتِمَّ لَهُ أربَعُ سِنينَ، ثُمَّ يُقالُ لَهُ قُل: سَبعَ مَرّاتٍ: «صَلَّى اللهُ عَلى مُحَمَّدٍ و آلِهِ». ثُمَّ يُترَكُ حَتّى يَتِمَّ لَهُ خَمسُ سِنينَ، ثُمَّ يُقالُ لَهُ: أيُّهُما يَمينُكَ و أيَّهُما شِمالُكَ؟ فَإِذا عَرَفَ ذلِكَ حُوِّلَ وَجهُهُ إلى القِبلَةِ و يُقالُ لَهُ: أسجُد. ثُمَّ يُترَكُ حَتَّى يَتِمَّ لَهُ سَبعُ سِنينَ، فَإِذا تَمَّ لَهُ سَبعُ سِنينَ قيلَ لَهُ: اغسِل وَجهَكَ و كَفّيكَ، فَإِذا غَسَلَهُما قيلَ لَهُ: صَلِّ. ثُمَّ يُترَكُ حَتّى يَتِمَّ لَهُ تِسعُ سِنينَ، فَإِذا تَمَّت لَهُ عُلِّمَ الوُضوءَ، و ضُرِبَ عَلَيهِ، و امِرَ بِالصَّلاةِ، و ضُرِبَ عَلَيها. فَإِذا تَعَلَّمَ الوُضوءَ وَالصَّلاةَ غَفَرَ اللهُ عزّ وجلّ لَهُ و لِوَالِدَيهِ إن شاءَ اللهُ.

240. دعائم الإسلام: رُوّينا عَن جَعفَر بنِ مُحَمَّدٍ عليه السلام: أنَّهُ كانَ يَأمُرُ الصَّبِيَ بِالصَّومِ في شَهرِ رَمَضانَ بَعضَ النَّهارِ، فَإِذا رَأَى الجُوعَ و العَطَشَ غَلَبَ عَلَيهِ، أمَرَهُ فَأَفطَرَ.

241. الإمام الصادق عليه السلام: إنَّا نَأمُرُ صِبيانَنا بِالصَّلاةِ وَ الصِّيامِ ما أطاقوا، إذا كانوا أبناءَ سَبعِ سِنينَ.

242. عنه عليه السلام- لَمّا سُئِلَ: مَتى تَجِبُ الصَّلاةُ عَلَى الصَّبِيِ‏ ؟-: إذا كانَ ابنَ سِتِّ سِنينَ، وَالصِّيامُ إذا أطاقَهُ.

243. تهذيب الأحكام عن معاوية بن وهب: سَأَلتُ أبا عَبدِ اللهِ عليه السلام: في كَم‏يُؤخَذُ الصَّبِيّ بِالصَّلاةِ؟

فَقالَ: فيما بَينَ سَبعِ سِنينَ و سِتِّ سِنينَ.

قُلْتُ: في كَم يُؤخَذُ بِالصِّيامِ؟

فَقالَ: فيما بَينَ خَمسَ عَشرَةَ أو أربَعَ عَشرَةَ، وإن صامَ قَبلَ ذلِكَ فَدَعهُ، فَقَد صامَ ابني فُلانٌ قَبلَ ذلِكَ و تَرَكتُهُ.

D- The Qur’an

244. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “He who recites the Qur’an before puberty has indeed been given wisdom in his childhood.”50

245. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “The best among you is he who learns the Qur’an and teaches it.”51

246. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “There is no man who teaches his child the Qur’an without that child’s parents being crowned on Judgment Day with a crown of sovereignty and they will be clothed with two sets of clothing no people have seen the likes of.”52

247. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “The Chapter of al-Waqi’ah [Qur’an: 56] is the chapter of needlessness, so read it and teach it to your children.”53

248. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “If any among you want to speak with his Lord, he should recite the Qur’an.”54

249. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “He who Allah has granted in memorising His Book and thinks that another person has been given something better has indeed belittled the greatest bounty.”55

250. Sharh Nahj al-Balaghah: “Ghalib ibn Sa’sa’ah once went to [Imam] ‘Ali (a.s.) along with his son Farazdaq and ‘Ali (a.s.) had asked him: “Who are you?” He answered: “Ghalib ibn Sa’sa’ah al-Mujashi’i… .” He (a.s.) said: “O Abu al-Akhtal! Who is this lad with you?” He answered: “My son. He is a poet.” He (a.s.) said: “Teach him the Qur’an, as it is better for him than poetry.”56

251. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said: “The son’s right upon the father is that he should choose a good name for him, discipline him well and teach him the Qur’an.”57

252. Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) said: “The memoriser of the Qur’an who practises according to it will be with the angelic envoys (al-safarah) 58 who are the righteous angels [of Allah].”59

القُرآنُ‏

244. رسول الله صلى الله عليه وآله: مَن قَرَأَ القُرآنَ قَبلَ أن يَحتَلِمَ فَقَد اوتِي الحُكمَ صَبِيّا.

245. عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: خِيارُكُم مَن تَعَلَّمَ القُرآنَ وعَلَّمَهُ.

246. عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: ما مِن رَجُلٍ عَلَّمَ وَلَدَهُ القُرآنَ إلّا تُوِّجَ أبَواهُ يَومَ القِيامَةِ بِتاجِ المُلكِ، وكُسِيَ حُلَّتَينِ لَم يَرَ النّاسُ مِثلَهُما.

247. عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: سورَةُ الواقِعَةِ سورَةُ الغِنى، فَاقرَؤوها، و عَلِّموها أولادَكُم.

248. عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: إذا أحَبَّ أحَدُكُم أن يُحَدِّثَ رَبَّهُ فَليَقرَأِ القُرآنَ.

249. عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: مَن أعطاهُ اللهُ حِفظَ كِتابِهِ لَو ظَنَّ، أنَّ أحَداً اوتِيَ أفضَلَ مِمّا اوتِىَ فَقَد غَمَطَ أعظَمَ النِّعَمِ.

250. شرح نهج البلاغة لابن أبي الحديد: وَفَدَ غالِبُ بنُ صَعصَعَةَ عَلى‏ عَلِيٍّ عليه السلام و مَعهُ ابنُهُ الفَرَزدَقُ‏ ، فَقالَ لَهُ: مَن أنتَ؟ فَقالَ: غالِبُ بنُ صَعصَعَةَ المُجاشِعِيُّ … .

قالَ: يا أبَا الأَخطَلِ، مَن هذَا الغُلامُ مَعَكَ؟ قالَ: ابني، و هُوَ شَاعِرٌ. قالَ: عَلِّمهُ القُرآنَ؛ فَهُوَ خَيرٌ لَهُ مِنَ الشِّعرِ.

251. الإمام عليّ عليه السلام: حَقُّ الوَلَدِ عَلَى الوالِدِ أن يُحسِنَ اسمَهُ، و يُحسِنَ أدَبَهُ، و يُعَلِّمَهُ القُرآنَ.

252. الإمام الصادق عليه السلام: الحافِظُ لِلقُرآنِ العامِلُ بِهِ مَعَ السَّفَرَةِ الكِرامِ البَرَرَةِ.

E- Religious Sciences
253. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said: “Teach your children things that Allah will benefit them with, and the Murji’ites 60 should not dominate their thoughts.”61

254. Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) said: “Hasten to make your youth acquainted with traditions before that Murji’ites do.”62

المَعارِفُ الدّينِيَّةُ

253. الإمام عليّ عليه السلام: عَلِّموا صِبيانَكُم ما يَنفَعُهُمُ اللهُ بِهِ، لا تَغلِب عَلَيهِمُ المُرجِئَةُ بِرَأيِها.

254. الإمام الصادق عليه السلام: بادِروا أحداثَكُم بِالحَديثِ قَبلَ أن تَسبِقَكُم إلَيهِمُ المُرجِئَةُ .

F- Writing

255. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “The right of a child upon the father is that the father should teach him how to write, swim and cast [an arrow – archery]. He should also bequeath the child with lawful wealth [as inheritance].”63

الكتابة

255. رسول الله صلى الله عليه وآله: حَقُّ الوَلَدِ عَلَى الوالِدِ أن يُعَلِّمَهُ الكِتابَةَ وَ السِّباحَةَ وَالرَّميَ، و أن يُوَرِّثَهُ طيِّباً.

G- Hygiene

256. The Prophet of Allah (s.a.w.) said: “For everything there is a strategy, and the strategy for having good health lies in four things: scantiness in talking, sleeping, walking and eating.”64

257. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “The mother of all medicines is eating less.”65

258. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “The stomach is the house of all ailments, and abstinence [having a diet] is the source of all remedies.”66

259. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said, when he was asked and someone said: All sciences are in the Qur’an except medicine?: “Be aware! There is a verse in the Qur’an which contains the whole science of medicine. It says: ‘…and eat and drink but be not prodigal.”67 68

260. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said, from the wise sayings attributed to him: “Do not live to eat, but eat to live.”69

261. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said, from the wise sayings attributed to him: “A wise person should remember the bitterness of medicine when tasting the sweetness of food.”70

262. al-Khisal: “The Commander of the faithful ‘Ali ibn Abu Talib (a.s.) said to his son Hasan (a.s.): “O my son! Let me teach you four things that with them you will have no need for medicine.”

He (a.s.) said: “Yes, O Commander of the faithful!”

The Imam said: “Do not begin eating unless you are hungry, do not leave it unless you are still willing to eat from it, chew [the food] well, and go to the toilet before going to bed. If you apply these four points you will not need medicine.”71

263. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said: “Eating less will hinder many sicknesses of the body.”72

264. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said: “He who plants in himself the love of different varieties of food will reap the fruits of different diseases.”73

265. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said: “Many a time has one eating hindered many eatings.”74

المَسائِلُ الصِّحِّيّةُ

256. رسول الله صلى الله عليه وآله: لِكُلِّ شَي‏ءٍ حيلَةٌ، وحيلَةُ الصِّحَّةِ فِي الدُّنيا أربَعُ خِصالٍ: قِلَّةُ الكَلامِ، و قِلَّةُ المَنامِ، و قِلَّةُ المَشيِ، و قِلَّةُ الطَّعامِ.

257. عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: امُّ جَميعِ الأَدوِيَةِ قِلَّةُ الأَكلِ.

258. عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: المَعِدَةُ بَيتُ كُلِّ داءٍ، وَالحِميَةُ رأسُ كُلِّ دَواءٍ.

259. الإمام عليّ عليه السلام- لَمّا سُئِلَ فَقيلَ: إنَّ فِي القُرآنِ كُلَّ عِلمٍ إلَّا الطِّبَّ؟- أما إنَّ فِي القُرآنِ لَآيَةً تَجمَعُ الطِّبَّ كُلَّهُ: (وَ كُلُوا وَ اشْرَبُوا وَ لا تُسْرِفُوا) .

260. الإمام عليّ عليه السلام- فِي الحِكَمِ المَنسوبَةِ إلَيهِ- لا تَطلُبِ الحَياةَ لِتَأكُلَ، بَلِ اطلُبِ الأَكلَ لِتَحيا.

261. عنه عليه السلام- أيضا- يَنبَغي لِلعاقِلِ أن يَتَذَكَّرَ عِندَ حَلاوَةِ الغِذاءِ مَرارَةَ الدَّواءِ.

262. الخصال: قالَ أميرُ المُؤمِنينَ عَلِيُّ بنُ أبي طالِبٍ عليه السلام لِلحَسَنِ ابنِهِ عليه السلام: يا بُنَيَّ، ألا اعَلِّمُكَ أربَعَ خِصالٍ تَستَغني بِها عَنِ الطِّبِّ؟

فَقالَ: بَلى‏، يا أميرَالمُؤمِنينَ.

قالَ: لا تَجلِس عَلَى الطَّعامِ إلّا و أنتَ جائِعٌ، ولا تَقُم عَنِ الطَّعامِ إلّا و أنتَ تَشتَهيهِ، و جَوِّدِ المَضغَ، و إذا نِمتَ فَاعرِض نَفسَكَ عَلَى الخَلاءِ . فَإِذَا استَعمَلتَ هذَا استَغنَيتَ عَنِ الطِّبِّ.

263. الإمام عليّ عليه السلام: قِلَّةُ الأَكلِ يَمنَعُ كَثيراً مِن أعلالِ الجِسمِ.

264. عنه عليه السلام: مَن غَرَسَ في نَفسِهِ مَحَبَّةَ أنواعِ الطَّعامِ، اجتَنى‏ ثِمارَ فُنونِ الأَسقامِ.

265. عنه عليه السلام: كَم مِن أكلَةٍ مَنَعَت أكَلاتٍ.

H- Moral Wisdoms
266. Ma’ani al-Akhbar, narrating from Shurayh ibn Hani who said: “The Commander of the faithful (a.s.) asked his son Hasan ibn ‘Ali: “My son! What is wisdom?” He answered: “Preserving that which you have entrusted to your heart.” He asked again: “What is prudence?” His son answered: “That you wait for the opportunity to come and hasten [to it] when you can.” He [Imam ‘Ali] (a.s.) asked: “What is magnitude?” He answered: “Tolerating the losses and adopting generosities.” He asked: “What is generosity?” He answered: “Responding to one who asks and the donating of he who has gained.” He asked: “What is stinginess?” He answered: “Considering a little thing given as prodigality and what has been spent in charity as wasted.” He asked: “What is mildness?” He answered: “Demanding little and abandoning what is worthless.” He asked: “What is formality?” He answered: “Relying on someone who does not secure you, and pinning hopes on what does not have benefit for you.” He asked: “What is ignorance?” He answered: “It is to hasten for the opportunities before their time and to refrain from answering. The best helper in many occasions is silence, even if you are an eloquent speaker.” Then Imam ‘Ali –praises of Allah be upon him- turned to his son Husayn and asked him: “O my son! What is mastership?”

He answered: “Compatibility with one’s family and tolerating problems.”

He asked: “What is needlessness?” He answered: “Having modest hopes and being content with what is enough for you.”

‘Ali (a.s.) asked: “What is neediness?” He answered: “Greediness and extreme despair.”

He (a.s.) asked: “What is being mean?” He answered: “It is selfishness and giving up the chastity [of the family].” The Imam (a.s.) asked: “What is foolishness?” He answered: “Your enmity against your commander and to those who can harm you or benefit you.”

Then the Imam (a.s.) turned his face to Harith al-Ahwal and said: “O Harith! Teach these wisdoms to your children, for they increase providence, farsightedness and wisdom.”75

267. Tuhaf al-’Uqul, narrating from Sufyan al-Thawri who said: “I went to al-Sadiq (a.s.) and asked him to advise me. He (a.s.) said: “O Sufyan! My father disciplined me with three good manners and forbade me from three things. As for the good manners, he told me: “O my son! He who accompanies an evil person will not remain safe, he who does not control his speech will regret and he who goes to bad places will be accused.” I [Sufyan] said: “O the son of the daughter of the Messenger of Allah! And what were the three things that he prohibited you from?” He said: “He forbade me from companionship with an envier of bounties, a gloater over the misfortunes of others and a talebearer.”76

الحِكَمُ الأَخلاقِيَّةُ

266. معاني الأخبار عن شريح بن هانئ: سَأَلَ أميرُ المُؤمِنينَ عليه السلام ابنَهُ الحَسَنَ بنَ عَليّ، فَقالَ:

يا بُنَيَ مَا العَقلُ؟ قالَ: حِفظُ قَلبِكَ مَا استُودِعتَهُ.

قالَ: فَمَا الحَزمُ؟ قالَ: أن تَنتَظِرَ فُرصَتَكَ، وتُعاجِلَ ما أمكَنَكَ.

قالَ: فَمَا المَجدُ؟ قالَ: حَملُ المَغارِمِ، وَابتِناءُ المَكارِمِ.

قالَ: فَمَا السَّماحَةُ؟ قالَ: إجابَةُ السّائِلِ، و بَذلُ النّائِلِ.

قالَ: فَمَا الشُّحُّ؟ قالَ: أن تَرَى القَلِيلَ سَرَفاً، و مَا أنفَقتَ تَلَفاً.

قالَ: فَمَا الرِّقَّةُ؟ قالَ: طَلَبُ اليَسيرِ، و مَنعُ الحَقيرِ.

قالَ: فَمَا الكُلفَةُ؟ قالَ: التَّمَسُّكُ بِمَن لا يُؤَمِّنُكَ، و النَّظَرُ فيما لا يَعنيكَ.

قالَ: فَمَا الجَهلُ؟ قالَ: سُرعَةُ الوُثوبِ عَلَى الفُرصَةِ قَبل الاستِمكانِ مِنها، و الامتِناعُ عَنِ الجَوابِ. و نِعمَ العَونُ الصَّمتُ فِي مَواطِنَ كَثيرَةٍ و إن كُنتَ فَصيحاً.

ثُمَّ أقبَلَ صَلَواتُ اللهِ عَلَيهِ عَلَى الحُسَينِ ابنِهِ عليه السلام فَقالَ لَهُ:

يا بُنَيّ ما السُّؤدَدُ؟ قالَ: اصطِناعُ العَشيرَةِ، وَ احتِمالُ الجَريرَةِ.

قالَ: فَمَا الغِنى؟ قالَ: قِلَّةُ أمانِيكَ، وَ الرِّضى بِما يَكفيكَ.

قالَ: فَمَا الفَقرُ؟ قالَ: الطَّمَعُ، و شِدَّةُ القُنوطِ.

قالَ: فَمَا اللُّؤمُ؟ قالَ: إحرازُ المَرءِ نَفسَهُ، وَإسلامُهُ عِرسَهُ.

قالَ: فَمَا الخُرقُ؟ قالَ: مُعاداتُكَ أميرَكَ و مَن يَقدِرُ عَلى‏ ضَرِّكَ و نَفعِكَ.

ثُمَّ التَفَتَ إلَى الحارِثِ الأعوَرِ فَقالَ: يا حارِثُ، عَلِّموا هذِهِ الحِكَمَ أولادَكُم؛ فَإنَّها زِيادَةٌ فِي العَقلِ وَ الحَزمِ وَالرَّأيِ.

267. تحف العقول عن سفيان الثوري: دَخَلتُ عَلَى الصّادِقِ عليه السلام فَقُلتُ لَهُ: أوصِني … .

فَقالَ عليه السلام: يا سُفيانُ، أدَّبَني أبي عليه السلام بِثَلاثٍ، و نَهاني عَن ثَلاثٍ؛ فَأمَّا اللَّواتي أدَّبَني بِهِنَّ فَإنَّهُ قالَ لي: يا بُنَيَ، مَن يَصحَب صاحِبَ السَّوءِ لا يَسلَمُ، و مَن لا يُقيِّد ألفاظَهُ يَندَم، و مَن يَدخُل مَداخِلَ السّوءِ يُتَّهَم.

قُلتُ: يَا ابنَ بِنتِ رَسولِ اللهِ، فَمَا الثَّلاثُ اللَّواتِي نَهاكَ عَنهُنَّ؟ قالَ عليه السلام: نَهاني أن اصاحِبَ حاسِدَ نِعمَةٍ، و شامِتاً بِمُصيبَةٍ، أو حامِلَ نَميمَةٍ.

I - Useful Poems
268. Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) said: “The Commander of the faithful [‘Ali] (a.s.) liked having the poetry of Abu Talib being recited to him, saying: “Learn it [by heart] and teach it to your children, for he was the follower of the religion of Allah and there is abundant knowledge in it.”77

269. Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) said: “O nation of Shi’ah! Teach your children the poems of al-’Abdi,78 for he was a follower of the religion of Allah.”79

الأشعارُ النّافِعَةُ

268. الإمام الصادق عليه السلام: كانَ أميرُ المُؤمِنينَ عليه السلام يُعجِبُهُ أن يُروى‏ شِعرُ أبي طالِبٍ، و أن يُدَوَّنَ، و قالَ: تَعَلَّموهُ و عَلِّموهُ أولادَكُم، فَإِنَّهُ كانَ عَلى دينِ اللهِ، و فيهِ عِلمٌ كَثيرٌ.

269. عنه عليه السلام: يا مَعشَرَ الشّيعَةِ عَلِّموا أولادَكُم شِعرَ العَبدِيّ‏ ، فَإِنَّهُ عَلى دينِ اللهِ.

The Function of Poetry in a Child’s Education and Upbringing
The emphasis of Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) on teaching his father Abu Talib’s poetry to children and Imam al-Sadiq’s (a.s.) recommendation to teach children al-’Abdi’s poetry is an indication that the Ahlul Bayt viewpoint is that poetry has an important role and fundamental function, not only in the realm of culture and literature, but also in education and upbringing, and for the training of the young generation in particular. Based on this guidance, it is a duty for the religious and devoted writers and poets to allocate a special chapter in their poetry books for children’s poetry.

Without doubt, it is a great and difficult task to compose poems for children, especially if they are instructive and useful which can deliver lofty doctrinal, moral and social concepts skilfully and in a simple, eloquent and attractive form appropriate to the mind of children, which is not possible for every poet to accomplish.

An important point that has been referred to in both the above mentioned traditions is that in an instructive poem, in addition to being acceptable from an artistic point of view, it is necessary that in order for the new generation to enjoy the utmost training benefit from it, the poet himself enjoys religious commitment, as it has been emphasized in the recommendations of teaching the poetry of Abu Talib and al-’Abdi to children and the emphasis of their own commitment.

Secondly, the poem must contain information that children need in doctrinal, moral, and practical fields. The emphasis of Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) on teaching Abu Talib’s poetry is because, besides the religious commitment of the poet, it also contains a lot of knowledge.

Thirdly, because of the constructive role of the child’s acquaintance and familiarity with Ahlul Bayt (a.s.), the poems which are composed for them must address the loving and knowing of them. The insistence of Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) on teaching al-’Abdi’s poetry to children is because his poetry is full of knowledge related to the household of the Prophet (s.a.w.). The following are some lines of his long and beautiful elegy, translated from Arabic to English given as an example:80

Is your love ailment and sickness cured?

By means of asking the address of the ruined house [of your sweat beloved]?

Or is shedding tears caused by being far from the beloved;

Cools down the heat of the day of separation?

O rider, the steps of whose mount are firm!

And paves the old plain, trotting and swiftly.

Give my regards to that grave which is in Najaf.

And in it is he who is the best among Arabs and non-Arabs.

Make your motto humbleness before Allah, and call;

The best successor and the nearest in likeness to the best Prophet, and say:

On the day of Ghadir Khum he had kept them apart from this situation,

When Ahmad, the guide, climbed up the saddles of camels,

And told the people who were near around him,

Those who had resided in front of him, to the audience and those who were the hearers of his words:

O’ ‘Ali! Get up since I have been ordered to;

Convey a message to people and I am worthy of conveying a message,

You are the only spouse of the Prophet’s daughter, al-Zahra (a.s.),

Whom you protect and you are the father of her noble children,

The children, who strive in the path of Allah,

And are the arms of each other for the cause of Allah,

And believe in Him and work for Him.

They lead toward development and perfection that when the darkness of aberration befalls,

They brightly guide better than any shooting star.

May the greeting of the Lord of the Throne in all times;

Be upon the son of Fatimah, he who repels sorrows!

On his [‘Ali’s] two sons, one of whom was killed by a fatal poison,

And the other was buried with a dusty [bloody] face.

After him was the pious one who was mostly in prostration;

Then is the cleaver of science who approached the peak of research.

Next to him are Ja’far and his son Musa.

Then al-Ridha, the righteous, and al-Jawad, the worshipper.

Finally, the two ‘Askaris, and al-Mahdi, who is their Qasim.

And the owner of affair who has worn the garment of guidance.

The one who fills the earth with justice after it is filled with cruelty.

And eradicates the people of aberration and wrong action.

O possessor of the Pond of Kawthar full of limpid water!

Who hinders the enemies from its wholesome water!

By expressing some thoughts and sayings of mine,

Seeking you, I knocked out some of your enemies.

So much so that my opinions, by means of the sword of poetry and lecture.

Put the brand of disgrace on their foreheads.

I resorted to your love and piety as company

They were the best among all the companions I had

Then, provide with the mind of al-’Abdi a good elegy

That if an elegy violates Your limit, it will not be fair.

Inside me there is a modesty and guidance inclined toward You which is adored by virtue and courtesy.

I put my soul in trouble for Your sake,

With the knowledge that my tranquillity is in such a trouble.

J- Swimming and Archery
270. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “Teach your children swimming and archery.”81

271. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “Teach swimming and archery to your sons and teach women to spindle.”82

272. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “Teach archery to your sons, for it will bring victory over the enemy.”83 84

السِّباحَةُ وَالرِّمايَةُ

270. رسول الله صلى الله عليه وآله: عَلِّموا أولادَكُمُ السِّباحَةَ وَالرِّمايَةَ.

271. عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: عَلِّموا أبناءَكُمُ السِّباحَةَ وَالرَّميَ، وَالمَرأةَ المِغزَلَ‏ .

272. عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: عَلِّموا بَنيكُم الرَّميَ؛ فَإنَّهُ نِكايَةُ العَدُوِّ.

3.5: The Age of Upbringing and Disciplining a Child

3.5: The Age of Upbringing and Disciplining a Child 85

273. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “A child is a master for seven years, a servant for seven years, and a minister for seven years. If you are content with his upbringing when he is twenty one years old, that is good, and if not, then let him be, for you are excused with Allah.”86

274. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said: “A child is to be trained for seven years, to be disciplined for seven years and is employed for seven years. The end of his physical growth is when he is twenty three years old, and the end of the completion of his intellect is when he is thirty five years old, and after that, whatever comes forth is gained by means of experience.”87

275. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said: “Your child is your bundle of flowers for seven years, your servant for seven years, and then he will be either your enemy or your friend.”88

276. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said, in his advice to his son Hasan: “I hastened with my will for you and wrote its salient points lest death overtakes me before I divulged unto you what I have in my heart, or lest my wit be affected as my body has been affected, or the forces of passions or the evils of the world overtake you in making you like a stubborn camel. Indeed, the heart of a young man is like an uncultivated land as it accepts whatever is strewn on it. So, I hastened to train you properly before your heart hardens up and your mind becomes occupied…

Since I feel for your affairs as a compassionate father should feel, and I aim at teaching and disciplining you, I thought it should be at a time when you are advancing in age and new on the stage of this world, possessing upright intention and a clean heart. Therefore, I should begin with the teaching of the book of Allah the Exalted and its interpretation, along with the laws of Islam and its commands with its lawful and unlawful matters.”89

277. Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) said: “Leave your son alone until he becomes six years old, then have him accompany you and discipline him with your own discipline. If he accepts it and improves, that is good, otherwise let him be.”90

278. Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) said: “A boy must be left to play for seven years, taught the Qur’an for seven years and must learn lawful and unlawful for seven years.”91

وَقتُ تَربِيَةِ الطِّفلِ وتأديبه‏

273. رسول الله صلى الله عليه وآله: الوَلَدُ سَيِّدٌ سَبعَ سِنينَ، وعَبدٌ سَبعَ سِنينَ، ووَزيرٌ سَبعَ سِنينَ، فَإِن رَضيتَ مُكانَفَتَهُ لِإِحدى‏ وعِشرينَ وإلّا فَاضرِب عَلى جَنبِهِ؛ فَقَدِ اعتَذَرتَ الَى اللهِ عزّوجلّ.

274. الإمام عليّ عليه السلام: يُرَبَّى الصَّبِيّ سَبعاً، ويُؤَدَّبُ سَبعاً، ويُستَخدَمُ سَبعاً، ومُنتَهى طولِهِ في ثَلاثٍ وعِشرينَ سَنَةً، وعَقلِهِ في خَمسٍ وثَلاثينَ سَنَةً، وما كانَ بَعدَ ذلِكَ فَبِالتَّجارِبِ.

275. عنه عليه السلام: وَلَدُكَ رَيحانَتُكَ سَبعاً، وَخادِمُكَ سَبعاً، ثُمَّ هُوَ عَدُوُّكَ أو صَديقُكَ.

276. عنه عليه السلام- مِن وَصِيَّتِهِ لِوَلَدِهِ الحَسَنِ عليه السلام- بادَرتُ بِوَصِيَّتي إلَيكَ، وأورَدتُ خِصالًا مِنها قَبلَ أن يَعجَلَ بي أجَلي دونَ أن افضِيَ إلَيكَ بِما في نَفسي، أو أن انقَصَ في رَأيي كَما نُقِصتُ في جِسمِي، أو يَسبِقَني إلَيكَ بَعضُ غَلَباتِ الهَوى وفِتَنِ الدُّنيا، فَتَكُونَ كَالصَّعبِ‏ النَّفورِ، وإنَّما قَلبُ الحَدَثِ كَالأرضِ الخالِيَةِ؛ ما القِيَ فيها مِن شَي‏ءٍ قَبِلَتهُ، فَبادَرتُكَ بِالأَدَبِ قَبلَ أن يَقسُوَ قَلبُكَ، ويَشتَغِلَ لُبُّكَ … ورَأيتُ حَيثُ عَناني مِن أمرِكَ ما يَعنِي الوالِدُ الشَّفيقُ، وأجمَعتُ عَلَيهِ مِن أدَبِكَ أن يَكونَ ذلِكَ وأنتَ مُقبِلُ العُمُرِ ومُقتَبَلُ الدَّهرِ، ذو نِيَّةٍ سَليمَةٍ، ونَفسٍ صافِيَةٍ، وأن أبتَدِئَكَ بِتَعليمِ كِتابِ اللهِ عزّ وجلّ وتَأويلِهِ، وشَرائِعِ الإِسلامِ وأحكامِهِ، وحَلالِهِ وحَرامِهِ.

277. الإمام الصادق عليه السلام: أمهِل صَبِيَّكَ حَتّى يَأتِيَ لَهُ سِتُّ سِنينَ، ثُمَّ ضُمَّهُ إلَيكَ سَبعَ سِنينَ فَأدِّبهُ بِأدَبِكَ، فَإِن قَبِلَ وصَلَحَ وإلّا فَخَلِّ عَنهُ.

278. عنه عليه السلام: الغُلامُ يَلعَبُ سَبعَ سِنينَ، ويَتَعَلَّمُ الكِتابَ سَبعَ سِنينَ، ويَتَعَلَّمُ الحَلالَ وَالحَرامَ سَبعَ سِنينَ.

3.6: The Method of Islamic Upbringing

A- Honouring, Gentleness, Sympathy and Love
279.  The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “Honour your children and teach them good manners.”92

280. Musnad Ibn Hanbal, narrating from the uncle of Abu Rafay’ ibn ‘Amr al-Ghaffari who said: “I was a child when I threw pelting stones at a date tree that belonged to the Ansar, and when the Prophet (s.a.w.) came, he was told: “Here is the place where a boy threw stones at our date tree.” I was taken to the Prophet (s.a.w.) and he told me. “O boy! Why do you throw stone at that date tree?” I answered: “I eat [from it].” He said: “Then do not throw stones at the tree, and eat whatever has fallen under it.” Then he (s.a.w.) touched my head kindly and said: “O Allah! Satiate his stomach!”93

281. al-Mu’jam al-Kabir, narrating from Asad ibn Wida’ah who said: “A man named Juz’ came to the Prophet (s.a.w.) and said: “O Messenger of Allah! My family makes me angry. How should I punish them?”

He said: “Forgive them!”

The man asked him the question again and repeated it three times. Then the Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “If you should punish, then punish what is appropriate to the wrong act, and beware of [striking] the face.”94

282.  Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said: “Be like a friendly physician who applies medicine where it is useful.”95

283.  Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said: “Rebuke the evil-doer by rewarding the good-doer.”96

284.  Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said: “The punishment of the wise is [done] implicitly, while the punishment of the ignorant is [done] explicitly.”97

285.  Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said: The implicit remark to a wise person’s mistake is among the most painful of blaming for him.”98

286. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said: “To speak allusively for a wise person is the worst scorn for him.”99

287. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said: “Many a sin equals the punishment just by informing the wrong-doer.”100

288. Imam al-Sajjad (a.s.) said: “A child’s right is to be kind when educating him, forgiving him, covering his mistakes, acting moderately towards him and helping him. And the right of people of your faith is that … you consider the elderly [men] amongst them as your father, their young ones as your brothers, the elderly [women] amongst them as your mother and their infants as your children.”101

المَنهَجُ التَّربَوِيُّ الإِسلامِيُ‏

التَّكريمُ وَالرِّفقُ وَالرَّحمَةُ وَالمَحَبَّةُ

279. رسول الله صلى الله عليه وآله: أَكرِموا أولادَكُم، وأحسِنوا أدَبَهُم.

280. مسند ابن حنبل عن عمّ أبي رافع بن عمرو الغفاري: كُنتُ وأنا غُلامٌ أرمي نَخلًا لِلأَنصارِ، فَأتَى النَّبيّ صلى الله عليه وآله فَقيلَ: إنَّ هاهُنا غُلاما يَرمي نَخلَنا! فَاتِيَ بي إلَى النَّبِيّ صلى الله عليه وآله، فَقالَ: يا غُلامُ! لِمَ تَرمِي النَّخلَ؟ قالَ: قُلتُ: آكُلُ. قالَ: فَلا تَرمِ النَّخلَ وكُل ما يَسقُطُ في أسافِلِها. ثُمَّ مَسَحَ رَأسي وقالَ: اللّهُمَّ أشبِع بَطنَهُ.

281. المعجم الكبير عن أسد بن وداعة: أنَّ رَجُلًا يُقالُ لهُ: «جُزءٌ» أتَى النَّبِيّ صلى الله عليه وآله فَقالَ: يا رَسولَ اللهِ، إنَّ أهلي يُغضِبونّي فَبِمَ اعاقِبُهُم؟ فَقالَ: تَعفو، ثُمَّ قالَ الثّانِيَة، حَتّى قالَها ثَلاثاً، قالَ: فَإِن عاقَبتَ فَعاقِب بِقَدرِ الذَّنبِ، وَاتَّقِ الوَجهَ.

282. الإمام عليّ عليه السلام: كُن كَالطَّبيبِ الرَّفيقِ الَّذي يَضَعُ الدَّواءَ بِحَيثُ يَنفَعُ.

283. عنه عليه السلام: ازجُرِ المُسي‏ءَ بِثَوابِ المُحسِنِ.

284. عنه عليه السلام: عُقوبَةُ العُقلاءِ التَّلويحُ، عُقوبَةُ الجُهَلاءِ التَّصريحُ.

285. عنه عليه السلام: تَلويحُ زَلَّةِ العاقِلِ لَهُ مِن أمَضِ‏ عِتابِهِ.

286. عنه عليه السلام: التَّعريضُ‏ لِلعاقِلِ أشَدُّ عِتابِهِ.

287. عنه عليه السلام: رُبَّ ذَنبٍ مِقدارُ العُقوبَةِ عَلَيهِ إعلامُ المُذنِبِ بِهِ.

288. الإمام زين العابدين عليه السلام: حَقُّ الصَّغيرِ رَحمَتُهُ في تَعليمِهِ، وَالعَفوُ عَنهُ وَالسِّترُ عَلَيهِ، وَالرِّفقُ بِهِ، وَالمَعونَةُ لَهُ … وحَقُّ أهلِ مِلَّتِكَ … أن يَكونَ شُيوخُهُم بِمَنزِلَةِ أبيكَ، وشُبّانُهُم، بِمَنزِلَةِ إخوَتِكَ، وعَجائِزُهُم بِمَنزِلَةِ امِّكَ، وَالصِّغارُ بِمَنزِلَةِ أولادِكَ.

B- Strictness and Uncompromising
“O you who believe? Save yourselves and your families from a Fire whose fuel is men and stones, over which are (appointed) angels stern (and) severe who flinch not (from) executing the commands they receive from Allah, but do (precisely) what they are commanded.”102

289. Sahih Muslim, narrating from Abu Hurayrah who said: “When this verse was revealed: ‘And warn your nearest relations’103, the Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.) invited Quraysh and they gathered,

then he told them all in general and specifically: “O children of Ka’b ibn Lu’ay! 104 Save yourselves from the Fire! O children of Murrah ibn Ka’b!105 Save yourselves from the Fire!

O children of ‘Abd Shams! Save yourselves from the Fire! O children of ‘Abd Manaf! Save yourselves from the Fire! O children of Hashim!106 Save yourselves from the Fire! O children of ‘Abd al-Muttalib!107 Save yourselves from the Fire!

O Fatimah! Save yourself from the Fire! Because I cannot guarantee for you anything from Allah, except that you have the right of relationship to which I relate with you in this world [and it cannot benefit you in the Hereafter].”108

290. al-Durr al-Manthur, narrating from Zaid ibn Aslam: “The Prophet of Allah (s.a.w.) recited this verse: “…save yourselves and your families from a fire …”109 He (s.a.w.) was asked: “O the Messenger of Allah! How can we save our family from the Fire?” He said: “Enjoin them to what Allah likes and prohibit them from what Allah dislikes.”110

291. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said, in a letter to one of his agents: “Fear Allah and return to these people their properties. If you do not do so and Allah grants me power over you I shall excuse myself before Allah about you and strike you with my sword that I have not struck anyone without them going to Hell. By Allah, even if Hasan and Husayn had done what you did, there would have been no leniency with me to them and they could not have won their way with me till I had received the right from them and destroyed the wrong produced by their unjust action.”111

292. al-Kafi, narrating from Abu Basir: “I asked Abu ‘Abdullah [al-Sadiq] (a.s.) about the saying of Allah: “Save yourselves and your families from a fire…”112 “How can we save our families.” He (a.s.) said: “By enjoining them [to good] and forbidding them [from evil].”113

293. Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) said: “When the verse: “O you who believe! Save yourselves and your families from a fire…”114 was revealed, one of the Muslims began weeping and said: “I was not able to manage my own affairs and I became obliged to my family.” The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “It is enough for you to enjoin them to what you would enjoin yourself, and forbid them from what you forbid yourself.”115

294. al-Kafi, narrating from Abu Basir: “[I asked Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.)] “Concerning the saying of Allah: “…Save yourselves and your families from a Fire…”116: I asked: “How can I save them?”

He replied: “Enjoin them to what Allah orders and forbid them from what Allah forbids. If they obey you, you have saved them, and if they disobey you, you have fulfilled your obligation.”117

الصَّلابَةُ وعَدَمُ المُداهَنَةِ

(يا أَيُّهَا الَّذِينَ آمَنُوا قُوا أَنْفُسَكُمْ وَ أَهْلِيكُمْ ناراً وَقُودُهَا النَّاسُ وَ الْحِجارَةُ عَلَيْها مَلائِكَةٌ غِلاظٌ شِدادٌ لا يَعْصُونَ اللَّهَ ما أَمَرَهُمْ وَ يَفْعَلُونَ ما يُؤْمَرُونَ).

289. صحيح مسلم عن أبي هريرة: لَمّا انزِلَت هذِهِ الآيَةُ: (وَ أَنْذِرْ عَشِيرَتَكَ الْأَقْرَبِينَ) دَعا رَسولُ اللهِ صلى الله عليه وآله قُرَيشاً فَاجتَمَعوا، فَعَمَّ وخَصَّ، فَقالَ:

يا بَني كَعبِ بنِ لُؤيّ‏ ! أنقِذوا أنفُسَكُم مِنَ النّارِ.

يا بَني مُرَّةَ بنِ كَعبٍ‏ ! أنقِذوا أنفُسَكُم مِنَ النّارِ.

يا بَنِي عَبدِ شَمسٍ! أنقِذوا أنفُسَكُم مِنَ النّارِ.

يا بَني عَبدِ مَنافٍ‏ ! أنقِذُوا أنفُسَكُم مِنَ النّارِ.

يا بَني هاشِمٍ‏ ! أنقِذُوا أنفُسَكُم مِنَ النّارِ.

يا بَني عَبدِ المُطَّلِبِ! أنقِذوا أنفُسَكُم مِنَ النّارِ.

يا فاطِمَةُ! أنقِذي نَفسَكِ مِنَ النّارِ؛ فَإِنّي لا أملِكُ لَكُم مِنَ اللهِ شَيئاً، غَيرَ أنَّ لَكُم رَحِما سَأَبُلُّها بِبِلالِها .

290. الدرّ المنثور عن زيد بن أسلم: تَلا رَسولُ الله صلى الله عليه وآله هذِهِ الآيَةَ: «قُوا أَنْفُسَكُمْ وَ أَهْلِيكُمْ ناراً»، فَقالوا: يا رَسولَ اللهِ، كَيفَ نَقِي أهلَنا نارا؟

قالَ: تَأمرونَهُم بِما يُحِبُّهُ اللهُ، وتَنهَونَهُم عَمَّا يَكرَهُ اللهُ.

291. الإمام عليّ عليه السلام- فِي كِتابِهِ إلى بَعضِ عُمّالِهِ- فَاتَّقِ اللهَ وَاردُد إلى هؤلاءِ القَومِ أموالَهُم، فَإِنَّكَ إن لَم تَفعَل ثُمَّ أمكَنَنِي اللهُ مِنكَ لَاعذِرَنَّ إلَى اللهِ فيكَ، ولَاءَضرِبَنَّكَ بِسَيفِي الَّذي ما ضَرَبتُ بِهِ أحَدا إلّا دَخَلَ النّارَ، ووَاللهِ لَو أنَّ الحَسَنَ وَالحُسَينَ فَعَلا مِثلَ الَّذي فَعَلتَ ما كانَت لَهُما عِندي هَوادَةٌ، ولا ظَفِرا مِنّي بِإِرادَةٍ حَتّى آخُذَ الحَقَّ مِنهُما، وازيحَ الباطِلَ عَن مَظلَمَتِهِما.

292. الكافي عن أبي بصير: سَألتُ أبا عبد الله عليه السلام في قَولِ اللهِ: «قُوا أَنْفُسَكُمْ وَ أَهْلِيكُمْ ناراً»: كَيفَ نَقي أهلَنا؟ قَالَ: تَأمرونَهُم وَتَنهَونَهُم.

293. الإمام الصادق عليه السلام: لَمّا نَزَلَت هذهِ الآيَةُ: (يا أَيُّهَا الَّذِينَ آمَنُوا قُوا أَنْفُسَكُمْ وَ أَهْلِيكُمْ ناراً) جَلَسَ رَجُلٌ مِنَ المُسلِمينَ يَبكي وقالَ: أنا عَجَزتُ عَن نَفسي، كُلِّفتُ أهلي؟! فَقالَ رَسولُ اللهِ صلى الله عليه وآله: حَسبُكَ أن تأمُرَهُم بِما تَأمُرُ بِهِ نَفسَكَ، وتَنهاهُم عَمَّا تَنهى عَنهُ نَفسَكَ.

294. الكافي عن أبي بصير- في قَولِ اللهِ عزّ وجلِ: (قُوا أَنْفُسَكُمْ وَ أَهْلِيكُمْ ناراً)- قُلتُ: كَيفَ أقيهِم؟ قالَ: تَأمُرُهُم بِما أمَرَ اللهُ وتَنهاهُمُ عَمَّا نَهاهُمُ اللهُ، فَإن أطاعوكَ كُنتَ قَد وَقَيتَهُم، وإن عَصَوكَ كُنتَ قَد قَضَيتَ ما عَلَيكَ.

C- Practical Disciplining
295. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said: “He who appoints himself as the leader of people should begin by teaching himself before teaching others and he should discipline them through his actions before he disciplines them by speaking to them. He who educates and disciplines his own self deserves more appraisal than the teacher and discipliner of others”118

296. Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) said: “Be inviters to people by means other than your tongue, so that people see piety, diligence, prayer and goodness from you, for this is the correct way to invite.”119

التَّأديبُ العَمَلِيّ‏

295. الإمام عليّ عليه السلام: مَن نَصَبَ نَفسَهُ لِلنّاسِ إماماً فَليَبدَأ بِتَعليمِ نَفسِهِ قَبلَ تَعليمِ غَيرِهِ، وليَكُن تَأديبُهُ بِسيرَتِهِ قَبلَ تَأديبِهِ بِلِسانِهِ. ومُعَلِّمُ نَفسِهِ ومُؤَدِّبُها أَحَقُّ بِالإِجلالِ مِن‏

مُعَلِّمِ النّاسِ ومُؤَدِّبِهِم.

296. الإمام الصادق عليه السلام: كونوا دُعاةً لِلنّاسِ بِغَيرِ ألسِنَتِكُم؛ لِيَرَوا مِنكُمُ الوَرَعَ وَالاجتِهادَ وَالصَّلاةَ وَالخَيرَ، فَإِنَّ ذلِكَ داعِيَةٌ.

An Analysis on the Methods of Upbringing Children
Scholars have introduced four methods for upbringing children, and a further fifth point can be found by studying the Islamic sources. They are as follows:

1- The upbringing Method Based on Strictness
Children who were raised with this upbringing method which was mainly practiced by the old and previous generations would not feel any love and affection, and it would often result in anxiety, depression, stress and, at times, even suicide. However, this strictness could cause the child to become responsible and hard working, and parents did not show affection to their children due to the fear that they may become spoiled. They believed that any praise and admiration can cause the child to become spoiled.

2- The upbringing Method Based on Kindness and Lack of Strictness

This method which was formed in reaction to the first method leads the child to become spoiled, morally weak, dependant, demanding and childish. Moreover, they will lack resistance, patience against difficulties and would face problems in their family and social lives. Such children do not sense lack of affection and the parents who adopt this method tend to assume their children are right. They give to the child whatever he pleases and they try to avoid any way of displeasing him. In this method, the parents believe that the children are always right, and whatever a child wants must be given to him and we must not upset him in any way.

3- The Upbringing Method Based on Lack of Kindness and Lack of Strictness
This upbringing method trains children, who are entangled with sentimental disorder due to not receiving affection, and as there is no decisiveness concerning them, they tend to incline to crime and wrong-doing.

4- The Upbringing Method Based on Affection and Decisiveness
In this upbringing method children satiate sentimentally and are also raised as being studious, patient and accepting of responsibilities.

Scholars in this field have recognized this method as the being best method for upbringing a child.

However, what is the viewpoint of Islam in this regard? In religious instructions, there are different discussions in this concern, but the important matter is to know the overall system that dominates these issues and deduct an upbringing method from them. Seemingly, the method that we can take from the holy Qur’an and the traditions and is derived from them that which is mentioned in the fifth method.

5- The Upbringing Method Based on Love, Strictness and Dignity

From an Islamic viewpoint, love is one of the principles of the upbringing of a child and has strongly been emphasized upon and the lack of loving and affection has been strongly reproached. However, at the same time, excessive love and affection has also been admonished. Therefore, along with love, firmness and strictness in upbringing a child is also strongly recommended.

Based on this principle, while the child receives affection, he is not free and left to himself to do whatever he wants. On the other side, while he is being raised, he is also given kindness, affection and tolerance; and it is for this reason that he has been reproached from excessive scorning and violence, which is one of the pillars of the method of harshness without affection.

There is a third dimension in the upbringing method of Islam, which is ‘dignifying’.

Dignifying a child means to honour him and giving value for him. In the Islamic approach, a child must not be degraded just because of being a child, and he must not feel that he is worthless or of little value. A child is mostly in need of affection, and an adult is mostly in need of respect,120 yet this does not mean that the personality of a child must not be respected. The same goes to elders, as one must not forget to respect them, and be kind and loving towards them.

The child who is given value and his personality is respected and honoured feels worthiness with honour and self-dignity, and one who considers value for himself, does not engage in obscenities.

Self-dignity is the main pivot of Islamic morals and upbringing, and its most important way is to respect and dignify people, in particular during childhood. Of course, the concept of dignity is one part of what relates to the teaching of good and bad, but ‘dignifying’ is a very valuable and important concept.

One of the most important upbringing points that must be observed in the respecting of the personality of a child is to take his feelings into consideration during the first seven years of his life. This subject is so important that according to a tradition from the Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.), this age period is counted as the term of the supremacy of a child. He (s.a.w.) said:

“A child is a master for seven years.”

Mastership and supremacy of the child calls for his commandment and obedience from the parents, which means that during his first seven years, a child must command in the house, and therefore, whatever he wants must be provided if it is not harmful for him and it is possible for the parents to do so.

The result of the upbringing of the child as a commander during his first seven years and the correct submission of the parents to him will be the absolute obedience of the child and his love to the parents for the duration of his next seven years. The tradition continues by saying:

“And he is a servant for [the second] seven years.”

The obedience of a child to his parents is the result of the utmost confidence that he has in them which he acquired during the first seven years of his life. The appearance of this state in the child during the second seven years which is the time of his education is of extraordinary importance for his upbringing.

After finishing the second seven years of the child’s life, there comes the period of his ministry in the family, as the tradition continues saying:

“And he is a minister for [the third] seven years.”

In this period the child is no more a servant. The gratification of the personality of the child requires that, as being the minister of the family, he should be consulted with and the things that he is capable of doing can be given to him to do. Consequently, the responsibility of the family in the child’s upbringing and education ends.

3.7: The Banes of Upbringing

A) Excessiveness in Love
297. Imam al-Baqir (a.s.) said: “The worst father is he whose kindness is excessive, and the worst child is the one whose negligence makes him disobey [his parents].”121

آفاتُ التَّأديبِ‏

الإفراطُ فِي المَحَبَّةِ

297. الإمام الباقر عليه السلام: شَرُّ الآباءِ مَن دَعاهُ البِرُّ إلَى الإِفراطِ، وشَرُّ الأَبناءِ مَن دَعاهُ التَّقصيرُ إلَى العُقوق.

B) Excessiveness in Reprimanding

298. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said: “Excessive blame causes the fire of obstinacy to flame.”122

299. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said: “Avoid reprimanding constantly, for this act provokes the committing of sin and belittles [a real] reprimanding.”123

300. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said, in one of the wise sayings attributed to him: “If you reprimanded a youth, leave for him a place [for excusing] from his fault, lest he would be drawn to coarseness.”124

الإفراطُ فِي المَلامَةِ

298. الإمام عليّ عليه السلام: الإِفراطُ فِي المَلامَةِ يَشُبُّ نيرانَ اللَّجاجِ.

299. عنه عليه السلام: إيّاكَ أن تُكَرِّرَ العَتَبَ؛ فَإِنَّ ذلكَ يُغري بِالذَّنبِ، ويُهَوِّنُ العُتبَ.

300. عنه عليه السلام- فِي الحِكَمِ المَنسوبَةِ إِلَيهِ: إذا عاتَبتَ الحَدَثَ فَاترُك لَهُ مَوضِعاً مِن ذَنبِهِ؛ لَئِلّا يَحمِلُهُ الإِخراج عَلَى المُكابَرَةِ.

C) Disciplining at a Time of Anger

301. al-Kafi, narrating from ‘Ali ibn Asbat, from one of our companions [a Shi’i] who said: “The Prophet of Allah (s.a.w.) prohibited punishing at the time of anger.”125

302. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said: “Disciplining is impossible with anger.”126

التَّأديبُ عِندَ الغَضَبِ‏

301. الكافي عن عليّ بن أسباط عن بعض أصحابنا، قال‏ : نَهى رَسولُ اللهِ صلى الله عليه وآله عَنِ الأَدَبِ عِندَ الغَضَبِ.

302. الإمام عليّ عليه السلام: لا أدَبَ مَعَ غَضَبٍ.

D) Harshness
303. al-Kafi, narrating from Yunus ibn Ribat from Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) who said: “The Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.) said: “May Allah bless he who helps his child in obeying him.”

Someone asked: “How can he help him in obedience?”

He (s.a.w.) said: “That he accepts as little as the child can do, he forgives whatever he cannot do, he should not overburden him and not ask him to do things too hard for him, for there is nothing between him and entering a realm of the realms of disbelief other than that he disobeys his parents or cuts the ties of his kin.”127

304. Sahih Muslim, narrating from ‘A’ishah who said: “The Prophet of Allah never hit anyone with his hand, neither any woman nor any servant, except while fighting (jihad) in the path of Allah.”128

305. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said, from the wise sayings attributed to him: “Give priority to justice over harshness and you will win love, and do not take action when speaking has an effect.”129

306. ‘Uddah al-Da’i narrates that someone had said: “I complained to Abu al-Hasan Musa [al-Kazim] (a.s.) about my son and he said: “Do not beat him, but just forsake him and do not prolong it!”130

الخُشونَةُ

303. الكافي عن يونس بن رباط عن الإمام الصادق عليه السلام: قالَ رَسولُ اللهِ صلى الله عليه وآله: رَحِمَ اللهُ مَن أعانَ وَلَدَهُ عَلى بِرِّهِ.

قالَ: قُلتُ: كَيفَ يُعينُهُ عَلى بِرِّهِ؟

قالَ: يَقبَلُ مَيسورَهُ، ويَتَجاوَزُ عَن مَعسورِهِ، ولا يُرهِقُهُ، ولا يَخرَقُ بِهِ‏ ، فَلَيسَ بَينَهُ وبَينَ أن يَصيرَ في حَدٍّ مِن حُدودِ الكُفرِ إلّا أن يَدخُلَ في عُقوقٍ أو قَطيعَةِ رَحِمٍ.

304. صحيح مسلم عن عائشة: ما ضَرَبَ رَسولُ اللهِ صلى الله عليه وآله شَيئا قَطُّ بِيَدِهِ، ولَا امرَأَةً وَلا خادِماً، إلّا أن يُجاهِدَ في سَبيلِ اللهِ.

305. الإمام عليّ عليه السلام- فِي الحِكَمِ المَنسوبَةِ إلَيهِ- قَدِّمِ العَدلَ عَلَى البَطشِ تَظفَر بِالمَحَبَّةِ، ولا تَستَعمِل الفِعلَ حَيثُ يَنجَعُ‏ القَولُ.

306. عدّة الداعي: قالَ بَعضُهُم: شَكَوتُ إلى أبِي الحَسَنِ موسى عليه السلام ابناً لي، فَقالَ: لا تَضرِبهُ، وَاهجُرهُ ولا تُطِل.

3.8: Sex Education

A) Separating Beds

307. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “Separate the beds of a boy and a boy, a boy and a girl, a girl and a girl when they reach the age of ten.”131

308. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “When your children become seven years old, separate their beds.”132

309. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said: “When a child becomes seven years old, his teeth begin to fall, and when he is nine years old he is commanded to prayer, and when he is ten years old his bed must be separated.”133

310. Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) said: “When boys turn ten, their beds are to be separated from those of women.”134

التَّربِيَةُ الجِنسِيَّةُ

التَّفريقُ بَينَ الصَّبِيّ وَالصَّبِيّةِ فِي المَضاجِعِ‏

307. رسول الله صلى الله عليه وآله: الصَّبِيّ وَالصَّبِيّ، وَالصَّبِيّ وَالصَّبِيَّةُ، وَالصَّبِيَّةُ وَالصَّبِيَّةُ يُفرَّقُ بَينَهُم في المَضاجِعِ لِعَشرِ سِنينَ.

308. عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: إذا بَلَغَ أولادُكُم سَبعَ سِنينَ فَفَرِّقوا بَينَ فُرُشِهِم.

309. الإمام عليّ عليه السلام: يَثَّغِرُ الصَّبِيّ لِسَبعٍ، ويُؤمَرُ بِالصَّلاةِ لِتِسعٍ، ويُفَرَّقُ بَينَهُم فِي المَضاجِعِ لِعَشرٍ.

310. الإمام الصادق عليه السلام: يُفَرَّقُ بَينَ الغِلمانِ وَالنِّساءِ فِي المَضاجِعِ اذا بَلَغوا عَشرَ سِنينَ.

B) Avoidance of Looking at the Private Parts of the Child and the Child Looking at Those of Others

311. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “Parents should not look at their child’s private parts and it is not right that the child looks at the father’s private parts.”135

312. al-Mustadrak ‘ala al-Sahihain, narrating from Muhammad ibn Bayad who said: “I was taken to the Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.) when I was ten years old and I had some torn clothing on my body and some of my private parts were seen. He (s.a.w.) said: “Cover his nakedness because the veneration of a child’s private parts is the same as veneration of that of an adult, and Allah does not look at one who reveals his private parts.”136

313. Imam al-Baqir (a.s.) said: “‘Ali ibn al-Husayn [al-Sajjad] (a.s.) would say when delivery time of a woman approached: “Send out the women who are in the room. A woman must not be the first one to look at the newborn’s private parts.”137 138

النَّهيُ عَنِ النَّظَرِ إلى عَورَةِ الطِّفلِ وبِالعَكسِ‏

311. رسول الله صلى الله عليه وآله: لَيسَ لِلوالِدَينِ أن يَنظُرا إلى عَورَةِ الوَلَدِ، ولَيسَ لِلولَدِ أن يَنظُرَ إلى عَورَةِ الوَالِدِ.

312. المستدرك على الصحيحين عن محمّد بن بياض: رُفِعتُ إلى رَسولِ اللهِ صلى الله عليه وآله في صِغَري وعَلَيّ خِرقَةٌ وقَد كُشِفَت عَورَتي، فَقالَ: غَطُّوا حُرمَةَ عَورَتِهِ؛ فَإِنَّ حُرمَةَ عَورَةِ الصَّغيرِ كَحُرمَةِ عَورَةِ الكَبيرِ … .

313. الإمام الباقر عليه السلام: كانَ عَلِيّ بنُ الحُسَينِ عليه السلام إذا حَضَرَ وِلادَةُ المَرأةِ قالَ: أخرِجوا مَن فِي البَيتِ مِنَ النِّساءِ؛ لا تَكونُ المَرأَةُ أوَّلَ ناظِرٍ إلى عَورَتِهِ‏ .

C) The Permissible Limit of Kissing a Boy and a Girl

314. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “When a girl becomes six years old do not kiss her, and when a boy completes seven years of age he should not kiss women.”139

315. Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) said: “When a free girl turns six years old, it is recommended that you do not kiss her.”140

316. Tahdhib al-Ahkam, narrating from ‘Ali ibn “Aqabah, from one of the Shi’ah who said: “Abu al-Hasan [al-Kazim] (a.s.) was with Muhammad ibn Ibrahim who was the governor of Mecca and the husband of Fatimah, the daughter of Abu ‘Abdullah al-Sadiq (a.s.). Muhammad ibn Ibrahim had a daughter who used to be given beautiful clothing wear and she would come close to men and they would hug her. When she got to Abu al-Hasan [al-Kazim], he stopped her with his hands stretched out and said: “When a girl turns six it is not permissible for a foreign [non-mahram] man to kiss her and embrace her.”141

حَدُّ جَوازِ تَقبيلِ الجارِيَةِ وَالغُلامِ‏

314. رسول الله صلى الله عليه وآله: إذا بَلَغَتِ الجارِيَةُ سِتَّ سِنينَ فَلا تُقَبِّلها، وَالغُلامُ لا يُقَبِّلُ المَرأَةَ إذا جاوَزَ سَبعَ سِنينَ.

315. الإمام الصادق عليه السلام: إذا بَلَغَتِ الجارِيَةُ الحُرَّةُ سِتَّ سِنينَ فَلا يَنبَغي لَكَ أن تُقَبِّلَها.

316. تهذيب الأحكام عن عليّ بن عقبة عن بعض أصحابنا: كانَ أبُو الحَسَنِ الماضي عليه السلام عِندَ مُحمَّدِ بنِ إبراهيمَ والي مَكَّةَ، وهُو زَوجُ فاطِمَةَ بِنتِ أبي عَبدِ اللهِ، وكانَت لِمُحَمَّدِ بنِ إبراهيمَ بِنتٌ تُلبِسُها الثِّيابَ وتَجي‏ءُ إلَى الرِّجالِ فَيَأخُذُها الرَّجُلُ ويَضُمُّها إلَيهِ، فَلَمّا تَناهَت إلى أبي الحَسَنِ عليه السلام أمسَكَها بِيَدَيهِ مَمدودَتَينِ، قالَ: إذا أتَت عَلَى الجارِيَةِ سِتُّ سِنينَ لَم يَجُز أن يُقَبِّلَها رَجُلٌ لَيسَ هِيَ بِمَحرَمٍ لَهُ، ولا يَضُمَّها إلَيهِ.

D) Asking Permission for Entering the Parents’ Room

“O you who believe! Do let those whom your right hands possess, and those of you who have not reached to puberty, ask permission of you at three times (for coming into your room): before the morning prayer, and at midday when you put off your clothes, and after the night prayer. (These are) three times of privacy for you. It is no sin for you or for them (if) after those (three times), some of you go round attendant upon the others. Thus, does Allah make clear the revelations for you; and Allah is All-knowing, All-wise.” “And when the children among you reach puberty then let them ask permission even as those before them used to ask it. Thus, does Allah make clear His revelations for you? Allah is All-knower, All-wise.”142

317. al-Sunan al-Kubra, narrating from ‘Ata’ ibn Yasar who said: “A man asked the Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.): “O Messenger of Allah! Do I ask permission for entering to see my mother?”

He answered: “Yes.”

The man said: “I live in the same room with her.”

He (s.a.w.) said: “Ask permission from her.”

The man said: “I am serving her.”

The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “Do you like to see her naked?”

The man answered: “No.”

He (s.a.w.) said: “Then ask permission from her.”143

318. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said: “A man came to the Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.) and said: “O Messenger of Allah! Do I ask permission when I want to enter and see my mother?”

He (s.a.w.) said: “Yes. Do you like seeing her naked?”

The man said: “No.”

He (s.a.w.) said: “Then ask for her permission.”144

319. Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) said: “When a man wants to enter his father’s room, he should ask for permission, but it is not necessary for a father to ask permission from his son.” He [then] said: “And he must ask for permission from his daughter and his sister when they are married.”145

320. Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) said: “Those who are in your possession and those who have not reached puberty should ask permission in three times as Allah has commanded you. He who has reached puberty should not enter his mother’s room, nor his sister’s, or aunt’s room or the rooms of other people without permission. Do not give permission for entry unless he greets.”146

321. al-Kafi, narrating from Muhammad ibn ‘Ali al-Halabi who said: “I asked Abu ‘Abdullah [al-Sadiq] (a.s.): “Must a man ask permission to enter his father’s room?”

He (a.s.) answered: “Yes. I used to ask permission from my father and my mother was not with him, but it was my father’s wife. My mother died when I was young. They might be doing something in their privacy that I would not like to interfere in, and nor would they like me to intrude. Giving greetings [for asking for permission to enter] is the most correct and better way.”147

الاستِئذانُ لِلدُّخولِ إلَى الوالِدَينِ‏

(يا أَيُّهَا الَّذِينَ آمَنُوا لِيَسْتَأْذِنْكُمُ الَّذِينَ مَلَكَتْ أَيْمانُكُمْ وَ الَّذِينَ لَمْ يَبْلُغُوا الْحُلُمَ مِنْكُمْ ثَلاثَ مَرَّاتٍ مِنْ قَبْلِ صَلاةِ الْفَجْرِ وَ حِينَ تَضَعُونَ ثِيابَكُمْ مِنَ الظَّهِيرَةِ وَ مِنْ بَعْدِ صَلاةِ الْعِشاءِ ثَلاثُ عَوْراتٍ لَكُمْ لَيْسَ عَلَيْكُمْ وَ لا عَلَيْهِمْ جُناحٌ بَعْدَهُنَّ طَوَّافُونَ عَلَيْكُمْ بَعْضُكُمْ عَلى‏ بَعْضٍ كَذلِكَ يُبَيِّنُ اللَّهُ لَكُمُ الْآياتِ وَ اللَّهُ عَلِيمٌ حَكِيمٌ* وَ إِذا بَلَغَ الْأَطْفالُ مِنْكُمُ الْحُلُمَ فَلْيَسْتَأْذِنُوا كَمَا اسْتَأْذَنَ الَّذِينَ مِنْ قَبْلِهِمْ كَذلِكَ يُبَيِّنُ اللَّهُ لَكُمْ آياتِهِ وَ اللَّهُ عَلِيمٌ حَكِيمٌ).

317. السنن الكبرى عن عطاء بن يسار أنَّ رَسولَ اللهِ صلى الله عليه وآله سَأَلَهُ رَجُلٌ فَقالَ: أستَأذِنُ يا رَسولَ اللهِ عَلى امِّي؟

فَقالَ: نَعَم. فَقالَ: إنِّي مَعَها فِي البَيتِ!

فَقالَ: استَأذِن عَلَيها. فَقالَ الرَّجُلُ: إنّي خادِمُها!

فَقالَ: أتحِبُّ أن تَراها عُريانَةً؟! قالَ: لا.

قالَ: فَاستَأذِن عَلَيها.

318. الإمام عليّ عليه السلام: أتى رَجُلٌ إلى رَسولِ اللهِ صلى الله عليه وآله قالَ: يا رَسولَ اللهِ، هَل أستَأذِنُ عَلى امّي إذا أرَدتُ الدُّخولَ عَلَيها؟ قالَ: نَعَم، أيَسُرُّكَ أن تَراها عُريانَةً؟! قالَ: لا.

قالَ: فَاستَأذِن عَلَيها إذاً.

319. الإمام الصادق عليه السلام: يَستأذِنُ الرَّجُلُ إذا دَخَل عَلَى أبيهِ، ولا يَستَأذِنُ الأَبُ عَلَى الابنِ.

قالَ: ويَستأذِنُ الرَّجُلُ عَلَى ابنَتِهِ واختِهِ إذا كانَتا مُتَزَوِّجَتَينِ.

320. عنه عليه السلام: لِيَستَأذِنِ الَّذينَ مَلَكَت أيمانُكُم وَالَّذينَ لَم يَبلُغُوا الحُلُمَ مِنكُم ثَلاثَ مَرَّاتٍ كَما أمَرَكُمُ اللهُ عزّ وجلّ، ومَن بَلَغَ الحُلُمَ فَلا يَلِجُ عَلى امِّهِ ولا عَلى اختِهِ ولا عَلى خالَتِهِ ولا عَلى سِوى ذلِكَ إلّا بإذنٍ، فَلا تَأذَنوا حَتّى يُسَلِّمَ.

321. الكافي عن محمّد بن عليّ الحلبي: قُلتُ لِأَبي عَبدِ اللهِ عليه السلام: الرَّجُلُ يَستَأذِنُ عَلى أبيهِ؟ فَقالَ: نَعَم، قَد كُنتُ أستَأذِنُ عَلى أبي ولَيسَت امّي عِندَهُ، وإنَّما هِيَ امرَأَةُ أبي، تُوُفِّيَت أُمِّي وأنا غُلامٌ، وقَد يَكونُ مِن خَلوَتِهِما ما لا احِبُّ أن أفجَأَهُما عَلَيهِ، ولا يُحِبّانِ ذلِكَ مِنّي، وَالسَّلامُ أصوَبُ وأحسَنُ.

F) The Danger of a Child Seeing his Parents Copulate

322. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “By He who owns my soul, if one was to have intercourse with his wife in a room where a little child is awake and can see them and hear their voice and the sound of their breathing, that person will never prosper. If the child is a boy, he will become an adulterer, and if it is a girl, she will become an adulteress.”148

322. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said: “The Prophet of Allah prohibited that a man has intercourse with his wife while there is a baby in the cradle and looks at them.”149

323. Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) said: “At the time when there is a child in the room, a man should not have intercourse with his wife or with his bound-maid, for this act is among the things that causes adultery thereafter.”150

خَطَرُ نَظَرِ الأَطفالِ إلى وِقاعِ الوَالِدَينِ‏

322. رسول الله صلى الله عليه وآله: وَالَّذي نَفسي بِيَدِهِ، لَو أنَّ رَجُلًا غَشِيَ امرَأَتَهُ وفِي البَيتِ صَبِيّ مُستَيقِظٌ يَراهُما ويَسمَعُ كَلامَهُما ونَفَسَهُما ما أفلَحَ أبَداً؛ إذا كانَ غُلاماً كانَ زانِياً، أو جارِيَةً كانَت زانِيَةً.

323. الإمام عليّ عليه السلام: نَهى رَسولُ اللهِ صلى الله عليه وآله أن يُجامِعَ الرَّجُلُ امرَأَتَهُ وَالصَّبِيّ فِي المَهدِ يَنظُرُ إلَيهِما.

324. الإمام الصادق عليه السلام: لا يُجامِعِ الرَّجُلُ امرَأَتَهُ ولا جارِيَتَهُ وفِي البَيتِ صَبِيّ؛ فَإِنَّ ذلِكَ مِمَّا يورِثُ الزِّنا.

Some Words about Sex Education

Like all other aspects of the human being, sexual instinct is something that is in need of training, and every culture and ideology has a particular view about this kind of training and education. From the viewpoint of Islam, sex education means providing the grounds of growth and education of the sexual drive in a manner that both sexual chastity is achieved and so is sexual wellbeing. This is one of the features of the viewpoint of religion in that not only does it attend to the sexual wellbeing of a person and his health, but it also focuses on the aspect of sexual chastity.

Another important point is that the attempts to acquire these goals are not subject to being at the age of puberty. According to religious teachings, sex education begins before the age of puberty and it starts from a very young age. Therefore, obtaining these goals in any age is in need of certain particular procedures and plans, and these are referred to in religious texts. The childhood period is the most important stage of life, and any mistake can lead to some irreparable future consequences.

Necessary Planning for Sexual Chastity

Some families do not pay enough attention to the sexual affairs of their children for the reason that they think their children are still too young, even though many of the things that children see or hear have a determining impact on their sexual behaviour in future. Both sexual chastity and deviation are existent in a child, and it should not be forgotten that learning in the childhood period is very effective. Whatever a child learns will be fixed and established in him like a carving on a stone, and whatever is given to him he accepts. This is why Islam has paid attention to this part of the child’s life and it has introduced some useful practical instructions which will be briefly pointed out here:

A- Covering the Private Parts
Looking at the private parts of a child and a child looking at the private parts of adults can be discussed from a jurisprudential and an upbringing point of view. From a jurisprudential point of view, it is not forbidden for a child to look at the private parts of an adult. It is also permissible for an adult to look at the private parts of a child, as long it is not a lustful look. However, the effects of covering and exposing cannot be ignored. The child being used to looking at other people’s private parts or others looking at his private parts belittles the vulgarity of this action and brings about negligence and makes indecency something normal. However, children who have not encountered these issues have higher resistance against sexual deviation and enjoy a higher level of chastity. Therefore, it is mentioned in religious texts that it is recommended that one should not look at a child’s private parts nor should he be allowed to look at the private parts of others, and also not to take children into the bathroom in a way that would make the private parts be exposed to others.

B- The Reproach of a Child Being Kissed by a Non-Mahram

Even though it is not jurisprudentially prohibited for a child to be kissed by a non-maÎram, but it does have a clear negative effect on a grown up child (who distinguishes between good and bad). Such things are recorded in the mind of a child and might be grounds for establishing relations with non-maÎrams in the future, making it difficult for him to observe chastity. Therefore, it is recommended that adults should not kiss children who are not maÎram to them.

C- Reproaching The Playing with a Child’s Private Parts
Playing with the sexual organs of a child may cause sexual stimulation and also premature puberty of the child. It teaches sexual perversion to the child and brings about sexual irregularity. Some Islamic narrations refer to this kind of playing as a branch of adultery, and such a harsh expression indicates the severe negative effect on the child. Therefore, in religious texts this action has been prohibited.

D- Separation of Beds
When grown up children are to sleep in one bed, this may result in inappropriate bodily contact, premature sexual stimulation, and might even lead to unlawful relationships. One of the plannings of religion for preventing this impediment is the separating of sleeping arrangements between brothers and sisters and boys and girls.

E- Hiding Any Sexual Contact of the Parents from the Children
The children’s awareness of the parents’ sexual relations is one of the factors that lead to sexual deviation. From the viewpoint of Islamic traditions, this practise has a close to certain and undeniable negative effect, and to prevent this, two solutions have been given: the child asking permission for entering into the parents’ room and their privacy, and the second is the practising of any sexual contact far from the presence of children.

1. Kanz al-Ummal, vol. 10, p. 249, h. 29336, narrating from al-Tabarani. al-Firdaws, vol. 4, p. 135, h. 6420, with ‘is like a drawing on a rock’ instead of ‘is like engraving on a stone’ Both narrating from Abu al-Darda’.

2. . Kanz al-Ummal, vol. 16, p. 584, h. 45953, narrating from Juz’ ibn ‘Amshaliq.

3. . Ghurar al-Hikam, h. 8273. ‘Uyun al-Hikam wa al-Mawa’iz, p. 447, h. 7879.

4. . Ghurar al-Hikam, h. 8937. ‘Uyun al-Hikam wa al-Mawa’iz, p. 463, h. 8424.

5. . Sunan al-Darami, vol. 1, p. 137, h. 517. Munyah al-Murid, p. 340.

6. . al-Diwan al-Mansub il’al-Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) [The collection of poems attributed to Imam ‘Ali (a.s.)], p. 242, h. 163.

7. . Shu’ab al-Iman, vol. 6, p. 401, h. 8667, narrating from ‘A’ishah. Kanz al-Ummal, vol. 16, p. 417, h. 45193.

8. . al-Mu’jam al-Awsat, vol. 4, p. 77, h. 3658, narrating from Salim ibn ‘Abdullah from his father. Kanz al-Ummal, vol. 16, p. 460, h. 45435, narrating from al-’Askari and Ibn al-Najjar.

9. . Sunan al-Tirmidhi, vol. 4, p. 338, h. 1952. al-Mustadrak ‘ala al-Sahihain, vol. 4, p. 292 h. 7679. al-Sunan al-Kubra, vol. 2, p. 28, h. 2273. All narrating from Ayyub ibn Musa from his father from his grand father.

10. . Makarim al-Akhlaq, vol. 1, p. 478, h. 1651. Sunan Ibn Majah, vol. 2, p. 1211, h. 3671. Tarikh Dimashq, vol. 7, p. 138, h. 4072. Both narrating from ‘Anas, without ‘you will be forgiven’.

11. . Tarikh al-Madinah, vol. 2, p. 568, narrating from Ibn ‘Abbas. Kanz al-Ummal, vol. 16, p. 473, h. 45512, narrating from Tarikh Dimashq from Ibn Mas’ud and Ibn ‘Abbas.

12. . al-Kafi, vol. 8, p. 150, h. 132, narrating from Mas’adah ibn Sadaqah. Ghurar al-Hikam, h. 5036.

13. . Da’a’im al-Islam, vol. 1, p. 82.

14. . Qisas al-Anbiya’, p. 194, h. 243, narrating from Hammad ibn ‘Isa. Tafsir al-Qummi, vol. 2, p. 164. Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 13, p. 411.

15. . Sahih Muslim, vol. 3, p. 1459, h. 20. Sunan Abu Dawud, vol. 3, p. 130, h. 2928. Both narrating from Ibn ‘Umar.

16. . Ghurar al-Hikam, h. 6199. ‘Uyun al-Hikam wa al-Mawa’iz, p. 328, h. 5637.

17. . Nahj al-Balaghah, Sermon 34. Ansab al-Ashraf, vol. 3, p. 154. Tarikh al-Tabari, vol. 5, p. 91. al-Kamil Fi al-Tarikh, vol. 2, p. 408. al-Imamah wa al-Siyasah, vol. 1, p. 171, with ‘I give you advice for the sake of Allah’ instead of ‘I give you advice’.

18. . Kitab Man la Yahdarhu al-Faqih, vol. 2, p. 622, h. 3214. al-Khisal, p. 568, h. 1. Both narrating from Abu Hamzah al-Thumali (Thabit ibn Dinar).

19. . Tuhaf al-’Uqul, p. 263, h. 23. Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 74, p. 15, h. 2.

20. . al-Mu’jam al-Awsat, vol. 5, p. 130, h. 4865, narrating from ‘A’ishah. al-Jami’ al-Saghir, vol. 2, p. 603, h. 8696.

21. . ‘Amal al-Yum wa al-Laylah by al-Dinwari, p. 150, h. 423, narrating from ‘Amr ibn Shu’ayb. Kanz al-Ummal, vol. 16, p. 440, h. 45328.

22. . Shu’ab al-Iman, vol. 6, p. 398, h. 8649, narrating from Ibn ‘Abbas. Kanz al-Ummal, vol. 16, p. 441, h. 45332.

23. . Qur’an, 66:6.

24. . al-Kafi, vol. 2, p. 211, h. 1. al-Mahasin, vol. 1, p. 362, h. 780. Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 74, p. 86, h. 101.

25. . al-Sawi’q al-Muhriqah, p. 172. Yanabi’ al-Mawaddah, vol. 2 p. 457, h. 268. Kanz al-Ummal, vol. 16, p. 456, h. 45409.

26. . Qur’an, 20:132.

27. . Qur’an, 19:54-55.

28. . Qur’an, 20:132.

29. . al-Kafi, vol. 5, p. 37, h. 1, narrating from ‘Aqil al-Khuza’i. Nahj al-Balaghah, Sermon 199. Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 33, p. 447, h. 659.

30. . Qur’an, 66:6.

31. . Qur’an, 20:132.

32. . al-Usul al-Sittah ‘Ashar, p. 70, narrating from Jabir al-Ju’fi. Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 2, p. 25, h. 92.

33. . Qur’an, 66:6.

34. . al-Mustadrak ‘ala al-Sahihain, vol. 2, p. 536, h. 3826. Shu’ab al-Iman, vol. 6, p. 411, h. 8704. Both narrating from Rib’i.

35. . Qur’an, 66:6.

36. . Munyah al-Murid, p. 380.

37. . Sunan Abu Dawud, vol. 1, p. 134, h. 497. al-Mu’jam al-Awsat, vol. 3, p. 235, h. 3019. Both narrating from Ma’adh ibn ‘Abdullah ibn Khabib al-Juhani.

38. . Jami’ al-Akhbar, p. 285, h. 767. Mustardak al-Wasa’il, vol. 15, p. 164, h. 17871.

39. . Da’a’im al-Islam, vol. 1, p. 193. Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 8, p. 133.

40. . Ghurar al-Hikam, h. 6305.

41. . al-Khisal, p. 626, h. 10, narrating from Muhammad ibn Muslim from Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) from his forefathers (a.s.). Tuhaf al-’Uqul, p. 115.

42. . Da’a’im al-Islam, vol. 1, p. 193. Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 88, p. 133, h. 5.

43. . al-Kafi, vol. 7, p. 86, h. 1. Tahdhib al-Ahkam, vol. 4, p. 296, h. 895. Both narrating from al-Zuhari.

44. . al-Kafi, vol. 3, p. 409, h. 1. Tahdhib al-Ahkam, vol. 2, p. 380, h. 1584. Both narrating from al-Halabi from Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.).

45. . Kitab Man la Yahdarhu al-Faqih, vol. 1, p. 281, h. 863. al-Amali, by al-Saduq, p. 475, h. 640, with ‘Imam al-Baqir (a.s.) or Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.)’. Both narrating from ‘Abdullah ibn Fadalah.

46. . Da’a’im al-Islam, vol. 1, p. 194. Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 88, p. 134, h. 5.

47. . Da’a’im al-Islam, vol. 1, p. 194. Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 88, p. 134, h. 5.

48. . al-Kafi, vol. 3, p. 206, h. 2, narrating from al-Halabi and Zurarah. Tahdhib al-Ahkam, vol. 2, p. 381, h. 1591, narrating from Ishaq ibn ‘Ammar.

49. . Tahdhib al-Ahkam, vol. 2, p. 381, h. 1590. al-Kafi, vol. 4, p. 125, h. 2.

50. . Shu’ab al-Iman, vol. 2, p. 330, h. 1949. al-Durr al-Manthur, vol. 5, p. 485. Both narrating from Ibn ‘Abbas.

51. . al-Amali, by al-Tusi, p. 357, h. 739, narrating from al-Nu’man ibn Sa’d from Imam ‘Ali (a.s.). Sunan Ibn Majah, vol. 1, p. 77, h. 213, narrating from Mus’ab ibn Sa’d from his father.

52. . Tarikh Dimashq, vol. 18, p. 99, narrating from Ma’adh ibn Jabal. Kanz al-Ummal, vol. 1, p. 540, h. 2421.

53. . al-Durr al-Manthur, vol. 8, p. 3, narrating from ‘Anas.

54. . al-Firdaws, vol. 1, p. 202, h. 1195. Tarikh Baghdad, vol. 7, p. 239, No 3733. Both narrating from ‘Anas.

55. . Shu’ab al-Iman, vol. 2, p. 523, h. 2593. Tarikh al-Kabir, vol. 3, p. 311, h. 1058. Kanz al-Ummal, vol. 1, p. 518, h. 2317, narrating from al-Bukhari and al-Bayhaqi. All narrating from Rajai’ al-Ghanawi.

56. . Sharh Nahj al-Balaghah, vol. 10, p. 21. Kanz al-Ummal, vol. 2, p. 288, h. 4026, narrating from Ibn al-Anbari in al-Masahif and al-Dinwari from al-Farazdaq.

57. . Nahj al-Balaghah, Wise Saying 399. Sharh Nahj al-Balaghah, vol. 19, p. 365.

58. . The angels who frequent between Allah (s.w.t.) and the Prophets (a.s.).

59. . al-Kafi, vol. 2, p. 603, h. 2. al-Amali by al-Saduq, p. 115, h. 96. Both narrating from al-Fudayl ibn Yasar.

60. . The Murji’ites is a sect who believes that faith is only a saying without action, and that statement has precedence over action. They believe that someone who abandons his religious practices can be saved by his faith. They say that with the existence of faith, sin does not cause harm in the same way as infidelity does not conflict with obedience.

61. . al-Khisal, p. 614, h. 10, narrating from Muhammad ibn Muslim from Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) from his forefathers (a.s.). Tuhaf al-’Uqul, p. 104.

62. . Tahdhib al-Ahkam, vol. 8, p. 111 h. 381. al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 47, h. 5, with ‘your children’ instead of ‘your youth’. Both narrating from Jamil al-Darraj.

63. . al-Sunan al-Kubra, vol. 10, p. 26, h. 19742. Shu’ab al-Iman, vol. 6, p. 401, h. 8665. Both narrating from Abu Rafay’.

64. . al-Fada’il, p. 129, narrating from Ibn Mas’ud. Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 8, p. 144, h.67.

65. . al-Mawa’iz al-’Adadiyah, p. 213.

66. . Qur’an, 7:31.

67. . Tibb al-Nabi (s.a.w.), p. 11.

68. . al-Da’awat, p. 75, h. 174. Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 62, p. 267, h. 42.

69. . Sharh Nahj al-Balaghah, vol. 20, p. 333, h. 824.

70. . Sharh Nahj al-Balaghah, vol. 20, p. 372, h. 149.

71. . al-Khisal, p. 229, h. 67, narrating from al-Asbagh ibn Nabatah. al-Da’awat, p. 74, h. 173. Tibb al-A’immah by Ibn Bassam, p. 3. Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 62, p. 267, h. 42.

72. . Ghurar al-Hikam, h. 6768. ‘Uyun al-Hikam wa al-Mawa’iz, p. 370, h. 6248.

73. . Ghurar al-Hikam, h. 9219. ‘Uyun al-Hikam wa al-Mawa’iz, p. 426, h. 7219.

74. . Nahj al-Balaghah, Wise Saying 171. Khasa’is al-A’immah, p. 110. Ghurar al-Hikam, h. 6933. Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 73, p. 166, h. 29.

75. . Ma’ani al-Akhbar, p. 401, h. 62 in Tuhaf al-’Uqul, p. 225. al-’Adad al-Qawiyah, p. 32, h. 22. al-Mu’jam al-Kabir, vol. 3, p. 68, h. 2688. Tarikh Dimashq, vol. 13, p. 255.

76. . Tuhaf al-’Uqul, p. 376. al-Khisal, p. 169, h. 222.

77. . Iman Abu Talib, also known as al-Hujjah ‘ala al-Dhahib ila Takfir Abu Talib, p. 130. Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 35, p. 115, h. 54.

78. . Abu Muhammad Sufyan ibn Mas’ab al-’Abdi al-Kufi was a poet who composed poems about Ahlul Bayt (a.s.), and he had sincere devotion for them and was also acknowledged by them. There is no correct date about his birth and death, but it is understood from some evidences that he was alive during the time of the death of Sayyid Humyari (178 A.H.).He had been very skilful in composing poetry and his poems were mostly on the of virtues of the Commander of the faithful (a.s.) and introducing Ahlul Bayt (a.s.), and also describing their sufferings and pains. This was done so much to the extent that ‘Allamah Amini claims that he could find no poetry from this poet that was not about Ahlul Bayt (a.s.). He recited poetry for the people about ‘‘Ashura’ at the house of Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) and made them so sad that because of their wailing the people of Medina crowded behind that house.He was one of the companions of Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) and his friendship was not an ordinary one. It was not for the sake of social interaction or because of living during the same time of the Imam (a.s.), but it was because of his sincere inclination, his pure friendship and his untainted faith, so much that the Imam (a.s.) wanted his followers to teach al-’Abdi’s poetry to their children since it was based on the religion of Allah. Some of his poems are mentioned in this book.

79. . Rijal al-Kashi, vol. 2, p. 704, h. 748, narrating from Sama’ah. Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 79, p. 293, h. 16.

80. . For more details on his complete collection of poetry refer to al-Ghadir, vol. 2, p. 290.

81. . al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 47, h. 4, narrating from Imam ‘Ali (a.s.). Usd al-Ghabah, vol. 1, p. 412, No. 488, with ‘your sons’ instead of ‘your chidlren’, narrating from ‘Abdullah ibn al-Rabi’ al-Ansari.

82. . Shu’ab al-Iman, vol. 6, p. 401, h. 8664, narrating from Ibn ‘Umar. al-Jami’ al-Saghir, vol. 2, p. 161, h. 5477.

83. . Children, whether male or female, must be taught what they need according to the requirements of that sex, even though in certain circumstances and different times these needs may vary. For example, in regards to boys, the purpose of archery is that it is a military art, and not only shooting with bow, and concerning girls, teaching them to spindle is not what is exclusively meant for all times, but it was mentioned in the tradition because of the need of that time. Moreover, girls and women must be trained with the necessary skills according to the requirements of the time and their own needs.

84. . al-Firdaws, vol. 3, p. 11, h. 4008, narrating from Jabir. Kanz al-Ummal, vol. 16, p. 443, h. 45341.

85. . A six years old child is mentally more capable than a two-year old child in accepting requests, guidance, in the imitating of the behaviour of others (who act as a model for the child to imitate), or other types of communications. As the child grows up, these kinds of innate communicative inputs will increasingly produce certain minor and delicate effects. The need of performing complex continual practices may bring about these abilities in a six year old child and will make him respond them, while in most cases the two year old child lacks the recognizing ability for responding to these kinds of directions.In early period of childhood, the controlled communications of a child to others is also an indication to some changes depending on the age.A two year old child can manifestly control the behaviour of those around him in particular delicate ways, and which he also does. Yet, he is never able to make others accept the conducts he has in mind in an ideal form with enjoying directions which are sometimes partial, oral, with bodily movement, bodily exhibitions, and the like which can be done by a six year old. Finally, the child who is in the state of growth can control his behaviour in an increasing form. (Rushdshenakhti, p. 106).

86. . al-Mu’jam al-Awsat, vol. 6, p. 170, h. 6104, narrating from Abu Jabirah. al-Firdaws, vol. 4, p. 430, h. 7252. Makarim al-Akhlaq, vol. 1, p. 478, h. 1649, with ‘his morals’ instead of ‘his upbringing’.

87. . Kitab Man la Yahdarhu al-Faqih, vol. 3, p. 493, h. 4746. Makarim al-Akhlaq, vol. 1, p. 478, h. 1653, with ‘be leniant’ instead of ‘be trained’.

88. . Sharh Nahj al-Balaghah, vol. 20, p. 343, h. 937.

89. . Nahj al-Balaghah, Letter 31. Kashf al-Mahajjah, p. 222, narrating from ‘Umar ibn Abu al-Miqdam from Imam al-Baqir (a.s.) from Imam ‘Ali (a.s.). Tuhaf al-’Uqul, p. 70.

90. . al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 46, h. 2. Tahdhib al-Ahkam, vol. 8, p. 111, h. 379. Both narrating from Yunus ibn Ya’qub.

91. . al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 47, h. 3, Tahdhib al-Ahkam, vol. 8, p. 111, h. 380. Both narrating Ya’qub ibn Salim.

92. . Sunan Ibn Majah, vol. 2, p. 1211, h. 3671. Tarikh Baghdad, vol. 8, p. 288, h. 4389. al-Firdaws, vol. 1, p. 67, h. 196. Both narrating from ‘Anas.

93. . Musnad Ibn Hanbal, vol. 7, p. 296, h. 20364. al-Musannif by Ibn Abu Shaybah, vol. 5, p. 38, h. 2. al-Tabaqat al-Kubra, vol. 7, p. 29.

94. . al-Mu’jam al-Kabir, vol. 2, p. 269, h. 2130. Usd al-Ghabah, vol. 1, p. 534 h. 740. al-Isabah, vol. 1, p. 586, h. 1153, with ‘disobey me’ instead of ‘makes me angry’.

95. . Misbah al-Shari’ah, p. 370. Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 2, p. 53, h. 21.

96. . Nahj al-Balaghah, Wise Saying 177. Khasa’is al-A’immah, p. 110. Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 75, p. 44, h. 12.

97. . Ghurar al-Hikam, h. 6328- 6329. ‘Uyun al-Hikam wa al-Mawa’iz, p. 339 h. 5776- 5777.

98. . Ghurar al-Hikam, h. 4497. ‘Uyun al-Hikam wa al-Mawa’iz, p. 201, h. 4086.

99. . Ghurar al-Hikam, h. 1161.

100. . Ghurar al-Hikam, h. 5342. ‘Uyun al-Hikam wa al-Mawa’iz, p. 267, h. 4897.

101. . Kitab Man la Yahdarhu al-Faqih, vol. 2, p. 625, h. 3214. al-Khisal, p. 570, h. 1. Both narrating from Abu Hamzah al-Thumali (Thabit ibn Dinar).

102. . Qur’an, 66:6.

103. . Qur’an, 26:214.

104. . He was the seventh ancestor of the Prophet (s.a.w.).

105. . He was the sixth ancestor of the Prophet (s.a.w.).

106. . Hashim was the eldest son of ‘Abd Manaf who gained an honourable rank after his father and became the great person of Batha’. He was the second ancestor of the Messenger of Allah.

107. . ‘Abd al-Muttalib was Hashim’s son who had complete respect and authority in his tribe. He was a believer in Monotheism and Resurrection, and that was why he was called the second Abraham. He was the first ancestor of the Prophet (s.a.w.).

108. . Sahih Muslim, vol. 1, p. 192, h. 348. Sunan al-Tirmidhi, vol. 5, p. 338, h. 3185. Sunan al-Nisa’i, vol. 6, p. 248. Kanz al-Ummal, vol. 16, p. 10, h. 43702.

109. . Qur’an, 66:6.

110. . al-Durr al-Manthur, vol. 8, p. 225, narrating from Ibn Mardawayh.

111. . Nahj al-Balaghah, Letter 41. Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 42, p. 182, h. 40.

112. . Qur’an, 66:6.

113. . al-Kafi, vol. 5, p. 62, h. 3.

114. . Qur’an, 66:6.

115. . al-Kafi, vol. 5, p. 62, h. 1. Tahdhib al-Ahkam, vol. 6, p. 179, h. 364. Both narrating from ‘Abd al-A’la Mawla Al Sam. Makarim al-Akhlaq, vol. 1, p. 468, h. 1600.

116. . Qur’an, 66:6.

117. . al-Kafi, vol. 5, p. 62, h. 2. Tahdhib al-Ahkam, vol. 6, p. 179, h. 365. Mishkat al-Anwar, p. 455, h. 1526.

118. . Nahj al-Balaghah, Wise Saying 73. Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 2, p. 56, h. 33.

119. . al-Kafi, vol. 2, p. 78, h. 14 and p. 105, h. 10. al-Usul al-Sittah ‘Ashar, p. 151. All narrating from Ibn Ya’fur. Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 70, p. 303, h. 13.

120. . In al-Khutbah al-Sha’baniyyah it say: “Respect your elders and have mercy on your little children.” al-Amali, by al-Saduq, p. 154.

121. . Tarikh al-Ya’qubi, vol. 2, p. 320. al-Jawharah, p. 52.

122. . Tuhaf al-’Uqul, p. 84, Ghurar al-Hikam, h. 1768. Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 77, p. 212, h. 1, narrating from Kashf al-Mahajjah.

123. . Ghurar al-Hikam, h. 3748. ‘Uyun al-Hikam wa al-Mawa’iz, p. 163, h. 3481.

124. . Sharh Nahj al-Balaghah, vol. 20, p. 333, h. 819.

125. . al-Kafi, vol. 7, p. 260, h. 3. Tahdhib al-Ahkam, vol. 10, p. 148, h. 589. al-Mahasin, vol. 1, p. 427, h. 984. Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 79, p. 102 h. 2.

126. . Ghurar al-Hikam, h. 10529. ‘Uyun al-Hikam wa al-Mawa’iz, p. 531, h. 9654.

127. . al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 50, h. 6. Tahdhib al-Ahkam, vol. 8, p. 113 h. 390. Mustatrafat al-Sara’ir, p. 85, h. 30.

128. . Sahih Muslim, vol. 4, p. 1814, h. 79. Musnad Ibn Hanbal, vol. 9, p. 272, h. 24089. al-Sunan al-Kubra, vol. 10, p. 324, h. 20788.

129. . Sharh Nahj al-Balaghah, vol. 20, p. 278, h. 207.

130. . ‘Uddah al-Da’i, p. 79. Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 104, p. 99, h. 74.

131. . Kitab Man la Yahdarhu al-Faqih, vol. 3, p. 436, h. 4509, narrating from ‘Abdullah ibn Maymun from Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) from his forefathers (a.s.), and h. 4508, where he also narrates ‘the beds of boys are to be separated at the age of six’. Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 104, p. 96, h. 50.

132. . al-Mustadrak ‘ala al-Sahihain, vol. 1, p. 317, h. 721. Sunan al-Darquini, vol. 1, p. 230, h. 1.

133. . al-Kafi, vol. 7, p. 69, h. 8. Tahdhib al-Ahkam, vol. 9, p. 183, h. 738. Both narrating from ‘Isa ibn Zaid from Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.).

134. . al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 47, h. 6, narrating from Ibn al-Qaddah. al-Khisal, p. 439, h. 30, narrating from Ibn al-Qaddah from Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) from his forefathers (a.s.).

135. . al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 503, h. 36, from Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.).

136. . al-Mustadrak ‘ala al-Sahihain, vol. 3, p. 288, h. 5119. al-Isabah, vol. 6, p. 25, h. 7815.

137. . This traditions means that the first one who looks at the private parts of the newborn should not be a woman, because usually the first thing women do is look at the private part to see whether the baby is a boy or a girl, but it is recommended that first one to look at the newborn is a man, and he must look at places other than the private parts. (al-Wafi, vol. 23, p. 1315).

138. . Kitab Man la Yahdarhu al-Faqih, vol. 3, p. 560, h. 4925. al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 17, h. 1. Tahdhib al-Ahkam, vol. 7, p. 436, h. 1737. All narrating from Jabir.

139. . Makarim al-Akhlaq, vol. 1, p. 479, h. 1659. Kitab Man la Yahdarhu al-Faqih, vol. 3, p. 437, h. 4510, from Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.).

140. . al-Kafi, vol. 5, p. 533, h. 2. Tahdhib al-Ahkam, vol. 7, p. 481, h. 1929. Both narrating from Zurarah. Mishkat al-Anwar, p. 353, h. 1143, without ‘free’.

141. . Tahdhib al-Ahkam, vol. 7, p. 461, h. 1846. Wasa’il al-Shi’ah, vol. 14, p. 170, h. 6.

142. . Qur’an, 24:58-59.

143. . al-Sunan al-Kubra, vol. 7, p. 157, h. 13558. al-Durr al-Manthur, vol. 6, p. 220.

144. . Da’a’im al-Islam, vol. 2, p. 202, h. 741, narrating from Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) from his forefathers (a.s.).

145. . al-Kafi, vol. 5, p. 528, h. 3, narrating from Abu Ayyub al-Khazzaz. Mishkat al-Anwar, p. 344, h. 1101.

146. . al-Kafi, vol. 5, p. 529, h. 1, narrating from Jarrah al-Mada’ini. Mishkat al-Anwar, p. 342, h. 1097.

147. . al-Kafi, vol. 5, p. 528, h. 4. Tafsir Nur al-Thaqalayn, vol. 3, p. 586, h. 86.

148. . al-Kafi, vol. 5, p. 500, h. 2, narrating from Husayn ibn Zaid from Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.). ‘Awali al-La’ali, vol. 3, p. 305, h. 111, without ‘and the sound of their breathing’.

149. . al-Ja’fariyat, p. 96. al-Nawadir, by al-Rawandi, p. 120, h. 129. Both narrating from Imam al-Kazim (a.s.) from his forefathers (a.s.).

150. . al-Kafi, vol. 5, p. 499, h. 1, narrating from Ibn Rashid from his father. Tahdhib al-Ahkam, vol. 7, p. 414, h. 1655, narrating from Ibn Rashid from his father.

Part 10

The Ethics of Upbringing

4.1: Encouragement of the Loving of Children and Having Sympathy to Them

325. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “Allah will write a reward for he who kisses his child, and Allah will bring happiness on Judgement Day to he who makes his child happy, and he who teaches his child the Qur’an, his parents will be called upon [in the Hereafter] and they will be clothed with two garments with light which will brighten the faces of the people of Heaven.”1

326. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “If a person makes his crying child so pleased that he becomes silent, Allah will grant that person so much bounties of Heaven until he becomes pleased.”2

327. al-Tabaqat al-Kubra, narrating from Mu’awiyah ibn Qurrah, from his uncle, who said: “He used to visit the Prophet (s.a.w.) along with his son and would make him sit in front of him (s.a.w.). Once, the Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “Do you love him?” The man said: “Yes, very much.”

Later that boy passed away and the Prophet (s.a.w.) told the man: “It seems that you have become sad upon his death, have you not?”

The man said: “Yes, I have, O Messenger of Allah!”

He (s.a.w.) said: “Will you not be happy when Allah admits you in Heaven and you will find your son at one of the doors of Paradise which he will open for you?”

The man answered: “Yes.”

He (s.a.w.) said: “Verily you will be in such a state, by the will of Allah.”3

328. Tarikh Dimashq, narrating from Wathilah ibn al-Asqaa’ who said: “The Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.) went to ‘Uthman ibn Maz’un who had a child with him that he had kissed, and the Prophet (s.a.w.) said to him: “‘Uthman, do you love him?”

He answered: “By Allah, yes I do love him, O Messenger of Allah.”

He (s.a.w.) said: “Do you want me to increase your love for him?”

‘Uthman said: “Yes. May my parents be your ransom!”

He (s.a.w.) said: “Indeed he who makes a child from his generation pleased so that he becomes happy, Allah will make him pleased on Judgment Day until he becomes happy.”4

329. Hilyah al-Awliya, narrating from Anas who said: “A woman went to visit ‘A’ishah along with her two children and ‘A’ishah gave three dates to her and she gave each of her children one date. They ate their own date and then started looking at their mother. She took the [remaining] date and cut it in half and gave half to one child and the second half to the other. The Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.) arrived and ‘A’ishah informed him of the event, and the Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “Why are you surprised from this action? Verily Allah will shower His mercy upon her for the sake of her mercy to her two children.”5

330. Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) said: “Allah will be merciful to His servant for his intense love to his child.”6

331. Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) said: “Musa ibn ‘Imran^7 (a.s.) said: “O Lord! Which act do You consider to be the best?”

Allah Almighty said: “The loving of children, for I have created them with their conviction in My Unity, and if I make them die, I will admit them into Paradise with My mercy.”8

الحَثُّ عَلى حُبِّ الأَوْلادِ وَالشَّفَقَةِ بِهِم‏

325. رسول الله صلى الله عليه وآله: مَن قَبَّلَ وَلَدَهُ كَتَبَ اللهُ عزّ وجلّ لَهُ حَسَنَةً، ومَن فَرَّحَهُ فَرَّحَهُ اللهُ يَومَ القِيامَةِ، ومَن عَلَّمَهُ القُرآنَ دُعِيَ بِالأبَوَينِ فَيُكسَيانِ حُلَّتَينِ يُضي‏ءُ مِن نورِهِما وُجوهُ أهلِ الجَنَّةِ.

326. عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: مَن بَكى صَبِيّ لَهُ فَأرضاهُ حَتّى يُسَكِّنَهُ، أعطاهُ اللهُ عزّ وجلّ مِنَ الجَنَّةِ حَتّى يَرضى.

327. الطبقات الكبرى عن معاوية بن قرّة عن عمّه: أنَّهُ كانَ يَأتي النَّبِيَّ صلى الله عليه وآله بِابنِهِ فَيُجلِسُهُ بَينَ يَدَيهِ. فَقالَ لَهُ النَّبِيُ صلى الله عليه وآله تُحِبُّهُ؟ قالَ: نَعَم، حُبّاً شَديداً. ثُمَّ إنَّ الغُلامَ ماتَ، فَقالَ لَهُ النَّبِيّ صلى الله عليه وآله: كَأَنَّكَ حَزِنتَ عَلَيهِ! قالَ: أجَل يا رسول الله.

قالَ: أفَما يَسُرُّكَ إذا أدخَلَكَ اللهُ الجَنَّةَ أن تَجِدَهُ عَلى بابٍ مِن أبوابِها فَيَفتَحُهُ لَكَ؟ قالَ: بَلى.

قالَ: فَإِنَّهُ كَذلِكَ إن شاءَ اللهُ.

328. تاريخ دمشق عن واثلة بن الأسقع‏ أنَّ رَسولَ الله صلى الله عليه وآله خَرَجَ عَلى عُثمانَ بنِ مَظعونٍ ومَعَهُ صَبِيّ لَهُ صَغيرٌ يَلثِمُهُ، فَقالَ: أتُحِبُّهُ يا عُثمانُ؟!

قالَ: إي وَاللهِ يا رَسولَ اللهِ، إنِّي لَأُحِبُّهُ‏

قالَ: أفَلا أزِيدُكَ لَهُ حُبّاً؟!

قالَ: بَلى، فِداكَ أبي وامِّي‏

قالَ: إنَّهُ مَن تَرَضَّى لَهُ صَغيراً مِن نَسلِهِ حَتّى يَرضى، تَرَضَّاهُ اللهُ يَومَ القِيامَةِ حَتّى يَرضى.

329. حلية الأولياء عن أنس: أنَّ امرَأَةً دَخَلَت عَلى عائِشَةَ ومَعَها صَبِيّانِ لَها، فَأَعطَتها عائِشَةُ ثَلاثَ تَمراتٍ، فَأعطَت كُلَّ صَبِيّ مِنهما تَمرَةً، فَأكَلَ الصَّبِيّانِ تَمرَتَيهِما ثُمَّ نَظَرا إلى أُمِّهِما، فَأَخَذَتِ التَّمرَةَ فَشَقَّتها نِصفَينِ فَأَعطَت ذا نِصفاً وذا نِصفاً.

فَدَخَلَ النَّبِيّ صلى الله عليه وآله فَأَخَبَرَتهُ عائِشَةُ، فَقالَ لَها النَّبِيّ صلى الله عليه وآله: ما أعجَبَكِ مِن ذلِكَ؟ فَإِنَّ اللهَ قَد رَحِمَها بِرَحمَتِها صَبِيَّيها.

330. الإمام الصادق عليه السلام: إنَّ اللهَ لَيَرحَمُ العَبدَ لِشِدَّةِ حُبِّهِ لِوَلَدِهِ.

331. عنه عليه السلام: قالَ موسَى بنُ عِمرانَ عليه السلام: يا رَبِّ، أيُ الأعمالِ أفضَلُ عِندَكَ؟

فَقالَ: حُبُّ الأَطفالِ، فَإِنِّي فَطَرتُهُم عَلى تَوحيدي، فَإِن أَمَتُّهُم أدخَلتُهُم بِرَحمَتِي جَنَّتي.

4.2: The Prophet’s Conduct in Kindness to Children and Dignifying Them

332. Musnad Ibn Hanbal, narrating from Walid ibn ‘Aqabah who said: “When the Prophet of Allah (s.a.w.) conquered Mecca, the people of Mecca came to him with their children and he patted them over their heads and prayed for them.”9

333. Sahih Muslim, narrating from ‘Amr ibn Sa’id from Anas ibn Malik who said: “I never saw someone more affectionate to his family than the Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.). Ibrahim [the Prophet’s son] had a wet-nurse in ‘Awali in Medina and the Prophet (s.a.w.) used to go there and we would accompany him. He entered the house and the wet-nurse who was a servant had burnt incense that gave the house a sweet scent. The Prophet (s.a.w.) would pick Ibrahim up, kiss him and go back home.

‘Amr said: “When Ibrahim passed away, the Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.) said: “Ibrahim was my son, though he died while he was still a suckling infant, but he has two wet-nurses in Heaven who completed his suckling period.”10

334. Sahih Muslim, narrating from ‘Abdullah ibn Ja’far who said: “Whenever the Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.) returned from a journey, he would first visit the children of his family.”11

335. Musnad Ibn Hanbal, narrating from ‘Urwah who said: “When the Prophet of Allah (s.a.w.) returned from a journey, he would be received by the children.”12

336. al-Mahajjah al-Bayda’: “When the Prophet (s.a.w.) returned from a journey and children would meet him, the Prophet (s.a.w.) would stop for their sake and then he would ask them to climb on his back. Some of them climbed from the front of him and others from his back. He (s.a.w.) also ordered his companions to carry the rest of the children. It happened that after this event the children boasted and said to each other: “The Prophet of Allah carried me in his arms and carried you on his back”, and others would say: “He told his companions to put you on their backs.”13

337. al-Manaqib, narrating from Ibn Shahr Ashub, from ‘Abd al-‘Aziz in his chain of narrations from the Prophet (s.a.w.) that: “He (s.a.w.) was sitting down and Hasan and Husayn entered and when he saw them he stood up for them, but they were slow in arriving, so he went towards them to receive them and he carried them on his shoulders, saying: “What a good mount your mount is, and what good riders you are! And your father is better than you.”14

سِيرَةُ النَّبِيّ فِي الشَّفَقَةِ بِالأطفالِ وتَكريمِهِم‏

332. مسند ابن حنبل عن الوليد بن عقبة: لَمّا فَتَحَ رَسولُ اللهِ صلى الله عليه وآله مَكَّةَ، جَعَلَ أهلُ مَكَّةَ يَأتونَهُ بِصِبيانِهِم فَيَمسَحُ عَلى رُؤوسِهِم ويَدعو لَهُم.

333. صحيح مسلم عن عمرو بن سعيد عن أنس: ما رَأيتُ أحَداً كانَ أرحَمَ بِالعِيالِ مِن رَسولِ اللهِ صلى الله عليه وآله، قالَ: كانَ إبراهيمُ مُستَرضَعاً لَهُ في عَوالي المَدينَةِ ، فَكانَ يَنطَلِقُ ونَحنُ مَعَهُ فَيَدخُلُ البَيتَ وإنَّهُ لَيُدَّخَنُ، وكانَ ظِئرُهُ‏ قَيناً ، فَيَأخُذُهُ فَيُقَبِّلُهُ، ثُمَّ يَرجِعُ.

قالَ عَمرٌو: فَلَمّا تُوُفِّيَ إبراهيمُ، قالَ رَسولُ اللهِ صلى الله عليه وآله: إنَّ إبراهيمَ ابني، وإنَّه ماتَ في الثَّدي، وإنَّ لَهُ لَظِئرَينِ تُكمِلانِ رَضاعَهُ فِي الجَنَّةِ.

334. صحيح مسلم عن عبد الله بن جعفر: كانَ رَسولُ اللهِ صلى الله عليه وآله إذا قَدِمَ مِن سَفَرٍ تُلُقِّيَ بِصِبيانِ أهلِ بَيتِهِ.

335. مسند ابن حنبل عن عروة: كانَ [رَسولُ اللهِ صلى الله عليه وآله‏] يُستَقبَلُ بالصِّبيانِ إِذا جاءَ مِن سَفَرٍ.

336. المحجّة البيضاء: كانَ صلى الله عليه وآله يَقدِمُ مِنَ السَّفَرِ فَيَتَلَقّاهُ الصِّبيانُ فَيَقِفُ لَهُم، ثُمَّ يَأمُرُ بِهِم فَيُرفَعونَ إِلَيهِ، فَيَرفَعُ مِنهُم بَينَ يَدَيهِ ومِن خَلفِهِ، ويَأمُرُ أصحابَهُ أن يَحمِلُوا بَعضَهُم، فَرُبَّما يَتَفاخَرُ الصِّبيانُ بَعدَ ذلِكَ فَيَقولُ بَعضُهُم لِبَعضٍ: حَمَلَنِي رَسولُ اللهِ صلى الله عليه وآله بَينَ يَدَيهِ، وحَمَلَكَ أنتَ وَراءَهُ، ويَقولُ بَعضُهُم: أمَرَ أصحابَهُ أن يَحمِلوكَ وَراءَهُم.

337. المناقب لابن شهر آشوب عن عبدالعزيز بإسناده عن النبيّ صلى الله عليه وآله: أنَّه كان جالساً فَأَقبَلَ الحَسَنُ وَالحُسَينُ عليهما السلام فَلَمّا رَآهُمَا النَّبِيّ صلى الله عليه وآله قامَ لَهُما وَاستَبطَأَ بُلوغَهُما إلَيهِ، فَاستَقبَلَهُما وحَمَلَهُما عَلى كَتِفَيهِ وقالَ: نِعمَ المَطِيُّ مَطِيُّكُما، ونِعمَ الرّاكِبانِ أَنتُما، وأبوكُما خَيرٌ مِنكُما.

4.3: Greeting Children

338. Kanz al-Ummal, narrating from Anas who said: “Whenever the Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.) passed children, he would greet them.”15

339. Sunan al-Tirmidhi, narrating from Anas who said: “I was with the Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.) when he passed by some children and he greeted them.”16

340. Makarim al-Akhlaq, narrating from Anas who said: “When the Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.) met a group of children, he would greet them, even while he was in a hurry.”17

341. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “There are five things that I will not leave doing until I die: Eating food on the ground with the servants, riding on a donkey that has a packsaddle, milking a goat with my own hands, wearing woollen clothes, and greeting children so that it becomes a tradition (sunnah) after me.”18

342. Sahih ibn Habban, narrating from Anas who said: “The Prophet of Allah used to visit the Ansar, greet their children and pat their heads.”19

التَّسليمُ عَلَى الصِّبيانِ‏

338. كنز العمّال عن أنس‏ كانَ [صلى الله عليه وآله‏] يَمُرُّ بِالصِّبيانِ فَيُسَلِّمُ عَلَيهِم.

339. سنن الترمذي عن أنس: كُنتُ مَعَ رَسولِ اللهِ صلى الله عليه وآله فَمَرَّ عَلَى صِبيانٍ فَسَلَّمَ عَلَيهِم.

340. مكارم الأخلاق عن أنس: إنَّ رَسولَ اللهِ صلى الله عليه وآله مَرَّ عَلَى صِبيانٍ فَسَلَّمَ عَلَيهِم وهُوَ مُغِذٌّ .

341. رسول الله صلى الله عليه وآله: خَمسٌ لا أدَعُهُنَّ حَتَّى المَماتِ: الأكلُ عَلَى الحَضيضِ‏ مَعَ العَبيدِ، ورُكوبِيَ الحِمارَ مُؤَكَّفاً ، وحَلبُ العَنزِ بِيَدي، ولُبسُ الصّوفِ، وَالتَّسليمُ عَلَى الصِّبيانِ؛ لِتَكونَ سُنَّةً مِن بَعدِي.

342. صحيح ابن حبان عن أنس: أنَّ النبيَّ صلى الله عليه وآله: كانَ يَزورُ الأنصارَ ويُسَلِّمُ عَلى صِبيانِهِم ويَمسَحُ رُؤوسَهُم.

4.4: Reproaching the Disliking of Children

343. Sahih Muslim, narrating from ‘A’ishah who said: “A group of Bedouins came to the Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.) and said: “Do you [Muslims] kiss your children?”

They [the Muslims] said: “Yes.”

Then the Bedouins said: “By Allah! We do not kiss them.”

The Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.) said: “What can I do if Allah has taken mercy away from your hearts?”20

344. al-Adab al-Mufrad, narrating from Abu Hurayrah who said: “At the time when al-Aqra’ ibn Habis al-Tamimi was sitting at the presence of the Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.), the Prophet kissed Hasan ibn ‘Ali al-Aqra’ said: “I have ten children, none of whom I have ever kissed.”

The Prophet of Allah (s.a.w.) cast a glance at him and then said: “He who does not show compassion will not see compassion.”21

345. Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) said: “A man once came to the Prophet (s.a.w.) and said: “I have never kissed a child.” When he left, the Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.) said: “This is someone who, in my view, is one of the people of Hell.”22

ذَمُّ عَدَمِ المَحَبَّةِ لِلأَطفالِ‏

343. صحيح مسلم عن عائشة: قَدِمَ ناسٌ مِنَ الأعرابِ عَلى رَسولِ اللهِ صلى الله عليه وآله فَقالوا: أتُقَبِّلونَ صِبيانَكُم؟ فَقالوا: نَعَم، فَقالوا: لكِنَّا وَاللهِ ما نُقَبِّلُ.

فَقالَ رَسولُ اللهِ صلى الله عليه وآله: وأملِكُ إن كانَ اللهُ نَزَعَ مِنكُمُ الرَّحمَةَ!

344. الأدب المفرد عن أبي هريرة: قَبَّلَ رَسولُ اللهِ صلى الله عليه وآله حَسَنَ بنَ عَلِيّ عليه السلام، وعِندَهُ الأَقرَعُ بنُ حابِسٍ التَّميميّ جالِسٌ.

فَقالَ الأَقرَعُ: إنَّ لي عَشَرَةً مِنَ الوُلدِ ما قَبَّلتُ مِنهُم أحَداً!

فَنَظَرَ إلَيهِ رَسولُ اللهِ صلى الله عليه وآله ثُمَّ قَالَ: مَن لا يَرحَم لا يُرحَمُ.

345. الإمام الصادق عليه السلام: جاءَ رَجُلٌ إلَى النَّبِيّ صلى الله عليه وآله فَقالَ: ما قَبَّلتُ صَبِيّاً قَطُّ. فَلَمّا وَلّى قالَ رَسولُ اللهِ صلى الله عليه وآله: هذا رَجُلٌ عِندِي أنَّهُ مِن أهلِ النّارِ.

4.5: The Boundaries of Love to Children

“O you who believe! Let not your wealth, or your children, divert you from the remembrance of Allah; and whoever does that, these are the losers.”23

“O you who believe! Surely from your wives and your children there is an enemy to you; therefore beware of them; and if you pardon and forbear and forgive, then surely Allah is Forgiving, Merciful.”24

346. The Prophet of Allah (s.a.w.) said, while giving advice to ‘Abdullah ibn Mas’ud: “O Ibn Mas’ud! Your sympathy to your family and children should not drive you to disobedience [to Allah] and to unlawful things, for Allah the Exalted says in regards to Judgment Day: “The Day whereon neither wealth nor sons will avail, ‘Except for him who comes to Allah with a safe heart.”25 26

347. Sunan al-Tirmidhi, narrating from Ibn ‘Abbas that a person had once asked him about the verse: “O you who believe! Surely from your wives and your children there is an enemy to you; therefore beware of them; …”27

He answered: “There were some people from Mecca who had embraced Islam and they wanted to go to the Prophet (s.a.w.), but their wives and children did not let them leave to visit him (s.a.w.). When they finally did come to meet the Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.), they saw that people had become knowledgeable in religion and they wanted to punish them, but Allah sent down the verse: “O you who believe! Surely from your wives and your children there is an enemy to you; therefore beware of them; ….”28

348. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said, to one of his companions: “Do not let your wife and children become your entire concern, for if your wife and children are the friends (awliya’) of Allah, He will not neglect the life of His friends, and if they are the enemies of Allah why should you be concerned and preoccupied with the enemies of Allah?”29

349. Mustadrak al-Wasail: “It is said that when Imam ‘Ali’s two children ‘Abbas and Zainab were infants, the Imam had said to ‘Abbas: “Say one.” He said: “One.” He (a.s.) said: “Say two.” He said: “I feel shy to say two with the tongue I have used to say ‘one’.” Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) kissed him on his eyes and then turned to Zainab who was standing on his left side and ‘Abbas was on his right.

Zainab said: “Dear father! Do you love us?”

He said: “Yes, my child! Our children are our livers.”

She said: “O father! Two loves cannot exist in a believer’s heart: the love of Allah and the love of children, and if it is a must, then let it be that sympathy is for us and pure love is for Allah.” After this, ‘Ali’s love for them increased.30

350. Mustadrak al-Wasail, narrating that ‘Ali ibn Abu Talib (a.s.) had a son and a daughter and he once kissed his son in front of his daughter. The daughter said: “O father! Do you love him?” He (a.s.) said: “Yes.” She said: I thought you love none but Allah.” He wept and then said: “Love is for Allah and compassion is for children.”31

351. Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) said: “My father (a.s.) said: “By Allah! I act with one of my children and make him sit on my knees, show him much affection and thank him a lot, even though my other child is right; but I do so for the sake of protecting him from that child and from others, so that they might not do the same thing against him as the brothers of Yusuf (a.s.) done to him. Allah did not send down the Chapter of Yusuf other than to be an example so that some of us do not feel envy towards others as Yusuf’s brothers envied and wronged him.”32

نِطاقُ المَحَبَّةِ بِالأَولادِ

(يا أَيُّهَا الَّذِينَ آمَنُوا لا تُلْهِكُمْ أَمْوالُكُمْ وَ لا أَوْلادُكُمْ عَنْ ذِكْرِ اللَّهِ وَ مَنْ يَفْعَلْ ذلِكَ فَأُولئِكَ هُمُ الْخاسِرُونَ).

(يا أَيُّهَا الَّذِينَ آمَنُوا إِنَّ مِنْ أَزْواجِكُمْ وَ أَوْلادِكُمْ عَدُوًّا لَكُمْ فَاحْذَرُوهُمْ وَ إِنْ تَعْفُوا وَ تَصْفَحُوا وَ تَغْفِرُوا فَإِنَّ اللَّهَ غَفُورٌ رَحِيمٌ).

346. رسول الله صلى الله عليه وآله- في مَوعِظَتِهِ لِابنِ مَسعودٍ- يَا بنَ مَسعودٍ، لا تَحمِلَنَّكَ الشَّفَقَةُ عَلى أهلِكَ ووُلدِكَ عَلَى الدُّخولِ فِي المَعاصِي وَالحَرامِ، فَإِنَّ اللهَ تَعالى يَقولُ: (يَوْمَ لا يَنْفَعُ مالٌ وَ لا بَنُونَ* إِلَّا مَنْ أَتَى اللَّهَ بِقَلْبٍ سَلِيمٍ) .

347. سنن الترمذي عن ابن عبّاس- لمّا سَألَهُ رَجُلٌ عَن هذهِ الآيةِ: (يا أَيُّهَا الَّذِينَ آمَنُوا إِنَّ مِنْ أَزْواجِكُمْ وَ أَوْلادِكُمْ عَدُوًّا لَكُمْ فَاحْذَرُوهُمْ)- هؤُلاءِ رِجالٌ أسلَموا مِن أهلِ مَكَّةَ وأرادوا أن يَأتُوا النَّبِيّ صلى الله عليه وآله، فَأَبى أزواجُهُم وأولادُهُم أن يَدَعوهُم أن يَأتوا رَسولَ الله صلى الله عليه وآله، فَلَمّا أتَوا رَسولَ الله صلى الله عليه وآله رَأَوا النّاسَ قَد فَقِهوا فِي الدِّينِ هَمّوا أن‏ يُعاقِبوهُم، فَأنزَلَ اللهُ عزّ وجلّ: (يا أَيُّهَا الَّذِينَ آمَنُوا إِنَّ مِنْ أَزْواجِكُمْ وَ أَوْلادِكُمْ عَدُوًّا لَكُمْ فَاحْذَرُوهُمْ).

348. الإمام عليّ عليه السلام- لِبَعضِ أصحابِهِ- لا تَجعَلَنَّ أكثَرَ شُغلِكَ بِأهلِكَ ووَلَدِكَ، فَإِن يَكُن أهلُكَ ووَلَدُكَ أولِياءَ اللهِ فَإِنَّ اللهَ لا يُضيعُ أولِياءَهُ، وإن يَكونوا أعداءَ اللهِ فَمَا هَمُّكَ وشُغلُكَ بِأعداءِ اللهِ!

349. مستدرك الوسائل: قيلَ: لَما كانَ العَبّاسُ وزَينَبُ وَلَدَي عَلِيّ عليه السلام صَغيرَينِ، قالَ عَلِيٌّ لِلعَبّاسِ: قُل: واحِدٌ، فَقال: واحِدٌ، فَقالَ: قُل: اثنانِ، قالَ: أستَحي أن أقولَ بِاللِّسانِ الّذي قُلتُ واحِدٌ: اثنانِ. فَقَبَّلَ عَلِيٌ عليه السلام عَينَيهِ، ثُمَّ التَفَتَ إلى زَينَبَ وكانَت عَلى يَسارِهِ وَالعبَّاسُ عَن يَمينِهِ، فَقالَت: يا أَبَتاهُ أتُحِبُّنا؟ قالَ: نَعَم يا بُنيَ، أولادُنا أكبادُنا.

فَقالَت: يا أبَتاهُ، حُبَّانِ لا يَجتَمِعانِ في قَلبِ المُؤمِنِ، حُبُّ اللهِ وحُبُّ الأولادِ، وإن كانَ لابُدَّ لَنا فَالشَّفَقَةُ لَنا وَالحُبُّ للهِ خالِصاً.

فَازدادَ عَلِيٌّ عليه السلام بِهِما حُبَّاً.

350. مستدرك الوسائل: كانَ لِعَلِيّ بنِ أبي طالِبٍ عليه السلام ابنٌ وبِنتٌ، فَقَبَّلَ الابنَ بَينَ يَدَي البِنتِ، فَقالَت: أتُحِبُّهُ يا أبَه؟ قالَ: بَلى، قالَت: ظَنَنتُ أنَّكَ لا تُحِبُّ أحَداً مِن دونِ اللهِ. فَبَكى، ثُمَّ قالَ: الحُبُّ للهِ، وَالشَّفَقَةُ لِلأولادِ.

351. الإمام الصادق عليه السلام: قالَ والِدي عليه السلام: وَاللهِ إنِّي لَاصانِعُ بَعضَ وُلدِي واجلِسُهُ عَلى فَخِذِي واكثِرُ لَهُ المَحَبَّةَ، واكثِرُ لَهُ الشُّكرَ، وإنَّ الحَقَّ لِغَيرِهِ مِن وُلدِي، ولكِن مُحافَظَةً عَلَيهِ مِنهُ ومِن غَيرِهِ؛ لِئَلّا يَصنَعوا بِهِ ما فَعَلَ بِيوسُفَ‏ إخوَتُهُ، وما أنزَلَ اللهُ سورَةَ يوسُفَ إلّا أمثالًا لِكَيلا يَحسُدَ بَعضُنا بَعضاً كَما حَسَدَ بيوسُفَ‏ إخوَتُهُ وبَغَوا عَلَيهِ.

4.6: Justice Between Children

352. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “Observe equality between your children when giving gifts, and if I was to give preference to anyone, I would give preference to the women.”33

353. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “Be just between your children when giving something.”34

354. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “Be just between your children when granting things to them in the same manner that you would like them to be just with you in obedience and kindness.”35

355. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “Allah the Exalted likes for you to be equal between your children, even when kissing them.”36

356. al-‘Ayal, narrating from al-Hasan^37 who said: “The Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.) was once speaking with his companions when a child entered and went to a corner of the mosque to his father. The father pat his son’s head and sat him on his right knee. After a while, his daughter entered and went towards him, and he pat her on her head and made her sit on the ground.”

The Prophet of Allah (s.a.w.) said: “Why didn’t you seat her on your other knee?”

Then the man seated her on his other knee, and the Prophet of Allah (s.a.w.) said: “Now you have done justice.”38

357. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said: “The Prophet once saw a man who had two children and he kissed one of them and left the other. [At this time] the Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.) said to him: “Should you not treat them equally?”39

358. Sahih Bukhari, narrating from Nu’man ibn Bashir who said: “My father gave me a gift, but [my mother] ÝAmarah bint RawÁÎah said: “I will not be pleased until you make the Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.) witness this.”

Therefore, he went to the Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.) and said: “O Messenger of Allah! I gave a gift to my son who is from ‘Amarah bint Rawahah and she has told me to take you as a witness.”

He (s.a.w.) said: “Have you given a similar gift to your other children?”

He said: “No.” So, the Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “Have fear in Allah and do justice between your children.”

Then he returned and took back his gift.”40

359. Sharh al-Nahj al-Balaghah: “Hasan (a.s.) was the eldest child of ‘Ali (a.s.) and he was noble, gracious, patient and an eloquent speaker, and the Prophet of Allah (s.a.w.) loved him. One day the Prophet (s.a.w.) made a competition between Hasan (a.s.) and Husayn (a.s.) and Hasan won, so the Prophet (s.a.w.) seated him on his right knee and seated Husayn on his left knee.”41

العَدلُ بَينَ الأَولادِ

352. رسول الله صلى الله عليه وآله: سَوّوا بَينَ أولادِكُم فِي العَطِيَّةِ، فَلَو كُنتُ مُفَضِّلًا أحَداً لَفَضَّلتُ النِّساءَ.

353. عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: اعدِلُوا بَينَ أولادِكُم فِي العَطِيَّةِ.

354. عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: اعدِلُوا بَينَ أولادِكُم في النُّحلِ، كَما تُحِبُّونَ أن يَعدِلوا بَينَكُم فِي البِرِّ وَاللُّطفِ.

355. عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: إنَّ اللهَ تَعالى يُحِبُّ أن تَعدِلوا بَينَ أولادِكُم حَتّى فِي القُبَلِ.

356. العيال عن الحسن: بَينا رَسولُ اللهِ صلى الله عليه وآله يُحَدِّثُ أصحابَهُ إذ جاءَ صَبِيّ حَتَّى انتَهى إلى أبيهِ في ناحِيَةِ القَومِ، فَمَسَحَ رَأسَهُ وأقعَدَهُ عَلى فَخِذِهِ اليُمنى. قالَ: فَلَبِثَ قَليلًا فَجاءَت ابنَةٌ لَهُ حَتَّى انتَهَت إلَيهِ، فَمَسَحَ رَأسَها وأقعَدَها فِي الأرضِ. فَقالَ رَسولُ اللهِ صلى الله عليه وآله: فَهَلّا عَلى فَخِذِكَ الاخرى، فَحَمَلَها عَلى فَخِذِهِ الاخرى، فَقالَ صلى الله عليه وآله: الآنَ عَدَلتَ‏ .

357. الإمام عليّ عليه السلام: إنَّ النَّبِيَ صلى الله عليه وآله أبصَرَ رَجُلًا لَهُ وَلَدانِ‏ فَقَبَّلَ أحَدَهُما وتَرَكَ الآخَرَ. فَقالَ رَسولُ اللهِ صلى الله عليه وآله: فَهَلّا واسَيتَ بَينَهُما.

358. صحيح البخاري عن النعمان بن بشير: أعطاني أبي عَطِيَّةً، فَقالَت عَمَرَةُ بِنتُ رَواحَةَ: لا أرضى حَتّى تُشهِدَ رَسولَ اللهِ صلى الله عليه وآله.

فأتى رَسولَ اللهِ صلى الله عليه وآله فَقالَ: إنِّي أعطَيتُ ابني مِن عَمَرَةَ بِنتِ رَواحَةَ عَطِيَّةً فَأمَرَتني أن اشهِدَكَ يا رَسولَ اللهِ.

قالَ: أعطَيتَ سائِرَ وُلدِكَ مِثلَ هذا؟ قالَ: لا.

قالَ: فَاتَّقُوا اللهَ وَاعدِلوا بَينَ أولادِكُم. قالَ: فَرَجَعَ فَرَدَّ عَطِيَّتَهُ.

359. شرح نهج البلاغة: كانَ الحَسَنُ عليه السلام أكبَرَ وُلدِ عَلِيٍّ، وكانَ سَيِّدا سَخِيّا حَليما خَطيبا، وكانَ رَسولُ الله صلى الله عليه وآله يُحِبُّهُ، سابَقَ يَوما بَينَ الحُسَينِ وبَينَهُ فَسَبَقَ الحَسَنُ، فَأجلَسَهُ عَلى فَخِذِهِ اليُمنى، ثُمَّ أجلَسَ الحُسَينَ عَلَى الفَخِذِ اليُسرى.

Being Just Between Children
One of the important discussions in raising children is the administration of justice by parents among their children in being affectionate to them and in giving material resources to them. This issue can be analysed from both a jurisprudential view and from an upbringing perspective.42

The issue that is focused on here is the applying of fairness between children from the second point of view.

Administering justice among children can have certain important upbringing effects that can be mentioned as follows:

1- The children in accordance will themselves do good to their parents and observe their rights.

2- They will not be unjust to their own children.

3- Being just between children will prevent them from envy and taking vengeance on each other.

4- More importantly, the child will be brought up from the very beginning of his life with the spirit of being fair and the just behaviour of the family will provide a ground for social justice.

Injustice and discriminatory treatment of the children not only deprives the parents from their love, but it also endangers the future of the children. This is why scholars of education and upbringing in the present era have considered the observing of justice in treating children necessary for the upbringing of virtuous people.

Islam emphasized on this matter fourteen centuries ago and the Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.) used to order the Muslims to observe justice not only in granting material things [like gifts] but also even in kissing their children.

It is evident that fair behaviour does not mean equal and similar treatment. In many times it happens that observing justice requires that the father interacts more with some of his children because of the differences in their talents or due a sickness, or other issues. This is not considered as injustice, and in these cases he must explain the reasons for his treatment.

When the father feels that observing the rights of one of the children will bring about some negative or dangerous consequences, he should stop it, as Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) says:

“My father (a.s.) said: “By Allah! I act with one of my children and make him sit on my knees, show him much affection and thank him a lot, even though my other child is right; but I do so for the sake of protecting him from that child and from others, so that they might not do the same thing against him as the brothers of Yusuf (a.s.) done to him. Allah did not send down the Chapter of Yusuf other than to be an example so that some of us do not feel envy towards others as Yusuf’s brothers envied and wronged him.”43

As mentioned in this tradition, Imam al-Baqir (a.s.) in order to prevent the envy of some of his children to each other and its evil results not only showed affection to the child whom he must be affectionate more to than the others, but he also showed affection to the other child who was jealous, and in this way he protects the favoured child from the danger of his brother’s jealousy. This is an important lesson for the upbringers, especially for the fathers and mothers.

4.7: Fulfilling a Promise

360. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “Love children, be kind to them, and whenever you promise something to them, fulfil it, for they do not know other than thinking that their sustenance is from you.”44

361. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “If any of you promises his child, he should fulfil it.”45

362. al-Sunan al-Kubra, narrating from ‘Abdullah ibn ‘Amir ibn Rabi’ah who said: “The Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.) came to our house while I was a little child. I went to out play and my mother told me: “O ‘Abdullah! Come in so I can give you something.”

The Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.) asked her: “What do you want to give him?”

She answered: “I want to give him some dates.”

He (s.a.w.) said: “Beware that if you do not do so, it will be written for you as a lie.”46

363. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said: “Telling a lie is improper, whether being a joke or serious. It is also wrong when one of you promises his child and does not fulfil it, for lying leads to debauchery.”47

363. Imam al-Kazim (a.s.) said: “When you promise children you must fulfil it for them, for they think it is you that gives them sustenance. Indeed Allah does not get angry for anything the way He gets angry for the sake of women and children.”48

الوَفاءُ بِالوَعدِ

360. رسول الله صلى الله عليه وآله: أحِبُّوا الصِّبيانَ وَارحَموهُم، وإذا وَعَدتُموهُم شَيئاً فَفوا لَهُم؛ فَإِنَّهُم لا يَدرونَ إلّا أنَّكُم تَرزُقونَهُم.

361. عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: إذا واعَدَ أحَدُكُم صَبِيَّهُ فَليُنجِز.

362. السنن الكبرى عن عبدالله بن عامر بن ربيعة: جاءَ رَسولُ الله صلى الله عليه وآله بَيتَنا وأنا صَبِيٌ صَغيرٌ، فَذَهَبتُ ألعَبُ، فَقالَت لي أُمِّي: يا عَبدَ اللهِ تَعالَ أُعطيكَ.

فَقالَ رَسولُ اللهِ صلى الله عليه وآله: ما أَرَدتِ أن تُعطِيَهُ؟ قَالَت: أرَدتُ أن أُعطِيَهُ تَمرا، قالَ: أما إنَّكِ لَو لَم تَفعَلي لَكُتِبَت عَلَيكِ كِذبَةٌ.

363. الإمام عليّ عليه السلام: لا يَصلُحُ مِن الكَذِبِ جِدٌّ و لا هَزلٌ، ولا أن يَعِدَ أَحَدُكُم صَبِيَّهُ ثُمَّ لا يَفي لَهُ، إنَّ الكَذِبَ يَهدي إلَى الفُجورِ.

364. الإمام الكاظم عليه السلام: إذا وَعَدتُم الصِّبيانَ فَفوا لَهُم؛ فَإِنَّهُم يَرَونَ أنَّكُم الّذينَ تَرزُقونَهُم، إنَّ اللهَ لَيسَ يَغضَبُ لِشَي‏ءٍ كَغَضَبِهِ لِلنِّساءِ وَالصِّبيانِ.

Fulfilling Promises and its Function in the Upbringing of Children

When a child becomes aware and starts to understand things, he is given promises made by his parents, and some of them are fulfilled and some are not. Islam has given significance to the fulfilment of promises and highly emphasises on it. The reason for this emphasis can be analysed and explained in the following:

The moral aspect of the matter, in that all concur that breaching a promise is a bad moral characteristic, and this goes for everyone including children.

Another aspect is it sets a bad example for the child. Breaching a promise is forbidden in general, but in regards to children, because of their age and special upbringing circumstances, it is of a more particular importance. A child takes examples from the behaviour of others, his parents in particular, and since taking example is done in the childhood age, it has a deeper and longer lasting effect on the child’s personality in a way that correcting any mistake will be impossible or very difficult.

A third aspect is the negative effects it will have on the child’s future relation with Allah. Some researches have shown that the child’s relation with Allah is influenced by the parents’ relationship with their child. Before a child becomes familiar with the concept of Allah, he considers his parents, especially the father, as his master and person of authority. In other words, he believes the parent carries the role of lordship for him, and this is why a child considers his parents always correct and faultless and that they possess all perfections and virtues. A child does not even imagine that they may have a slight defect or deficiency. Now, if the parents do not fulfil the promises that they have given to their child, he will relate this breach of promise to the concept of lordship and in the future this will subconsciously have a negative effect on his relation with Allah.

The expression in the following tradition gives testimony to this: “They think that their sustenance is from you.”

The concept which a child understands about Allah is His attribute of ‘giving sustenance’, and in a child’s view, giving sustenance is equal to His Lordship. So, if he sees a breach of a promise by the lord of his childhood period, he will be always pessimistic towards the Lord Almighty and His position. An Islamic tradition says: “Heaven under the feet of mothers.” can be relatively considered connected to this. This means that besides the efforts that mothers make for the religious upbringing of a child, the form of the mother’s communication with the child has an important effect in the formation of the child’s outlook to Allah Almighty and this can be effective on the child’s future in this regard.

4.8: Bringing Happiness

365. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “There is a house in Heaven which is called [the house of] happiness and no one will enter it except he who brings happiness to children.”49

366. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “Buy meat for your children, and remind them of Friday.”50

367. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “There is a house in Heaven which is called [the house of] happiness and no one will enter it except he who brings happiness to the orphans of the believers.”51

368. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “He who adopts an orphan until he becomes self-sufficient will be granted from Allah Heaven by necessity, and in the same way He has made Hellfire incumbent for the consumer of the wealth of an orphan.”52

369. al-Kafi, narrating from Habib ibn Abu Thabit who said: “Some honey and figs were brought for the Commander of the faithful (a.s.) from Hamadan and Hulwan,53 and he (a.s.) asked the chiefs of the tribes to bring all their orphans. He then gave them the brim of the sacs of honey to lick and he divided the containers of honey one by one between the people. He was asked: “O Commander of the faithful! Why do they lick the honey?”

He answered: The leader is the father of the orphans, and I made them lick the honey in the [absent] position of their fathers.”54

370. Rabi’ al-Abrar, narrating from Abu Tufayl who said: “I saw ‘Ali (a.s.) calling the orphans and making them eat honey to the extent that one of his companions said: “I wish I was an orphan.”55

371. al-Manaqib, narrating from Ibn Shahr Ashub who said: “‘Ali (a.s.) saw a woman who was carrying a water-skin full of water on her shoulder, so he took the water-skin from her and took it to her house. He then asked her about their life [She did not know who he was].

The woman said: “‘Ali ibn Abu Talib sent my husband to one of the borders and he was killed and left these orphaned children for me; and I have nothing, so my neediness made me work as a servant for people.”

‘Ali (a.s.) returned and slept uneasily that night, and when he woke up in the morning, he carried a basket of food. A person said to him: “Let me carry it for you!” He said: “Who will carry my burden for me on the Judgment Day?”

Then he went to the woman’s house and knocked on the door. The woman said: “Who is it?”

He (a.s.) said: “I am the same servant who carried your water- skin yesterday. Open the door as I have brought some things for the children.”

The woman said: “May Allah be pleased with you and may He judge between me and ‘Ali ibn Abu Talib.”

Then ‘Ali (a.s.) entered the house and said: “I would indeed like to obtain reward, so would you knead and bake bread, or would you entertain the children so that I could bake the bread?”

The woman said: “I am better and more capable in baking bread, so you be with the children and entertain them until I finish baking bread.”

The woman took the flour and kneaded it while ‘Ali (a.s.) picked up the meat and cooked it, and in the meantime, he made morsels from dates, meat, and other food stuffs and fed it to the children. Whenever each of the children ate something, he would say to them: “My dear child! Forgive ‘Ali ibn Abu Talib for what he has done to you!”

When the woman kneaded the flour, she said: “O servant of Allah! Kindle the oven!”

‘Ali (a.s.) hastened to kindle the oven, and when he lit it and the heat struck his face, he ceaselessly said: “O ‘Ali! Taste! This is the retribution of the one who leaves widows and orphans alone.”

Another woman who knew ‘Ali (a.s.) came and saw him and she said to the mother: “Woe unto you! This is the Commander of the faithful.”

The woman came to him in a confused state and said: “O Commander of the faithful! Shame on me!”

‘Ali (a.s.) said: “O servant of Allah! But it is me who should be ashamed for neglecting your affairs and needs.”56

372. Kashf al-Yaqin: “It is narrated that one night ‘Ali (a.s.) met a poor woman who had some little children who were crying from hunger. The woman was keeping them occupied to make them sleep by lighting a fire under a pot which only contained some water so the children would think that there was food in it and she was cooking it for them.

The Commander of the faithful (a.s.) became aware of her condition and went to her house with Qanbar. He (a.s.) took along with him a basket of dates, a bag of flour, some fat, rice and bread, and he carried them on his holy shoulder. Qanbar wanted to carry them but he did not let him.

When he reached the woman’s house, he asked permission to enter and she gave him permission. He then poured some rice and fat in a pot to cook, and when it was cooked he gave it to the children and told them to eat.

When they became full, he started to roam around the house and bleating for them and they were laughing.

As soon as he and Qanbar left the house, Qanbar told him: “O master! I saw some odd things tonight. I understood the cause of some of them, like carrying the provisions for earning reward, but I did not understand the reason for you going around the house and bleating.”

He (a.s.) said: “O Qanbar! I went to these children while they were crying out of severe hunger and I wanted to leave them while they were full and laughing and I did not find any way [for making them laugh] other than by what I did.”57

إدخالُ السُّرورِ

365. رسول الله صلى الله عليه وآله: إنَّ فِي الجَنَّةِ داراً يُقالُ لَهَا: الفَرَحُ، لا يَدخُلُها إلّا مَن فَرَّحَ الصِّبيانَ.

366. عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: اشتَروا لِصِبيانِكُمُ اللَّحمَ، وذَكِّروهُم يَومَ الجُمُعَةِ.

367. عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: إنّ فِي الجَنَّةِ داراً يُقالُ لَها: دارُ الفَرَحِ، لايَدخُلُها إلّا مَن فَرَّحَ يَتامَى المُؤمِنينَ.

368. عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: مَن عالَ يَتيماً حَتّى يَستَغنِيَ، أوجَبَ اللهُ عزّ وجلّ لَهُ بِذلِكَ الجَنَّةَ، كَما أوجَبَ لِاآكِلِ مالِ اليَتيمِ النّارَ .

369. الكافي عن حبيب بن أبي ثابت: جاءَ إلى أميرِ المُؤمِنينَ عليه السلام عَسَلٌ وتينٌ مِن هَمَدانَ وحُلوانَ‏ ، فَأَمَرَ العُرَفاءَ أن يَأتوا بِاليَتامى، فَأَمكَنَهُم مِن رُؤوسِ الأَزقاقِ‏ يَلعَقُونَها، وهُوَ يُقَسِّمُها لِلنّاسِ قَدَحاً قَدَحاً، فَقيلَ لَهُ: يا أميرَ المُؤمِنينَ، ما لَهُم يَ فَقالَ: إنَّ الإمامَ أبُو اليَتامى، وإنَّما ألعَقتُهُم هذا بِرِعايَةِ الآباءِ.

370. ربيع الأبرار عن أبي الطفيل: رَأَيتُ عَلِيّاً عليه السلام يَدعُو اليَتامى فَيُطعِمُهُمُ العَسَلَ، حَتّى قالَ بَعضُ أصحابِهِ: لَودِدتُ أنّي كُنتُ يَتيما.

371. المناقب لابن شهر آشوب: نَظَرَ عَلِيٌّ إلَى امرَأَةٍ عَلى كَتِفِها قِربَةُ ماءٍ، فَأَخَذَ مِنهَا القِربَةَ فَحَمَلَها إلى مَوضِعِها، وسَأَلَها عَن حالِها، فَقالَت: بَعثَ عَلِيُّ بنُ أبي طالِبٍ صاحِبي إلى بَعضِ الثُّغورِ فَقُتِلَ، وتَرَكَ عَلَيَّ صِبياناً يَتامى، ولَيسَ عِندي شَي‏ءٌ، فَقَد ألجَأَتنِي الضَّرورَةُ إلى خِدمَةِ النّاسِ.

فَانصَرَفَ وباتَ لَيلَتَهُ قَلِقاً. فَلَمّا أصبَحَ حَمَلَ زِنبيلًا فيه طَعامٌ، فَقالَ بَعضُهُم: أعطِني أحمِلُهُ عَنكَ، فَقالَ: مَن يَحمِلُ وِزري عَنّي يَومَ القِيامَةِ؟! فَأَتى وقَرَعَ البابَ، فَقالَت: مَن هذا؟

قالَ: أنا ذلِكَ العَبدُ الَّذي حَمَلَ مَعكِ القِربَةَ، فَافتَحي فَإِنَّ مَعي شَيئاً لِلصِّبيانِ.

فَقالَت: رَضِيَ اللهُ عَنكَ وحَكَمَ بَيني وبينَ عَلِيِّ بنِ أبي طالِبٍ!

فَدَخَلَ وقالَ: إنّي أحبَبتُ اكتِسابَ الثَّوابِ، فَاختاري بَينَ أن تَعجِنينَ‏ وتَخبِزينَ، وبَينَ أن تُعَلِّلينَ‏ الصِّبيانَ لأَخبِزَ أنا.لعَقونَها؟

فَقالَت: أنا بِالخَبزِ أبصَرُ وعَلَيهِ أقدَرُ، ولكِن شَأنَكَ وَالصِّبيانَ فَعَلِّلهُم حَتّى أَفرُغَ مِنَ الخَبزِ.

فَعَمَدَت إلَى الدَّقيقِ فَعَجَنَتهُ، وعَمَدَ عَلِيٌّ عليه السلام إلَى اللَّحمِ فَطَبَخَهُ، وجَعَلَ يُلقِمُ الصِّبيانَ مِن اللَّحمِ وَالتَّمرِ وغَيرِهِ، فَكُلَّما ناوَلَ الصِّبيانَ مِن ذلِكَ شَيئاً قالَ لَهُ: يا بُنَيَّ، اجعَل عَلِيَّ بنَ أبي طالِبٍ في حِلٍّ مِمّا مَرَّ في أمرِكَ.

فَلَمَّا اختَمَرَ العَجينُ قالَت: يا عَبدَ اللهِ، سَجِّرِ التَّنّورَ . فَبادَرَ لِسَجرِهِ، فَلَمّا أشعَلَهُ ولَفَحَ في وَجهِهِ جَعَلَ يَقولُ: ذُق يا عَلِيُّ! هذا جَزاءُ مَن ضَيَّعَ الأَرامِلَ وَاليَتامى.

فَرَأتهُ امرَأةٌ تَعرِفُهُ، فَقالَت: وَيحَكِ! هذا أميرُ المُؤمِنينَ. قالَ: فَبادَرَتِ المَرأةُ وهِيَ تَقولُ: وا حَيايَ مِنكَ يا أميرَ المُؤمِنينَ!

فَقالَ: بَل وا حَيايَ مِنكِ يا أمَةَ اللهِ فيما قَصَّرتُ في أمرِكِ!

372. كشف اليقين: رُوِيَ أنَّهُ [عَلِيّاً عليه السلام‏] اجتازَ لَيلَةً عَلَى امرَأَةٍ مِسكينَةٍ لَها أطفالٌ صِغارٌ يَبكونَ مِنَ الجوعِ، وهِيَ تُشاغِلُهُم وتُلهيهِم حَتّى يَناموا، وكانَت قَد أشعَلَت ناراً تَحتَ قِدرٍ فيها ماءٌ لا غَيرَ، وأوهَمَتهُم أنَّ فيها طَعاماً تَطبُخُهُ لَهُم.

فَعَرَفَ أميرُ المُؤمِنينَ عليه السلام حالَها، فَمَشى عليه السلام ومَعهُ قَنبَرٌ إلى مَنزِلِهِ، فَأَخرَجَ قَوصَرَّةَ تَمرٍ وجِرابَ‏ دَقيقٍ وشَيئاً مِنَ الشَّحمِ وَالأَرُزِّ وَالخُبزِ، وحَمَلَهُ عَلى كَتِفِهِ الشَّريفِ، فَطَلَبَ قَنبَرٌ حَملَهُ، فَلَم يَفعَل. فَلَمّا وَصَل إلى بابِ المَرأَةِ استَأذَنَ عَلَيها، فَأَذِنَت لَهُ فِي الدُّخولِ.

فَأَرمى شَيئاً مِنَ الأَرُزِّ فِي القِدرِ ومَعَهُ شَي‏ءٌ مِنَ الشَّحمِ، فَلَمّا فَرَغَ مِن نَضجِهِ عَرَّفَهُ (قَرَّبَهُ) لِلصِّغارِ وأمَرَهُم بِأكلِهِ.

فَلَمّا شَبِعوا أخَذَ يَطوفُ بِالبَيتِ ويُبَعبِعُ لَهُم، فَأَخَذوا فِي الضَّحِكِ.

فَلَمّا خَرَجَ عليه السلام قالَ لَهُ قَنبَرٌ: يا مَولايَ، رَأَيتُ اللَّيلَةَ شَيئاً عَجيباً قَد عَلِمتُ سَبَبَ بَعضِهِ؛ وهُوَ حَملُكَ لِلزّادِ طَلَباً لِلثَّوابِ، أمّا طَوافُكَ بِالبَيتِ عَلى يَدَيكَ ورِجلَيكَ وَالبَعبَعَةُ فَما أدري سَبَبَ ذلِكَ!

فَقالَ عليه السلام: يا قَنبَرُ، إنّي دَخَلتُ عَلى هؤُلاءِ الأَطفالِ وهُم يَبكونَ مِن شِدَّةِ الجوعِ، فَأَحبَبتُ أن أخرُجَ عَنهُم وهُم يَضحَكونَ مَعَ الشِّبعِ، فَلَم أجِد سَبَباً سِوى ما فَعَلتُ.

1. al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 49, narrating from al-Fadl ibn Abu Qurrah from Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.). ‘Uddah al-Da’i, p. 79.

2. . al-Firdaws, vol. 3, p. 549, h. 5715, narrating from Thawban.

3. . al-Tabaqat al-Kubra, vol. 7, p. 32. Usd al-Ghabah, vol. 6, p. 366, no. 6477.

4. . Tarikh Dimashq, vol. 52, p. 363, h. 11070. Kanz al-Ummal, vol. 16, p. 585, h. 45958.

5. . Hilyah al-Awliya’, vol. 2, p. 231. al-Adab al-Mufrad, p. 40, h. 89.

6. . al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 50, h. 5, narrating from Ibn Abu ‘Umair from someone who narrated it. Kitab Man la Yahdarhu al-Faqih, vol. 3, p. 482, h. 4695.

7. . Prophet Moses.

8. . al-Mahasin, vol. 1, p. 457, h. 1057. Makarim al-Akhlaq, vol. 1, p. 505, h. 1751. Both narrating from al-Masawir. Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 104, p. 79, h. 57.

9. . Musnad Ibn Hanbal, vol. 5, p. 517, h. 16379. al-Mustadrak ‘ala al-Sahihain, vol. 3, p. 107, h. 4546.

10. . Sahih Muslim, vol. 4, p. 1808, h. 63. Sahih Ibn Habban, vol. 15, p. 400, h. 6950.

11. . Sahih Muslim, vol. 4, p. 1885, h. 66. al-Sunan al-Kubra, vol. 5, p. 427, h. 10374.

12. . Musnad Ibn Hanbal, vol. 5, p. 454, h. 16129.

13. . al-Mahajjah al-Bayda, vol. 3, p. 366.

14. . al-Manaqib by Ibn Shahr Ashub, vol. 3, p. 388. Thakha’ir al-’Uqba, p. 226.

15. . Kanz al-Ummal, vol. 7, p. 156, h. 18497, narrating from al-Bukhari from ‘Anas.

16. . Sunan al-Tirmidhi, vol. 5, p. 57, h. 2696.

17. . Makarim al-Akhlaq, vol. 1, p. 47, h. 5. Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 16, p. 229.

18. . al-Khisal, p. 271, h. 12, narrating from Isma’il ibn Ziyad. ‘Uyun Akhbar al-Ridha (a.s.), vol. 2, p. 81, h. 14, narrating from al-’Abbas ibn Hilal from Imam al-Ridha (a.s.) fron his forefathers (a.s.).

19. . Sahih Ibn Habban, vol. 2, p. 206, h. 459. Mawarid al-Zam’an, p. 526, h. 2145.

20. . Sahih Muslim, vol. 4, p. 1808, h. 64. Sunan Ibn Majah, vol. 2, p. 1209, h. 3665.

21. . al-Adab al-Mufrad, p. 41, h. 91. Musnad Ibn Hanbal, vol. 3, p. 96, h. 7653.

22. . al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 50, h. 7. Tahdhib al-Ahkam, vol. 8, p. 113, h. 391.

23. . Qur’an, 63:9.

24. . Qur’an, 64:14.

25. . Qur’an, 26:88,89.

26. . Makarim al-Akhlaq, vol. 2, p. 359, h. 2660, narrating from Ibn Mas’ud. Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 77, p. 108, h. 1.

27. . Qur’an, 64:14.

28. . Sunan al-Tirmidhi, vol. 5, p. 419, h. 3317. al-Mu’jam al-Kabir, vol. 11, p. 220, h. 11720.

29. . Nahj al-Balaghah, Wise Saying 352. Mishkat al-Anwar, p. 159, h. 401. Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 104, p. 73, h. 20.

30. . Mustardak al-Wasa’il, vol. 15, p. 215, h. 18040.

31. . Mustardak al-Wasa’il, vol. 15, p. 171, h. 17898.

32. . Tafsir al-’Ayyashi, vol. 2, p. 166, h. 2. Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 74, p. 78, h. 74.

33. . al-Sunan al-Kubra, vol. 6, p. 294, h. 12000. al-Mu’jam al-Kabir, vol. 11, p. 280, h. 11997. Both narrating from Ibn ‘Abbas.

34. . Sahih al-Bukhari, vol. 2, p. 913, narrating from Ibn ‘Abbas.

35. . Sahih Ibn Habban, vol. 11, p. 503, h. 5104, narrating from al-Nu’man ibn Bashir. Makarim al-Akhlaq, vol. 1, p. 473, h. 1624.

36. . Kanz al-Ummal, vol. 16, p. 445, h. 45350, narrating from Ibn al-Najjar from al-Nu’man ibn Bashir.

37. . This could be Imam Hasan al-Mujtaba (a.s.), or Hasan al-Basri.

38. . al-’Ayal, vol. 1, p. 173, h. 36.

39. . al-Ja’fariyat, p. 55. al-Nawadir, p. 96, h. 43. Both narrating from Imam al-Kazim (a.s.) from his forefathers (a.s.).

40. . Sahih al-Bukhari, vol. 2, p. 914, h. 2447. al-Sunan al-Kubra, vol. 6, p. 292, h. 11994. al-Musannif by Ibn Abu Shaybah, vol. 8, p. 366, h. 2. Kanz al-Ummal, vol. 16, p. 585, h. 45957. Sahih Muslim, vol. 3, p. 1241- 1244. Sunan al-Nisa’i, vol. 6, p. 260. al-Sunan al-Kubra, vol. 6, p. 293, h. 11996. Sunan al-Darquini, vol. 3, p. 42, h. 171. Sunan Ibn Majah, vol. 2, p. 795, h. 2376.

41. . Sharh Nahj al-Balaghah, vol. 16, p. 27, narrating from al-Mada’ini.

42. . Given that there are differences in Islamic narrations about parents’ giving priority to some of their children when giving gifts to them, there are also differences of opinion among the Shi’ah and Sunni jurists.There are three views among the Shi’ah jurists:1) Preference (differentiating between children) is permissible except for the time when the person who gives the gift is not financially capable, or is sick, in which case giving a gift becomes unrecommended (makruh); and if the sickness leads to death, the gift will be counted from the whole wealth and not from the one third of it.2) Preference of a child is discouraged and equality between the children is a recommended action.3) Preference of a child is prohibited, unless he has a particular privilege.The Sunni jurists are divided into two groups: the followers of analogy and counsel (Ahl al-Qiyas wa al-Ra’i), and the followers of the apparent text (Ahl al-Zahir).The followers of analogy and counsel say: It is a consensus that anybody can gift all his wealth and property to another person, so presenting a part of the wealth to some of his children cannot be counted as unlawful. Therefore, the narrations that refer to the unlawfulness of preference should be regarded as an unrecommended act.As for the followers of the apparent text, they are of two groups: Some who take the surface meaning of the words and so consider it prohibited, and the other group have added the phrase: “Then others should take witness on this.” to their arguments, concluding that if giving priority was prohibited, the Prophet should have not asked for another witness. Therefore, combining these traditions, the conclusion should be that it is unrecommended.

43. . Tafsir al-’Ayyashi, vol. 2, p. 166, h. 2. Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 74, p. 78, h. 74.

44. . al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 49, h. 3. Tahdhib al-Ahkam, vol. 8, p. 113, h. 389. Both narrating from ‘Abdullah ibn Muhammad al-Bijli from Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.).

45. . al-Ja’fariyat, p. 166, narrating from Imam al-Kazim (a.s.) from his forefathers (a.s.).

46. . al-Sunan al-Kubra, vol. 10, p. 335, h. 20839. al-Isabah, vol. 4, p. 120.

47. . al-Amali, by al-Saduq, p. 505, h. 696, narrating from Harith al-A’war. Mishkat al-Anwar, p. 302, h. 935. Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 72, p. 259, h. 24.

48. . al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 50, h. 8, narrating from Kulaib al-Saidawi. ‘Uddah al-Da’i, p. 75.

49. . al-Kamil fi Du’afa’ al-Rijal, vol. 1, p. 203, narrating from ‘A’ishah. Kanz al-Ummal, vol. 3, p. 170, h. 6009.

50. . Mustardak al-Wasa’il, vol. 6, p. 99, h. 6525, narrating from al-Qutb al-Rawandi in Lub al-Albab.

51. . Kanz al-Ummal, vol. 3, p. 170, h. 6008, narrating from Ibn al-Najjar from ‘Aqabah ibn Àmir.

52. . al-Kafi, vol. 7, p. 51, h. 7, narrating from ‘Abd al-Rahman ibn al-Hajjaj from Imam al-Kazim (a.s.) from Imam ‘Ali (a.s.). Kitab Man la Yahdarhu al-Faqih, vol. 4, p. 190, h. 5433, narrating from Salim ibn Qays from Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) from the Prophet (s.a.w.). Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 42, p. 248, h. 51.

53. . Both are cities in Ancient Persia.

54. . al-Kafi, vol. 1, p. 406, h. 5. Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 41, p. 123, h. 30.

55. . Rabi’ al-Abrar, vol. 2, p. 148. al-Mi’yar wa al-Muwazanah, p. 251. al-Manaqib by Ibn Shahr Ashub, vol. 2, p. 75.

56. . al-Manaqib by Ibn Shahr Ashub, vol. 2, p. 115. Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 41, p. 52.

57. . Kashf al-Yaqin, p. 136, h. 129.

Part 11

Ornamentation and Playing

5.1: Ornamenting Children

373. al-Kafi, narrating from Abu Sabah who said: “I asked Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) about ornamenting children with gold and he (a.s.) said: “‘Ali ibn al-Husayn [al-Sajjad] (a.s.) would put gold and silver ornaments [jewellery] on his children and women.”1

374. al-Kafi, narrating from Husayn ibn Khalid who said: “When I asked Abu al-Hasan al-Ridha (a.s.) about when to congratulate for a child’s birth, he said: ‘When Hasan ibn ‘Ali (a.s.) was born Gabriel descended on the seventh day to congratulate the Prophet (s.a.w.) and ordered him to choose a name and nickname for him, shave his head, sacrifice an offering and make a hole on his ear. The same thing happened when Husayn (a.s.) was born, where on the seventh day Gabriel came to the Prophet (s.a.w.) and ordered him to do the same things.” He then said: “They had two ringlets on the left ear. The hole in the right ear was on the earlobe and the hole on the left ear was on the upper part. The right ear had an earring (qurt) and the left ear had an ear ornament (shanf).”2

تَزيينُ الأطفالِ‏

373. الكافي عن أبي الصّباح: سَألتُ أبا عَبدِ اللهِ عليه السلام عَنِ الذَّهَبِ يُحَلَّى بِهِ الصِّبيانُ، فَقالَ: كانَ عَلِيّ بنُ الحُسَينِ عليه السلام يُحَلّي وُلدَهُ ونِساءَهُ بِالذَّهَبِ وَالفِضَّةِ.

374. الكافي عن الحسين بن خالد: سَألتُ أبَا الحَسَنِ الرِّضا عليه السلام عَنِ التَّهنِئَةِ بِالوَلَدِ مَتى؟ فَقالَ: إِنَّهُ قالَ: لَمّا وُلِدَ الحَسَنُ بنُ عَلِيٍّ عليه السلام هَبَطَ جَبرَئيلُ بِالتَّهنِئَةِ عَلَى النَّبِيِّ صلى الله عليه وآله فِي اليَومِ السّابِعِ، وأمَرَهُ أن يُسَمِّيَهُ ويُكَنِّيَهُ ويَحلِقَ رَأسَهُ ويَعُقَّ عَنهُ ويَثقُبَ أُذُنَهُ، وكَذلِكَ كانَ حينَ وُلِدَ الحُسَينُ عليه السلام، أتاهُ فِي اليَومِ السّابِعِ فَأَمَرَهُ بِمِثلِ ذلِكَ. قالَ: وكانَ لَهُما ذُؤابَتانِ فِي القَرنِ الأيْسَرِ، وكانَ الثَّقبُ في الأُذُنِ اليُمنى فِي شَحمَةِ الأُذُنِ، وفي اليُسرى فِي أعلَى الأُذُنِ، فَالقُرطُ فِي اليُمنى وَالشَّنفُ‏ فِي اليُسرى.

5.2: Praising the Playfulness of Children

375. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “The child’s playfulness in his childhood causes his intellect to strengthen in his adult age.”3

376. al-Kafi, narrating from Salih ibn ‘Aqabah who said: “I heard the ‘Righteous Servant’ [Imam al-Kazim] (a.s.) say: “It is a recommended practice for a child to play in his childhood so that he becomes patient in his adult age.” Then he said: “It is not right to do otherwise.”

It also narrated that the most intelligent of children are those who hate schooling the most.4

مَدحُ عَرامَةِ الصَّبِيِ‏

375. رسول الله صلى الله عليه وآله: عَرامَةُ الصَّبيّ في صِغَرِهِ زِيادَةٌ في عَقلِهِ في كِبَرِهِ.

376. الكافي عن صالح بن عقبة: سَمِعتُ العَبدَ الصّالِحَ عليه السلام يَقولُ: تُستَحَبُّ عَرامَةُ الصَّبِيّ فِي صِغَرِهِ لِيَكونَ حَليماً في كِبَرِهِ، ثُمَّ قالَ: ما يَنبَغي أن يَكونَ إلّا هكَذا.

ورُوِيَ أنَّ أكيَسَ الصِّبيانِ أشَدُّهُم بُغضاً لِلكُتّابِ‏ .

5.3: Allowing a Child to Play

377. Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) said: “Leave the child alone to play for seven years, then he is to be disciplined for seven years, and then keep him close to you for seven years. If he became prosperous then that is good, but if not, he is among those in whom there is no good.”5

378. Imam al-Sajjad (a.s.) said: “The Prophet (s.a.w.) said to the two [Hasan and Husayn] (a.s.): “Stand up and wrestle each other.”

They stood up to wrestle when Fatimah (a.s.) who had gone out for some needs had come back home and heard the Prophet (s.a.w.) saying: “Again, O Hasan! Take Husayn firmly and knock him down!”

So she said to her father: “O father, what a wonder! Do you encourage one against the other? Do you encourage the elder against the younger?”

Then he (s.a.w.) said to her: “O daughter! Are you not happy that I say: “O Hasan! Take Husayn firmly and knock him down,” while my beloved Gabriel is saying: “O Husayn! Take Hasan firmly and knock him down?”6

379. al-Mu’jam al-Kabir, narrating from Abu Ayub al-Ansari who said: “I went to the Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.) while Hasan and Husayn were sitting in front of him on his lap playing, so I said: “O Messenger of Allah! Do you love them?”

He said: “How can I not love them and they are my two basils that I scent in this world.”7

380. al-Mu’jam al-Kabir, narrating from Abu Sa’id who said: “The Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.) was praying when Husayn (a.s.) came in and took hold of the Prophet’s neck. Then he (s.a.w.) stood up and held Husayn’s hand and kept on holding it until he went to bow.”8

381. Sharh al-Akhbar, narrating from Ja’far ibn Farwi who narrates: “The Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.) was sitting down with his companions when Hasan and Husayn (a.s.) came to him. They were young and they were leaping on him, so at times he would bring his head down for them and at other times he would pick them up and kiss them. A man who was in his gathering was looking at him with astonishment to what he was doing. He said: “O Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.), I don’t think I have ever kissed my child.” The Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.) got angry so much that the colour of his skin changed and he said to the man: “If Allah has extracted mercy from your heart, then what can I do to you? He who does not have mercy on our little ones and honours our elders is not considered among us.”9

382. Sunan al-Nisai, narrating from ‘Abdullah ibn Shaddad, from his father who said: “In one of the evening and night prayers the Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.) came to us while he was carrying either Hasan or Husayn. The Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.) came forward and put him on the ground. Then he performed his takbir and started his prayer. During his prayer he prostrated for a long time. My father said: “I raised my head and I saw a child on the back of the Messenger of Allah while he was prostrated, then I returned back to my prostration. When the Messenger of Allah finished the prayer, the people said: “O Messenger of Allah! You had a long prostration in the middle of your prayers in a way that we thought something might have happened or something was being revealed unto you.”

He said: “It was neither, but my son mounted on my shoulder and I did not like to dismount him hastily until he finished what he was doing.”10

383. al-Manaqib, narrating from Ibn Shahr Ashub from Layth ibn Sa’d who said: “The Prophet (s.a.w.) was praying one day with a group of people when Husayn who was a young boy was beside him. Whenever the Prophet (s.a.w.) fell in prostration, Husayn (a.s.) would come and mount on his shoulder and then shake his feet saying: “Hie! Hie!”

When the Prophet of Allah (s.a.w.) wanted to raise his head, he would take him and put him beside him, and as soon as he prostrated again, Husayn would return on his back and say: “Hie! Hie!” He did not cease doing it until the Prophet (s.a.w.) finished his prayers.

It was at this time that a Jew said: “O Muhammad! You treat the children a way that we do not.”

The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “Indeed if you believed in Allah and His Messenger, you would certainly be kind to the children.”

The Jew said: “I therefore believe in Allah and His Messenger.” He became a Muslim when he saw the generosity of someone who was of very high ranking importance.”11

384. al-Mustadrak ‘ala al-Sahihain, narrating from Ya’la al-‘Àmiri who said: “He [Yahya] went out with the Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.) to a feast they were invited to. The Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.) was walking in front of the group and Husayn was playing with some boys. When the Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.) wanted to take him, the child [Husayn] would run around here and there, so the Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.) made him laugh until he took him.

He (s.a.w.) put one of his hands under his neck and the other hand under his chin, and then kissed him on his mouth.

He (s.a.w.) then said: “Husayn is from me and I am from Husayn. Allah loves he who loves Husayn. Husayn is an offspring (sibt) among the offsprings (asbat of the prophets).”12 13

385. al-Manaqib, by Ibn Shahr Ashub narrates from ‘Abdullah ibn Shaybah, from his father who said: “The Prophet (s.a.w.) was called to prayer while Hasan was clinging onto him, so the Prophet (s.a.w.) put him down in front of him and prayed. When prostrating he prolonged the prostration. From among people, I raised my head and I saw Hasan (a.s.) on the shoulder of the Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.). When he concluded his prayers, people told him: “O Messenger of Allah! You performed a prostration in your prayer that you do not usually perform, like as if a revelation was descending unto you.”

He (s.a.w.) said: “There was no revelation, but my son was on my shoulder, and I did not want to hasten until he himself would come down.”

And in the narration by ‘Abdullah ibn Shaddad it is said that the Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “My son mounted on my shoulder, and I did not like to put him down hastily until he finished what he was doing.”14

رُخصَةُ اللَّعِبِ لِلصَّبِيِ‏

377. الإمام الصادق عليه السلام: دَع ابنَكَ يَلعَبُ سَبعَ سِنينَ، ويُؤَدَّبُ سَبعَ سِنينَ، وألزِمهُ نَفسَكَ سَبعَ سِنينَ، فإن أفلَحَ، وإلّا فَإنّهُ مِمَّن لا خَيرَ فيهِ.

378. الإمام زين العابدين عليه السلام: قالَ النَّبِيُ صلى الله عليه وآله لَهُما [لِلحَسَنِ وَالحُسَينِ عليهما السلام‏]: قُوما الآنَ فاصطَرعا، فَقاما لِيَصطَرِعا، وقَد خَرَجَت فاطِمَةُ عليها السلام في بَعضِ حاجَتِها، فَدَخَلَت فَسَمِعَتِ النَّبِيَ صلى الله عليه وآله وهُوَ يَقولُ: إيهِ‏ يا حَسَنُ! شُدَّ عَلَى الحُسَينِ فَاصرَعهُ.

فَقالَت لَهُ: يا أبَه، واعَجَباهُ! أتُشَجِّعُ هذا عَلى هذا، أتُشَجِّعُ الكَبيرَ عَلَى الصَّغيرِ؟!

فَقالَ لَها: يا بُنَيَّةُ، أما تَرضَينَ أن أَقولَ أنا: يا حَسَنُ، شُدَّ عَلَى الحُسَينِ فَاصرَعهُ، وهذا حَبيبي جَبرَئيلُ يَقولُ: يا حُسَينُ، شُدَّ عَلَى الحَسَنِ فَاصرَعهُ؟

379. المعجم الكبير عن أبي أيّوب الأنصاريّ: دَخَلتُ عَلى رَسولِ الله صلى الله عليه وآله وَالحَسَنُ وَالحُسَينُ عليهما السلام يَلعَبانِ بَينَ يَدَيهِ وفي حِجرِهِ، فَقُلتُ: يا رَسولَ اللهِ أتُحِبُّهُما؟ قالَ: وكَيفَ لا أُحِبُّهُما وهُما رَيحانَتايَ مِنَ الدُّنيا أشَمُّهما!

380. المعجم الكبير عن أبي سعيد: جاءَ الحُسَينُ عليه السلام ورَسولُ الله صلى الله عليه وآله يُصَلّي، فَالتَزَمَ عُنُقَ النَّبِيّ صلى الله عليه وآله، فَقامَ بِهِ وأخَذَ بِيَدِهِ، فَلَم يَزَل مُمسِكَها حَتّى رَكَعَ.

381. شرح الأخبار عن جعفر بن فروي بإسناده: أنّ رَسولَ اللهِ صلى الله عليه وآله كانَ جالِساً مَعَ أصحابِهِ، إذ أقبَلَ إلَيهِ الحَسَنُ وَالحُسَينُ عليهما السلام وَهُما صَغيرانِ، فَجَعَلا يَنزُوانِ‏ عَلَيهِ، فَمَرَّةً يَضَعُ لَهُما رَأسَهُ، ومَرَّةً يَأخُذُهُما إلَيهِ، فَقَبَّلَهُما، ورَجُلٌ مِن جُلَسائِهِ يَنظُرُ إلَيهِ كَالمُتَعَجِّبِ مِن ذلِكَ، ثُمَّ قالَ: يا رَسولَ اللهِ، ما أعلَمُ أنِّي قَبَّلتُ وَلَدا إلَيّ قَطُّ!

فَغَضِبَ رَسولُ اللهِ صلى الله عليه وآله حَتَّى التَمَعَ لَونُهُ، فَقالَ لِلرَّجُلِ: إن كانَ اللهُ قَد نَزَعَ الرَّحمَةَ مِن قَلبِكَ فَما أصنَعُ بِكَ؟ مَن لَم يَرحَم صَغيرَنا ويُعَزِّز كَبيرَنا فَلَيسَ مِنَّا.

382. سنن النسائي عن عبد الله بن شدّاد عن أبيه: خَرَجَ عَلَينا رَسولُ اللهِ صلى الله عليه وآله في إحدى صَلاتَي العِشاءِ وهُوَ حامِلٌ حَسَناً أو حُسَيناً، فَتَقَدَّمَ رَسولُ اللهِ صلى الله عليه وآله فَوَضَعَهُ، ثُمَّ كَبَّرَ لِلصَّلاةِ فَصَلّى، فَسَجَدَ بَينَ ظَهرانَي صَلاتِهِ سَجدَةً أطالَها، قالَ أبي: رَفَعتُ رَأسي وإذا الصَّبِيّ عَلى ظَهرِ رَسولِ اللهِ صلى الله عليه وآله وهُوَ ساجِدٌ، فَرَجَعتُ إلى سُجودِي. فَلَمّا قَضى رَسولُ اللهِ صلى الله عليه وآله الصَّلاةَ، قالَ النّاسُ: يا رَسولَ اللهِ، إنَّكَ سَجَدتَ بَينَ ظَهرانَي صَلاتِكَ سَجدَةً أطَلتَها حَتّى ظَنَنَّا قَد أنَّهُ حَدَثَ أمرٌ أو أنَّهُ يُوحى إلَيكَ.

قالَ: كُلُّ ذلِكَ لَم يَكُن، ولكِنَّ ابني ارتَحَلَني فَكَرِهتُ أن اعجِلَهُ حَتّى يَقضِيَ حاجَتَهُ.

383. المناقب لابن شهر آشوب عن الليث بن سعد: أنَّ النَّبِيَّ صلى الله عليه وآله كانَ يُصَلّي يَوماً في فِئَةٍ وَالحُسَينُ عليه السلام صَغِيرٌ بِالقُربِ مِنهُ، وكانَ النَّبِيّ إذا سَجَدَ جاءَ الحُسَينُ عليه السلام فَرَكِبَ ظَهرَهُ ثُمَّ حَرَّكَ رِجلَيهِ، وقالَ: حِل حِل.

وإذا أرادَ رَسولُ اللهِ أن يَرفَعَ رَأسَهُ أخَذَهُ فَوَضَعَهُ إلى جانِبِهِ، فَإذا سَجَدَ عادَ عَلى ظَهرِهِ، وقالَ: حِل حِل، فَلَم يَزَل يَفعَلُ ذلِكَ حَتّى فَرَغَ النَّبِيّ مِن صَلاتِهِ.

فَقالَ يَهودِيٌ: يا مُحَمَّدُ، إنَّكُم لَتَفعَلونَ بِالصِّبيانِ شَيئاً ما نَفعَلُهُ نَحنُ!

فَقالَ النَّبِيّ صلى الله عليه وآله: أما لَو كُنتُم تُؤمِنونَ بِاللهِ وبِرَسولِهِ لَرَحِمتُمُ الصِّبيانَ.

قالَ: فَإنِّي اؤمِنُ بِاللهِ وبِرَسُولِهِ. فَأَسلَمَ لَمّا رَأى كَرَمَهُ مِن‏ عِظَمِ قَدرِهِ.

384. المستدرك على الصحيحينَ عن يعلى العامري: أنَّهُ خَرَجَ مَعَ رَسولِ اللهِ صلى الله عليه وآله إلى طَعامٍ دُعوا لَهُ، قالَ: فَاستَقبَلَ رَسولُ اللهِ صلى الله عليه وآله أمامَ القَومِ وحُسَينٌ مَعَ الغِلمانِ يَلعَبُ، فَأرادَ رَسولُ اللهِ صلى الله عليه وآله أن يَأخُذَهُ، فَطَفِقَ‏ الصَّبِيُ يَفِرُّ هاهُنا مَرَّةً وَهاهُنا مَرَّةً، فَجَعَلَ رَسولُ اللهِ صلى الله عليه وآله يُضاحِكُهُ حَتّى أخَذَهُ.

فَقالَ: حُسَينٌ مِنِّي وأنا مِن حُسَينٍ، أحَبَّ اللهُ مَن أحَبَّ حُسَينا، حُسَينٌ سِبطٌ مِنَ الأسباطِ.

385. المناقب لابن شهر آشوب عن عبد الله بن شيبة عن أبيه: أنَّهُ دُعِيَ النَّبِيُّ صلى الله عليه وآله إلى صَلاةٍ وَالحَسَنُ مُتَعَلِّقٌ بِهِ، فَوَضَعَهُ النَّبِيُ صلى الله عليه وآله مُقابِلَ جَنبِهِ وصَلّى، فَلَمّا سَجَدَ أطالَ السُّجودَ، فَرَفَعتُ رَأسي مِن بَينِ القَومِ فَاذا الحَسَنُ عَلى كَتِفِ رَسولِ اللهِ صلى الله عليه وآله، فَلَمّا سَلَّم قالَ لَهُ القَومُ: يا رَسولَ اللهِ لَقَد سَجَدتَ في صَلاتِكَ هذِهِ سَجدَةً ما كُنتَ تَسجُدُها، كَأنَّما يوحى إلَيكَ!

فَقالَ [صلى الله عليه وآله‏]: لَم يُوحَ إلَيّ، ولكنَّ ابني كانَ عَلَى كَتِفي فَكَرِهتُ أن اعجِلَهُ حَتّى نَزَلَ.

وفي رِوايَةِ عَبدِ اللهِ بنِ شَدّادٍ أنَّهُ صلى الله عليه وآله قَالَ: إنَّ ابنِي هذَا ارتَحَلَني فَكَرِهتُ أن اعجِلَهُ حَتّى يَقضِيَ حاجَتَهُ. قالَ: فَوَضَعَ إحدى يَدَيهِ تَحتَ قَفاهُ، وَالاخرى تَحتَ ذَقَنِهِ، فَوَضَعَ فاهُ عَلى فيهِ يُقَبِّلُهُ.

5.4: Acting in a Childish Manner for Children And Playing with Them

386. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “He who has a child must treat him in a childish manner.”15

387. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said: “He who has a child he must act as a child [with him].”16

388. Kanz al-Ummal, narrating from ÞAnas, who said: “The Messenger of Allah was playing with Zainab bint Um Salamah [his step-daughter] and he repeatedly said: “O little Zainab! O little Zainab.”17

389. Sunan ibn Majah, narrating from Sa’id ibn Abu Rashid who said: “Ya’la ibn Marrah narrated to them that they went out with the Prophet (s.a.w.) to a feast they were invited to. On their way, they saw Husayn (a.s.) playing in the alley.

The Prophet (s.a.w.) went ahead of the group and stretched out his hands, but the boy [Husayn] (a.s.) started running around, so the Prophet (s.a.w.) made him laugh until he took him.

He (s.a.w.) put one of his hands under his chin and the other hand on the back of his head, and then kissed him.

He (s.a.w.) then said: “Husayn is from me and I am from Husayn. Allah loves he who loves Husayn. Husayn is an offspring (sibt) of the offsprings (asbat of the prophets).”18

390. Sahih ibn Habban, narrating from Abu Hurayrah who said: “The Prophet (s.a.w.) would stick out his tongue for Husayn who when seeing the reddish tip of the tongue he would laugh. Then ‘Uyayna ibn Badr asked him: “What do I see and why does he do this for him? I have a son whose beard has grown out, but I have never kissed him.”

The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “He who does not show mercy will not be shown mercy.”19

391. al-Manaqib, narrating from Ibn Shahr Ashub who narrated from Ibn Mahad from his father who said: “The Prophet (s.a.w.) once knelt down for Hasan and Husayn and let them mount and set their hands and legs opposite each other 20 and he would say: “Your camel is a good camel.”21

392. Fada’il al-Sahabah, narrating from Abu Hurayrah who said: “I saw the Prophet (s.a.w.) holding the hands of Husayn ibn ‘Ali and was putting his feet on his own feet and saying: “Come up, O small eyed! Come up, O small eyed!”22

393. Kifayah al-Athar, narrating from Abu Hurayrah who said: “I along with Abu Bakr, ‘Umar, Fadl ibn ‘Abbas, Zaid ibn Harithah and ‘Abdullah ibn Mas’ud were with the Prophet (s.a.w.) when Husayn ibn ‘Ali (a.s.) entered and the Prophet (s.a.w.) took him and kissed him, and then said: “O little. O little! Come up, O small eyed!” He (s.a.w.) then put his mouth on Husayn’s mouth and said: “O Allah! I love him. So love him and love those who love him.”23

التَّصابي لِلصَّبِيِّ وَاللَّعِبُ مَعَهُ‏

386. رسول الله صلى الله عليه وآله: مَن كانَ عِندَهُ صَبِيّ فَليَتَصابَ لَهُ.

387. الإمام عليّ عليه السلام: مَن كانَ لَهُ وَلَدٌ صَبا.

388. كنز العمّال عن أنس: كانَ [رَسولُ الله صلى الله عليه وآله‏] يُلاعِبُ زَينَبَ‏ بِنتَ امِّ سَلَمَةَ ويَقولُ: يا زُوَينِبُ، يا زُوَينِبُ مِرارا.

389. سنن ابن ماجة عن سعيد بن أبي راشد: أنَّ يَعلَى بنَ مُرَّةَ حَدَّثَهُم أنَّهُم خَرَجوا مَعَ النَّبِيّ صلى الله عليه وآله إلى طَعامٍ دُعوا لَهُ، فَإذا حُسَينٌ يَلعَبُ فِي السِّكَّةِ ، قالَ: فَتَقَدَّمَ النَّبِيُ صلى الله عليه وآله أمامَ القَومِ وبَسَطَ يَدَيهِ، فَجَعَلَ الغُلامُ يَفِرُّ هاهُنا وهاهُنا، ويُضاحِكُهُ النَّبِيُ صلى الله عليه وآله حَتّى أخَذَهُ، فَجَعَلَ إحدى يَدَيهِ تَحتَ ذَقَنِهِ، وَالاخرى في فَأسِ‏ رَأسِهِ، فَقَبَّلَهُ وقالَ: حُسَينٌ مِنِّي وأنا مِن حُسَينٍ، أحَبَّ اللهُ مَنْ أحَبَّ حُسَيناً، حُسَينٌ سِبطٌ مِنَ الأَسباطِ .

390. صحيح ابن حبّان عن أبي هريرة: كانَ النَّبِيّ صلى الله عليه وآله يَدلَعُ‏ لِسانَهُ لِلحُسَينِ، فَيَرى الصَّبِيّ حُمرَةَ لِسانِهِ، فَقالَ النَّبِيُ صلى الله عليه وآله: مَن لا يَرحَمُ لا يُرحَمُ.

391. المناقب لابن شهرآشوب عن ابن مهاد عن أبيه: [أنَ‏] النَّبِيَّ صلى الله عليه وآله بَرَكَ لِلحَسَنِ وَالحُسَينِ فَحَمَلَهُما وخالَفَ بَينَ أيديهِما وأرجُلِهِما، وقالَ: نِعمَ الجَمَلُ جَمَلُكُما .

392. فضائل الصحابة عن أبي هريرة: رَأيتُ النَّبِيَّ صلى الله عليه وآله وقَد أخَذَ بِيَدَي الحُسَينِ بنِ عَلِيّ، وقَد وَضَعَ قَدَمَ الحُسَينِ عَلى ظَهرِ قَدَمَيهِ، وهُوَ يَقولُ: تَرَقَّ عَينَ بَقَّه‏ ، تَرَقَّ عَينَ بَقَّه.

393. كفاية الأثر عن أبي هريرة: كُنتُ عِندَ النَّبِيَّ صلى الله عليه وآله وأبو بَكرٍ وعُمَرُ وَالفَضلُ بنُ العَبّاسِ وزَيدُ بنُ حارِثَةَ وعَبدُ اللهِ بنُ مَسعودٍ، إذ دَخَلَ الحُسَينُ بنُ عَلِيّ عليه السلام، فَأَخَذَهُ النَّبِيُ صلى الله عليه وآله وقَبَّلَهُ، ثُمَّ قالَ: حِبِقَّةٌ حِبِقَّه، تَرقَّ عَينَ بَقَّه‏ ، ووَضَعَ فَمَهُ عَلى فَمِهِ، ثُمَّ قالَ: اللّهُمَّ إنّي احِبُّهُ فَأحِبَّهُ، وأحِبَّ مَن يُحِبُّهُ.

5.5: The Children’s Entertainment Place

394. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “Indeed, soil is the child’s place of entertainment.”24

395. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “I love children for five things: first: they cry a lot; second: they play with soil; third: they hate without malice; fourth: they do not store anything for the next day; fifth: they build something and then they ruin it.”25

رَبيعُ الصِّبيانِ‏

394. رسول الله صلى الله عليه وآله: إنَّ التُّرابَ رَبيعُ الصِّبيانِ.

395. عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: احِبُّ الصِّبيانَ لِخَمسٍ: الأوَّلُ: أنَّهُم هُمُ البَكَّاؤونَ، وَالثّاني: يَتَمرَّغونَ بِالتُّرابِ، وَالثّالِثُ: يَختَصِمونَ مِن غَيرِ حِقدٍ، وَالرّابِعُ: لا يَدَّخِرونَ لِغَدٍ شَيئا، وَالخامِسُ: يُعَمِّرونَ ثُمَّ يُخَرِّبونَ.

The Function of Playing in the Growth of a Child

Playing is the most serious subject in the life of a child. The term ‘playing’ for adults is equal to pass-time, vanity, negligence and so on, and they are things that only hinder advancement and progress, but as for a child, it is the cause of his growth and development. The child’s period of playing is not a period of the ceasing of progress, but it is a period of flourishing of talents through playing. This is why it has been recommended that you let your children play, and children who are playful will be clever and patient when they become adults.

The second tradition refers to the fundamental function playing has in the growth and elevation of one’s personality. A child who has not satiated his childhood in playing will show some childish behaviour when he grows up, and having such characteristics is an abnormal conduct some people are inflicted with in their adolescent and adult age. One of the causes of this abnormality is a child not fulfilling his natural needs, and this need is achieved only through acting like a child and playing.

The Importance of Playing from a Psychological Viewpoint

Any healthy and useful game a child engages in has many important benefits that can be easily seen in the psychological growth of the child’s personality.

1- The Physical Importance
The playing along with activities for the growth of the child’s muscles and giving exercises to different parts of the body is of high importance and value. These kinds of activities can also be useful for letting out the additional energy of the child. If the additional energy is not used in a correct way and it is stored unsatisfied in the child’s body, it makes him uneasy, nervous and bad tempered.

2- The Psychological Importance
Playing gives a child a chance to express his feelings. He can bring out his pressed energy by means of play. A child can express his feelings through fear, annoyance, anxiety, happiness and so on in the frame of his desired personalities however he likes and he can also let out his negative energy and inner hate.

3-The Upbringing Importance

It is by playing that the true personality of children takes it shape, and considerable changes happen in their spirit all of which are a passage to the higher stage of growth. Playing will provide a kind of development for the children, and it is here that the opportunities and facilities in upbringing are made manifest and certain.

4-The Social Importance

In playing a child learns how to socially communicate with others who are outside his family unit and learns how to solve the problems and difficulties emerging from these kind of communications, and he also learns how to socially adapt with others.

5-The Educational Importance

By means of playing with different kinds of toys a child can succeed to learn and recognize colours, shapes, sizes, materials, different kinds of things and their importance. Playing helps a child recognize the world in which he lives in, and also to comprehend, touch, feel, and manage things. It also helps him to differentiate between reality and delusion.

6-The Moral Importance

In the period of playing, a child learns what is good and what is bad! The child finds out that if he desires to be counted as an acceptable person in an activity he must be truthful, trustworthy, fair, disciplined, truth seeking, honest, independent and so on.

A Psychological Analysis of Playing

Different theories have been given by psychologists in regards to analysing and explaining the role of playing in children. Some of these theories are: The theory of extra power, the theory of removing tension, the theory of evolving renewal; and the theory of pre-exercise.

A- The Theory of Extra Power

According to this theory, when the energy of the body increases more than its normal level as seen in playing, their bodily organs feel extra powerful. This theory cannot justify the motionless and hidden playing of children that do not need any physical activity.26

B- The Theory of Removing Tension

This theory that says playing returns back the consumed power, means a person’s body will get tired after working and doing activities, and it needs a kind of practice by which the tension can be removed, which is to play. Therefore, the need to play appears when the bodily power has reached its lowest level, and not when it has extra energy. This theory which has been offered by Schaller and Muris Lazarus does not identify the playing that is done after the full resting of a child.

C- The Theory of Evolving Renewal

Based on this theory that has been suggested by S. Hall, children renew the scenes and activities of their ancestors that were produced due to the need of their life in their plays. For example, in certain playing fishing, boating, hunting and the like, the child repeats the outline of the life of his ancestors who were cave dwellers.

D- The Attitude of Pre-exercise

Basing upon this theory which was given by K. Groos, playing is considered as a kind of preparation in a child for his future activities. According to this view, the content of playing is formed by activities that the child must have in the maturity period and adult age.

Although this theory points to the function of playing in the socializing of a child that was not mentioned in the former theories, but it can not yet define all the childish playing, like imitating animals.27

The Age of Playing

Another issue is the age of playing. Some traditions indicate that a child must be allowed to play until he is seven years old. Does this mean that after this age he should not be allowed to play? In narrations the first seven years is counted as the period of playing, and the second seven years is the period of disciplining. Accordingly, it mostly emphasizes that during the first seven years disciplining should not be performed. Of course, there is no doubt that the narration indicates that the first seven years is specifically for playing and in this age the child must be left to play. But is playing forbidden during this period? Or is it that playing is reproached during this time, and even though disciplining is done but playing is allowed according to the age and any certain conditions.

It seems that the second state is more fitting, meaning that in the second seven years disciplining begins, but according to a child’s conditions he can also play. Of course, this playing is not general and without limitations (like the first seven years), and as it is in the period of disciplining it must have some limitations. This matter can be studied more in psychological researches.

The Parents Playing with the Child

Besides giving permission to play, the parents’ themselves playing with the child is itself another important factor. On one side, playing is an important pillar of the child’s life, and on the other side, parents are a part of child’s life and they have a particular position for them. This is why it is very important for the child that his parents enter into his world. It is here that playing with child takes its importance. Since parents are the most important persons for the child, playing with him causes honour for the child and elevation of his self esteem. It produces the feeling of self-worthiness and self-motivation. It also strengthens the relationship of the child with the parents, and it has a fundamental function in the loyalty and sincerity of their relationship, being one of the necessary features in the parent - child relationship.

Buying various toys which are sophisticated and expensive does not bring about a child’s consent in his relationship with his parents. He only wishes that his parents understand him and his world and participate in it.

On this basis, there are two issues that can be seen in the teachings of religion. One is the parents playing with children (which had been abundantly seen in the conduct of the Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.)), and the other is that parents should play with their children like a child. Adults’ playing their own way is not pleasant and satisfying for the child, but it is childish playing that satisfies the child and develops his personality and teaches him the skills of life. This is why the Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.) played childishly with children.

The important point is that adults’ playing with children is not vain and amusement, but it is a wise, mature, and intellectual practise and it does not decrease their honour.

1. al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 475, h. 1. Makarim al-Akhlaq, vol. 1, p. 197, h. 585, narrating from Dawud ibn Sarhan, with ‘my father’ instead of ‘‘Ali ibn al-Husayn’.

2. . al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 33, h. 6. Tahdhib al-Ahkam, vol. 7, p. 444, h. 1776, with ‘Abu ‘Abdullah’ instead of ‘Abu al-Hasan al-Ridha.

3. . Kanz al-Ummal, vol. 11, p. 91, h. 30747, narrating from al-Hakim from ‘Amr ibn Ma’dikub and Abu Musa al-Madini in his Amali from ‘Anas.

4. . al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 51, h. 2,3. Kitab Man la Yahdarhu al-Faqih, vol. 3, p. 493, h. 4748.

5. . Kitab Man la Yahdarhu al-Faqih, vol. 3, p. 492, h. 4743. Makarim al-Akhlaq, vol. 1, p. 477, h. 1647.

6. . al-Amali, by al-Saduq, p. 530, h. 717, narrating from Zaid al-Shahham from Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) from his father (a.s.). Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 43, p. 268, h. 25.

7. . al-Mu’jam al-Kabir, vol. 4, p. 156, h. 3990. Kanz al-Ummal, vol. 13, p. 671, h. 37712, narrating from Abu Na’im from Sa’d ibn Malik.

8. . al-Mu’jam al-Kabir, vol. 3, p. 51, h. 2657. Tarikh Dimashq, vol. 14, p. 162.

9. . Sharh al-Akhbar, vol. 3, p. 115, h. 1060.

10. . Sunan al-Nisa’i, p. 229. Musnad Ibn Hanbal, vol. 10, p. 453, h. 427718. al-Mustadrak ‘ala al-Sahihain, vol. 3, p. 726, h. 6631.

11. . al-Manaqib, by Ibn Shahr Ashub, vol. 4, p. 71. Sharh al-Akhbar, vol. 3, p. 86, h. 1013. Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 43, p. 296, h. 57.

12. . The word sibt (grandson) which is seen in the above tradition in the terminology of Hadith and the Qur’an points to the succession. The Prophet of Allah most probably intended to point the people to the successors after him.

13. . al-Mustadrak ‘ala al-Sahihain, vol. 3, p. 194, h. 4820. Musnad Ibn Hanbal, vol. 6, p. 177, h. 17572. al-Adab al-Mufrad, p. 116, h. 364.

14. . al-Manaqib by Ibn Shahr Ashub, vol. 4, p. 24. Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 43, p. 294.

15. . Kitab Man la Yahdarhu al-Faqih, vol. 3, p. 483, h. 4707. ‘Awali al-La’ali, vol. 3, p. 311, h.141.

16. . al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 50, h. 4, narrating from al-Asbagh ibn Nabatah.

17. . Kanz al-Ummal, vol. 7, p. 140, h. 18403, narrating from the book al-Diya’.

18. . Sunan Ibn Majah, vol. 1, p. 51, h. 144. al-Mu’jam al-Kabir, vol. 22, p. 274, h. 702.

19. . Sahih Ibn Habban, vol. 15, p. 431, h. 6975. Mawarid al-Zam’an, p. 553, h. 2236, with ‘for Hasan’ instead of ‘for Husayn’.

20. . This state can be in two forms: One is that those two sat back on back or face to face, and the other is that each of them sat on one side, one on the right and the other on the left.

21. . al-Manaqib by Ibn Shahr Ashub, vol. 3, p. 387. Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 43, p. 285, h. 50.

22. . Fadda’il al-Sahabah by Ibn Hanbal, vol. 2, p. 787, h. 1405. al-Adab al-Mufrad, p. 90, h. 270. Tarikh Dimashq, vol. 13, p. 194, h. 3161.

23. . Kifayah al-Athar, p. 81. al-Manaqib by Ibn Shahr Ashub, vol. 1, p. 148, which only narrates: “He (s.a.w.) said to Husayn (a.s.): “O little. O little! Come up, O small eyed!”.

24. . al-Mu’jam al-Kabir, vol. 6, p. 140, h. 5775, narrating from Sahl ibn Sa’d. Kanz al-Ummal, vol. 16, p. 458, h. 4543.25. . al-Mawa’iz al-’Adadiyah, p. 259.

26. . This attitude has been attributed to Spencer and Schaller.

27. . Play is a series of general ‘pre-exercises’ the aim of which is to prepare a ground for some organized actions for the future of the child. This attitude has been given by K. Groos.

Part 12

Supplication

6.1: Encouraging Supplication for Children

“And those who say: ‘O’ our Lord! Grant us from our wives and our offspring the joy of our eyes, and make us for the pious ones (their) Imams.”1

“My Lord! Make me a performer of the prayer, and of my offspring (too); Our Lord! And accept my petition.”2

“My Lord! Grant me that I may give thank Your favour which You have bestowed on me and on my parents, and that I may do good which pleases You and do good to me in respect of my offspring; surely I turn to You, and surely I am of those who submit.”3

396. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “The father’s prayer for the child is useful like water is for plants.”4

397. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “The father’s prayer for his child is like the prayer of a Prophet for his nation.”5

398. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “May the mercy of Allah be upon he who helps his child in being righteous, which is to forgive his faults and supplicate to Allah for him.”6

الحَثُّ عَلَى الدُّعاءِ لِلأولادِ

(وَ الَّذِينَ يَقُولُونَ رَبَّنا هَبْ لَنا مِنْ أَزْواجِنا وَ ذُرِّيَّاتِنا قُرَّةَ أَعْيُنٍ وَ اجْعَلْنا لِلْمُتَّقِينَ إِماماً).

(رَبِّ اجْعَلْنِي مُقِيمَ الصَّلاةِ وَ مِنْ ذُرِّيَّتِي رَبَّنا وَ تَقَبَّلْ دُعاءِ) .

(رَبِّ أَوْزِعْنِي أَنْ أَشْكُرَ نِعْمَتَكَ الَّتِي أَنْعَمْتَ عَلَيَّ وَ عَلى‏ والِدَيَّ وَ أَنْ أَعْمَلَ صالِحاً تَرْضاهُ وَ أَصْلِحْ لِي فِي ذُرِّيَّتِي إِنِّي تُبْتُ إِلَيْكَ وَ إِنِّي مِنَ الْمُسْلِمِينَ) .

396. رسول الله صلى الله عليه وآله: دُعاءُ الوالِدِ لِلوَلَدِ كَالماءِ لِلزَّرعِ بِصَلاحِهِ.

397. عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: دُعاءُ الوالِدِ لِوَلَدِهِ مِثلُ دُعاءِ النَّبِيِّ لِأُمَّتِهِ.

398. عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: رَحِمَ اللهُ مَن أعانَ وَلَدَهُ عَلى بِرِّهِ؛ وهُوَ أن يَعفُوَ عَن سَيِّئَتِهِ، ويَدعُوَ لَهُ فيما بَينَهُ وبَينَ اللهِ.

6.2: Reproaching of Supplicating Against the Children

399. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “Do not supplicate against yourselves, do not supplicate against your children and do not supplicate against your properties.”7

400. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “Do not supplicate against your children, lest it is accepted by Allah.”8

401. Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) said: “Any man who supplicates against his child will be stricken by Allah with poverty.”9

النَّهيُ عَنِ الدُّعاءِ عَلَى الأَولادِ

399. رسول الله صلى الله عليه وآله: لا تَدعوا عَلى أنفُسِكُم، ولا تَدعوا عَلى أولادِكُم، ولا تَدعُوا عَلى أموالِكُم.

400. عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: لا تَدعوا عَلى أولادِكُم أن تُوافِقَ مِنَ اللهِ إجابَةً.

401. الإمام الصادق عليه السلام: أيُّما رَجُلٍ دَعا عَلى وَلَدِهِ أورَثَهُ اللهُ الفَقرَ.

6.3: The Supplication of Imam al-Sajjad (a.s.) for his Children

402. Imam al-Sajjad (a.s.) said, in his supplication for his children: “O Allah, grant me by keeping my children alive, making them righteous for me and allowing me to be happy with them!

O Allah! Extend their ages for me, prolong their lives for me, raise the small ones, strengthen the weak ones, and safeguard their bodies for me and their faith and moral traits. Make them well in their souls, their limbs and everything that concerns me of their affairs, and pour out for me and through my hands their provisions!

Make them pious, fearing, insightful, hearing and obedient to You, and loving and advising to Your friends, and strictly resistant and detesting to all Your enemies! Amen!

O Allah! Strengthen my arm through them, straighten my bending back, multiply my number, adorn my presence, keep alive my remembrance, suffice me when I am away, help me in my needs, and make them loving towards me, affectionate, approaching, upright and obedient, and never disobedient, disrespectful, opposing, or offending!

Help me in their upbringing, their education, and my devotion to them. Give me male children among them from Yourself, make that something good for me, and make them a help for me in what I ask from You!

Give me and my progeny refuge from the accursed Satan, for You have created us, commanded us, and prohibited us, and made us desire the reward of what You have commanded, and fear its punishment! You assigned to us an enemy who schemes against us, gave him an authority over us in a way that You did not give us authority over him, allowed him to dwell in our breasts and let him run in our blood vessels; he is not heedless, though we are heedless, he does not forget, though we forget; he makes us feel secure from Your punishment and fills us with fear toward other than You. If we are about to commit an indecency, he gives us courage to do so, and if we are about to perform a righteous work, he holds us back from it. He opposes us through passions, and sets up for us doubts. If he promises us, he lies, and if he raises our hopes, he fails to fulfil them. If You do not turn his trickery away from us, he will misguide us, and if You do not protect us from his corruption, he will cause us to slip.

O Allah! So defeat his authority over us through Your authority, such that You hold him back from us through the frequency of our supplication to You and we leave his trickery and rise up among those preserved by You from sin!

O Allah! grant me my every request, accomplish for me my needs, withhold not from me Your response when You have made Yourself accountable for it to me, veil not my supplication from Yourself, when You have commanded me to make it, and be kind to me through everything that will set me right in this

world and the next, in everything that I remember or forget, display or conceal, make public or keep secret!

In all of this, place me through my asking You among those who set things right, those who are answered favourably when they request from You and from whom is not withheld when they put their trust in You, those accustomed to seek refuge in You , those who profit through commerce with You, those granted sanctuary through Your might, those given lawful provision abdundantly from Your boundless bounty through Your munificence and generosity, those who reach exaltation after abasement through You, those granted sanctuary from wrong through Your justice, those released from affliction through Your mercy, those delivered from need after poverty through Your riches, those preserved from sins, slips, and offences through reverential fear toward You, those successful in goodness, right conduct, and propriety through obeying You, those walled off from sins through Your power, the abandoners from every act of disobedience toward You, the dwellers in Your neighbourhood!

O Allah! Give me all of that through Your bestowal of success and Your mercy, grant us refuge from the chastisement of the burning, and give to all the Muslims, male and female, and all the faithful, male and female, the like of what I have asked for myself and my children, in the immediate of this word and the deferred of the next! Verily You are the Near, the Responder, the All- hearing, the All- knowing, the Pardoner, the Forgiving, the Clement, the Merciful! And give to us in this world good, and in the next world good, and protect us from the chastisement of the Fire! 10

دُعاءُ الإمامِ زَينِ العابِدينَ لِوُلدِهِ‏

.402الإمام زين العابدين عليه السلام مِن دعائِهِ لِوُلدِهِ‏ اللّهُمَّ ومُنَّ عَلَيَ بِبَقاءِ وُلدِي، وبِإصلاحِهِم لي، وبِإمتاعي بِهِم، إلهي امدُد لي في أعمارِهِم، وزِد لي في آجالِهِم، ورَبِّ لي صَغيرَهُم، وقَوِّ لي ضَعيفَهُم، وأصِحَّ لي أبدانَهُم وأديانَهُم وأخلاقَهُم، وعافِهِم في أنفُسِهِم وفي جَوارِحِهِم وفي كُلِّ ما عُنيتُ بِهِ مِن أمرِهِم، وأدرِر لي وعَلى يَدَيَّ أرزَاقَهُم، وَاجعَلهُم أبراراً أتقياءَ بُصَراءَ سامِعينَ مُطيعينَ لَكَ، ولِأَولِيائِكَ مُحِبِّينَ مُناصِحينَ، ولِجَميعِ أعدائِكَ مُعانِدينَ ومُبغِضينَ، آمينَ.

اللّهُمَّ اشدُد بِهِم عَضُدِي، وأقِم بِهِم أوَدي‏ ، وكَثِّر بِهِم عَدَدِي، وزَيِّن بِهِم مَحضَري، وأحيِ بِهِم ذِكري، وَاكفِنِي بِهِم في غَيبَتي، وأعِنّي بِهِم عَلى حاجَتي، وَاجعَلهُم لي‏ مُحِبِّينَ، وعَلَيَّ حَدِبينَ‏ مُقبِلينَ مُستَقيمينَ لِي، مُطيعينَ غَيرَ عاصينَ ولا عاقّينَ، ولا مُخالِفينَ ولا خاطِئينَ، وأعِنّي عَلى تَربِيَتِهِم وتَأديبِهِم وبِرِّهِم، وهَب لي مِن لَدُنكَ مَعَهُم أولادا ذُكورا، وَاجعَل ذلِكَ خَيرا لي، وَاجعَلهُم لي عَونا عَلى ما سَألتُكَ.

وأعِذني وذُرِّيَتي مِنَ الشَّيطانِ الرَّجيم، فَإِنَّكَ خَلَقتَنا وأمَرتَنا ونَهَيتَنا، ورَغَّبتَنا في ثَوابِ ما أمَرتَنا، ورَهَّبتَنا عِقابَهُ، وجَعَلتَ لَنا عَدُوّا يَكيدُنا، سَلَّطتَهُ مِنّا عَلى ما لَم تُسَلِّطنا عَلَيهِ مِنهُ، أسكَنتَهُ صُدورَنا، وأجرَيتَهُ مَجارِيَ دِمائِنا، لا يَغفُلُ إن غَفَلنا، ولا يَنسى إن نَسينا، يُؤمِنُنا عِقابَكَ ويُخَوِّفُنا بِغَيرِكَ، إن هَمَمنا بِفاحِشَةٍ شَجَّعَنا عَلَيها، وإن هَمَمنا بِعَمَلٍ صالِحٍ ثَبَّطَنا عَنهُ، يَتَعَرَّضُ لَنا بِالشَّهَواتِ، ويَنصِبُ لَنا بِالشُّبُهاتِ، إن وَعَدَنا كَذَبَنا، وإن مَنّانا أخلَفَنا، وإلّا تَصرِف عَنّا كَيدَهُ يُضِلَّنا، وإلّا تَقِنا خَبالَهُ يَستَزِلَّنا.

اللّهُمَّ فَاقهَر سُلطانَهُ عَنّا بِسُلطانِكَ، حَتّى تَحبِسَهُ عَنّا بِكَثرَةِ الدُّعاءِ لَكَ فَنُصبِحَ مِن كَيدِهِ فِي المَعصومينَ بِكَ.

اللّهُمَّ أعطِني كُلَّ سُؤلي، وَاقضِ لي حَوائِجي، ولا تَمنَعنِي الإِجابَةَ وقَد ضَمِنتَها لي، ولا تَحجُب دُعائي عَنكَ وقَد أمَرتَني بِهِ، وَامنُن عَلَيَ بِكُلِّ ما يُصلِحُني في دُنيايَ وآخِرَتي، ما ذَكَرتُ مِنهُ وما نَسيتُ، أو أظهَرتُ أو أخفَيتُ، أو أعلَنتُ أو أسرَرتُ، وَاجعَلني في جَميعِ ذلِكَ مِنَ المُصلِحينَ بِسُؤالي إيّاكَ، المُنجِحينَ بِالطَّلَبِ إلَيكَ، غَيرِ المَمنوعينَ بِالتَّوَكُّلِ عَلَيكَ، المُعَوَّدينَ بِالتّعوُّذِ بِكَ، الرّابِحينَ فِي التِّجارَةِ عَلَيكَ، المُجارينَ بِعِزِّكَ، المُوسَّعِ عَلَيهِم الرِّزقُ الحَلالُ مِن فَضلِكَ الواسِعِ بِجودِكَ وكَرَمِكَ، المُعَزِّينَ مِنَ الذُّلِّ بِكَ، وَالمُجارينَ مِنَ الظُّلمِ بِعَدلِكَ، وَالمُعافَينَ مِنَ البَلاءِ بِرَحمَتِكَ، وَالمُغنَينَ مِنَ الفَقرِ بِغِناكَ، وَالمَعصومينَ مِنَ الذُّنوبِ وَالزَّلَلِ وَالخَطاءِ بِتَقواكَ، وَالمُوَفَّقينَ لِلخَيرِ وَالرُّشدِ وَالصَّوابِ بِطاعَتِكَ، وَالمُحالِ بَينَهُم وبَينَ الذُّنوبِ بِقُدرَتِكَ، التّارِكينَ لِكُلِّ مَعصِيَتِكَ، السّاكِنينَ في جِوارِكَ.

اللّهُمَّ أعطِنا جَميعَ ذلِكَ بِتَوفيقِكَ ورَحمَتِكَ، وأعِذنا مِن عَذابِ السَّعيرِ، وأعطِ جَميعَ المُسلِمينَ وَالمُسلِماتِ وَالمُؤمِنينَ وَالمُؤمِناتِ مِثلَ الّذي سَألتُكَ لِنَفسي ولِوُلدي في عاجِلِ الدُّنيا وآجِلِ الآخِرَةِ، إنَّكَ قَريبٌ مُجيبٌ سَميعٌ عَليمٌ، عَفُوٌّ غَفورٌ رَؤوفٌ رَحِيمٌ، وآتِنا فِي الدُّنيا حَسَنَةً، وفِي الآخِرَةِ حَسَنَةً وقِنا عَذابَ النَّارِ.

A Father’s Prayer for His Child

There is a prayer narrated in Makarim al-Akhlaq by Shaikh al-Tabarsi entitled: ‘A Father’s prayer for his child’ that has been recommended to be recited by some of the great contemporary authorities in favour of improving the state of on’es children, and it is also encouraged for the mother to recite this prayer as well.

This prayer consists of four units (rak’ah). In the first unit, after reciting Surah al-Hamd, the following verse should be recited ten times:

“Our Lord make us submissive to You and show us our ways of worship, and turn to us (mercifully); for surely You are the Oft-Returning, the Most Merciful.”11

In the second unit, after reciting Surah al-Hamd, the following verse should be recited ten times:

“My Lord! Make me a performer of the prayer, and of my offspring, (too): Our Lord! And accept my petition;” “Our Lord! Forgive me and my parents, and the believers on the Day when the reckoning shall come to pass.”12

In the third unit, after reciting Surah al-Hamd, the following verse should be recited ten times:

“…Our Lord! Grant us from our wives and our offspring the joy of our eyes, and make us for the pious ones (their) Imams.”13

In the fourth unit, after reciting Surah al-Hamd, the following verse should be recited ten times:

“My Lord! Grant me that I may give thanks for Your favour which You have bestowed on me and on my parents, and that I may do good which pleases You and do good to me in respect of my offspring; surely I turn to You, and surely I am of those who submit.”14

After completely finishing this prayer, the following verse should again be recited ten times: “…Our Lord! Grant us from our wives and our offspring the joy of our eyes, and make us for the pious ones (their) Imams.”

1. .Qur’an, 25:74.

2. . Qur’an, 14:40.

3. . Qur’an, 46:15.

4. . al-Firdaws, vol. 2, p. 213, h. 3038, narrating from Ibn ‘Umar.

5. . Tarikh Asbahan, vol. 1, p. 226, h. 344. al-Firdaws, vol. 2, p. 212, h. 3037. Both narrating from ‘Anas.

6. . Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 104, p. 98, h. 70, narrating from ‘Uddah al-Da’i.

7. . Sahih Muslim, vol. 4, p. 2304, h. 3009. Sunan Abu Dawud, vol. 2, p. 88, h. 1532. Both narrating from Jabir ibn’Abdullah.

8. . Tarikh Asbahan, vol. 2, p. 296, h. 1784, narrating from ‘Abdullah ibn Dinar ibn ‘Umar.

9. . ‘Uddah al-Da’i, p. 80. Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 104, p. 99, h. 77.

10. . al-Sahifah Sajjadiyah, p. 105, Prayer 25.

11. . Qur’an, 2:128.

12. . Qur’an, 14:40-41.

13. . Qur’an, 25:74.

14. . Qur’an, 46:15.

Part 13

The Child’s Duties - The Individual Duties of a Child

1.1: Observing Discipline in the Affairs

403. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said, in his will to Hasan and Husayn after being hit by Ibn Muljam –may Allah curse him-: “I advise you both and all my children and family and all whom my will reaches to be in awe of Allah and manage your affairs.”1

النَّظمُ فِي الأُمورِ

.403الإمام عليّ عليه السلام- مِن وَصِيَّةٍ لَهُ لِلحَسَنِ وَالحُسَينِ عليهما السلام لَمّا ضَرَبَهُ ابنُ مُلجمٍ لَعَنهُ اللهُ- أُوصيكُما وجَميعَ وُلدي وأهلي ومَن بَلَغَهُ كِتابي بِتَقوَى اللهِ ونَظمِ أمرِكُم.

1.2: Cleanliness

404. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “Indeed Allah is pure and He likes the pure ones and He is clean and He likes cleanliness.”2

405. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “Cleanse yourself with anything you can, for Allah has based Islam on cleanliness.”3

406. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “Indeed Islam is clean, so be clean, for only the clean will enter Heaven.”4

407. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “It is incumbent on every Muslim to bathe himself every seven days, washing his head and his body.”5

408. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “Indeed Allah dislikes a dirty and untidy person.”6

409. Kanz al-Fawa’id: the Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.) said: “Indeed Allah dislikes a man who is al-Qadhurah.”

He was asked: “O’ Messenger of Allah! What is al-Qadhurah?”

He answered: “Someone who annoys his companions [by his dirt and bad smell].”7

410. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “He who keeps clothes should keep them clean.”8

411. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “Wash your clothes…look after yourself and clean yourself.”9

النَّظافَةُ

.404رسول الله صلى الله عليه وآله: إنَّ اللهَ طَيِّبٌ يُحِبُّ الطَّيِّبَ، نَظيفٌ يُحِبُّ النَّظافَةَ.

.405عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: تَنَظَّفوا بِكُلِّ مَا استَطَعتُم؛ فَإِنَّ اللهَ تَعالى بَنَى الإِسلامَ عَلَى النَّظافَةِ.

.406عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: إنَّ الإِسلامَ نَظيفٌ فَتَنَظَّفوا؛ فَإِنَّهُ لا يَدخُلُ الجَنَّةَ إلّا نَظيفٌ.

.407عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: حَقٌّ عَلى كُلِّ مُسلِمٍ أن يَغتَسِلَ في كُلِّ سَبعَةِ أيّامٍ يَوماً، يَغسِلُ فيهِ رَأسَهُ وجَسَدَهُ.

.408عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: إنَّ اللهَ يُبغِضُ الوَسِخَ وَالشَّعِثَ‏ .

.409كنز الفوائد عن رسول الله صلى الله عليه وآله: إنَّ اللهَ يُبغِضُ الرَّجُلَ القاذورَةَ. قيلَ: ومَا القاذورَةُ يا رَسولَ اللهِ؟ قالَ: الَّذي يَتأفَّفُ‏ بِهِ جَليسُهُ.

.410رسول الله صلى الله عليه وآله: مَنِ اتَّخَذَ ثَوباً فَليُنَظِّفهُ.

411. عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: اغسِلُوا ثِيابَكُم … وتَزَيَّنوا وتَنَظَّفوا.

1.3: Washing hands before and after Food

412. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said: “Washing the hands before and after [eating] food increases the lifespan… and it brightens the eye.”10

غَسلُ اليَدَينِ قَبلَ الطَّعامِ وبَعدَهُ‏

.412الإمام عليّ عليه السلام: غَسلُ اليَدَينِ قَبلَ الطَّعامِ وبَعدَهُ زِيادَةٌ فِي العُمُرِ … ويَجلُو البَصَرَ.

1.4: Brushing the Teeth

413. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “Brush your teeth, and make yourself clean.”11

414. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “Brush your teeth, for brushing is a great act.”12

415. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “It is of one’s nature to rinse water in the mouth and nose, and to brush your teeth.”13

416. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “Clean your gums from food and brush your teeth, and do not come to me with yellow teeth and a bad mouth odour.”14

السِّواكَ‏

.413رسول الله صلى الله عليه وآله: استاكوا وتَنَظَّفوا.

.414عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: عَلَيكُم بِالسِّواكِ، فَنِعمَ الشَّي‏ءُ السِّواكُ.

.415عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: مِنَ الفِطرَةِ المَضمَضَةُ وَالاستِنشاقُ وَالسِّواكُ.

416. عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: نَظِّفوا لَثَّاتِكُم مِنَ الطَّعامِ وَاستاكوا، ولا تَدخُلوا عَلَيَّ فُخراً بُخراً .

1.5: Washing Hands before Sleeping

417. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “He who goes to bed with oily hands and is then afflicted with something, he should not blame anyone but himself.”15

418. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “If any of you has a smelling oily hand and does not wash it before going to bed and is then afflicted with something, he should not blame anyone but himself.”16

419. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “Beware that he who goes to bed while his hands smell of fat should not blame anyone but himself.”17

غَسلُ اليَدَينِ قَبلَ النَّومِ‏

.417رسول الله صلى الله عليه وآله: مَن باتَ وفي يَدِهِ غَمَرٌ فَأَصابَهُ شَي‏ءٌ، فَلا يَلومَنَّ إلّا نَفسَهُ.

.418عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: إذا نامَ أحَدُكُم وفي يَدِهِ ريحُ غَمَرٍ فَلَم يَغسِل يَدَهُ فَأَصابَهُ شَي‏ءٌ، فَلا يَلومَنَّ إلّا نَفسَهُ.

.419عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: ألا لا يَلومَنَّ امرُؤٌ إلّا نَفسَهُ، يَبيتُ وفي يَدِهِ ريحُ غَمَرٍ.

1.6: Cutting Nails

420. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “Shortening your nails hinders the great sickness, and brings about sustenance.”18

421. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “Cut your nails, for Satan moves between the meat and the nail.”19

422. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “Cut your nails and burry them, and clean your fingers.”20

قَصُّ الأَظافيرِ

.420رسول الله صلى الله عليه وآله: تَقليمُ الأَظفارِ يَمنَعُ الدّاءَ الأَعظَمَ، ويُدِرُّ الرِّزقَ.

.421عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: قُصّوا أظافيرَكُم؛ فَإِنَّ الشَّيطانَ يَجري ما بَينَ اللَّحمِ وَالظُّفرِ.

422. عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: قُصّوا أظافيرَكُم، وَادفُنوا قُلاماتِكُم، ونَقّوا بَراجِمَكُم‏ .

1. Nahj al-Balaghah, Letter 47. Rawdah al-Wa’izin, p. 152.

2. . Sunan al-Tirmidhi, vol. 5, p. 112, h. 2799. Musnad Abu Ya’la, vol. 1, p. 368, h. 786. Both narrating from Sa’d ibn Abu Waqqas.

3. . Kanz al-Ummal, vol. 9, p. 277, h. 26002, narrating from Abu al-Sa’alik al-Tarsuni from Abu Hurayrah.

4. . Tarikh Baghdad, vol. 5, p. 143, h. 2576, narrating from ‘A’ishah.

5. . Sahih al-Bukhari, vol. 1, p. 305, h. 856. Musnad Ibn Hanbal, vol. 3, p. 246, h. 8511, with ‘incumbent upon Allah’ instead of ‘incumbent’. Both narrating from Abu Hurayrah.

6. . Shu’ab al-Iman, vol. 5, p. 168, h. 6226, narrating from ‘A’ishah. Kanz al-Ummal, vol. 6, p. 641, h. 17181.

7. . Kanz al-Fawa’id, vol. 2, p. 185. Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 80, p. 106.

8. . al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 441, h. 3, narrating from al-Sakuni from Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.). Qurb al-Isnad, p. 70.

9. . Tarikh Dimashq, vol. 36, p. 124, narrating from ‘Abdullah ibn Maymun al-Qaddah from Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) from his forefathers (a.s.). Kanz al-Ummal, vol. 6, p. 640, h. 17175.

10. . al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 290, h. 3, narrating from Abu Basir from Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.).

11. . al-Musannif by Ibn Abu Shaybah, vol. 1, p. 197, h. 25, narrating from Sulayman ibn Sa’id. al-Mu’jam al-Awsat, vol. 7, p. 259, h. 7442, narrating from Sulayman ibn Ñard.

12. . Kanz al-Ummal, vol. 9, p. 314, h. 26183. Jami’ al-Saghir, vol. 2, p. 169, h. 5531. Both narrating from ‘Abd al-Jabbar al-Khulani in Tarikh Dariyya from ‘Anas.

13. . Sunan Ibn Majah, vol. 1, p. 107, h. 294. al-Sunan al-Kubra, vol. 1, p. 88, h. 242. Both narrating from ‘Ammar ibn Yasir.

14. . Kanz al-Ummal, vol. 6, p. 655, h. 17239, narrating from al-Hakim from ‘Abdullah ibn Kathir.

15. . Sunan al-Tirmidhi, vol. 4, p. 289, h. 1859. Musnad Ibn Hanbal, vol. 3, p. 251, h. 8539. Both narrating from Abu Hurayrah.

16. . Sunan Ibn Majah, vol. 2, p. 1096, h. 3297, narrating from Abu Hurayrah.

17. . Sunan Ibn Majah, vol. 2, p. 1096, h. 3296, narrating from Imam al-Husayn (a.s.) from his mother Fatimah (a.s.). Kanz al-Ummal, vol. 15, p. 242, h. 40759, narrating from it.

18. . al-Kafi, vol. 6, p. 490, h. 1, narrating from al-Hasan ibn Rashid. Thawab al-A’mal, p. 42, h. 4, narrating from Abu Basir. Jami’ al-Akhbar, p. 334, h. 943. Both narrating from Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) from his forefathers (a.s.) from the Prophet (S.a.w.), with ‘increases sustenance’ instead of ‘and brings about sustenance’. al-Khisal, p. 611, h. 10, narrating from Abu Basir and Muhammad ibn Muslim from Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) from his forefathers (a.s.). Tuhaf al-’Uqul, p. 101. Both narrating from Imam ‘Ali (a.s.). Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 76, p. 119, h. 2.

19. . Tarikh Dimashq, vol. 53, p. 247, h. 11237. al-Firdaws, vol. 2, p. 168, h. 2843. Both narrating from Jabir ibn ‘Abdullah al-Ansari.

20. . Tafsir al-Qurtubi, vol. 2, p. 102, narrating from ‘Abdullah ibn Bishr al-Mazini. Kanz al-Ummal, vol. 6, p. 655, h. 17239.

Part 14

The Children’s Duties Towards their Parents

2.1: The Importance of the Rights of Parents

“And We have enjoined on man goodness unto his parents; and if they strive with you that you should associate (others) with Me, of which you have no knowledge, then do not obey them, unto Me is your return, and I will inform you of what you were doing.”1

“And We have enjoined on men doing of good to his parents, with trouble did his mother bear him and with trouble did she bring him forth; and the bearing of him and the weaning of him was thirty months; until when he attains his maturity and reaches forty years, he says: ‘My Lord! Grant me that I may give thanks for Your favour which You have bestowed on me and on my parents, and that I may do good which pleases You and do good to me in respect of my offspring; surely I turn to You, and surely I am of those who submit.”2

“And We did enjoin upon man concerning his parents, did his mother bear him with fainting upon fainting and his weaning takes two years, (saying:)’Be grateful to Me and to your parents: unto Me is the ultimate return (of all).”3

423. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said, when he was sked about the rights of the parents upon their child: “They are your Heaven and your Hell.”4

424. Sahih al-Bukhari, narrating from ‘Abdullah ibn Mas’ud who said: “I asked the Prophet (s.a.w.): “What is Allah’s most beloved act?”

He answered: “Performing prayers at its due time.”

I said: “What else?”

He said: “Obedience to parents.”5

425. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “The content of the Lord lies in the content of father and the wrath of the Lord is in the wrath of the father.”6

426. Imam al-Sajjad said, from his supplication to his parents: “O Allah! Make me fear them like one’s fear of a tyrant king, and that I do good to them like the goodness of a kind mother, and make my obedience to my parents and my kindness to them sweeter for my eyes than sleepy eyes, and cooler for my breast than the drink of a thirsty person so that I put their desire ahead of mine.”7

427. Imam al-Baqir (a.s.) said: “There are three things in which Allah has not given anyone permission to violate: returning a trust to the righteous person and the corrupt, fulfilling a promise given to both the righteous person and the corrupt, and obedience to parents whether they are righteous or corrupt.”8

428. Imam al-Ridha (a.s.) said: “Indeed Allah…has commanded to thank the Lord and the parents. So, he who is not thankful to his parents is not thankful to Allah.”9

أهَمِّيَّةُ حُقوقِ الوالِدَينِ‏

)وَ وَصَّيْنَا الْإِنْسانَ بِوالِدَيْهِ حُسْناً وَ إِنْ جاهَداكَ لِتُشْرِكَ بِي ما لَيْسَ لَكَ بِهِ عِلْمٌ فَلا تُطِعْهُما إِلَيَّ مَرْجِعُكُمْ فَأُنَبِّئُكُمْ بِما كُنْتُمْ تَعْمَلُون.(

)وَ وَصَّيْنَا الْإِنْسانَ بِوالِدَيْهِ إِحْساناً حَمَلَتْهُ أُمُّهُ كُرْهاً وَ وَضَعَتْهُ كُرْهاً وَ حَمْلُهُ وَ فِصالُهُ ثَلاثُونَ شَهْراً حَتَّى إِذا بَلَغَ أَشُدَّهُ وَ بَلَغَ أَرْبَعِينَ سَنَةً قالَ رَبِّ أَوْزِعْنِي أَنْ أَشْكُرَ نِعْمَتَكَ الَّتِي أَنْعَمْتَ عَلَيَّ وَ عَلى‏ والِدَيَّ وَ أَنْ أَعْمَلَ صالِحاً تَرْضاهُ وَ أَصْلِحْ لِي فِي ذُرِّيَّتِي إِنِّي تُبْتُ إِلَيْكَ وَ إِنِّي مِنَ الْمُسْلِمِين.(

)وَ وَصَّيْنَا الْإِنْسانَ بِوالِدَيْهِ حَمَلَتْهُ أُمُّهُ وَهْناً عَلى‏ وَهْنٍ وَ فِصالُهُ فِي عامَيْنِ أَنِ اشْكُرْ لِي وَ لِوالِدَيْكَ إِلَيَّ الْمَصِير.(

.423رسول الله صلى الله عليه وآله- لَمّا سُئِلَ عَن حَقِّ الوالِدَينِ عَلى وَلَدِهِما- هُما جَنَّتُكَ ونارُكَ.

.424صحيح البخاري عن عبد الله: سَأَلتُ النَّبِيَّ صلى الله عليه وآله: أيُّ العَمَلِ أحَبُّ إلَى اللهِ؟

قالَ: الصَّلاةُ عَلى وَقتِها.

قالَ: ثُمَّ أيُّ؟

قالَ: ثُمَّ بِرُّ الوالِدَينِ.

.425رسول الله صلى الله عليه وآله: رِضَا الرَّبِّ في رِضَا الوالِدِ، وسَخَطُ الرَّبِّ في سَخَطِ الوالِدِ.

.426الإمام زين العابدين عليه السلام- مِن دُعائِهِ لِأَبوَيهِ- اللّهُمَّ اجعَلني أهابُهُما هَيبَةَ السُّلطانِ العَسوفِ‏ ، وأبَرُّهُما بِرَّ الامِّ الرَّؤوفِ، وَاجعَل طاعَتي لِوالِدَيَّ وبِرِّي بِهِما أقَرَّ لِعَينَيَّ مِن رَقدَةِ الوَسنانِ، وأثلَجَ لِصَدري مِن شَربَةِ الظَّمآنِ؛ حَتّى اوثِرَ عَلى هَوايَ هَواهُما.

.427الإمام الباقر عليه السلام: ثَلاثٌ لَم يَجعَلِ اللهُ عزّ وجل لِأَحَدٍ فيهِنَّ رُخصَةً: أداءُ الأَمانَةِ إلَى البَرِّ وَالفاجِرِ، وَالوَفاءُ بِالعَهدِ لِلبَرِّ وَالفاجِرِ، وبِرُّ الوالِدَينِ بَرَّينِ كانا أو فاجِرَينِ.

428. الإمام الرضا عليه السلام: إنَّ اللهَ عزّ وجل … أمَرَ بِالشُّكرِ لَهُ ولِلوالِدَينِ، فَمَن لَم يَشكُر والِدَيهِ لَم يَشكُرِ اللهَ.

2.2: The Rights of Parents

A) Doing Good

“And your Lord has commanded that you worship none but Him and (to show) kindness to parents, if one of them or both of them reach old age with you, do not say to them ‘fie’, nor repulse them, and speak to them a gracious word. And out of compassion, lower unto them the wing of humility, and say: ‘My Lord! Have mercy on them both as they cherished me when I was little.”10

“And (He has made me) kind to my mother, and He has not made me arrogant unblessed. And peace be on me the day I was born, and the day I die, and the day I shall be raised alive.”11

Describing Yahya:

“And kindness to his parents and (unto the people) he was neither insolent (nor) disobedient. And peace on him the day he was born, and the day he dies, and the day he shall be raised a live!”12

429. Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) said, in concerning Allah’s saying: “… And (to show) kindness to parents, …”: Showing kindness is that you be good company for them and that you should not make them ask you for something they need from you even if they are rich.”13 14

430. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said: “Showing kindness to parents is the greatest obligation.”15

431. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said: “Showing kindness to parents is the most exalted of qualities.”16

حُقوقُ الوالِدَينِ‏

الإحسانُ‏

)وَ قَضى‏ رَبُّكَ أَلَّا تَعْبُدُوا إِلَّا إِيَّاهُ وَ بِالْوالِدَيْنِ إِحْساناً إِمَّا يَبْلُغَنَّ عِنْدَكَ الْكِبَرَ أَحَدُهُما أَوْ كِلاهُما فَلا تَقُلْ لَهُما أُفٍّ وَ لا تَنْهَرْهُما وَ قُلْ لَهُما قَوْلًا كَرِيماً* وَ اخْفِضْ لَهُما جَناحَ الذُّلِّ مِنَ الرَّحْمَةِ وَ قُلْ رَبِّ ارْحَمْهُما كَما رَبَّيانِي صَغِيرا.(

]نقلا عن عيسى‏] (وَ بَرًّا بِوالِدَتِي وَ لَمْ يَجْعَلْنِي جَبَّاراً شَقِيًّا* وَ السَّلامُ عَلَيَّ يَوْمَ وُلِدْتُ وَ يَوْمَ أَمُوتُ وَ يَوْمَ أُبْعَثُ حَيًّا.(

]في صفة يحيى‏] )وَ بَرًّا بِوالِدَيْهِ وَ لَمْ يَكُنْ جَبَّاراً عَصِيًّا* وَ سَلامٌ عَلَيْهِ يَوْمَ وُلِدَ وَ يَوْمَ يَمُوتُ وَ يَوْمَ يُبْعَثُ حَيًّا.(

.429الإمام الصادق عليه السلام- في قَولِهِ تَعالى: (وَ بِالْوالِدَيْنِ إِحْساناً)- الإحسانُ أن تُحسِنَ صُحبَتَهُما، وألّا تُكَلِّفَهُما أن يَسألاكَ شَيئا مِمّا يَحتاجانِ إلَيهِ وإن كانا مُستَغنِيَينِ‏ .

.430الإمام عليّ عليه السلام: بِرُّ الوالِدَينِ أكبَرُ فَريضَةٍ.

.431عنه عليه السلام: بِرُّ الوالِدَينِ مِن أكرَمِ الطَّبائِعِ.

B) Standing up to Show Reverence
432. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said: “Stand up for your father and your teacher, even if you are a commander.”17

القِيامُ تَعظيماً

.432الإمام عليّ عليه السلام: قُم عَن مَجلِسِكَ لِأَبيكَ ومُعَلِّمِكَ وإن كُنتَ أميراً.

C) Submissiveness at the Time of Anger
433. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “Among the rights of a father upon his child is that the child should be submissive to him at the time of anger and exhaustion.”18

الخُضوعُ عِندَ الغَضَبِ‏

.433رسول الله صلى الله عليه وآله: مِن حَقِّ الوالِدِ على وَلَدِهِ أن يَخضَعَ لَهُ في الغَضَبِ وَالتَّعَبِ.

D) Avoiding Disobedience
434. Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) said, regarding Allah’s saying “…if one of them or both of them reach old age with you…”: “If they annoy you, do not show your inconvenience and if they were to hit you, do not shout at them and be harsh at them.”19

435. Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) said: “The lowest degree of disobedience [to parents] is to say ‘fie’, and if Allah had anything of a word less than this, He would have prohibited it.”20

436. Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) said, regarding Allah’s saying “And out of compassion, lower unto them the wing of humility…”: “Do not use your eyes in looking at them other with a glance of compassion and sympathy to them, do not raise your voice louder than their voice, do not extend your hand higher than their hands, and do not precede them in steps.”21

437. Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) said, regarding Allah’s saying “…and speak to them a gracious word.”: “If they were to hit you, say to them: ‘May Allah forgive you!”22

438. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “It will be said to he who is disobedient to his parents: “Worship as much as you desire, but I will not forgive you.”23

439. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “He who makes his parents unhappy has surely disobeyed them.”24

440. Sahih Muslim, narrating from ‘Abdullah ibn ‘Amr ibn al-‘As who said: “The Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.) said: “Among the major sins is swearing at one’s own parents.”

Some people said: “O Messenger of Allah! Can someone really swear at his own parents?”

He answered: “Yes, in a manner that someone swears at another person’s father, and so he swears back at his father, or someone swears at another person’s mother, and he swears back at his mother.”25

441. Imam al-Baqir (a.s.) said: “My father saw a man whose son was walking with him and the son was leaning on his father’s arm. My father being annoyed of the son did not speak to him until he left this world.”26

442. Imam al-’Askari (a.s.) said: “The boldness of a child in his childhood against his father will invite to his disobedience in his adult age.”27

التَّجَنُّبُ مِنَ العُقوقِ‏

.434الإمام الصادق عليه السلام- في قَولِهِ تَعالى: (إِمَّا يَبْلُغَنَّ عِنْدَكَ الْكِبَرَ … )- إن أضجَراكَ فَلا تَقُل لَهُما: افٍّ، ولا تَنهَرهُما إن ضَرَباكَ.

.435عنه عليه السلام: أدنَى العُقوقِ: «افٍّ»، ولَو عَلِمَ اللهُ شَيئاً أهوَنَ مِنهُ لَنَهى عَنهُ.

.436عنه عليه السلام- في قَولِهِ تَعالى: (وَ اخْفِضْ لَهُما جَناحَ الذُّلِّ مِنَ الرَّحْمَةِ)- لا تَملأَ عَينَيكَ مِنَ النَّظَرِ إلَيهِما إلّا بِرَحمَةٍ ورِقَّةٍ، ولا تَرفَع صَوتَكَ فَوقَ أصواتِهِما، ولا يَدَكَ فَوقَ أيديهِما، ولا تَقَدَّم قُدّامَهُما.

.437عنه عليه السلام- في قَولِهِ تَعالى: (وَ قُلْ لَهُما قَوْلًا كَرِيماً)- إن ضَرَباكَ فَقُل لَهُما: غَفَرَ اللهُ لَكُما.

.438رسول الله صلى الله عليه وآله: يُقالُ لِلعاقِّ: اعمَل ما شِئتَ مِنَ الطّاعَةِ فَإنّي لا أغفِرُ لَكَ.

.439عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: مَن أحزَنَ والِدَيهِ فَقَد عَقَّهُما.

.440صحيح مسلم عن عبد الله بن عمرو بن العاص: أنَّ رَسولَ اللهِ صلى الله عليه وآله قالَ: مِن الكَبائِرِ شَتمُ الرَّجُلِ والِدَيهِ.

قالوا: يا رَسولَ اللهِ وهَل يَشتِمُ الرَّجُلُ والِدَيهِ؟

قالَ: نَعَم، يَسُبُّ أبَا الرَّجُلِ فَيَسُبُّ أباهُ، ويَسُبُّ امَّهُ فَيَسُبُّ امَّهُ.

.441الإمام الباقر عليه السلام: إنَّ أبي نَظَرَ إلى رَجُلٍ ومَعَهُ ابنُهُ يَمشي، وَالابنُ مُتَّكِئٌ عَلى ذِراعِ الأَبِ، قالَ: فَما كَلَّمَهُ أبي عليه السلام مَقتاً لَهُ حَتّى فارَقَ الدُّنيا.

442. الإمام العسكريّ عليه السلام: جُرأَةُ الوَلَدِ عَلى والِدِهِ في صِغَرِهِ، تَدعو إلَى العُقوقِ في كِبَرِهِ.

2.3: General Rights of Parents

443. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said, when asked about the rights of parents upon their child: “He should not call his father by his name; he should not walk in front of him; he should not sit before him; and he should not be the cause of his father getting sworn at.”28

444. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said: “There is a right for the child upon his father and there is a right for the father upon the child. The right of the father upon the child is that the child obeys him in everything other than sinning Allah.”29

445. Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) said: “Parents have three rights upon their child: to be grateful to the parents in any condition, to obey them in whatever they order him or prohibit him except sinning Allah, and in seeking benevolence for them in secret and publically.”30

جَوامِعُ حُقوقِ الوالِدَينِ‏

.443رسول الله صلى الله عليه وآله- لَمّا سُئِلَ عَن حَقِّ الوالِدِ عَلى وَلَدِهِ- لا يُسَمِّيهِ بِاسمِهِ، ولا يَمشِي بَينَ يَدَيهِ، ولا يَجلِسُ قَبلَهُ، ولا يَستَسِبُّ لَهُ‏ .

.444الإمام عليّ عليه السلام: إنَّ لِلوَلَدِ عَلَى الوالِدِ حَقّاً، وإنَّ لِلوالِدِ عَلَى الوَلَدِ حَقّاً، فَحَقُّ الوالِدِ عَلَى الوَلَدِ أن يُطيعَهُ في كُلِّ شَي‏ءٍ إلّا في مَعصيَةِ اللهِ سُبحانَهُ.

.445الإمام الصادق عليه السلام: يَجِبُ لِلوالِدَينِ عَلَى الوَلَدِ ثَلاثَةُ أشياءَ: شُكرُهُما عَلى كُلِّ حالٍ، وطاعَتُهُما فيما يَأمُرانِهِ ويَنهَيانِهِ عَنهُ في غَيرِ مَعصيَةِ اللهِ، ونَصيحَتُهُما فِي السِّرِّ وَالعَلانِيَةِ.

2.4: The Benefits of Doing Good to Parents

446. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “He who wishes to prolong his lifespan and increase his sustenance should do good his parents and keep ties with his kin.”31

447. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “The master of the righteous on Judgment Day is he who does good to his parents after their death.”32

448. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “Blissful is he who does good to his parents, and Allah will increase his lifespan.”33

449. Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) said: “Do good to your parents so that your children will do good to you.”34

برَكاتُ بِرِّ الوالِدَينِ‏

.446رسول الله صلى الله عليه وآله: مَن سَرَّهُ أن يُمَدَّ لَهُ في عُمُرِهِ ويُزادَ لَهُ في رِزقِهِ؛ فَليَبَرَّ والِدَيهِ، وليَصِل رَحِمَهُ.

.447عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: سَيِّدُ الأبرارِ يَومَ القِيامَةِ رَجُلٌ بَرَّ والِدَيهِ بَعدَ مَوتِهِما.

.448عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: مَن بَرَّ والِدَيهِ طوبى‏ لَهُ، زادَ اللهُ في عُمُرِهِ.

.449الإمام الصادق عليه السلام: بَرُّوا آباءَكُم؛ يَبَرَّكُم أبناؤُكُم.

1. Qur’an, 29:8.

2. . Qur’an, 46:15.

3. . Qur’an, 31:14.

4. . Sunan Ibn Majah, vol. 2, p. 1208, h. 3662, narrating from Abu Umamah. Kanz al-Ummal, vol. 16, p. 463, h. 45453, narrating from it.

5. . Sahih al-Bukhari, vol. 1, p. 197, h. 504. Sahih Muslim, vol. 1, p. 90, h. 139 and p. 89, h. 137, with ‘the best’ instead of ‘most beloved’. Both narrating from ‘Abdullah ibn Mas’ud.

6. . Sunan al-Tirmidhi, vol. 4, p. 311, h. 1899. al-Mustadrak ‘ala al-Sahihain, vol. 4, p. 168, h. 7249. Both narrating from ‘Abdullah ibn ‘Amr.

7. . al-Sahifah Sajjadiyah, p. 102, Supplication 24.

8. . al-Kafi, vol. 2, p. 162, h. 15, narrating from ‘Anbasah ibn Mus’ab, and vol. 5, p. 132, h. 1. Tahdhib al-Ahkam, vol. 6, p. 350, h. 988, with ‘there is no excuse for anyone in it’ instead of ‘has not given…permission’. Both narrating from al-Husayn ibn Mus’ab al-Hamadani from Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.).

9. . al-Khisal, p. 156, h. 196. ‘Uyun Akhbar al-Ridha (a.s.), vol. 1, p. 258, h. 13. Both narrating from al-Dilhath.

10. . Qur’an, 17:23-24.

11. . Qur’an, 19:32-33.

12. . Qur’an, 19:14-15.

13. . It means that you should provide them what they need before they ask.

14. . al-Kafi, vol. 2, p. 157, h. 1, narrating from Abu Wallad al-Hannat. Mishkat al-Anwar, p. 282, h. 854.

15. . Ghurar al-Hikam, h. 4423. ‘Uyun al-Hikam wa al-Mawa’iz, p. 195, h. 3982.

16. . Dastur Ma’alim al-Hikam, p. 23. Tuhaf al-’Uqul, p. 85, with ‘the virtue of the nature [of a person]’ insead of ‘the most exalted of qualities’. Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 77, p. 212, h. 1.

17. . Ghurar al-Hikam, h. 2341.

18. . Tarikh Madinah al-Munawarah, vol. 2, p. 568, narrating from Ibn ‘Abbas. Kanz al-Ummal, vol. 16, p. 473, h. 45512, narrating from Tarikh Dimashq.

19. . al-Kafi, vol. 2, p. 158, h. 1. Kitab Man la Yahdarhu al-Faqih, vol. 4, p. 408, h. 5883. Both narrating from Abu Wallad al-Hannat

20. . al-Kafi, vol. 2, p. 348, h. 1, narrating from Hadid ibn Hakim. ‘Uyun Akhbar al-Ridha (a.s.), vol. 2, p. 44, h. 160, narrating from Dawud ibn Sulayman al-Farra’ from Imam al-Ridha (a.s.) from his forefathers (a.s.).

21. . al-Kafi, vol. 2, p. 158, h. 1. Kitab Man la Yahdarhu al-Faqih, vol. 4, p. 408, h. 5883. Both narrating from Abu Wallad al-Hannat

22. . al-Kafi, vol. 2, p. 158, h. 1. Kitab Man la Yahdarhu al-Faqih, vol. 4, p. 408, h. 5883. Both narrating from Abu Wallad al-Hannat

23. . Hilyah al-Awliya’, vol. 10, p. 216, narrating from ‘A’ishah. Rawdah al-Wa’izin, p. 403.

24. . Kitab Man la Yahdarhu al-Faqih, vol. 4, p. 372, h. 5762, narrating from Hammad ibn ‘Amr and ‘Anas ibn Muhammad from his father from Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) from his forefathers (a.s.). al-Khisal, p. 621, h. 10, narrating from Abu Basir and Muhammad ibn Muslim from Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) from his forefathers (a.s.) from Imam ‘Ali (a.s.).

25. . Sahih Muslim, vol. 1, p. 92, h. 146. al-Sunan al-Kubra, vol. 10, p. 397, h. 21086.

26. . al-Kafi, vol. 2, p. 349, h. 8, narrating from ‘Abdullah ibn Sulayman. Mishkat al-Anwar, p. 285, h. 862, narrating from ‘Abdullah ibn Muskan, without ‘was walking’.

27. . Tuhaf al-’Uqul, p. 489.

28. . al-Kafi, vol. 2, p. 158, h. 5, narrating from Durust ibn Abu Mansur. Mishkat al-Anwar, p. 277, h. 833. Both narrating from Imam al-Kazim (a.s.).

29. . Nahj al-Balaghah, Wise Saying 399.

30. . Tuhaf al-’Uqul, p. 322. Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 78, p. 236, h. 67.

31. . Musnad Ibn Hanbal, vol. 4, p. 530, h. 13812 and p. 458, h. 13400. Makarim al-Akhlaq by Ibn Abu al-Dunya, p. 178, h. 244, with ‘he who loves’ instead of ‘he who wishes’. All narrating from ‘Anas.

32. . Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 74, p. 86, h. 100, narrating from the book al-Imamah wa al-Tabsirah from al-Sakuni from Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) from his forefathers (a.s.).

33. . al-Adab al-Mufrad, p. 20, h. 22. al-Mustadrak ‘ala al-Sahihain, vol. 4, p. 170, h. 7257. Both narrating from Ma’Ádh.

34. . al-Kafi, vol. 5, p. 554, h. 5, narrating from ‘Ubaid ibn Zurarah. Kitab Man la Yahdarhu al-Faqih, vol. 4, p. 21, h. 4985.

Part 15

The Child’s Duties Towards His Teacher

3.1: Obedience

450. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “He whom you learn one word from, has made you become his servant.”1

451. ‘Awali al-La’ali: It is narrated that the Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.) said: “He who teaches something to someone owns him.”

It was said: “O Messenger of Allah! Can he sell him?”

He (s.a.w.) answered: “No. But he can command him and forbid him.”2

الإطاعَةُ

.450رسول الله صلى الله عليه وآله: مَن تَعَلَّمتَ مِنهُ حَرفاً، صِرتَ لَهُ عَبداً.

.451عوالي اللالي: رُوِيَ عَنِ النَّبِيِّ صلى الله عليه وآله أنَّهُ قالَ: مَن عَلَّمَ شَخصاً مَسأَلَةً، فَقَد مَلَكَ رَقَبَتَهُ. فَقيلَ لَهُ يا رَسولَ اللهِ: أيَبيعُهُ؟ فَقالَ صلى الله عليه وآله: لا، ولكِن يَأمُرُهُ ويَنهاهُ.

3.2: Honouring

452. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said: “Honour your guest even if he is menial, and stand up for your father and your teacher even if you are a commander.”3

453. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said: “There are three things of which you should not be ashamed of: A man serving his guest, standing up for his father and his teacher, and demanding his right even if it is little.”4

454. Imam al-Sajjad (a.s.) said: “The right of your teacher is to honour him, revere his presence, listen to him carefully and heed him. You must not raise your voice over him, not answer a person who has asked him until he himself answers, not speak with anyone in his meeting, and you should not backbite anyone in his presence. You should defend him when someone speaks against him, you should conceal his defects and reveal his virtues, and you should not associate with his enemy and not be hostile with his friend. If you were to do this, the angels of Allah will bear witness for you that you have gone to him and you have learnt his knowledge for the sake of Allah the Exalted, and not for the sake of people.”5

التَّعظيمُ‏

.452الإمام عليّ عليه السلام: أكرِم ضَيفَكَ وإن كانَ حَقيرا، وقُم عَن مَجلِسِكَ لِأبيكَ ومُعَلِّمِكَ وإن كُنتَ أميرا.

.453عنه عليه السلام: ثَلاثٌ لا يُستَحيى مِنهُنَّ: خِدمَةُ الرَّجُلِ ضَيفَهُ، وقِيامُهُ عَن مَجلِسِهِ لِأَبيهِ ومُعَلِّمِهِ، وطَلَبُ الحَقِّ وإن قَلَّ.

.454الإمام زين العابدين عليه السلام: حَقُّ سائِسِكَ بِالعِلمِ التَّعظيمُ لَهُ، وَالتَّوقيرُ لِمَجلِسِهِ، وحُسنُ الاستِماعِ إلَيهِ، وَالإِقبالُ عَلَيهِ، وألّا تَرفَعَ عَلَيهِ صَوتَكَ، ولا تُجيبَ أحَداً يَسأَلُهُ عَن‏ شَي‏ءٍ حَتّى يَكونَ هُوَ الَّذي يُجيبُ، ولا تُحَدِّثَ في مَجلِسِهِ أحَداً، ولا تَغتابَ عِندَهُ أحَداً، وأن تَدفَعَ عَنهُ إذا ذُكِرَ عِندَكَ بِسوءٍ، وأن تَستُرَ عُيوبَهُ وتُظهِرَ مَناقِبَهُ، ولا تُجالِسَ لَهُ عَدُوّاً ولا تُعادِيَ لَهُ وَلِيّا، فَإِذا فَعَلتَ ذلِكَ شَهِدَت لَكَ مَلائِكَةُ اللهِ عزّ وجل بِأَنَّكَ قَصَدتَهُ، وتَعَلَّمتَ عِلمَهُ للهِ جَلَّ وعَزَّ اسمُهُ لا لِلنّاسِ.

3.3: Lowering the Voice

“Surely those who lower their voice before Allah’s Apostle are they whose hearts Allah has proved for guarding (against evil); they shall have forgiveness and a great reward.”6

455. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “He who lowers his voice in the presence of the scholars will come forth on Judgment Day with my companions whose hearts have been tested with piety by Allah, and there is no goodness in flattery and humility except for that which is done for Allah for the sake of seeking knowledge.”7

غَضُّ الصَّوتِ‏

)إِنَّ الَّذِينَ يَغُضُّونَ أَصْواتَهُمْ عِنْدَ رَسُولِ اللَّهِ أُولئِكَ الَّذِينَ امْتَحَنَ اللَّهُ قُلُوبَهُمْ لِلتَّقْوى‏ لَهُمْ مَغْفِرَةٌ وَ أَجْرٌ عَظِيم.(

455. رسول الله صلى الله عليه وآله: مَن غَضَّ صَوتَهُ عِندَ العُلَماءِ جاءَ يَومَ القِيامَةِ مَعَ الَّذينَ امتَحَنَ اللهُ قُلوبَهُم لِلتَّقوى مِن أصحابي، ولا خَيرَ فِي التَّمَلُّقِ وَالتَّواضُعِ إلّا ما كانَ فِي اللهِ في طَلَبِ العِلمِ.

3.4: Avoidance of Belittling

456. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “There are three groups who are not belittled by any one except a hypocrite whose hypocrisy is manifest: the owner of grey hair in Islam [an elder], a teacher of goodness and a just leader.”8

457. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “He who humiliates a person of knowledge has indeed humiliated me and he who humiliates me is a disbeliever.”9

458. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.): “No one belittles knowledge and knowledgeable people except one who is foolish and ignorant.”10

459. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said: “Be careful not to belittle scholars, for this action will make yourself belittled, and it will bring suspicion to you and negative views about you.”11

460. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said: “Do not use the sharpness of your tongue against he who has taught you to speak, or use the eloquence of your speech against he who has disciplined you.”12

التَّجَنُّبُ عَنِ الاستِخفافِ‏

.456رسول الله صلى الله عليه وآله: ثَلاثَةٌ لا يَستَخِفُّ بِهِم إلّا مُنافِقٌ بَيِّنٌ نِفاقُهُ: ذو شَيبَةٍ فِي الإِسلامِ، ومُعَلِّمُ الخَيرِ، وإمامٌ عادِلٌ.

.457عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: مَنِ احتَقَرَ صاحِبَ العِلمِ فَقَدِ احتَقَرَني، ومَنِ احتَقَرَني فَهُوَ كافِرٌ.

.458الإمام عليّ عليه السلام: لا يَستَخِفُّ بِالعِلمِ وأهلِهِ إلّا أحمَقُ جاهِلٌ.

.459عنه عليه السلام: إيّاكَ أن تَستَخِفَّ بِالعُلَماءِ؛ فَإِنَّ ذلِكَ يُزري بِكَ، ويُسي‏ءُ الظَّنَّ بِكَ وَالمَخيلَةَ فيكَ.

.460عنه عليه السلام: لا تَجعَلَنَّ ذَرَبَ‏ لِسانِكَ عَلى مَن أنطَقَكَ، وبَلاغَةَ قَولِكَ عَلى مَن سَدَّدَكَ.

1. ‘Awali al-La’ali, vol. 1, p. 292, h. 163. Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 77, p. 165, h. 2.

2. . ‘Awali al-La’ali, vol. 4, p. 71, h. 43. Munyah al-Murid, p. 243.

3. . Ghurar al-Hikam, h. 2341.

4. . Ghurar al-Hikam, h. 4666. ‘Uyun al-Hikam wa al-Mawa’iz, p. 212, h. 4230.

5. . Kitab Man la Yahdarhu al-Faqih, vol. 2, p. 620, h. 3214. al-Khisal, p. 567, h. 1. Both narrating from Abu Hamzah al-Thumali (Thabit ibn Dinar). Tuhaf al-’Uqul, p. 260.

6. . Qur’an, 49:3.

7. . Firdaws al-Akhbar, vol. 4, p. 181, h. 6076, narrating from Sa’id al-Shami.

8. . Tarikh Baghdad, vol. 8, p. 27, h. 4074. Usd al-Ghabah, vol. 6, p. 354, h. 6439. Both narrating from ‘Amarah al-Qurashi from his father from his grandfather.

9. . Irshad al-Qulub, p. 165.

10. . Ghurar al-Hikam, h. 10807, ‘Uyun al-Hikam wa al-Mawa’iz, p. 541, h. 10030.

11. . Ghurar al-Hikam, h. 2732. ‘Uyun al-Hikam wa al-Mawa’iz, p. 100, h. 2298.

12. . Nahj al-Balaghah, Wise Saying 411. Ghurar al-Hikam, h. 10385.

Part 16

The Child’s Duties Towards Elders and Friends

4.1: Initiating with Greeting

461. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “The younger person should greet the elder, the one passing by should greet the one who is sitting, and a small group should greet the large group.”1

462. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “The nearest person to Allah and His Messenger is he who initiates with greeting.”2

463. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “The most obedient of you to Allah is he who initiates greeting his friend.”3

464. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said: “Greeting has seventy rewards, sixty nine of which are for he who initiates the greeting and one is for the responder.”4

البَدءُ بِالسَّلامِ‏

.461رسول الله صلى الله عليه وآله: يُسَلِّمُ الصَّغيرُ عَلَى الكَبيرِ، والمَارُّ عَلَى القاعِدِ، وَالقَليلُ عَلَى الكَثيرِ.

.462عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: أولَى النّاسِ بِاللهِ وبِرَسولِهِ مَن بَدَأ بِالسَّلامِ.

.463عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: أطوَعُكُم للهِ الذي يَبدَأُ صاحِبَهُ بالسَّلامِ.

464. الإمام عليّ عليه السلام: لِلسّلامِ سَبعونَ حَسَنَةً؛ تِسعٌ وَسِتُّونَ للمُبتَدِئ وواحِدَةٌ للرّادِ.

4.2:Observing Rights

465. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said, in his advice to Muhammad ibn al-Hanafiyah: “O my child! Do not encroach upon the right of your brother because of what is between you and him, because he whose rights you breach is not your brother.”5

466. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said: “How bad is it for a man, whom his brother recognizes his rights but he does not recognize the rights of his brother.”6

رِعايَةُ الحُقوقِ‏

.465الإمام عليّ عليه السلام- في وَصِيَّتِهِ لِابنِهِ مُحَمَّدِ بنِ الحَنَفِيَّةِ- يا بُنَيَّ … لا تُضَيِّعَنَّ حَقَّ أخيكَ اتِّكالًا عَلَى ما بَينَكَ وبَينَهُ؛ فَإِنَّهُ لَيسَ لَكَ بِأَخٍ مَن أضَعتَ حَقَّهُ.

466. عنه عليه السلام: ما أقبَحَ بِالرَّجُلِ أن يَعرِفَ أخوهُ حَقَّهُ، ولا يَعرِفَ حَقَّ أخيهِ!

An Explanation About a Child Greeting Elders

Based on the traditions mentioned on the manner of raising children, one of the upbringing methods of the Prophet of Allah (s.a.w.) was greeting children. He has explicitly said that by this behaviour he wanted this custom to continue in the society. He (s.a.w.) said: “There are five things which I do not abandon till I die and (one of them) is greeting children so that it can remain a custom after me.”7

However, it can be gathered from the traditions narrated in this chapter that all Muslims should precede each other in greeting, especially it being the duty of the young greeting the elder.

Little contemplation will clarify that these narrations are not in conflict, but they are complementary to each other and it is best to practice all of them.

This means that the duty of every person in the Islamic society is to precede in the greeting, but etiquette requires that the younger greet the older, but if for any reason the younger person delays or hesitates to greet the elder one, the elder has an upbringing duty to greet the younger one and thereby making him understand his shortcomings and faults. This action, especially in respect to children, has a better upbringing effect, and this is why the Prophet of Islam (s.a.w.) used to greet the children in order to attract the attention of his followers to the upbringing effects of honouring the personality of the child and respecting his feelings.

4.3: Taking the Elders as Examples

467. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said: “The young among you should take example of your elders, and the elders should be affectionate to the young ones. You should not be like the crude men of the Age of Ignorance who neither had the understanding of religion nor did they contemplate about Allah. It is like the egg of a viper that is found in the nest of an ostrich whose breaking is a sin and the little one that comes out of it is harmful.”8

التَّأَسّي بِالأكابِرِ

467. الإمام عليّ عليه السلام: لِيَتَأَسَّ صَغيرُكُم بِكَبيرِكُم، وَليَرأَف كَبيرُكُم بِصَغيرِكُم، ولا تَكونوا كَجُفاةِ الجاهِلِيَّةِ؛ لا فِي الدّينِ يَتَفَقَّهونَ، ولا عَنِ اللهِ يَعقِلُونَ، كَقَيضِ بَيضٍ في أداحٍ؛ يَكونُ كَسرُها وِزرا، وَيَخرُجُ حِضانُها شَرّا .

4.4: Fulfilling Needs

468. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “The believers are brethren. They fulfil the needs of each other, and by fulfilling each other’s needs, Allah will fulfil their needs on Judgment Day.”9

469. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “Allah will grant all the needs of he who seeks to fulfil the need of his brother.”10

470. al-Kafi, narrating from Safwan al-JammÁl who said: “I was sitting with Abu ‘Abdullah [al-Sadiq] (a.s.) when a man from Mecca named Maymun entered and complained about paying the rent of his animals. The Imam said to me: “Stand up and help your brother.”

So I stood up with him and Allah solved his problem of his rent, then I returned to my place [in the gathering]. Then Abu ‘Abdullah [al-Sadiq] (a.s.) said: “What did you do with the need of your brother?”

I said: “Allah solved it for him, may my parents be your ransom.”

He (a.s.) said: “Indeed helping your Muslim brother is more beloved for me than seven [recommended] circumambulations around the Ka’bah for the first time.”11

قَضاءُ الحاجَةِ

.468رسول الله صلى الله عليه وآله: المُؤمِنونَ إخوَةٌ، يَقضي بَعضُهُم حَوائِجَ بَعضٍ، فَبِقَضاءِ بَعضِهِم حَوائِجَ بَعضٍ يَقضِي اللهُ حَوائِجَهُم يَومَ القِيامَةِ.

.469عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: مَن كانَ في حاجَةِ أخيهِ فَإِنَّ اللهَ في حاجَتِهِ.

470. الكافي عن صفوان الجمّال: كُنتُ جالِساً مَعَ أبي عَبدِ اللهِ عليه السلام إذا دَخَلَ عَلَيهِ رَجُلٌ مِن أهلِ مَكَّةَ يُقالُ لَهُ «مَيمونٌ»، فَشَكا إلَيهِ تَعَذُّرَ الكِراءِ عَلَيهِ، فَقالَ لي: قُم فَأَعِن أخاكَ.

فَقُمتُ مَعَهُ، فَيَسَّرُ اللهُ كِراهُ، فَرَجَعتُ إلى مَجلِسي.

فَقالَ أبو عَبدِ اللهِ عليه السلام: ما صَنَعتَ في حاجَةِ أخيكَ؟ فَقُلتُ: قَضاهَا اللهُ بِأَبي أنتَ وامّي.

فَقالَ: أما إِنَّكَ أن تُعينَ أخاكَ المُسلِمَ أحَبُّ إلَيَّ مِن طَوافِ اسبوعٍ بالبَيتِ مُبتَدِئاً.

4.5: Honouring

471. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “He who honours his brother has honoured Allah, and what do you think will be done to one who has honoured Allah?”12

472. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “Honour he who loves you and turn away from your enemy and you will attain complete virtue.”13

الإِكرا مُ‏

.471رسول الله صلى الله عليه وآله: مَن أكرَمَ أخاهُ فَإِنَّما يُكرِمُ اللهَ، فَما ظَنُّكُم بِمَن يُكرِمُ اللهَ بِأَن يُفعَلَ بِهِ؟!

472. عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: أكرِم مَن وَدَّكَ، وَاصفَح عَن عَدُوِّكَ؛ يَتِمَّ لَكَ الفَضلُ.

4.6: Assisting

473. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “He who is capable of assisting and does so, Allah will assist him in this world and in the Hereafter.”14

474. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “Allah will continue to assist the servant as long as the servant assists his brother.”15

475. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said: “When friendship grows, helping and cooperation will become incumbent.”16

476. Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) said: “A believer who fails his brother while he is capable of assisting him will be forsaken by Allah in this world and in the Hereafter.”17

النُّصرَةُ

.473رسول الله صلى الله عليه وآله: مَن نَصَرَ أخاهُ المُسلِمَ وهُوَ يَستَطيعُ ذلِكَ، نَصَرَهُ اللهُ فِي الدُّنيا وَالآخِرَةِ.

.474عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: اللهُ في عَونِ العَبدِ ما كانَ العَبدُ في عَونِ أخيهِ.

475. الإمام عليّ عليه السلام: إذا نَبَتَ الوُدُّ، وَجَبَ التَّرافُدُ وَالتَّعاضُدُ.

476. الإمام الصادق عليه السلام: ما مِن مُؤمِنٍ يَخذُلُ أخاهُ وهُوَ يَقدِرُ عَلى نُصرَتِهِ، إلّا خَذَلَهُ اللهُ فِي الدُّنيا وَالآخِرَةِ.

4.7: Sharing

477. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said: “Spend your wealth on paying the rights and share it with your friend, for generosity to a person who does not ask is more fitting.”18

478. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said: “Nothing protects brotherhood as much as equal sharing.”19

479. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said: “Sharing with friends is of nobility of a family.”20

المُواساةُ

.477الإمام عليّ عليه السلام: ابذِل مالَكَ فِي الحُقوقِ، وواسِ بِهِ الصَّديقَ؛ فَإِنَّ السَّخاءَ بِالحُرِّ أخلَقُ.

.478عنه عليه السلام: ما حُفِظَتِ الاخُوَّةُ بِمِثلِ المُواساةِ.

479. عنه عليه السلام: إنَّ مُواساةَ الرِّفاقِ مِن كَرَمِ الأَعراقِ.

4.8:Maintaining Friendship

480. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said: “Protect friendship, even though you do not find a protector.”21

481. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said: “Allah, may His name be Exalted, will protect he who protects his friend.”22

حِفظُ الوُدِّ

.480الإمام عليّ عليه السلام: كُن لِلوُدِّ حافِظا وإن لَم تَجِد مُحافِظا .

481. عنه عليه السلام: إنَّ اللهَ جَلَّ ذِكرُهُ لَيَحفَظُ مَن يَحفَظُ صَديقَهُ.

4.9: Good Interaction

482. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “Meet your brother with a happy face.”23

483. Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) said: “Whoever says to his brother in faith ‘You are welcome’, Allah the Exalted will write ‘welcome’ for him until Judgment Day.”24

484. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said: “Whenever you meet your brethren, shake hands and show them your happiness, this way you leave each other while your sins have certainly been forgiven.”25

485. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said: “Cheerfulness is a trap for friendship.”26

486. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said: “Indeed Allah hates he who frowns in the faces of his brothers.”27

حُسنُ المُواجَهَةِ

.482رسول الله صلى الله عليه وآله: القَ أخاكَ بِوَجهٍ مُنبَسِطٍ.

.483الإمام الصادق عليه السلام: مَن قالَ لِأَخيهِ المُؤمِنِ: «مَرحَباً»، كَتَبَ اللهُ تَعالى لَهُ مَرحَباً إلى يَومِ القِيامَةِ.

.484الإمام عليّ عليه السلام: إذا لَقيتُم إخوانَكُم فَتَصافَحوا وأظهِروا لَهُمُ البَشاشَةَ وَالبِشرَ؛ تَتَفَرَّقوا وما عَلَيكُم مِنَ الأوزارِ قَد ذَهَبَ.

.485عنه عليه السلام: البَشاشَةُ فَخُّ المَوَدَّةِ.

486. عنه عليه السلام: إنَّ اللهَ‏عزّ وجل يُبغِضُ المُعَبِّسَ في وُجوهِ إخوانِهِ.

4.10: Good Remembrance

487. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “A believer is the brother of a believer. He protects him in his absence and guards his properties for him; and a believer is the mirror of the believer”.28

488. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “A believer is the mirror of his believing brother. When he is absent he wishes good for him, and when he is present he keeps away from him what he dislikes and he makes a place for him in a gathering.”29

489. Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) said: “Speak about your brother in his absence in the best form, better than what you like to be mentioned about when you are absent from him.”30

حُسنُ الذِّكرِ

487. رسول الله صلى الله عليه وآله: المُؤمِنُ أخُو المُؤمِنِ؛ حَيثُ يَغيبُ يَحفَظُهُ مِن وَرائِهِ، ويَكُفُّ عَنهُ ضَيعَتَهُ، وَالمُؤمِنُ مِرآةُ المُؤمِنِ.

.488عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: المُؤمِنُ مِرآةٌ لِأخيهِ المُؤمِنِ؛ يَنصَحُهُ إذا غابَ عَنهُ، ويُميطُ عَنهُ ما يَكرَهُ إذا شَهِدَ، ويُوَسِّعُ لَهُ فِي المَجلِسِ.

489. الإمام الصادق عليه السلام: اذكُروا أخاكُم إذا غابَ عَنكُم بِأَحسَنِ ما تُحِبّونَ أن تُذكَروا بِهِ إذا غِبتُم عَنهُ.

4.11: Advice and Goodwill

490. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “Every one of you should give advice [want good] to their brother the same way that he is for himself.”31

491. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “A believer is the brother of the believer and does not stop advising him at any time.”32

492. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said: “Grant your good will to your friend, your help to your acquaintances, and your good manners to all people.”33

493. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said: “Benevolence will produce love.”34

494. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said: “It is the nature of a believer to want good for others.”35

النَّصيحَةُ

.490رسول الله صلى الله عليه وآله: لِيَنصَحِ الرَّجُلُ مِنكُم أخاهُ كَنَصيحَتِهِ لِنَفسِهِ.

.491عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: المُؤمِنُ أخُو المُؤمِنِ؛ لا يَدَعُ نَصيحَتَهُ عَلى كُلِّ حالٍ.

.492الإمام عليّ عليه السلام: ابذِل لِصَديقِكَ نُصحَكَ، ولِمَعارِفِكَ مَعونَتَكَ، ولِكافَّةِ النّاسِ بِشرَكَ.

.493عنه عليه السلام: النُّصحُ يُثمِرُ المَحَبَّةَ.

.494عنه عليه السلام: المُؤمِنُ غَريزَتُهُ النُّصحُ.

4.12: Presenting the Defect as a Gift

495. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “Your best of brothers is he who shows you your defects.”36

496. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said: “A believer is the mirror of the believer, for he observes him and then fulfils his need and beautifies his character.”37

497. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said: “The fruit of brotherhood is protecting one in his absence and gifting him his defect.”38

498. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said: “He who makes your defect manifest for you is your friend.”39

499. Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) said: “The most beloved of my friends is he who gifts me my defects.”40

اهداءُ العَيبِ‏

.495رسول الله صلى الله عليه وآله: خَيرُ إخوانِكُم مَن أهدى إلَيكُم عُيوبَكُم.

.496الإمام عليّ عليه السلام: المُؤمِنُ مِرآةُ المُؤمِنِ؛ لِأَنَّهُ يَتَأَمَّلُهُ فَيَسُدُّ فاقَتَهُ، ويُجمِلُ حالَتَهُ.

.497عنه عليه السلام: ثَمَرَةُ الاخُوَّةِ حِفظُ الغَيبِ، وإهداءُ العَيبِ.

.498عنه عليه السلام: مَن أبانَ لَكَ عَيبَكَ فَهُوَ وَدودُكَ.

499. الإمام الصادق عليه السلام: أحَبُّ إخواني إلَيَّ مَن أهدى إلَيَّ عُيوبي.

4.13: Ignoring Faults

500. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said: “Be moderate with people, honour scholars and ignore the faults of your brethren; for the Master of the first and the last (s.a.w.) has disciplined you with his saying: “Forgive he who has done injustice to you, keep ties with he who has cut his ties with you, and give to he who has deprived you.”41

501. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said: “Tolerate the fault of your friend for the time your enemy attacks.”42

الصَّفحُ عَنِ الزَّلّاتِ‏

.500الإمام عليّ عليه السلام: عَلَيكَ بِمُداراةِ النّاسِ، وإكرامِ العُلَماءِ، وَالصَّفحِ عَن زَلّاتِ الإِخوانِ؛ فَقَد أدَّبَكَ سَيِّدُ الأَوَّلينَ وَالآخِرينَ بِقَولِهِ صلى الله عليه وآله: اعفُ عَمَّن ظَلَمَكَ، وصِل مَن قَطَعَكَ، وأعطِ مَن حَرَمَكَ.

.501عنه عليه السلام: احتَمِل زَلَّةَ وَلِيِّكَ لِوَقتِ وَثبَةِ عَدُوِّكَ.

4.14: Avoidance of Scorning

502. Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) said: “Do not scorn the faults of he who has come to you with his friendship, and do not hold against him his wrongs that he is ashamed of, for this is not of the morals of the Messenger of Allah or of the morals of his friends.”43

تَجَنُّبُ الطَّعنِ‏

502. الإمام الصادق عليه السلام: لا تَطعَنوا في عُيوبِ مَن أقبَلَ إلَيكُم بِمَوَدَّتِهِ، ولا توقِفوهُ عَلى سَيِّئَةٍ يَخضَعُ لَها؛ فَإِنَّها لَيسَت مِن أخلاقِ رَسولِ اللهِ صلى الله عليه وآله ومِن أخلاقِ أولِيائِهِ.

4.15: Avoiding Hurting Others

503. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “The lowest of people is he who humiliates people.”44

504. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said: “Whoever hurts a believer has hurt me, and whoever hurts me surely has hurt Allah, and whoever hurts Allah is cursed in the Torah, the Gospel, the Psalm and the Qur’an.”45

505. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said, concerning the rights of a neighbour: “When you buy fruit, gift some to him, and if you do not want to do so, carry it [into the house] secretly and do not let your child come outside with it, lest the feelings of his children become hurt.”46

506. Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) said: “By Allah, the righteous are victorious. Do you know who they are? They are those who do not even hurt a small ant.”47

تَجَنُّبُ الإيذاءِ

.503رسول الله صلى الله عليه وآله: أذَلُّ النّاسِ مَن أهانَ النّاسَ.

.504عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: مَن آذى مُؤمِناً فَقَد آذاني، ومَن آذاني فَقَد آذَى اللهَ عزّ وجلَ، ومَن آذَى اللهَ فَهُوَ مَلعونٌ فِي التَّوراةِ وَالإنجيلِ وَالزَّبورِ وَالفُرقانِ.

.505عنه صلى الله عليه وآله- في بَيانِ حُقوقِ الجارِ- إِذَا اشتَريتَ فاكِهَةً فَاهدِ لَهُ، فَإِن لَم تَفعَل فَأَدخِلها سِرّاً، ولا يَخرُج بِها وَلَدُكَ لِيَغيظَ بِها وَلَدَهُ.

.506الإمام الصادق عليه السلام: وَاللهِ الأبرارُ، أتَدري مَن هُم؟ هُمُ الَّذينَ لا يُؤذونَ الذَّرَّ .

1. Sahih al-Bukhari, vol. 5, p. 2301 h. 5877, narrating from Abu Hurayrah. al-Kafi, vol. 2, p. 646, h. 1, narrating from Jarrah al-Mada’ini from Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.).

2. . al-Kafi, vol. 2, p. 644, h. 3, narrating from al-Sakuni from Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.). Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 76, p. 12, h. 50.

3. . Kanz al-Ummal, vol. 9, p. 116, h. 25253, narrating from al-Tabarani from Abu al-Darda’.

4. . Mishkat al-Anwar, p. 346, h. 1106. Tuhaf al-’Uqul, p. 248, narrating from Imam al-Husayn (a.s.). Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 76, p. 11, h. 46.

5. . Kitab Man la Yahdarhu al-Faqih, vol. 4, p. 392, h. 5834. Nahj al-Balaghah, letter 31.

6. . Musadiqah al-Ikhwan, p. 144, h. 5, narrating from Marazim.

7. . Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 76, p. 10, h. 38.

8. . Nahj al-Balaghah, Sermon 166. Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 34, p. 113, h. 950.

9. . al-Amali, by al-Mufid, p. 150, h. 8, narrating from al-Husayn ibn Zaid. Musadiqah al-Ikhwan, p. 160, h. 5. Both narrating from Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) from his father (a.s.).

10. . Sunan Abu Dawud, vol. 4, p. 273, h. 4893. Musnad Ibn Hanbal, vol. 2, p. 400, h. 5650. Both narrating from ‘Abdullah ibn ‘Umar. al-Amali, by al-Tusi, p. 97, h.147, narrating from Muhammad ibn Yahya al-Madani from Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.), with ‘his believing Muslim brother’ instead of ‘his brother’.

11. . al-Kafi, vol. 2, p. 198, h. 9. Musadiqah al-Ikhwan, p. 176, h. 10.

12. . Thawab al-A’mal, p. 339, narrating from Abu Hurayrah and ‘Abdullah ibn ‘Abbas. ‘Uddah al-Da’i, p. 176, narrating from Imam ‘Ali (a.s.).

13. . Ghurar al-Hikam, h. 2368.

14. . Hilyah al-Awliya’, vol. 3, p. 25. Shu’ab al-Iman, vol. 6, p. 112, h. 7639. Both narrating from ‘Imran ibn Hasin.

15. . Sahih Muslim, vol. 4, p. 2074, h. 38. Sunan al-Tirmidhi, vol. 5, p. 195, h. 2945. Both narrating from Abu Hurayrah. al-Kafi, vol. 2, p. 200, h. 5, narrating from Dharih al-Muharibi from Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.), with ‘the believer’ instead of ‘the servant’ in both places.

16. . Ghurar al-Hikam, h. 4132.

17. . Thawab al-A’mal, p. 177, h. 1. al-Amali, by al-Saduq, p. 574, h. 785. al-Mahasin, vol. 1, p. 183, h. 296. All narrating from Ibrahim ibn ‘Umar al-Yamani.

18. . Ghurar al-Hikam, h. 2384. ‘Uyun al-Hikam wa al-Mawa’iz, p. 85, h. 2044.

19. . Ghurar al-Hikam, h. 9578. ‘Uyun al-Hikam wa al-Mawa’iz, p. 477, h. 8758.

20. . Ghurar al-Hikam, h. 3405. ‘Uyun al-Hikam wa al-Mawa’iz, p. 143, h. 3193.

21. . Ghurar al-Hikam, h. 7157. ‘Uyun al-Hikam wa al-Mawa’iz, p. 391, h. 6626.

22. . al-Kafi, vol. 8, p. 162, h. 166, narrating from ‘Ubaid ibn Zurarah.

23. . al-Kafi, vol. 2, p. 103, h. 3, narrating from Abu Basir from Abu Ja’far [al-Sadiq] (a.s.). Tuhaf al-’Uqul, p. 42. Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 74, p. 171, h. 38.

24. . al-Kafi, vol. 2, p. 206, h. 2, narrating from Jamil ibn Darraj. Thawab al-A’mal, p.176, h. 1, narrating from Ishaq ibn ‘Ammar.

25. . al-Khisal, p. 633, h. 10, narrating from Abu Basir and Muhammad ibn Muslim from Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) from his forefathers (a.s.). Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 76, p. 20, h. 3.

26. . Tuhaf al-’Uqul, p. 202. Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 78, p. 38, h. 13.

27. . al-Firdaws, vol. 1, p. 153, h. 555. Kanz al-Ummal, vol. 3, p. 441, h. 7350.

28. . Shu’ab al-Iman, vol. 6, p. 113, h. 7644. Kanz al-Ummal, vol. 1, p. 152, h. 756, narrating from al-Khara’iti in Makarim al-Akhlaq. Both narrating from al-Muttalib ibn ‘Abdullah ibn Hantab

29. . al-Nawadir, by al-Rawandi, p. 99, h. 56. al-Ja’fariyat, p. 197, narrating from Imam al-Kazim (a.s.) form his forefathers (a.s.). Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 74, p. 233, h.29.

30. . al-Amali, by al-Tusi, p. 225, h. 391, narrating from ‘Ubaidullah ibn ‘Abdullah. Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 78, p. 196, h. 17.

31. . al-Kafi, vol. 2, p. 208, h. 4. al-Amali, by al-Tusi, p. 231, h. 410. Both narrating from Jabir from Imam al-Baqir (a.s.). Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 74, p. 358, h. 7.

32. . al-Jami’ al-Saghir, vol. 2, p. 662, h. 9156. Kanz al-Ummal, vol. 1, p. 142, h. 687. Both narrating from Ibn al-Najjar from Jabir.

33. . Ghurar al-Hikam, h. 2466.

34. . Ghurar al-Hikam, h. 614. ‘Uyun al-Hikam wa al-Mawa’iz, p. 32, h. 558.

35. . Ghurar al-Hikam, h. 1305. ‘Uyun al-Hikam wa al-Mawa’iz, p. 47, h. 1191.

36. . Tanbih al-Khawatir, vol. 2, p. 123.

37. . Tuhaf al-’Uqul, p. 173. Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 77, p. 414, h. 38.

38. . Ghurar al-Hikam, h. 4633. ‘Uyun al-Hikam wa al-Mawa’iz, p. 208, h. 4167.

39. . Ghurar al-Hikam, h. 8210. ‘Uyun al-Hikam wa al-Mawa’iz, p. 444, h. 7786.

40. . al-Kafi, vol. 2, p. 639, h. 5. Tuhaf al-’Uqul, p. 366.

41. . Tadhkirah al-Khawas, p. 136. Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 78, p. 71, h. 34.

42. . al-Irshad, vol. 1, p. 299. Kanz al-Fawa’id, vol. 1, p. 93. Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 77, p. 419, h. 40.

43. . al-Kafi, vol. 8, p. 150, h. 132. Tanbih al-Khawatir, vol. 2, p. 146. Both narrating from Mas’adah ibn Sadaqah.

44. . Kitab Man la Yahdarhu al-Faqih, vol. 4, p. 396, h. 5840, narrating from Yunus ibn Zabyan. Ma’ani al-Akhbar, p. 195, h. 1, narrating from Abu Hamzah al-Thumali. Both narrating from Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) from his forefathers (a.s.). Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 75, p. 142, h. 2.

45. . Mishkat al-Anwar, p. 149, h. 358. Rawdah al-Wa’izin, p. 321. Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 67, p. 72, h. 40.

46. . al-Targhib wa al-Tarhib, vol. 3, p. 357, h. 20. Musakkin al-Fu’ad, p. 105. Both narrating from ‘Amr ibn Shu’aib from his father from his grandfather. Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 82, p. 94, h. 46.

47. . Tafsir al-Qummi, vol. 2, p. 146, narrating from Hafs ibn Ghiyath. Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 2, p. 27, h. 5 and vol. 78, p. 193, h. 7.

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Food for the mind

Table of Contents

Chapter 1 - Introduction

Part 1 - The Foundations of Upbringing a Child

Chapter 2 - Introduction

1- Organising a Meritorious Family

2- The Role of Heredity

3- The Role of the Parents’ Food

4- The Role of the Method of Copulation

Part 2 - Family

1.1: The Forming of a Family

1.2: Seeking to have a Child

1.3: The Virtue of a Righteous Child

1.4: The Believers’ Offspring will be with them in Heaven

1.5: The Virtue of Tolerating the Troubles of a Child

1.6: Abundant Children

1.7: The Virtue of Girls

1.8: The Reward of Upbringing Girls

1. 9: Taking Care of Daughters

1.10: The Censure of Disliking Girls

1.11: The Bane of Having a Bad Child

1.12: Beseeching Allah for a Righteous Family

Part 3 - Heredity

2.1: Blood is Contagious

2.2: The Role of Heredity in the Creation of a Child

2.3: The Role of Heredity in the Behaviour of a Child

2.4: The Role of Marrying Relatives

Part 4 - The Food of the Parents

3.1: The Role of Unlawful Food in a Newborn

3.2: The Role of the Father’s Food in his Child

3.3: The Role of a Pregnant Woman’s Food on the Foetus

3.4: The Role of a Mother’s Food on the Newborn

Part 5 - The Forming of the Life-germ

4.1: The Effects of being Born Pure

4.2: The Effects of Impure Birth

4.3: The Harm of Copulating with a Woman during her Menses

4.4: The Blessings of Supplicating During Intercourse

4.5: The Role of the Conditions on the Formation of the Life-Germ

Part 6 - The Rights of Children

Chapter 3 - Introduction

1- Honouring the Birth

2- Bathing the Newborn

3- Reciting Adhan and Iqamah in the Newborn’s Ears

4- Feeding the Newborn for the First Time

5- Choosing a Good Name

6- Shaving the Newborn’s Head

7- To Offer a Sacrifice for the Newborn

8- Circumcision of the Baby

Part 7 - The Rights of a Newborn

The Rights of a Newborn

1.2: Washing the Newborn

1.3: Reciting Adhan and Iqamah in the Newborn’s ears

1.4: The First Feeding

1.5: Naming

1.6: Shaving the Head

1.7: Giving an Offering for a Child

1.8: Circumcision

Part 8 - The Rights of a Suckling Infant

1- Suitable Nutrition

2- Respecting the Feelings

2.1: Being Breastfed from the Mother’s Milk, if Possible

2.2: Choosing a Righteous Wet-nurse to Breastfeed

2.3: Those Who Should not Be Asked for Suckling

2.4: Feeding the Child Beneficial Foods

2.5: Respecting the Infant’s Feelings

Part 9 - Education

3.1: The Value of Seeking Knowledge at a Young Age

3.2: The Value of Upbringing

3.3: The Responsibility of Education and Upbringing

3.4: The Most Important Obligatory Thing to Teach

3.5: The Age of Upbringing and Disciplining a Child

3.6: The Method of Islamic Upbringing

3.7: The Banes of Upbringing

3.8: Sex Education

Some Words about Sex Education

Necessary Planning for Sexual Chastity

Part 10 - The Ethics of Upbringing

4.1: Encouragement of the Loving of Children and Having Sympathy to Them

4.2: The Prophet’s Conduct in Kindness to Children and Dignifying Them

4.3: Greeting Children

4.4: Reproaching the Disliking of Children

4.5: The Boundaries of Love to Children

4.6: Justice Between Children

4.7: Fulfilling a Promise

4.8: Bringing Happiness

Part 11 - Ornamentation and Playing

5.1: Ornamenting Children

5.2: Praising the Playfulness of Children

5.3: Allowing a Child to Play

5.4: Acting in a Childish Manner for Children And Playing with Them

5.5: The Children’s Entertainment Place

The Function of Playing in the Growth of a Child

The Importance of Playing from a Psychological Viewpoint

A Psychological Analysis of Playing

The Age of Playing

The Parents Playing with the Child

Part 12 - Supplication

6.1: Encouraging Supplication for Children

6.2: Reproaching of Supplicating Against the Children

6.3: The Supplication of Imam al-Sajjad (a.s.) for his Children

A Father’s Prayer for His Child

Part 13 - The Child’s Duties - The Individual Duties of a Child

1.1: Observing Discipline in the Affairs

1.2: Cleanliness

1.3: Washing hands before and after Food

1.4: Brushing the Teeth

1.5: Washing Hands before Sleeping

1.6: Cutting Nails

Part 14 - The Children’s Duties Towards their Parents

2.1: The Importance of the Rights of Parents

2.2: The Rights of Parents

2.3: General Rights of Parents

2.4: The Benefits of Doing Good to Parents

Part 15 - The Child’s Duties Towards His Teacher

3.1: Obedience

3.2: Honouring

3.3: Lowering the Voice

3.4: Avoidance of Belittling

Part 16 - The Child’s Duties Towards Elders and Friends

4.1: Initiating with Greeting

4.2:Observing Rights

4.3: Taking the Elders as Examples

4.4: Fulfilling Needs

4.5: Honouring

4.6: Assisting

4.7: Sharing

4.8:Maintaining Friendship

4.9: Good Interaction

4.10: Good Remembrance

4.11: Advice and Goodwill

4.12: Presenting the Defect as a Gift

4.13: Ignoring Faults

4.14: Avoidance of Scorning

4.15: Avoiding Hurting Others